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People I'd love to meet if there's an afterlife
"He just wanted to get laid" could have been the tagline
Reviews
Total Recall (2012)
Better than I expected, don't think of it as a remake of the 1990 classic.
When I heard the news of a Total Recall reboot, I thought that this is going to be terrible and like all remakes of today, not going to live up to the original. There was a time when remakes can be better than the original film (The Thing, The Fly) but filmmakers do not seem to improve them.
As expected, it's terrible as a remake of the 1990 Arnie classic BUT as a stand alone film (or a new adaption of the book, We Can Remember It For You Wholesale), it's an entertaining little sci-fi action thriller.
This is more like what Philip K Dick made it out to be in the original book, We Can Remember It For You Wholesale. They should of changed this movie's title though because Total Recall is too much known for the 1990 film. Also, there are some references to the 1990 film (I mean by the woman with 3 boobs, the lady that says "2 weeks", etc.) that ruined it slightly, because it just makes it a constant reminder of the original film. Not that it's a bad thing, but it ruins this from being a stand alone film. Even some of the lines are the same as the 1990 film, they could of at least had different dialogue. At least it wasn't constant like Rob Zombie's Halloween, which makes you want to watch the John Carpenter classic instead from the first 5 minutes. The acting was actually pretty good, Colin Farrell seems more convincing than Arnie as the character has always meant to be a normal average guy, not Mr Universe. But Colin can never be as entertaining as Arnie.
Daredevil (2003)
Better the second time
I wasn't so fussed with this film when it first came out but I gave it another chance and I thought this is actually pretty good, not a great like X-Men or Spider Man that came along at that time but much better than Hulk. Very entertaining stuff, probably needed more focus on the plot and the villains, would make the film feel less short. Shame that there was never a sequel. Possibly more build up to the plot, the background story for Daredevil happened too quick.
Colin Farrell was actually good in this as Bullseye, he definitely needed more screen time. Otherwise, good superhero action with interesting characters and doesn't get boring.
Ben Affleck did a good job as Daredevil, it's a shame that there was no sequel because his character seems likable.
Out in Fifty (1999)
It's not as awful as I expected
It looked pretty cheap on the DVD but I gave it a chance as it's got Mickey Rourke in it. The film itself is obviously a low budget independent film but it didn't turn out as bad as I expected, I have seen a lot worse films (Troll 2, Birdemic, Skyline) and compared to them, this one is pretty good.
Mickey Rourke gave a good performance as a alcoholic cop who wants revenge on a man who gets released from prison for the murder of Rourke's wife.
A little dark and at times tries to act like a Tarantino films, especially at the intro. If you can pass some of the mediocre performances by some people, then you won't mind watching this at least once. I'm glad I got this one cheap, not the best film ever but not as awful as people say.
The Expendables 2 (2012)
The boys are back in town!
This is actually better than the original, more action and great moments with Stallone and the guys.
Jet Li is only in the film for 10 minutes but has a great fight scene at the start which is good to see as he didn't actually had so much chance at showing it in the first film (except for the little moments when he fought Dolph Lundgren).
Jean Claude Van Damme stars as the villain literally named Jean Villain. He proves in this film that he can actually make a good bad guy, shame that he doesn't have much screen time as the rest of them. Scott Adkins made a good henchman, not surprising that his character works for Van Damme, he seems to appear in a lot of Van Damme's DTV stuff recently.
Well worth watching if you love 80s and 90s action films and obviously if you loved the first film.
I hope they make more Expendables films, Dwayne Johnson and Jackie Chan seem interested in roles. Definitely need Steven Seagal as the next villain.
The Toolbox Murders (1978)
Not bad video nasty, got slow half way through
This late 70s exploitation slasher film begins brilliantly with a series of murders done by a man dressed in black with a ski mask, using tools from a toolbox to kill his victims in different ways.
The first part of this film alone goes well with other slasher films of the 70s and 80s but unfortunately half way through the film, you find out who the killer is and most of the time after that you pretty much have him talking to a girl that he kidnapped and tied up on a bed. It all gets pretty slow from there.
Claims to be based on a true story, probably trying to cash in on the more famous slasher film The Texas Chainsaw Massacre.
Not bad for what it is, could of been more interesting at the second half of the film but it's forgiven for the first half which is brilliant for it's type of film.
