Mira8 Reviews

A Chef's Life (2013–2018)

barely watchable

[1/10 · 9 August 2020]

I'm very interested in food, foodways, cooking, all of that. But I have to change the channel when this woman comes on. She's a crabby, spoiled, entitled white woman who is constantly complaining, putting people down, being nasty to her staff, being nasty to her husband, and being horribly condescending to the black people whose southern food culture she is appropriating. I pity her children. I pity anyone who has to come in contact with Vivian Howard.

Snoopy Come Home (1972)

The life and times of a clinically depressed bald child

[1/10 · 26 August 2014]

Dear Lord kill it with fire. I remember enjoying Peanuts cartoons and comics as a child. So I got this for my nephew. I was horrified as these memories came flooding back to me. THIS IS SO DEPRESSING!

In what ways is it depressing...well let me see. The plot line is depressing. The songs are depressing. The characters for the most part are mean and shallow...and depressing. I don't know what else I can say without providing spoilers. I mean, yeah, it does *kinda* have a happy ending but it will still leave you feeling like a shallow, wrecked hunk of humanity.

Don't get this for your kids, your adults, anyone. Just avoid. Trust me - should come with a warning label.

Temptation: Confessions of a Marriage Counselor (2013)

I had to see for myself...

[1/10 · 6 April 2013]

... if this movie was as awful as the reviews stated. It was.

It's just...it's just SO bad. It's so bad it's like a parody of itself. Where to begin? The acting is horrible. The plot is implausible. The dialog...who talks like this? No one I've ever known in my life. From the big parts, like Judith, to small parts, like Crazy White Lady Who Works in the Drug Store - no one acts or speaks like a normal person. And who has a window in the middle of their house that goes from the bedroom to the kitchen? "I need to be able to see into my kitchen. And this will come in handy in case of a dramatic fight scene later." Kim Kardashian is the worst though. Her entire part consists of wearing tight designer dresses, and yelling at the lead character for not doing the same. In a film of shallow characters, she's the shallowest.

In this film, Tyler Perry insults black people, white people, men, women, Christians, Southerners, drugstore employees, and anyone with eyeballs.

The Best and the Brightest (2010)

brilliant, must-see film

[10/10 · 8 June 2011]

Just saw this film at a small screening in Ambler PA with the writer/director on hand. It was the best thing I've seen all year. Funny, witty, fast paced, unpredictable, and NOT aimed at a bunch of hormonal 15 year old boys. This is a movie for grownups - open minded grownups.

The plot about the parents' struggle to get their daughter into a tony kindergarten is almost secondary: what makes this film so brilliant are the characters. These are real people - as over the top as some of them are at times, these are real people, portrayed in a refreshing and open manner. The casting is brilliant; I honestly can't say who was my favorite performer because they were all outstanding in their roles from start to finish.

See this movie, you'll be glad you did.

No More Ladies (1935)

nuts to you!

[8/10 · 8 November 2005]

Just saw this little known gem on AMC, and I rather liked it.

Yes, the dialogue was often banal.

And yes, Joan's eyebrows are scary

But overall, it's fun and light. I was laughing out loud, and I think you will be too.

And I always wonder when seeing a movie like this - did anyone ever really live that way?

The ending is a little odd.

But Franchot Tone as Cousin Drunky and Edna Mae Oliver as Grandma Sarcasmo just steal the show.

Arthur Treacher as the befuddled Brit is also quite clever.

Being Julia (2004)

a brilliant film, NOT A REMAKE

[8/10 · 14 March 2005]

OK, first of all, IGNORE ALL THE REVIEWS that say this is just like All About Eve. No it isn't. Yes, they both have characters that have careers in the theatre, and there is an older actress, and then about halfway through a younger one comes along. Similarity ends there. You might as well say Independence Day is just a remake of ET because they both have aliens come to Earth.

Annette Bening is fabulous as the gloriously egotistical Julia, and the key difference between her character here and Bette Davis' in Eve is that Julia DOESN'T NEED A MAN TO SURVIVE. OK? Now everyone -- rent one, then the other, watch them again, pay attention this time. Thank you very much.

Aqua Teen Hunger Force (2000–2023)

The first time I saw this...

