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- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonShelley LongRhea PerlmanSam refuses to accept Diane's reconsideration of his proposal, and brags to her about a romantic weekend he has planned in Cape Cod. Diane follows him down there, and Sam doesn't want her to know that his date had to leave early.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonShelley LongNicholas ColasantoWhen Sam publicly supports an old teammate who has come out of the closet, Norm and the gang are afraid that "Cheers" will become a "gay bar."
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanThe bar's jukebox is temporarily going in for repairs, and for the week while it's away, Cheers gets a karaoke machine in it's place. After an initial reluctance by the gang as to it's usefulness, they take to the machine. In particular, Norm and Cliff are hooked on the song Lollipop - especially while sung with helium filled voices - while Frasier is hooked on every other song as he monopolizes the karaoke machine's time. Meanwhile, Robin will be getting out of jail in three days, and through the delivery of a white rose and a love letter, proposes to Rebecca and wants to get married on the day of his release. She's ecstatic - at least initially. Rebecca holes up in her apartment leading up to the wedding. She's living on booze and cigarettes. In a heart to heart with Sam and to herself, she finally admits that she doesn't think she loves Robin. She'll figure out what she needs to do once she sobers up.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonShelley LongNicholas ColasantoCoach is distressed when his sweet but insecure daughter introduces him to her boorish, obnoxious fiancé.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanFrasier is feeling pressured by Lilith to get married, and he doesn't like it. He wants to be the man in the relationship and make the decisions. But this relationship is the first one he's ever had where he does feel sexually desirable in an animalistic sense, and wants to know what that may feel like with another woman. Norm, Cliff, Tim and Alan convince him that Rebecca has the hots for him, and Cliff even manages to get Rebecca to inadvertently give Frasier that impression. The questions become whether Frasier will decide to pursue Rebecca, which means dumping Lilith, and if he does what both Rebecca and Lilith's reactions will be. Meanwhile, the power struggle between Sam and Rebecca at the bar continues, the biggest bone of contention being who's photograph should hang in the bar: the ex-bar owner and pseudo-celebrity Sam or the current bar manager Rebecca.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanSam and Woody make a bet that they can kiss Rebecca before midnight.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanRebecca is going to be on a consumer reports show as she wrote a letter to them complaining about an electronic depilatory that ripped off her skin when she shaved her legs. Rebecca is looking forward to exposing the crooked company that makes the product. Meanwhile, Carla feels that the return of Darryl Mead - her fantasy Red Sox player - to Cheers is a sign that she's ready to date again, the first time after Eddie's death. When she and Darryl head off on their date, all Carla sees is Eddie LeBecs everywhere she goes. She figures that Eddie is haunting her since he doesn't want her to date. When she makes an announcement that she will not date, even more Eddies appear. Eddie is haunting her for more than just not wanting her to date. Since she can't figure out why, she, Frasier and Lilith all decide that she needs professional help. Frasier and Lilith are thinking about her seeing one of their colleagues, whereas Carla is instead thinking about a visit to her psychic, Madame Lazora. Frasier is appalled not only that Carla would confide in Madame Lazora, but that Madame Lazora's business even exists. Madame Lazora holds a séance in the bar to conjure up Eddie. Through that séance, Madame Lazora ends up telling Carla why Eddie is haunting her, which is no surprise to an exasperated Frasier.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonShelley LongRhea PerlmanWhen Sam goes away on vacation, he chooses Woody to be boss at the bar. Woody is prepared to do so, but unprepared for the Dear John letter he receives from Beth. Wanting to explain in person, Beth and her fiancé, Leonard Twilley - who Woody knows - plan on stopping in Boston on their way to Niagara Falls. Although Woody is sad, he is more fearful of looking pitiful in Beth's eyes by not having his own girl on his arms. Seeing that Beth and Leonard's stopover is a short one, Diane thinks that making up a girlfriend for Woody is not a bad idea. However Beth and Leonard's stopover is a bit longer than either Diane or Woody thought, and Beth suggests that they, including Woody's girlfriend, go out for dinner. As a last resort, Woody picks a name out of Sam's little black book - Desiree Harrison - who, according to Sam "is the best" and has multiple stars next to her name. When Desiree comes to the bar at the appointed time, she is not what quite Woody expects.
