Shaithis Reviews

Subspecies 4: Bloodstorm (1998)

Bloodstorm An Excellent Visit Back To The Subspecies Series

[10/10 · 14 January 2000]

Over six years ago I happened upon an unknown vampire series called Subspecies. I was shocked at how much I enjoyed them and have missed them ever since. Now, here is a way to revisit Romania and our favorite vampires portrayed by Denice Duff and Anders Hove.

Overall a classic. If you like Full Moon Pictures, a must see. If you've followed the Subspecies movies, ditto. If you are a fan of vampire movies double ditto.

The Exotic House of Wax (1997)

Good Story, Soft Core Porn

[6/10 · 14 January 2000]

Ever watch a porno and wonder 'man, if only they had a decent story to go along with it' ?

Well, that about sums it up with this movie. Basically a softcore porno by the guys at Surrender Cinema, it's pretty good.

Mind you, I like to watch tons of sex and nudity like the next guy, but I found myself fast forwarding past some of the long sex scenes because well, there's so many of them. But that give tribute to the fact that I wanted to see the story behind all the sex as well. Pretty good.

Castle Freak (1995 Video)

Good Movie, Missed Comb's Comedy

[7/10 · 14 January 2000]

I liked this movie. Directed by the same guy who did Re-Animator, From Beyond, and Fortress. Unfortunately like Bruce Campbell, I've come to expect a little bit of tongue in cheek comedy whenever I see a Jeff Combs movie. That wasn't there, it was just a serious movie.

Combs plays the father of a family of four. He has a drinking problem and has destroyed his family because of it. But an old unknown relative left him a castle and they all go to stay there and check it out. Unknown secrets of the family are discovered and it leads to the utmost horror. The 'freak' is horrifying, yet sad because of how he became such a freak.

Black Scorpion (1995 TV Movie)

Super Heroine To The Rescue!

[9/10 · 14 January 2000]

I'm a sucker for a decent superhero movie. (I'm not counting super bug budget, no storyline Batman's either)

A couple of my favorites are The Phantom and a budget movie called The Demolitionist. The Black Scorpion can be added to that collection.

If you've seen the Demolitionist then get this movie. It's basically a copy of that heroine. (It even stars the same guy in both movies)

If you haven't, then let me explain...a cop's father is murdered and she seeks vengeance. She laces up the black outfit (a sexy catwomanish, skimpy outfit that looks absolutely great on Joan Severance) and goes out to kick some booty.

It's a fun, action packed movie, mind you, you may not wish the kids to see it...without screening it first to see if you approve of the pretty graphic sex scene Severance has in it. Which in my opinion, was a bonus (alright, give it an extra star <grin>)

Assault of the Killer Bimbos (1988)

Assault Of The Killer Movie

[4/10 · 14 January 2000]

Brought to you by the same people who made 'Slave Girls From Beyond Infinity' and 'Sorority Babes In The Slime Ball Bowl-a-Rama'(of which I loved) this one wasn't up to par.

Elizabeth Kaitan (or Cayton, from the movie Slave Girls) is a co star in this flick that is kind of a Thelma and Louis b-movie. Two exotic dancers (bimbos) get framed for a murder by being bimbos (blatantly stupid). They hop in a car and partake in some adventures.

They meet up with surfer guys, gangsters, and cops. Pretty well getting chased around the highways until they finally get to Mexico.

The girls flaunt their sexy bodies and act totally like bimbos...I suppose the main idea for the movie. Absolutely nothing else happens in this movie.

I Spit on Your Grave (1978)

I Spit On Your Grave Lives Up To It's Expectations

[8/10 · 14 January 2000]

I remember reading a book by the PMRC's Tipper Gore back in the 80's that mentioned this movie. Mrs. Gore said that it is a blatant rape and violence movie. This was back when she wanted records and such rated.

Well, I was browsing though the DVD selection and saw that this movie was available. I picked it up for curiosity's sake.

What I got was what I expected. (If not more, most movies don't ever seem to live up to it's hype) Blatant Rape and Violence. It was actually quite disturbing. Something I won't pull out for my mother when she wants to watch a movie with me.

Mafia: An Exposé (1998 Video)

Informative Clips and Interviews

[4/10 · 13 January 2000]

This is a pretty good expose on the history of the Mafia. I am nowhere near an expert in such things, but this set interested me as I have read the occasional Mafia novel. The program goes through the history of how the Mafia came into existence. From Bonnie and Clyde to John Gotti it was pretty good.

The Blair Witch Project (1999)

Hyped To No End.

[7/10 · 13 January 2000]

I am afraid the Blair Witch Project has become a victim of it's own hype.