[7 July 2004]

I thought it was completely stupid and pointless.

Why does Frylock float? Why does Meatwad turn into an igloo? Why is Master Shake such a jerk? What's up with any of this?! I mean, its completely surreal and makes no sense.

And now I think that's why I love it so much. That, and its hilarious. I'm completely totally addicted to this show now. I'm still not sure why. I've heard people say because its so original. I guess, all I know is I bought a DVD player just for ATHF.

Just watch it. You'll get it.

Then come back here and explain it to me!

The O.C. (2003–2007)

I completely agree

[13 August 2003]

with the posters that say this'll fill in nicely for Buffy on Tuesday nights. The characters are HOT, esp. Ryan. But what's more, they actually show a potential for being complex and well drawn. As in the second episode, where Luke didn't just let Ryan burn up in the model home as we had been led to expect he might.

I expected a lot of cheesy dialog ("Welcome to the OC, bitch!") but was surprised that I actually found myself getting into this beyond just the eye candy aspect. I hope this is around for a while.

Where the Boys Are (1960)

ah, for the days when women were chattel

[1 August 2003]

NOT a lighthearted beach romp as I'd mistakenly thought. I finally caught this on Turner Classics last night and was amazed at what a modern (well, for the 60s) morality play it was. It starts out with the goofy yellow title fonts and jazzy music that scream "Hey Kids, Sixties Teen Comedy!" ... but it quickly turns into anything but. Chaste Girl, "Liberated" but really wants a Husband Girl, Easy Girl and Comic Relief Girl all play their parts to show us the moral of the story - SEX BEFORE MARRIAGE IS BAD.

And trust me, this is played with NO subtlety at all. **Warning: Spoilers Ahead** After a scene that in which the "bad" girl has sex against her will (but was clearly "asking for it", having consented earlier), she wanders dazedly down the middle of the road and is nearly hit by a car. Several of them, actually. The sound effects of horns and swerving are hilariously cartoonish; at one point I swear Roger Rabbit's car went by. I expected an anvil with "Acme" written on it to come crashing down on her.

This film was made during the time my parents were courting, and mom says its a fairly accurate portrayal of the social mores of the time. Other than "sex is bad", we get ideas like "why finish college, get your husband and go", and "be a baby machine." Ever wonder why so many 60s moms drank and took tranquilizers? See this nightmare ... you won't wonder anymore.

If.... (1968)

If....only it made sense.

[15 May 2003]

Well, call me the stupid American but I just didn't get it. After years and years of reading about what a masterpiece this is, finally rented it (with some rather intellectual friends) this past weekend. We couldn't finish it; and that says a lot, 'cause we've sat through some doozies. It was like medicine that you know is supposed to be good for you but tastes simply unbearable.

I think the rental box should have a warning sticker on it that says "YOU MUST BE BRITISH TO ENJOY THIS FILM" -- not a slam, just a fact.

Chicago (2002)

the Emperor has no clothes...

[11 February 2003]

I don't get it. I really don't get it. This movie sucked on ice. The plot was practically non-existent, and the singing and dancing, while good, was not enough to hold my interest. I could care less about any of the characters or anything that happened to them. It didn't suck quite as much as Moulin Rouge, but it was definitely up there. If this stinkbag takes home Oscars I'll be amazed and disappointed.

Jungle Fever (1991)

Ok, one correction

[1 February 2003]

Ok, any true fan of Spike Lee *or* Sam Jackson would know Sam was in Lee's "School Daze", which came several years before Jungle Fever.

Now that we've cleared that up....

GREAT movie. A little hard to take at times, and I'm also a little confused about the subplots. But well worth watching again and again.

Warrior of the Lost World (1983)

...tubular...

[8 January 2003]

This is truly a great example of a good bad film. My favorite things are:

-- It's very poignant that they obviously, from the way it ends, thought there'd be sequels (good lord there weren't, were there?).

--Like Space Mutiny, I loved this movie because it just screams "Hey, It's The Eighties!"

--The big, slobbery kiss at the end like 'oh, there's all this built-up passion' ... folks, he abandoned her to the evil Donald Pleasence clone, and then she shot him in the face!! Ah, young love.

