doorloblin Reviews

House of Flying Daggers (2004)

Unlikeable Characters and Awful Dialogue Hold Back Visually Stunning Movie

[5/10 · 22 December 2019]

I was excited to watch this film after watching HERO (2002), which is an amazing film. I honestly can hardly believe the same director made Hero and House of Flying Daggers. In Hero the action is excellent, but what really stands out is the way the story is told. In House of Flying Daggers, the action scenes are lackluster and lame. They also have little to no music to accompany them, which makes them less intense. The choreography is bad in about 85% of the fighting. Now getting into the story. The characters are so insanely unlikeable. You should be on the protagonists side in a story, but the girl is a fake, sleazy woman who just leads the male characters on and obviously has no real love for anyone, although you are supposed to think she does. As for the male character, at the beginning he is drunk and attempts to rape the lead woman. 10 minutes later he is rescuing her from prison and she just doesn't mind that he tried to rape her. At the end of the movie you find out she has fallen in love with him. He is cocky, arrogant, just overall a bad person, and once again, tried to rape her. And this movie is supposed to be romantic. The dialogue is poorly written and laughably bad. I just don't understand why this film is considered romantic, or even just a good film at all

Star Wars: The Rise Of Skywalker (2019)

Redeems a Struggling Franchise

[9/10 · 20 December 2019]

The Force Awakens was flawed but still overall enjoyable and good. Rogue One was also a pretty dang good film. Then Solo and The Last Jedi happened. Solo was a good idea with very poor execution, and The Last Jedi is a disaster. I will say people take their hate for TLJ way too far. But anyways, the franchise was struggling. Then they made this film, The Rise of Skywalker. Mind blown. This film is shocking (in a good way), visually stunning, very well written (especially compared to other non-original trilogy Star Wars movies) and overall just a very thrilling and satisfying conclusion to the Saga. One reason TLJ was bad was the dialogue. The dialogue was pretty terrible. In TROS, the dialogue is a big step up. Still not the most talented dialogue writing EVER, but the failed attempts at humor and cheesy remarks are almost completely gone. The action is great and exciting. The film offers a very satisfying conclusion to the Skywalker saga. It is a very fitting end. As for critic reviews, they don't like it because of the fan service. But guess what, fans are going to really appreciate and even love the fan service. It sounds like they are just kissing up to fans after TLJ, but if you think about it thats kind of what a good franchise writer would do. They hear complaints and fix it to make it enjoyable, and pays homage and mimics the tone of the best installments in the series. All I can say to summarize that is that The Rise of Skywalker is awesome, and ends the saga very well

Take Shelter (2011)

A Beautiful Masterpiece

[10/10 · 17 December 2019]

This film is one of the best films ever made. Its slow but the script and directing makes it work. The emotional depth of the characters is amazing. The story is wonder, and the feel of the whole movie is dream like but also creepy. The director said it was inspired by a free floating anxiety he felt in society at the time, and watching this film you can see what he means. I have a hard time describing the beauty of this film, but it is essential viewing for any cinema lover.

The Visit (I) (2015)

Pay no attention to bad reviews

[9/10 · 23 November 2019]

This film is brilliant. It is very unnerving but also has humor in the right moments. The sister can be a little annoying but this is easily overlooked but the brother is a funny and good character. There is also one really good scene that completely caught me off guard, which rarely happens. I am also not usually a big fan of the found footage format, but it was done really well. I love pretty much all of Shyamalan's work, but those who don't will consider this a return to fine form for Shyamalan

Gravity Falls (2012–2016)

Not Just A Kids Disney Show

[9/10 · 17 November 2019]

This could have been on another channel. It really is so surprising that this is a Disney show. More teens and adults like this show than kids. Because its really not a kids show. Sure, its stupidly goofy sometimes, but the humor is actually brilliant. And the story it slowly develops is amazing, dark, sad, and captivating. So no, this is not a kids show. Its a brilliant, goofy, weird, dark, amazing story for any teen and up looking for something unique and awesome

The X-Files (1993–2018)

A SciFi Masterpiece

[10/10 · 12 November 2019]