This film is in my opinion a refreshing burst of energy injected into the horror film. Something I haven't seen since 'The Evil Dead' came out.

Original and mysterious, this film pulled me along for the ride quite easily. Unfortunately I started to expect a little too much from this film because of all the talk about this film. I wanted and expected more.

It is a great film, but I am afraid it is not something I will be able to watch over and over again. It has been marketed to death and the hype surrounding it has annoyed me to the point where I would rather ignore this film for a while.

The Haunting (1999)

Effects Film Low On Any Type Of An Entertaining Story.

[2/10 · 13 January 2000]

I have yet to read Shirley Jackson's novel, something of which I've been meaning to do for quite sometime. I am sure it has got to be scarier than this film. I remember jumping once when I watched it the other day, although I cannot recall the scene.

The special effects are great and I watched this on DVD, but I am sure in the theatre it must have been an awesome sight. After the first few special effects are done with I was waiting for a story to develop.

I figured this movie at the least has to be loosely based on the classic novel, so a good story should be there, but it wasn't. I was relegated to staring at the gorgeous Catherine Zeta-Jones character throughout the movie basically because there was nothing much else to watch. Lili Talor was such a suck character. I did not like her one bit, something about whiny people. Also, the guy in this film reminded me of the cartoonish Dudley DoRight with his voice and face. I could not relate to the characters at all. Quigon, ahem Liam Neeson did an admirable job trying to get through this movie with some type of acting.

Half to three quarters of the way I was just dying to go see a campy Friday the 13th or a Scream Queenish film! At least there is some type of entertainment value. If there is no story there at least they fill it up with gory deaths or attractive females. This had nothing.

Soldier (I) (1998)

An Average Sci Fi Action Movie

[7/10 · 13 January 2000]

I love sci fi action movies. Totall Recall, Demolition Man, Judge Dredd, the list goes on. Soldier is no different.

The movie itself is nothing special, soldiers are raised from childhood to be tough. Kurt Russell though is good. I used to like it when the tough guy made smart ass comments, but now it is way overdone. I loved how he said so little, yet his face could tell it all. When he did speak during the film it made it all that more powerful and important.

Bordello of Blood (1996)

Crypt Campiness May Have Gone Past My Limit.

[7/10 · 13 January 2000]

Let me first start this off by saying any movie with Corey Feldman in it will automatically lose one star from me. That done let me repair that by saying any film with Erika Eleniak in it will receive one bonus star.

Tales From the Crypt's second feature is little more than a campy vampire tale. It is the tale of the Queen of the vampires 'Lillith' (erotically portrayed by the best looking redhead in film, Angie Everhart).

Dennis Miller, is his wise cracking self throughout this movie. I wondered whether there was a script or not for him, as he just kid of flows through the film with jokes in every second line..perhaps he adlibbed the whole thing. Well, his character is a hardluck P.I. whom happens across a lovely lady in distress, the ever so religious Erika Eleniak.

Eleniak's brother (Feldman) is missing. The cops are too overworked between meals so she decides to hire Miller. He finds out that her brother went to a vampire whorehouse.

Chris Sarandon who played a T.V. Reverend in this movie plays a confusing character to me. Sometimes he seems the Swaggarty Bakerish type of corrupt evangelist, sometimes he seems like a crusader for God. Hard to tell. Regardless he didn't have a major role in the film.

There is plenty of nudity in the film, and combined with Miller's and Everhart's (who looks gorgeous did I mention that...but could not tell a joke and act well) wisecracking made it a pretty campy affair. With all the nudity, they couldn't have shown it from one of the major stars like Eleniak or Everhart?? Come on Cryptkeeper get with it!

It surprised me the way the Tales From the Crypt people have gone, especially after Demon Knight.

It was cute seeing William Sadler return for a cameo.

Tales from the Crypt: Demon Knight (1995)

The Cryptkeeper goes Hollywood.

[10/10 · 13 January 2000]

I tell ya, after getting through the first scenes in the movie I thought this was going to be THE film. A new classic.

Well, it just turned out to be an intro and had nothing to do with the actual movie. What we get to see is a story called 'Demon Knight'. Billy Zane, is excellent, a funny yet bad demon who throughout time has been chasing Brayker (William Sadler).

Brayker is the carrier of a relic which has been hidden from these demons since the beginning. So far, they have been successful at warding off the demons, but he is now trapped in this small town's seedy hotel.

The movie started out great with an excellent car chase and an amazing soundtrack (Filter's Hey Man Nice Shot). It's one of the best soundtracks I have ever owned.