- DirectorAndy AckermanStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanRebecca and the company are forcing Woody to take a vacation, something he has not done since he's started working at Cheers. The company is sending him to Italy, and he's not happy about it. But he goes. He ends up having a great vacation, but... Meanwhile, Lilith is well into her pregnancy and is becoming the stereotypical Earth Mother. Frasier is embarrassed by the way she's acting. However he changes his tune when he listens to the baby's heartbeat for the first time. He then becomes Earth Father. As part of this revelation, the Cranes relinquish the materialism of their lives and decide to live solely off the land out in the wilderness in a cabin Frasier intends to build. Realizing that they are true urbanites, Sam convinces them to try it for a week in a friend's cabin first before making up their minds for good. This pilot project shows them where geographically their hearts truly lie.
- DirectorRod HolcombStarsRichard HatchDirk BenedictLorne GreeneApollo crashes on the Wild West like planet Equellus after being pursued by four Cylon fighters. Taken in by a widow named Vella and her son Puppis, Apollo takes on crime boss La Certa and Red-Eye, a Cylon centurion turned formidable gunfighter who killed Vella's husband Martin.
- DirectorDaniel HallerStarsRichard HatchDirk BenedictLorne GreeneSilver Spar Squadron is overtaken by a Ship of Lights and subsequently disappears. Investigating a red planet, Apollo, Starbuck and Sheba find a crashed starship and a lone survivor, the mysterious Count Iblis. After Sheba takes him on a tour of the Galactica and other ships in the fleet, the charismatic Count offers to perform three miracles of the Colonial's choosing if they will surrender leadership of the fleet to him.
- DirectorRod HolcombStarsRichard HatchDirk BenedictLorne GreeneApollo and Starbuck come across a vessel they think may have come from Earth and take it aboard the Galactica. On board are two adults and four children in a state of suspended animation. Adama disagrees with the Council of Twelve about opening the sleeping chambers, for that may mean endangering the humans within. When the adult male, Michael, wakes up, he finds it difficult to breath the air on board the Galactica. Apollo, Starbuck and Cassiopea decide to escort the Lunar Shuttle Avion to its destination, hoping to find out if the travelers home, Terra, may be related to the planet Earth.
- DirectorRon SatlofStarsKent McCordBarry Van DykeRobyn DouglassDr. Zee describes his dreams which reveal the fate of Starbuck and his link to the lost pilot.
- DirectorRod HolcombStarsRichard HatchDirk BenedictLorne GreeneWhen an old con meets Starbuck and suggests he is the warrior's father, there proves to be more following the elder than family ties.
- DirectorChristian I. Nyby IIStarsRichard HatchDirk BenedictLorne GreeneWhen a large number of Colonial Warriors come down with a serious infection, Apollo and Starbuck must train a number of female shuttle pilots to fly Vipers for combat duty.
- DirectorBarry CraneStarsKent McCordBarry Van DykeRobyn DouglassThe planet's future hangs in the balance when Troy and Dillon alert Galactica that they are pursuing two enemy Cylons bent on commandeering a powerful New York City broadcasting facility to transmit earth's location to their hostile forces in space, which could lead to the destruction of Earth on "Galactica 1980".
- DirectorSigmund Neufeld Jr.StarsKent McCordBarry Van DykeRobyn DouglassWhen three of the children Troy and Dillon brought to Earth get sick after drinking some water from a lake. The doctor who treats them says that the water was polluted with a toxic waste which was dumped by a corporation. The doctor says there's nothing he can do for them but Troy asks him to keep alive because he plans to call the Galactica for help. When Dr. Zee learns of what happened he decides to go to Earth himself, which Adama objects to. But Zee insists and goes.