Before I get into the review, let me say while the revival (seasons 10 and 11) are entertaining, they are not great nor do they live up to the original show. You can tell Chris Carter, while the creator of a brilliant show, never had a set plan for the show and just tried to make it last long as possible. Now, for seasons 1-9 (the original). This show is absolutely fantastic. Very innovative for the time and still holds up today. I also am absolutely 100% certain you will never find a cable show with better characters and character writing. Mulder and Scully are brilliant. Our society also could learn a few things from them. They rarely see eye to eye but still respect and care for each other. Like most shows with over 200 episodes there are a few bad ones (2 max a season, with 20-24 episodes a season). Scary, cool, and engaging, this show is amazing. Worth a watch. Season 9 is a little bumpy, but thats alright, and not even really the showrunners fault. A major actor left and they had not even planned to do seasons 6-9 (but Fox made them, as it was to popular). Season 9 is still good, and I would say its ok to not even ever watch seasons 10 and 11, even though they are still ok. The original show at least is brilliant and awesome. Well acted, and once again, insanely good characters. Such an awesome show. Shame the newer seasons brought its IMDb rating down some

Terminator Genisys (2015)

Not perfect, but fun and has the right spirit

[7/10 · 5 November 2019]

I do not understand the terrible reviews for this film. Arnold is back. The charm is back. The cool action is back. And so is Sarah Connor. It would have been better if it was Linda Hamilton, but Clarke still did great. Cool terminators. This film really brings back the spirit of T1-3 after the disaster that is Terminator: Salvation. This film is cool and really earns its spot in the Terminator franchise. It aint as good as the first two, but that doesn't mean it aint good. Good movie, worth a watch

Terminator Salvation (2009)

Abandons the Vision of T1-3

[4/10 · 5 November 2019]

This movie would have made a good stand alone film, but it is not a good terminator film. Heck, it doesn't have the feel of a terminator film at all. The charm is gone. Arnold is gone. And while Christain Bale is a great actor, he was not a good choice for John. It just doesn't have that same fun, charming, action style like the first two films, and even the third. The grit and brown color just doesn't fit.

Hostiles (2017)

A Western Masterpiece

[9/10 · 24 October 2019]

If you are looking for a typical shoot-out style action packer western movie, you won't like this film. HOSTILES is a modern masterpiece, due many thing, such as the story and even the visuals, which are breathtaking. But what truly makes this film special is the characters. It is rare that a movie feature such well written character development. Blocker is said to have done some bad things, some of which he thinks is justified. But he also show deep compassion and character at other times. As for Rosalee's character, I suggest you just watch the movie. Near perfect film

The Captive (I) (2014)

Smart thriller at times but in poor taste at others

[4/10 · 7 September 2019]

Some things should be left out of movies. Movies should not depict some things for entertainment, even if it is meant to be disturbing. Its still meant to be entertaining. Pedophiles should not be depicted or talked about as much as this movie does. Some of the dialogue about it, even though spoken by cops doing their jobs, is so revolting. I know pedophiles exist and disturbing things like this movie happen, but it should be left out of fictional movies. Mostly in poor taste

The Office: Mrs. California (2011) Season 8, Episode 9

Robert is terrible

[2/10 · 25 August 2019]

He is usually tolerable but in this episode he is insanely infuriating. I can barely watch this episode. Only good thing is Dwight. But Robert sucks. He makes no sense and is an idiot.

The Wandering Earth (2019)

Good visuals and story, but please, PLEASE, get the sister to shut up

[7/10 · 31 July 2019]

The visuals are AMAZING and the story is interesting, with entertaining action sequences. However the main protagonist is annoying and poorly written, with an idiotic and brainless grudge against his father. And as for his sister, all she does is wails and cries and whines. It. Is. So. Fricking. Annoying. But overall the movie is worth a watch

X-Men: Dark Phoenix (2019)

EASILY the best X-Men movie

[8/10 · 9 June 2019]

Why is this movie getting so much hate? It, simply, is amazing. The story is just about as good as any other super hero movie, but the characters, action, pacing, acting, and effects are amazing. The only problem is the one comment made by Raven about changing the name to X-Women, because according to her the women are always saving the men. Typical bs line to stay politically correct. I won't spoil anything, but the women 100% do NOT do all the saving. BS political comment

Gremlins (1984)

Cheesy, Stupid, Fun Movie

[9/10 · 7 June 2019]

This movie is so dumb and corny but its so funny and its just a fun movie to watch. Darkly hilarious at times and funny because of the effects at others. Lots of fun to watch, just an enjoyable mindless movie. An essential 80s movie. I love this movie.

Eraserhead (1977)

A disturbing and jumbled pile of crap

[1/10 · 23 May 2019]

No real plot, only moody visuals that truly disturb you. There is no character development or real plot, hardly any dialogue. People call this art and surrealism but in reality its a poor movie made by a want-to-be film maker who had no what idea what he was doing, and since he couldn't come up with any real story he decided to make it as bizarre as possible to distract people from its stupidity. And its excused as "art." Steer clear. It haunts you and not in a "oh that was eerie but beautiful" type way. Its just uncomfortable to watch. So don't.