Don't miss this gem, either in the original or the MST3K version.

Braveheart (1995)

according to this film all englishmen are gay or total b****rds...

[25 November 2002]

Unfortunately, they left out rude, self-righteous, traitorous, untrustworthy...

No seriously, this is one of the top 10 films ever made. It *does* get just the teeniest bit cornball toward the end, but by then you're right there with it. A must see, a must OWN.

Dogma (1999)

craptacular...

[18 November 2002]

What a great word! And description of this movie. Now I know, there are those people that, if Kevin Smith filmed himself giving his grandmother an enema, would think it was cinematic genius. If you're one of those please skip this review.

They started out with a great premise, great plot, great characters, great everything....then it just degenerated into a huge ol' bash religion fest. Thing is, I agree with a lot of the ideas (NOT beliefs, ha ha) presented in this film. So why did they have to downgrade into a bloodbath on the stairs of the cathedral? I'm not even Catholic, but I was like "Christ, wouldja ease up already!" As soon as I saw ol' George "I'm a washed up has-been and I hate everyone and everything" Carlin as the Bishop, I knew we were going downhill and I wasn't proven wrong.

And what a waste of the hilarious and multi-talented Chris Rock, too!!! Dogma was just SOOOO disappointing on so many levels.

My Big Fat Greek Wedding (2002)

I think I waited way too long to see this film...

[11 November 2002]

No doubt, I loved it -- I laughed out loud, I cried when her father (SPOILERS!) bought them the house, I thoroughly enjoyed myself.

But after 50,000 people tell you HOW INCREDIBLY GREAT a movie is, you end up with altered expectations and I know that was true in my case. I was expecting just a little more. As it is, I definitely have to agree with the folks who said it lacked "oomph."

Signs (2002)

Depending on who you are, the best film of the year...

[5 August 2002]

I'm going to steal a quote directly from another posting here, because I can't say it any better: "For the MTV Generation viewers expecting to see phasers, spaceship battles, gratuitous violence, and state-of-the-art costume designs: stay home."

But if you have intelligence and imagination you are going to LOVE this. Expect to laugh, cry, and have the bejeeszus scared out of you. It truly does work on so many levels. It truly is, imho, the best thing M. Night has ever done.

Spoilers? Nah -- not gonna give you any. Just take my advice, RUN and see this, NOW. But don't expect to sleep much tonight...

Rating: **** out of ****

Moulin Rouge! (2001)

a musical version of the English Patient

[30 March 2002]

Yes, you either loved this or hated it, and put me in the "hated it!" camp.

I truly wanted to love this movie - I really like Nicole Kidman, and certainly she's very beautiful to look at. As are the sets, costumes, etc. But the plot, if there can be said to be one, drags and drags and drags and drags and .... you get the idea.

POSSIBLE spoiler - as someone else mentioned, they basically tell you from the beginning the girl's going to die. And then the slower the plot gets, you find yourself yelling at the screen "JUST DIE ALREADY!" And rooting for the romantic lead to get shot. Anything to stop the endless singing about how bloody much they love each other.

Guess that makes me quite the cynic. :) But seriously, "Manos, the Hands of Fate" is an action packed thrill ride compared to this slogging swamp of a movie.

Manos: The Hands of Fate (1966)

Hey, I may be lonely but at least I'm not one of the Master's sheet-clad wives!!

[1/10 · 27 February 2002]

going through a little heartbreak right now - so I did the only thing that always makes me feel better. I popped in this movie. OH, I should say the MST3K verison that is...the only experiment in which the mads actually APOLOGIZE to Joel and the 'bots for how bad it is. That should tell you something.

And then for days after watching it, you'll have all the haunting theme music in your head....the cat on the keys piano, the elevator music (little Manos takin' us up to news time here), the Shirley Bassey, and of course the haunting Torgo theme.

A MUST SEE.

"There is no way out of here. It'll be dark soon. There is no way out of here....."

The Time Machine (1960)

not bad, for 1960

[28 December 2001]

So young was I, when I first saw this film, that I thought it was the heighth of high hilarity that there was a character called "Weena." Saw it again the other night on TCM, and was surprised by how good it actually was, for its time.