- DirectorSidney HayersStarsKent McCordBarry Van DykeRobyn DouglassAfter years of searching for Earth, the Galactica finds Earth. Adama would like to land but a child prodigy named Dr. Zee advises Adama against it because he believes that if they do that the Cylons will attack the Earth. So it's decided to send men to go to Earth and to make contact with people who won't treat them as a threat and whom they can ask to help introduce technology that could help the Earth stand up to a possible Cylon attack. Boxey who is now an adult and a warrior who goes by the name Troy, and another warrior Dillon are sent to North America to make contact with a scientist who believes in life beyond the Earth. But they are mistaken for people who want to harm the man so they are arrested. But when he sees something they left, he knows who and what they are. They leave word that they contact them through Jamie Hamilton, a reporter they met.
- DirectorAlan J. LeviStarsRichard HatchDirk BenedictLorne GreeneMilitary engagements with the Cylons push the Colonial Fleet toward an ice planet, where a vanguard discovers a Cylon weapon capable of singlehandedly destroying the Galactica.
- DirectorChristian I. Nyby IIStarsRichard HatchDirk BenedictLorne GreeneStarbuck's unplanned double-date with Cassiopeia and Athena on the recently-reopened luxury liner Rising Star is interrupted when the Galactica picks up long-range transmission traffic indicating human life in a distant solar system on the other side of a vast asteroid dust field. Starbuck is recalled to duty to pilot the Starchaser, an up-powered reconnaissance viper denuded of weaponry and bearing a voice-activated computer - Computer, Oral Response Activated, known simply as CORA - that can handle the vast increase in performance in the new viper. Starbuck is enthralled by the new viper, but less enthusiastic about CORA, who bears a personality that grates on Starbucks nerves. Starbuck picks up two star-craft from hundreds of years vintage and in the process he is double-crossed and knocked unconscious by a smuggler of liquor. Starbuck later finds himself incarcerated on Proteus, a prison planetoid that is a surviving body from hundreds of such penal facilities scattered through the stars by the Colonies during the Cylon War, facilities that made munitions and liquor for the war effort. Proteus is now manned by the distant antecedents of its original guards and prisoners and continues to make ambrosia for Colonial warriors, even though hundreds of years worth of ambrosia have never left the planet - and the planet may not even survive, as a Cylon patrol that has detected Starbuck's now-stolen viper has spotted the planetoid while the stolen viper is being pursued by Apollo and Boomer.
- DirectorDaniel HallerStarsKent McCordBarry Van DykeRobyn DouglassThe lives of all Galacticans are in the hands of Troy and Dillon after a Cylon warship destroys the space fleet's farm ship, and food supplies have to be replenished immediately from Earth.
- DirectorDaniel HallerStarsRichard HatchDirk BenedictLorne GreeneCount Iblis has delivered the Colonials' enemy, Baltar before the Council of Twelve. As the Colonials celebrate, Adama and Apollo come to the conclusion that the secret to Iblis' identity can only be found within the wreckage of the ship where he was first encountered.
- DirectorDonald P. BellisarioStarsRichard HatchDirk BenedictLorne GreeneShot down by Cylons, Starbuck crash lands on Attila, a planet on the far edge of Omega Sector and finds himself rescued from a phalanx of Cylons by a family of children. Kyle, the young leader of these self proclaimed warriors, soon hatches a plan to trade Starbuck to Outpost commander Spectre for his captured father.
- DirectorDaniel HallerStarsRichard HatchDirk BenedictLorne GreeneDuring a celebration honoring Commander Kronus, Starbuck recognizes an old flame of his, Aurora and breaks off a date with Cassiopeia to follow his lost love to the Celestra. On their arrival, Starbuck and Apollo find themselves in the midst of a mutiny.
- DirectorVince EdwardsStarsRichard HatchDirk BenedictLorne GreeneWhile suffering from a fuel shortage, The Galactica finds the supposedly lost Battlestar Pegasus, led by the legendary Commander Cain.
- DirectorChristian I. Nyby IIStarsLorne GreeneRichard HatchDirk BenedictThe crew of the Galactica struggle to fight massive fires on board caused by Cylon suicide incendiary attacks.
- DirectorRichard A. CollaAlan J. LeviStarsRichard HatchDirk BenedictLorne GreeneAfter the Twelve Colonies of Mankind were destroyed in a sneak attack by the Cylon tyranny, the last Battlestar Galactica leads a makeshift fugitive fleet on a desperate search for the legendary planet Earth.