The Expendables (2010)
The best film of 2010
Brilliant action film, tons of explosions, good humour, amazing! One of the best action movies of recent years, doesn't take itself too seriously and it being a box office success goes to show that action movies today does not have to use that serious and realistic Bourne look that people seem to copy these days. This is a throwback to the 80s and 90s films where you had Schwarzenegger and Stallone piling up the bodies of bad guys, creating characters with cheesy yet memorable quotes. Sly Stallone, Jason Statham, Dolph Lundgren, Jet Li, Mickey Rourke and Bruce Willis (in a small role) were brilliant. Although it was just one scene, it was nice to see Arnold Schwarzenegger in the film with Bruce and Sly. Definitely worth watching if you love those guys.
It was unfortunate that Jean Claude Van Damme turned down a role in this film, luckily he got a role in the sequel EXPENDABLES 2.
Coogan's Bluff (1968)
Before Dirty Harry, there was Coogan's Bluff.
The first in a series of films that starred Clint Eastwood and directed by Don Siegel, they both worked together again for the films Two Mules for Sister Sara, The Beguiled, Dirty Harry and Escape from Alcatraz (might count Play Misty for Me as Clint gave Don a cameo role).
Coogan's Bluff stars Clint as Sheriff Coogan who gets sent to New York City from Arizona to pick up a fugitive who is wanted for murder.
The character Coogan is definitely a lot like the more iconic character Harry Callahan which came along a few years later in Dirty Harry. This is from a time though when Clint was just best known for the Dollars trilogy and the TV series Rawhide which makes it interesting to watch as it's Clint's first successful attempt to step outside the western and war genres.
The film itself is pretty much a western but set in modern times and it works well. If you love the Dirty Harry films or a fan of Clint Eastwood or Don Siegel (or both), you'll love this one.
Halloween II (2009)
Shameful display.
What the heck was this film trying to be? I thought it was meant to be a Halloween sequel. I don't blame Rob Zombie for this as he was basically pushed to do a sequel to his remake which was way better than this rubbish. THERE IS ONLY ONE HALLOWEEN 2 THAT IS THE 1981 SEQUEL TO THE CLASSIC ORIGINAL.
But hopefully, a new Halloween film that will probably happen in the near future will be an improvement to this terrible excuse for a sequel. I thought Halloween 3 - Season of the Witch was even better than this and that had nothing to do with Michael Myers (as a stand alone film, it's pretty decent) but even as a stand alone film, it sucks. The 1 star is for the death scenes, seriously they are the only worth watching bits of the film (if you can survive going through the other scenes of the film), otherwise this is one of the worst films ever made. Highlander 2 was awful but at least it's watchable for the unintentional comedy it was.
A Good Day to Die Hard (2013)
Should of been better
It does not feel like a proper Die hard film but not the total disappointment that I expected from the other comments about the film.
The idea of having John McClane in Russia looking for his son is a pretty good idea and it could of been done well but unfortunately they took the story to a route that made it less of a Die Hard film.
The action and characters was good but it was never clear about who was the main villain like you see in the previous Die Hard films, nothing memorable about them either. (No one can really be as memorable as Alan Rickman and Jeremy Irons from the 1st and 3rd films).
Bruce Willis was as good as ever, he had a few lines that made him more like John McClane than Die Hard 4.0 but this film didn't really help with its surprisingly short time for a Die Hard film (98 minutes) and it's crappy "everything explodes for no reason" style that has suffered in today's action movies since the start of Michael Bay's career. Jai Courtney was alright as his son, the chemistry was okay and he never gets annoying after a while like Justin Long was at times in Die Hard 4.0.
If you love the Die Hard films, you will be disappointed. Without watching it as a Die Hard sequel and just watching it as another Bruce Willis action film, it's not that bad.
On the plus side (if it means anything), the whole of "Yippie Ki-Yay mother f****r" is in there.
Taxi Driver (1976)
One of the greatest movies ever made
Director Martin Scorsese teams up with Robert De Niro, one of the most intense actors of the time to create a masterpiece of urban alienation. Taxi Driver is one of those films that you never get tired of watching and you always find little more detail that you never noticed before.
Robert De Niro is at his best in his role of Travis Bickle, a lonely and disturbed Vietnam veteran who works as a night time taxi driver because he can't sleep at night. He drives around the streets of New York at night; most of the streets he stops are full of junkies and prostitutes which are the main elements of the world where Travis lives. The scenes when you see Travis driving his taxi is shown as if you are seeing the gritty streets of New York and the junkies through his eyes. Travis is a misunderstood guy who is seeking desperately for some kind of company because as he says 'loneliness has followed me all my life, everywhere' but at the same time he seems to not do anything to avoid his situation and it is seen when he goes with Betsy (played by Cybill Shepherd) to a porn cinema.