2001: A Space Odyssey (1968)

How do people like this garbage

[2/10 · 16 May 2019]

Boring, stupid, and mind-numbing. (This isnt a spoiler because this is how the movie starts) The opening scene with the people in ape costumes is so ridiculous. Its like 20 minutes long and its literally ape walking around and grunting. Why could they not have found that monolith in 5 minutes instead of a stupid 20 minute scene. Its so bad and cheesy. The effects are terrible (however this is from 1968 so it doesn't really matter) but people say its a visually stunning movie. Its not. I have no idea what was happening story wise, because the movie is poorly written. And could someone please get the classical music to stop playing?! When it goes on as long as it did it is just distracting and annoying. Its stupid to rant about this but as a big movie fan I am insulted that people say this is a great movie. This film doesn't inspire awe, it inspires me to turn off the TV

Gladiator (2000)

For a bloody Rome set movie its really boring

[4/10 · 16 May 2019]

The fight scenes are good, but thats about it. Story is good in theory but the movie is drawn out I had a hard time watching the whole thing. I wish I could describe why I don't like it better, but all I can say is thats ITS SO BORING. I watch a ton of movies, I love movies. And because of this I hate seeing all the reviews that say this is one of the best movies ever.

The Village (2004)

Beautiful film suffered from poor marketing

[10/10 · 14 May 2019]

This movie is amazing. Its so emotionally gripping and overall a beautiful film. It has its creepy moments and the story keeps you hooked. The critics are wrong, this is an amazing film, Shyamalan at his best. And the excellent soundtrack adds even more beauty to the film. And this review is coming from a person who usually likes over the top action movies. THIS IS NOT A SPOILER: The twist at the end is thoughtful, not a cheap shock. Critics only dislike it because of the "dissapointing" twist, which is a shame. Shyamalan made two movies with a twist, and critics started to expect it. I love the ending. Last thing, this is not a horror movie. It has a few creepy moments, but it is more of a drama. I think some people don't like it because they expected a horror movie and its not.

Us (II) (2019)

Creepy but dumb

[7/10 · 14 May 2019]

This movie is fun to watch, and creepy. However its not near as scary as people say, and the "hands across america" statement at the end is stupid, illogical, and pointless. So now that the tethered are free, they are just gonna stand in a line and hold hands? So dumb. And how did they kill EVERYONE? They have scissors. What about the army? And if the military is still around, which they are logically, they could easily wipe out a bunch of people with scissors. I am NOT racist, the fact that some people are is sickening. But the political messages about it are pointless in a horror movie.

Poltergeist (1982)

Its sad some people think this is scary

[2/10 · 14 May 2019]

This is not a horror film. I understand its from the early 80s and therefore dated, but that doesn't mean its scary just because it was a "horror" movie when it came out. I laughed out loud multiple times during an "intense" scene. If you think this is scary you have never seen anything but a kids movie

The Dark Crystal (1982)

Proof puppets shouldn't be a thing

[1/10 · 13 May 2019]

Its so bad. Everything looks terrible, the voice acting is weird, the evil characters don't seem evil, they are just stupid. The pacing is awful, the plot laughable, and overall the movie is so cringe inducing. But this is my opinion, and I know most people like this movie

The Silence (II) (2019)

BASED ON A BOOK FROM 2015!!!!

[8/10 · 21 April 2019]

This movie is excellent. And there has been backlash because of the similarities between this and A Quiet Place, bu this is based on a book that was published in 2015. I though the acting was really good and the writers made you care about the characters

Brain Games: Peer Pressure (2015) Season 5, Episode 8

screw this episode

[1/10 · 6 April 2019]

One day when short people rule the world we will cut off every talls persons legs and laugh at them

Kona (2017 Video Game)

Chilling Adventure Game

[8/10 · 10 February 2019]

No that wasn't supposed to be a pun. Anyways, the game is really fun. Great spooky atmosphere and mystery. The other thing is that there are puzzles, but the game has a way at guiding you through them. Very good game

Alien (1979)

Entertaining, not scary at all

[8/10 · 31 January 2019]

Its more wondering what is going to happen, but lots of people say this film is scary. Its not. Not at all. Creepy atmosphere, yes. But scary, no. It is however a cool story and the set design is the coolest scifi design I have ever seen. Its worth a watch.