- DirectorRod HolcombStarsRichard HatchDirk BenedictLorne GreeneThe mysterious Ship of Lights reappears, hijacks Apollo and his viper in space and sends him on a quest to save the planet Terra during peace negotiations with the Eastern Alliance. One of the beings of light takes human form to guide Apollo, and makes him take on the appearance of a missing Terran named Charlie.
- DirectorBarry CraneStarsKent McCordBarry Van DykeRobyn DouglassTreacherous Xaviar, the renegade Galactican, in disguise sends Troy and Dillon on a phony mission, so that he can take as hostage the earthbound Galactican children who Jamie has entered in what turns out to be a hilarious, out-of-this-world charity baseball game, on "Galactica 1980".
- 1978–197947m7.1 (443)TV EpisodeDirectorAlan J. LeviStarsRichard HatchDirk BenedictLorne GreeneAs Apollo and the team of convicted specialists brave the snowy mountain to blow up the Ravashol Pulsar, the criminals plan their escape. Starbuck is still determined to make a detour and rescue cadet Cree, but the Theta clones object to the destruction of their creator's weapon.
- DirectorChristian I. Nyby IIStarsRichard HatchDirk BenedictLorne GreeneAfter the Cylons destroy two of the fleet's Agro ships and cripple the last remaining one, Adama hopes to swap an old energizer for seed on the the planet Sectar in Quadrant Zeta. Unfortunately, Siress Belloby won't give up the energizer unless the commander courts her. Down on the planet, the inhabitants of the small Agro community of Serenity are looking for a new dispensable constable to hold off the Borays, who raid the town each high moon.
- DirectorWinrich KolbeStarsRichard HatchDirk BenedictLorne GreeneWhile Commander Adama deals with a newly assertive Council of Twelve's modification of his command, Baltar plots his escape.
- DirectorVince EdwardsStarsKent McCordBarry Van DykeRobyn DouglassTroy and Dillon are teaching some of the children raised on the Galactica about what they can expect on Earth if and when they get to go there. But when their vessel is attacked by the Cylons, they escape. But because they can't make it back to the Galactica, they decide to land on Earth. So they try to make the children appear to be like children on Earth. They dress them as scouts and Troy and Dillon pretend to be scout masters. Their landing is detected by the Air Force, so a Colonel shows up to investigate.
- DirectorDonald P. BellisarioStarsRichard HatchDirk BenedictLorne GreeneWhen the Galactica crew detects that a Cylon Basestar has swung around to attempt to intercept the refugee fleet, Commander Adama decides to attack.
- 1978–197947m7.4 (469)TV EpisodeDirectorChristian I. Nyby IIStarsRichard HatchDirk BenedictLorne GreeneAfter traversing a large void in space, the Galactica and the refugee fleet discover the home planet of their species, Kobol.
- DirectorSigmund Neufeld Jr.StarsKent McCordBarry Van DykeRobyn DouglassEarthbound Troy and Dillon rush to the East Coast to intercept what they believe to be a downed Galactican spacecraft, but find that it is really the first ship of the treacherous Cylons to locate the lost human civilization they want to destroy, in "Galactica 1980".
- DirectorSidney HayersStarsKent McCordBarry Van DykeRobyn DouglassTroy and Dillon leap back with Jamie to 1944 to stop Xaviar's attempt to help the development of the V-2 rocket at Peenemunde. Later they return to 1980 CA but need to secure their impounded Vipers from U.S. military inspection.
- DirectorVince EdwardsStarsRichard HatchDirk BenedictLorne GreeneAfter Baltar's attack is repulsed, the crews of the Galactica and Pegasus carry out an attack on the planet Gamoray to acquire fuel supplies.