Then the movie begins to fall into a lull. Stuck in a hotel, Sadler and the rest of the guests and staff defend the hotel from the inside...trying to keep the demons on the outside.

Flashbacks throughout time like the death of Christ and one of the World Wars were great. But if only that could have been more used and developed.

Still a pretty good horror movie, mainly the only drawback was the fact that it was relegated to a typical horror movie when it could have been something great.

Judge Dredd (1995)

A Fun Film For Sci-Fi Action Lovers

[7/10 · 13 January 2000]

While Judge Dredd may not be a classic movie, it is a fun action sci fi movie ala Demolition Man and Total Recall.

Sylvester Stallone plays a great Judge Dredd and Diane Lane is as good as ever. This is a film about a comic book by the way, so take it as a fun film, not Ghandi or Lawrence of Arabia!

The Crow (1994)

As Cool As Superheroes Can Get.

[8/10 · 13 January 2000]

I do not read comics so I have never even seen a Crow comic book. I first heard of this movie when Brandon Lee's death was in the news. I was sort of sickened that they would even attempt to finish this movie without him.

So I didn't jump the gun and see this movie in the theatres until very late. To my surprise it was a great movie that had an excellent cast, and an excellent soundtrack.

Brandon Lee's scenes are moving, perhaps more so when in the back of your mind you know this was his last film. After seeing the finished product I feel it was well done in good taste.

Army of Darkness (1992)

A Classic Movie, Give Us Some More Sugar Baby.

[10/10 · 13 January 2000]

I hope director Sam Raimi is not finished with the Evil Dead series. Sure his Hercules and Xena Warrior Princess shows are doing great, but nothing is quite like his Evil Dead Series.

Army of Darkness takes us to medieval times (a continuation of where Evil Dead 2 left off) where Ash has become known as the promised one who will rid the people of this time of all the dead that have risen from the grave.

This film was called 'Army Of Darkness' because this was the first Evil Dead movie that had a wide theatrical release. They didn't want movie goers skipping it because they hadn't seen the previous two. It does stand by itself, but I would recommend following the whole series. They changed the beginning of this film a bit from the ending of the Evil Dead 2. Where in Evil Dead 2 Ash falls through the rip in time, and is instantly saluted as the promised one, he is now thought to be an enemy. He has to prove himself to the population first. Unfortunate, but I'm sure it made a better storyline.

The rest of the movie is a classic horror/comedy. Sam Raimi has invented an entire new genre with the Evil Dead series. It's a fun movie that has clever little things inside. For instance the chant 'Klaatu Verada Nicto' taken from The Day The Earth Stood Still. H. P. Lovecraft's Necronomicon, and copies of Fangoria magazine are all little things that made this movie fun for me.

This is the American version however, and was altered. The main difference was the ending. The ending was too depressing for U.S. audiences according to the movie studios, so they changed it. That is unfortunate. Hopefully they will release the international version.

Day of the Dead (1985)

Nobody Does Zombies Like Romero.

[9/10 · 13 January 2000]

Day Of The Dead is the third in a series of zombie films by George Romero. The other two previous films were Night Of The Living Dead (the classic) and Dawn Of The Dead.

This one is about an underground group of scientists and military who are researching and trying to survive in an Earth that has been taken over by zombies.

There have never been any zombie films better than their creator, George Romero.

Dracula: Prince of Darkness (1966)

Dracula Prince Of Darkness A Different Treat

[13 January 2000]

Hammer is very well known in the horror industry as being the great horror film company who churned out tons of pictures in the 60's. I for one had never seen a true Hammer Studios movie until this one. Dracula - Prince Of Darkness is supposedly a sequel to Horror Of Dracula. I have not seen that either. It starts out in the beginning with a bunch of clips from that movie though. After that is through the real film starts.

This one pits Dracula against four travellers. Two brothers and their wives. The four travellers from England are travelling through the Carpathians when they become stranded. Lo and behold a carriage with no driver arrives and quickly whisks them away to Castle Dracula.

This sets the stage for an entertaining movie indeed. This being my Hammer Studios introduction I have never seen how they have destroyed and brought back to life (or unlife) Dracula. The way they bring Drac back is similar to they way Jason was brought back in the Friday the 13th movies, but remember, this was in the 60's pre-Jason. The ending however was fresh indeed a way we all knew Dracula could be ended. Interesting, and enough action and story to go along for the ride. Suzan Farmer was excellent as the innocent young wife. Christopher Lee played a great Dracula. If you are a classics fan, or Dracula fan this is a must see. Some of the things in the story are just too good to miss.

Warlock III: The End of Innocence (1999 Video)

A Tale of Witchcraft And Warlocks.