Travis gets obsessed with a 12 year old prostitute named Iris (played by Jodie Foster) and at the time it was shocking. Travis wanted to make a difference by convincing Iris to go back home where she should belong.
Travis later on changes his look by cutting his hair to make a Mohawk punk look, he gets on his gun holster and straps up knives with tape and one that he made by himself that puts a gun straight into his hand when he flicks his hand down. It shows in this scene that he is getting prepared to kill someone and the original plan for him was to assassinate a presidential candidate. He attempted to assassinate a presidential candidate that Betsy supported but he got caught putting his hand into his jacket that makes him look like he's getting a gun out so he ran off, later at night he went to where Iris lives and kills all the gangsters and pimps there and gets called a hero by newspapers, if he carried on with his plan to assassinate the candidate he would have been in newspapers as the assassin. The ending has many viewers wonder if the aftermath of the shootout scene is real or a dream because of the camera techniques used there after the shootout as if Travis is dead and his spirit has left his body and looking at what he has done. I believe that he didn't die and the camera technique was used to show what he had done during the shootout; the last scene to me showed that he is going to snap again just like that in the future but only next time, he won't be a hero as said in the newspapers. Scorsese has made a great ending to this film because it makes the viewer think and decide what happened after the shootout even though Scorsese himself claimed that Travis lives at the end.
The movie is enhanced by an excellent music soundtrack by the late great jazz composer Bernard Herrmann who composed the music for many classics such as Psycho and Cape Fear.
I give this film 10 out of 10 because in my honest opinion, everything about this film is absolutely brilliant. The acting, cinematography, locations, soundtrack and plot goes perfectly together and created one of the greatest movies ever made. That is obviously why Martin Scorsese later worked with Robert De Niro again in other movies that are also considered classics like Raging Bull, Goodfellas and Casino. There has never been a film quite like Taxi Driver before 1976 and looking at the films these days which includes CGI filled blockbusters like Harry Potter and Twilight that always invaded the cinemas every year, I don't think there might not be a movie quite like this again.
Die Hard (1988)
Possibly the greatest action movie of all time!
Bruce Willis is John McClane who is a New York cop who goes to visit his wife at a Christmas party at her workplace in LA. Meanwhile, a group of terrorists (the leader Hans Gruber played by the brilliant Alan Rickman) who take everyone in the building hostile except for McClane who luckily escaped and goes on the search for planted bombs.
This is possibly the greatest action film of all time, Die Hard turned Bruce Willis from a TV star (Just known for Moonlighting at he time) into a big Hollywood star and also made Alan Rickman famous.
Arnold Shwarzenegger, Burt Reynolds and Richard Gere nearly got the role of John McClane, it was lucky that Bruce Willis got it because it wouldn't have been the same. If you like this, you'll also like Die Hard 2, 3 and 4, Lethal Weapon 1, 2, 3 and 4, Under Siege 1 and 2, Speed, The Rock, Con Air, Last Boy Scout and nearly all of the early Steven Seagal films.
First Blood (1982)
A underrated 80s action flick which is clearly better than the sequels
The original Rambo film before he became known as a one man army as shown in the sequels, Sylvester Stallone plays John Rambo who is a Vietnam veteran who gets pushed too far by a deputy sheriff who hates drifters coming into the small town. Rambo gets into trouble by not doing as he says and gets arrested, he was forced to have a shave but the knife used for shaving reminded him of the torture and pain that occurred in the war camps of Vietnam so he pushed his way out of the police station and went to the woods to hide with the cops following him in there. A fun underrated action flick which is clearly better than the sequels which I love too but not as good. Before Stallone accepted the role as John Rambo, the role nearly went to Steve McQueen (who really wanted to play Rambo), Clint Eastwood, Robert De Niro, Al Pacino (who nearly got the role but turned down because he wanted him to be psychotic), Michael Douglas and Dustin Hoffman. Luckily, Stallone got the role and became another big known character of his along with Rocky and Cobra.
Death Wish (1974)
Charles Bronson - The Original Vigilante
This is the film that Charles Bronson is best known for as a man named Paul Kersey who turns vigilante after his wife and daughter were attacked by muggers. A classic of the action genre, Death Wish along with Dirty Harry and The French Connection influences many action films you see today. The film also made Charles Bronson who was before known for his co-starring roles in The Great Escape and The Magnificent Seven into a star and that got him to become the leading role in his movies since. Death Wish spawned 4 sequels which were not as good as the original but Death Wish 2 and 3 are worth watching if you are a fan of the original or just a Bronson fan. Unfortunately, MGM might be remaking the film soon.
Driven to Kill (2009)
Steven Seagal is back in top form!