- DirectorRod HolcombStarsRichard HatchDirk BenedictLorne GreeneStarbuck is framed for murder of a sports rival. Apollo suspects Baltar but Adama agrees to charge Starbuck and try him for murder until Apollo can come up with some proof that he didn't do it.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanSam and Rebecca have definitely decided that they are going to have a baby together. Rebecca wants the conception not just to be a technical exercise, but a special night that they can tell their child about. The night should be a romantic one. Just before they are ready to do it, Rebecca's talk of "making a baby" makes Sam realize what they are doing and he gets nervous and runs out on her. He needs advice and turns to Frasier. Frasier thinks Sam's nervousness is related to the fact of the purpose, as opposed to the act of making love. Sam needs to make the evening more about making love than making a baby. Concerned that she did something wrong, Rebecca turns to Lilith for advice on the situation. Lilith thinks that Sam's nervousness was due to the fact that he has never made love with the purpose of having a child, and to make the act of this lovemaking special and different than the umpteen million other times he's made love to women, Rebecca should focus on the purpose of siring a child. When Sam returns to Rebecca's apartment, their evening gets worse as they are working at cross purposes to each other.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonShelley LongRhea PerlmanSam suffers a hernia while trying to prove that he's not getting too old.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanIt's Halloween, and the Cranes are arguing about how much of the Halloween tradition, if any, to which they should expose Frederick. Another argument going on, one more traditional, is that between the gang at Cheers and the gang at Gary's Olde Towne Tavern, Halloween a day that bar wars of the prank kind happen. As Sam and the gang decide what to do to Gary and his bar - as Carla states, she wants to be on a winning side of a great scam - Gary already hits. But the pranks come to a screeching halt from Gary's side when he comes into Cheers and announces that he wants a truce as he was just diagnosed with extremely high blood pressure. Sam doesn't believe him and continues to plot. Checking how their own prank on Gary went over, the Cheers gang goes over to Gary's and finds him alone unconscious on the floor. Frasier checks: Gary isn't unconscious, but dead. Seeing Gary on the floor, Sam doesn't believe Gary's dead. After the police and coroner confirm Frasier's check, Sam doesn't believe Gary's dead. When one of Gary's bartenders gives Sam one of Gary's prized possessions, Sam doesn't believe Gary's dead. As Gary's funeral is announced, Sam doesn't believe Gary's dead. After Sam sees Gary inside the casket, Sam doesn't believe Gary's dead. As the casket is lowered into the ground, Sam doesn't believe Gary's dead. Is Gary dead? Regardless, Carla gets her wish.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonShelley LongNicholas ColasantoSam and Diane try to stop Carla from sleeping with her new boyfriend after they learn that he has a heart condition.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanJohn Allen Hill, a famous Manhattan restaurateur, has bought Melville's, which Rebecca thinks is going to boost business for Cheers. Hill and Sam's relationship starts off slowly and gets worse and worse. The first spoken threat from Hill is the fact that he actually owns the property of the bar's pool room and washrooms, implying that he wants Sam to meet all his demands or else. Hill wants a floor mat at the bottom of the interior stairs and wants to use the bar as the restaurant's lounge which includes treating Cheers' staff as Melville's staff. And a consequence of Hill's ownership of Melville's is that the bar is filled with a different yuppie clientele, who most importantly don't know that Norm's bar stool is only for Norm. But the last straw for Sam is that Hill wants his parking spot back, which Sam has always used to park his beloved Corvette. Sam and Hill refuse to do business with each other, which leads to Hill bricking off the bar's hallway - the one leading to his washrooms and pool room. Hill will only take down the wall when Sam starts to pay rent. Sam is slowly descending into madness from this situation which culminates into the ultimate in insults for Sam. Meanwhile, Woody receives some somewhat suggestive pictures from Kelly in Paris. However, Carla notices a hairy large thumb in one of the photos, meaning the pictures were taken by a man. Finding out who this Lothario is becomes an all-consuming thought for Woody.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonShelley LongRhea PerlmanDiane admits to the gang that she has been taking a ballet class at the local community college under the tutelage of world renowned Madame Lihkova. The final exam for the class entailed performing a solo to be videotaped for adjudication. The gang at the bar intercepts the tape and the critique before Diane has a chance to see it; the critique is negative as Diane truly has no dancing talent. To spare Diane's feelings, Frasier decides to write a glowing review for Diane instead thinking that this act of kindness will cause no harm. After reading the altered review, which states that she has "the soul of a dancer", Diane decides to pursue her dream of becoming a ballerina, despite her advanced age. She crashes a closed practice for Boston Ballet, and is about ready to perform for the company when...