[8/10 · 11 January 2000]

One movie I was not too fond of was Warlock featuring an actor I really couldn't stand...Warlock featuring Julian Sands. It was quite a predictable, if not quite boring film.

One day, I'm not sure if I saw it on a pay-tv channel or what, but I watched Warlock: Armageddon. I really thought it was neat, original, and especially smart. So when I saw yet another sequel, I was hesitant, but picked it up anyways.

What I received was not as original as Armageddon, but it did have its entertainment value. I remember long ago when Witchboard had the same effect, but it did not hold up over time, and I can't say I think this one will either.

The creators of this film have done a wonderful job on what looks like a not too huge direct-to-video budget. A major selling point was the presence of 'Hellraiser's' Ashley Laurence (I'm a sucker for a cute tough girl that can defeat demons) as I have not seen her in anything since 'The Lurking Fear'. Once again, in typical Ashley Laurence fashion she's the main chased after girl who must defeat the demon (or shall we say warlock).

Bruce Payne grew on me through the film. At first I must admit I even thought Julian Sands would be better. But his calm demeanour really intensified the scenes and gave some nice atmosphere.

The film, yes is quite a stereotypical one. But it did have interesting elements placed in it. I really liked the druid aspect that Armageddon brought, and while it isn't really showcased in this film, there is a good witch, and a nice young aspiring good witch that try to battle the Warlock. Unfortunately it is in a minimal amount of the film.

A group of friends, all of different stereotypes (one is a musician, another an artist, a witch, a kinky sex kitten, and a kinky muscled possible ahem jockish-type character?) head to an old house which is scheduled to be demolished. Ashley Laurence, whom in this film is an orphan, never knew her birth parents. It is their old house. What follows is your basic what has happened in the past will now repeat in the future. It is only up to this small group of friends to stop it (and whatever clues and artefacts are found around the house).

I recommend this film to anyone who likes mild witchcrafty-type horror films for a light viewing. It's not like the other Warlock films have been Shakespeare, and this one is the same.

Modern Vampires (1998 TV Movie)

Blatantly Takes From Innocent Blood.

[5/10 · 11 January 2000]

I suppose I had hoped for too much. I'm into the comedic/horror genre and love cult films as well. After reading the rave reviews on this and other sites, I quickly snatched this one up.

Kim Cattral is the only good thing in this film she is genuinely funny, as is Udo Kier. But Wagner and Van Dien are a bore to watch.

Three quarters of the way through this film (about the time I had seen their version of 'Dracula' a little too often) I was starting to get genuinely peeved at how much they seem to have taken/stolen from Innocent Blood. Needless to say Natasha Wagner is no where near as sexy and talented as Anne Parillaud.

Another vampire film to add to my collection, unfortunately.

A Nightmare on Elm Street 4: The Dream Master (1988)

Following A Classic Is Hard To Do.

[8/10 · 11 January 2000]

As much as I dislike sequels, I have to admit I loved Part III Dream Warriors, and think of it as the best in the series.

So how do you follow up something that is regarded as a classic? Just carry it on I suppose. Luckily they got some of the previous cast in Dream Warriors and had them in this one. The neat part of this story is the slight comparisons to Alice in Wonderland.

Freddy of course needs new children to kill. As was established in previous films, he finds an Elm street child to get them for him. Alice, the unwilling recipient of this honour is terrified that she is practically killing off her friends by pulling them in to her dreams. At first, she looks tired and scared like other teens in the previous films. But something changes in her after each friend of hers that Freddy kills.

Eventually this leads to a pretty good showdown. I like this movie. If they have to do yet another sequel, this one was good.

A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors (1987)

Wes Craven and Heather Langenkamp Come Back For The Attack.

[10/10 · 11 January 2000]

I never thought of Wes Craven as the god of horror directing. You could have fooled me though when I saw the difference between Nightmares I, II, and III! Nightmare I of course was the original concept, II being some shoddy remake/sequel of the first (not made by Craven), and III is well basically a classic!

Dream Warriors came out at the time when Heavy Metal music was popular to mix in with horror movies (i.e. Trick or Treat, Friday The Thirteenth, etc.). The song Dream Warriors by Dokken became a hit and pushed the film in the theatres (the film helped Dokken's sales too), even though it wasn't really showcased in the movie much.

Nancy returns as a dream specialist (clever don't you think?) and runs into the Elm Street children. Events begin occurring that look too familiar to her and she vows to help them. The key part to this story is that each child has their own power in their dreams. One is a Magician, another super strong and it goes from there. Using all their skills combined together they try to fight Freddy...the Dream Warriors.