After a big number of DTV flops such as The Patriot (not to be confused with the Mel Gibson film of the same name), The Foreigner and Submerged, Steven Seagal comes up with Pistol Whipped, Regenade Justice (or Urban Justice) and this DTV flick that was better than I expected. Seagal plays a former Russian mobster who gets a call from his ex-wife about his daughter getting married, Seagal finds out that she is marrying the son of a mob boss that he worked for 20 years ago. Trouble starts when Seagal's daughter and ex-wife are left in the house, two men suddenly break in and killed them both. Once Seagal found out about this, he was DRIVEN TO KILL.
Even though the plot is pretty much the same as most of Seagal's other films, it's better than most of his recent films and he carried on getting better afterwards with The Keeper.
Worth a watch if you're a Seagal fan.
Sudden Impact (1983)
Go Ahead, Make My Day!
Clint Eastwood returns as Dirty Harry Calahan in the 4th movie of the Dirty Harry series. Clint is older but he's still got it, Harry was told to have a vacation after some trouble that happened because of a robbery (where the memorable "Make My Day" catchphrase comes from!) But the city he took a vacation was worse, a woman turned vigilante after a rape attack in a funfair and starts getting the punks one by one. The last movie to see Sandra Locke in a Clint Eastwood movie! An improvement after The Enforcer which was a bit more of a comedy and less serious. Clint Eastwood's sunglasses were Gargoyles which are best known for the sunglasses that are worn by Arnold Shwartzeneger in The Terminator. Worth a watch if you like Clint Eastwood, the Dirty Harry films or like action crime thrillers.
Bring Back... Star Trek (2009)
Interesting
When I started becoming a Star Trek fan (or Trekkie), I've heard about the new Star Trek movie which is a re-imagining like what Casino Royale did to the James Bond franchise. I watched this just to give me an idea of the history of the Star Trek saga and I thought it helped, Bring Back Star Trek was funny as well as interesting. Justin lee Colins goes to the US to look for the surviving cast of the original series including Leonard Nemoy. I would give it 10 stars but only 9 because William Shatner wouldn't talk to Justin but he might get fed up of all the trekkers after him! It's worth a watch if it comes on TV again, not sure if it will because Bring Back Star Wars didn't and I wanted to watch that.
Evil Dead II (1987)
Groovy!
This deserves more than 7.9 on here, Bruce Campbell is at his best as Ash. Definitely better than The Evil Dead (still worth a watch if you haven't seen it.) When I first watched this, I expected more of the same but it becomes more of a comedy that the Evil Dead films is best known for and I loved it ever since. Sam Raimi tried to make it less of an X rated by making the blood splatter coloured green, blue and a little bit of red added in (a little bit in evil dead standards) but still became an X rating. Surprisingly not a big success in the cinema (like the other evil dead films) but got a cult following which is no surprise.
If you're bored and have nothing to do, go and buy Evil Dead 2, it is worthy in your DVD collection!
The Evil Dead (1981)
One of the greatest horror movies ever made!
Became famous for being one of many films in the video nasty list in the UK during the 80s. If that didn't happen, it will probably be forgotten. Bruce Campbell as his best known role as Ash who has to protect himself from his friends who gets processed by the evil dead. Sam Raimi was 19 when he directed this, he made short films before including Within The Woods which was the short film which got him where he is now. (It is available to watch on Youtube but very bad condition.) It has all the elements of a classic horror movie including creepy music and atmopshere. If you liked The Evil Dead, you'll like Evil Dead 2 and Army Of Darkness (even though it's more on the comedy side.) If you liked these films, I recommend, the Re-Animator films, My Name Is Bruce, Bubba Ho Tep, Braindead, Bad Taste, Dawn Of The Dead, Jack Brooks Monster Slayer and Day Of The Dead.
Day of the Dead (1985)
Very good zombie classic!
Probably not as good as Dawn Of The Dead (which is probably the best zombie movie ever made) but it is still a good film otherwise. The special effects by Tom Savini were brilliant which always beats the gore of Hostel and Saw any day. I wasn't so sure if was going to be any good at first but when I watched it, I couldn't believe I haven't watched it before! It has been said to be the weakest but I think it's underrated. If you liked Dawn Of The Dead, you are in for a treat! I also recommend, Night Of The Living Dead, The Evil Dead films, Re-Animator, Zombie Flesh Eaters (Zombi 2, Zombie), The Living Dead At Manchester Morgue and 28 Days Later.
Troll 2 (1990)
I can smell an Oscar!