There are a few things that don't make sense - if the Morlocks are the so-called technologically advanced species, why are they afraid of fire? And like I'm so sure that department store would survive all those wars and yet that maniquin would be in exactly the same place.

And some of the speeded-up sequences look so fake its hilarious.

But still, for 1960, not bad.

Space Mutiny (1988)

a real howler

[12 December 2001]

For one thing, this movie has THE EIGHTIES written all over it. 80s computers: there are a lot of really superfluous scenes where a character will pull up some "really vital" data on a screen which basically looks like your kid brother playing Defender or Galaga. And the 80s hair and fashions are the worst.

Other great things: the spooky half naked dancing chicks - we never get to find out who they are, or what they were doing, but they look swell doing it!

The floor buffer race, where Captain Hunky inexplicably screams and jumps out of his cart.

The many, many, MANY "railing deaths."

And last but not least, like the other guy mentioned, the girl who is killed and moments later, is back at her post. If you're like me, you're sitting there waiting for a plot development like it turns out it's actually her evil pod self or something, but nah. Just the world's worst continuity.

Clerks (1994)

I thought this was quite fabulous

[22 August 2001]

but I guess its one of those love it or hate it movies. Personally, I found it EXTREMELY funny, and very poignant at times, but then I know I guy *exactly* like Dante, and stuff like this *does* keep happening to him. The dialog was fabulous, and if you've ever worked retail, you will stand up and cheer at such scenes as "milk maid" and "are either of these any good?"

I was amazed that I'd never heard of anyone in this movie, and then even more amazed when I found out it was this low budget pic and everyone in it was just friends, etc. of the director! Full budget Hollywood movies get made with so-called professionals that suck on ice compared to this movie! Give it a chance.

Oh yeah, I do have *one* little problem with it - SPOILERS AHEAD - in spite of the little anecdote about her past activity that supposedly sets up the believability of the ending, no way. Caitlin would have had to be brain-dead to think an old dead guy was Dante. But trust me, everything that happened up till that was TOTALLY believeable.

Fright Night (1985)

Awful, dreadful, terrible

[20 August 2001]

Can't make up its mind if it wants to be scary or funny and thus succeeds in neither. If you want a funny vampire movie, I recommend Buffy the Vampire Slayer or Lost Boys. For a scary one, From Dusk Till Dawn. If you want to rent a total piece of garbage and waste of money, this thing. Here's a hint - Marcy Darcy from Married with Children is the romantic lead. That gives you a glimpse of how crappy this movie is. Ugh.

Fright Night (1985)

I cannot believe...

[20 August 2001]

that this film is considered the cream of the crop, vampire-movie wise. I thought it was worthy of an MST3K-style spoofing, if anything. I caught this the other night on - believe it or not - American Movie Classics. I didn't see the lead-in but this film was about as classic as crap on a cracker.

Horrible, cheeseball acting, utterly stupid characters, and to top it off, Amanda "Marcy Darcy" Bearse from "Married with Children" is the female lead! Yeah, real sexy. **Spoilers** She looks like a boy the entire movie, then she gets turned into a vamp and is actually kinda sexy, then she recovers and goes back to looking like an ugly boy. Of course, a lot of women had those ugly haircuts in the 80s, only she STILL has it. But I digress. Let's see. What else sucks about this movie. Oh, well the holes in the plot you could drive a truck through, the scenery-chewing death throes every murdered character goes through (I think they were trying to set some kind of record), the "it's over now - or is it..." ending, the list goes on. I recommend you rent this only if you like making fun of bad movies.

Like Water for Chocolate (1992)

This is one of my favorite all time movies.

[16 August 2001]

I still can't watch it all the way through without crying. Here are some hints: If you insist on judging this film by American standards, you will hate it. You won't understand the poignancy, subtle conveyance of deep emotion, the repressed longing, the beauty and sadness. You won't get the complex NON-cartoony characters. And boy, you REALLY won't get the ending.

IIf your idea of a good romantic film is the typical Hollywood drek (i.e., anything starring Julia Roberts), pass this one by, because you just won't get it. Unfortunately I see this advice came too late to many of you. Here's a hint for the future - better avoid Marquez, too.