Patricia Arquette, yet another unknown actress (remember Johnny Depp in Nightmare I?), is brilliant in her role. Her power in the film makes her the most important child in the film.

Freddy is at his best in this picture. By now his fright has waned because of all the one-liners we have heard in the previous Nightmare film. Unlike future films though, the balance of comedic relief and horror is never broken. It fits like a glove!

My favorite in this series, the music, actors, and story will always be a classic to me.

A Nightmare on Elm Street 2: Freddy's Revenge (1985)

The Start of Sequel-Mania.

[6/10 · 11 January 2000]

You knew it had to happen. A Nightmare on Elm Street could have went down in history as a great horror movie, but no, they had to rape the success of the first original concept and make sequel after sequel, practically making it as cheap as the Halloween and Friday the 13th films. Of course some of the upcoming sequels (i.e. Dream Warriors) are really good, but why bother? Why not just make new and interesting horror films? Not these cheap sequels that just carry on the story over and over again. Or worse, just re-tells the exact same story, just changing minimal bits.

That's what Freddy's Revenge, A Nightmare on Elm Street Part II does. Instead of getting nice Heather Langenkamp (Nancy in Part I), we get Mark Patton as Jesse Walsh. A nice enough guy sure. But as the lead character? He couldn't hold the main role in this movie, perhaps if they got Johnny Depp back for this one it may have been better. Even the actress Kim Myers as Lisa Webber doesn't get much sympathy for me. At times in the film she did. When she was worrying about Jesse in the beginning and didn't really understand this 'Freddy' character, I really liked her. The film gets silly after that.

This film is does set one Freddy myth in motion though. It is the fact that Freddy needs someone to bring him his victims. A scene that has it's redeeming value is the bus scene. Effects can't save this movie though as after watching it yet again I have the feeling that this was just one of those cheap direct to video releases. What makes it worse is that it wasn't.

A Nightmare on Elm Street (1984)

Great Chemistry Between Actors In Nightmare.

[9/10 · 11 January 2000]

The film that started it all...and this was no comic Freddy either. Freddy's introduction to the world was as dark as his past. He didn't crack a joke in every appearance...he killed!

The first Nightmare film was original. Others will copy this format over and over again...including Mr. Craven himself (Shocker). Heather Langenkamp, Amanda Wyss and Johnny Depp were great unknown actors in this film. You can't really cast any better for this type of film. It was also great to see horror great John Saxon reappear on the screen.

The chemistry flows nicely throughout the film. At times, Langenkamp seems to be talking to herself and not the actor she is supposed to, but overall it's one great scare. Wyss played a great sexy little friend of Langenkamp's and her scene-stealing death scene is one of the greatest of all time. The fact that when you were hurt in your dreams, you were hurt in real life has opened the imagination for many. While it may not be totally original (H.P. Lovecraft's dreamland's novels used this to a limited degree), it did introduce it to a wide audience.

On such a limited budget, Craven and his group did a wonderful job keeping the effects realistic and the story great!

Virtual Encounters (1996)

Average Surrender Cinema Movie

[5/10 · 12 December 1998]

As my second Surrender Cinema flick I was looking forward to seeing Virtual Encounters. Not only do I love Elizabeth Cayton (Slave Girls From Beyond Infinity) but I had just seen The Exotic House Of Wax by Surrender Cinema, and aside from it being an outright soft core porno, it had an interesting storyline between the sex as well.

Not so with Virtual Encounters. While it was nice to see the expected sex scenes aplenty in this movie, there was no story whatsoever.

Kaitan hooks herself up to the Virtual Reality machine and it shows her all types of sexual pleasures. They try and develop Kaitan's character as a shy woman who isn't comfortable with her sexuality. As a result, her relationship is suffering. Her boyfriend gives her the gift of Virtual Reality and she loves it.

A so-so movie I would watch the Exotic House Of Wax instead.

Cherry 2000 (1987)

Love-Robot movie could have gone somewhere but doesn't.

[4/10 · 9 December 1998]

Cherry 2000 is classic model of a love robot in the near future. When Sam Treadwell's short circuits, he is devastated.

He searched for a replacement Cherry (he kept the data chip to place in the new one) but finds that there are none.

Finally he is tipped off that there is one in Zone 7 (a Mad Maxish Wasteland area of the USA).

Sam hires a tracker (Melanie Griffith) to help him retrieve this Cherry model. On his way are a bunch of confrontations with evil and wacko characters that try to stop them.

While this movie has the elements that Mad Max had it comes nowhere near the excitement of the action scenes. The Cherry 200 love robot is funny though.