One of the funniest worst movies I've ever seen (and I thought The Incredible Melting Man was bad!) It is not related to the original Troll as the company who released this film renamed it to Troll 2 as the original title was Goblins. A family goes on a holiday trip to the town of Nilbog (Goblin backwards!) where it is not what it seems. There are no trolls in this movie, just goblins. It is currently a cult movie because of how bad it is and it was once IMDb's list of bad films as number 1! If you like movies that are so bad they're good, you'll love Troll 2! From the writer of Zombie Flesh Eaters 2 (Zombi 3). If you liked Troll 1, you might be a bit disappointed but there is one goblin at the beginning that looks a little bit like the troll from the first movie but without the eyes. It is definitely not an Oscar winner, it is a b movie and it's fun so if you have nothing to do, watch Troll 2 and have a good laugh!
The Burning (1981)
One of the better slasher films
The Burning is one of the best slasher films along with Halloween, Friday The 13th, Nightmare On Elm Street, Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Black Xmas, etc. It is a Friday The 13th rip-off but it's better than the later Friday The 13th films. The Burning is about a alcoholic caretaker named Cropsy who gets burnt in a prank that went wrong. After treatment in the hospital, Cropsy was set free because the hospital couldn't do anymore to cure the problem so Cropsy goes back to the camp and the horror begins there. The infamous raft scene is brilliant with special effects by Tom Savini (Friday The 13th and Dawn Of The Dead special effects). SPOILERS END HERE.
Banned in the UK as a video nasty only because the video company accidentally released it uncut as the BBFC had their own cut version of the film, it was re-released in the 90s in cut form by Vipco who was known to release Cannibal Holocaust and The Toolbox Murders. It was re-released (again) uncut by Vipco for a short time and never seen in the UK since. The only way for UK viewers to buy the DVD was on Ebay but now since MGM released a brilliant uncut DVD of the film, it is not as hard as it was. I should of waited longer for the MGM DVD but I couldn't wait for a Region 1 release and got a Dragon DVD of it.
Ah, well.
Django (1966)
Brilliant spaghetti western along with the Dollars trilogy!
It might not be as good as the Dollars trilogy but it's still a great spaghetti western with Franco Nero as a gunfighter known as Django who drags a coffin with him anywhere he goes. It obviously became a success in Italy as it has more than 30 sequels (only one sequel is official) Franco Nero only stars in 2 of them, some are good but can't beat the original and best. Django is also known for a scene where this guy's ear gets cut off and forced to eat it and got shot afterwards which is obviously an inspiration for the infamous ear scene in Reservoir Dogs (the idea for the music playing in the background was from The Good, The Bad and The Ugly.) Best recommended for fans of westerns, spaghetti westerns, Italian cinema or wonders where Quentin Tarantino got the idea of the ear scene for his Reservoir Dogs.
Per un pugno di dollari (1964)
One of the best spaghetti westerns!
Clint Eastwood's first big role as the man with no name (even though his name is Joe in this movie, Monco in For A Few Dollars More and Blondie in The Good, The Bad and The Ugly.) Brilliantly directed by Sergio Leone who got the story from the Japanese film Yojimbo and this story was also used for Last Man Standing and Django (another spaghetti western). Clint previously starred in B-movies before he went to star in this, Henry Fonda, James Coburn and Charles Bronson nearly got the man with no name role but they were not interested (Even though Charles Bronson played a similar role in Once Upon A Time In The West which is also directed by Sergio Leone.) If you liked this movie, you will also like the 2 sequels (obviously), High Plains Drifter and Pale Rider (both films star Clint as a very similar character and some video covers say that he plays the man with no name in them.) Other spaghetti westerns that are brilliant are the 2 sequels to this, Django, Django the B@st@rd, Death Rides A Horse and Once Upon A Time In The West.
Dirty Harry (1971)
Do I Feel Lucky?
Well do ya, punk? Clint Eastwood as Dirty Harry Calahan looking for a killer named Scorpio (Andy Robinson) who kidnapped a teenager. Clint Eastwood is at his best as Dirty Harry and Andy Robinson plays a great killer as if he was one! It's obviously the inspiration for action films like Die Hard and Lethal Weapon even though you get people saying that The French Connection was the inspiration (Bullitt was the inspiration for both Dirty Harry and The French Connection.)
If you liked Dirty Harry, you will also like the Dirty Harry sequels Magnum Force, The Enforcer, Sudden Impact, The Dead Pool. And if you liked those films, you will like The Rookie, The Gauntlet, Sledge Hammer!, Bullitt, The French Connection, Brannigan and you will probably like most of Clint's other films.
Why isn't Dirty Harry isn't on the top 250, I'll will never know.