- DirectorGeorge WendtStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanAfter being cut by the Bruins, Eddie finally gets a job as a penguin, not of the Pittsburgh variety, but rather a dressed-up penguin in The World of Ice ice show. The first stop on the show's tour is Seattle. Carla is reluctant to visit Eddie on the extended Seattle stop as everyone finally finds out she is afraid to fly, or to be more precise she is afraid to crash. After the gang discuss ways to help Carla, Frasier decides that he could hold a week long pteromerhanophobia workshop ending with an actual flight on a plane. Carla agrees to participate. Frasier's workshop ends up doing the trick but not quite in the way he had anticipated. Meanwhile, Murray Treadwell, a local restaurant critic, is doing a series of reviews of bars. When Cheers was managed by Sam, Treadwell gave the bar a rotten review, so Rebecca will do anything to rectify that. Treadwell implies to Rebecca that he will give the bar a good review if she goes out with him. Will Rebecca's personal relationship, or perhaps lack of, with Treadwell affect their review negatively?
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonShelley LongNicholas ColasantoCoach accidentally finds out that his recently-deceased friend once made a pass at his wife.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonShelley LongRhea PerlmanSam couldn't stop the wedding, but Frasier tells him that Diane left him at the altar and is now working at a convent. So Sam visits Diane to ask her to come back to Cheers. Meanwhile, Woody comes to Boston to look for a job and becomes Cheers's new bartender after his pen pal Coach died.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonShelley LongNicholas ColasantoCoach falls in love and gets engaged. But when his fiancée wins the lottery, her feelings toward him take an unexpected turn.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanIt's time for the 53rd annual Miss Boston Barmaid contest, and this year it's being held at Cheers again, but Sam's not happy. The contest organizers have changed the format where beauty, chest size and overall bimbo-ness account for nothing. Rather, it's now a contest of true waitressing skills. Despite this, Carla is not interested in entering - she knows she can be the best waitress in the world if she wants to be (self-admittedly, her "friendliness" quotient is a bit lacking) and doesn't need anyone to tell her so - until she learns that first prize is a new Mazda Miata convertible. She will do anything to win that car. On the day of the contest, she obtains a confidential document naming the three judges, one of whom is none other than Cheers' own Cliff. Norm convinces Carla that to win the contest, Carla has to be nice to Cliff, not exactly the easiest thing in the world to do for Carla. Carla has to decide if the Miata or being nasty to Cliff is of greater priority. By contest time, Carla will learn if she made the right decision. At the end of it all, at least Sam's faith in the world is restored.
- DirectorJames BurrowsThomas LofaroStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanIt's the Christmas season. Frasier is in a anti-Christmas bah-humbug mood much to Lilith's chagrin. Norm has a part-time job he fails to mention. And Cliff is collecting food for the needy all in an effort to win a trip to Disney World. Rebecca has Carla, Woody and Sam all working Christmas Eve as will she. Carla doesn't mind the extra money. Woody isn't going back to Hanover so he doesn't mind. But Sam hates working what he considers the holiday. When it's close to closing time on Christmas Eve, Carla, Woody and Sam decide to exchange their gifts with each other. That's when Sam learns that everyone seems to have a present for Rebecca - which he doesn't - and in turn Rebecca has a gift for everyone. In a panic, Sam rushes out trying to find somewhere - anywhere - that is still open so he can get a gift for her. The second problem may be to find something appropriate, which strikes that perfect balance of being not too expensive but still saying "I want to sleep with you". He may get his wish with the latter.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanFrasier and Lilith are having a domestic spat, and Lilith is withholding sex. Frasier is going a little stir crazy because of it. Woody is having a spat in name only with 'Larry Bird' of the Boston Celtics who is originally from French Lick, Indiana, from where people of Hanover, Indiana are considered the dufuses of the state. Hanover residents have the same opinion of French Lick residents. With the rest of the gang, they're preparing for the next contest with Gary's Olde Towne Tavern, namely a three-on-three basketball game of bar employees. Gary "hires" a couple of extremely tall ringers. Sam goes one step further and "hires" Boston Celtic, Kevin McHale. Sam tells Kevin that the game is for charity - an orphanage - to persuade him to do this for him. Because of the surety of winning, Sam bets Gary $5,000 on the game, Gary unaware that Kevin is Cheers' ringer. When Kevin ultimately finds out he was duped about the charity aspect of the game, he's mad but agrees to play if the $5,000 is donated to an orphanage. At the game, Cheers wipes out Gary's, but Woody also wipes out Kevin at the end of the game with what initially looks to be a severe ankle injury. The injury ends up being not bad. However the Celtics doctor comes to the bar the next day with news that Kevin's injury is season ending. Kevin's injury has an unexpected affect on the bet and the bar war with Gary.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonShelley LongNicholas ColasantoSam makes plans for a romantic getaway with a local journalist. But Diane overhears parts of his conversations and jumps to the incorrect conclusion that he is making plans to spend the weekend with her.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanFrasier has a massive headache, and no matter what he does, it won't go away. For Frasier, Lilith suggests he take an extreme measure: acupuncture or at least acupressure. Believing it quackery, Frasier initially won't do it, until... The process isn't quite what Lilith expects. What will go away if the US government and Woody have their way is Henrí, whose Visa has run out. Henrí mentions that a way he could stay is to marry a US citizen, an idea on which Kelly picks up, with her being the bride. Woody doesn't like the idea. Woody and Kelly have an argument over it, which pushes Kelly into marrying Henrí, she believes only "on paper". They would get divorced immediately after, but Henrí may have other thoughts. This action by Kelly could jeopardize Woody's immediate future plan to ask Kelly to marry him, and thus jeopardize their long term future together.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanThere are a lot of transactions taking place in the bar this evening. Despite Rebecca's concern about its legality and its affect on the bar's license, Sam organizes the first sets of transactions: a basketball betting pool worth $500, $125 for each of the four quarters. Two reluctant bettors are Woody, who doesn't like to lose money or take money from his friends, and Rebecca, who eventually sees that $500 is more than she normally makes in an evening's work. The second transaction happens between the Cranes and Norm, the former who have hired the latter to decorate their unborn child's nursery in as neutral and unbaby-like a scheme as possible. And the third sets of transactions happen primarily between the gang at the bar and the local florist. It's Carla's second wedding anniversary to Eddie, and she is without Eddie for the evening as he's on the road with the ice show. Carla is certain that he'll come through with a romantic gesture for their anniversary regardless. He's got five and a half hours until midnight and nothing yet has happened. Many people in the bar have their doubts if Eddie will actually come through. As a result, Carla receives more than one floral bouquet that evening. The question is are any of them really from Eddie?
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonShelley LongRhea PerlmanDiane waltzes into the bar full of cheer, announcing to Sam that she had a premonition that he would ask her to marry him today; he mocks her and laughs in her face. Superstitious Carla warns Sam not to test the fate of woman's intuition. Diane does whatever she can to set the mood for a proposal and Sam does everything he can to prove to Diane that he won't propose. When they're finally alone just prior to midnight, Sam states that her insistence is driving him nuts and adamantly states that he will never ask her to marry him again. When Diane comes to the realization that it might not happen, her tears start to flow which prompts Sam to ask her to marry him. She says no, again! For a split second, he dreams that he has murdered Diane and is on death row - he chases her out of the bar to perhaps do the deed?! The following day, we find that Diane has had Sam arrested for assault and battery, and has asked newly minted but inept lawyer Tom, who has finally passed the bar examine after umpteen tries, to be his lawyer. At the bail hearing, Diane walks with a cane into the courtroom with a brace around her neck. Sam denies even laying a hand on her. Despite the fact that the judge has waived bail and released Sam on his own recognizance, Diane feels the need to tell the court of their relationship and their proposal history. Suggested by Tom and agreed to by the judge, they can get themselves out of this entire situation if Sam just proposes to Diane again.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanThe gang is celebrating its second anniversary of beating Gary's Olde Towne Tavern in bowling, their one and only victory in the bar wars. But they are also on a winning streak. The act of Gary stealing and breaking the bowling trophy reignites their war, of which Rebecca is unfamiliar. She refuses to participate, until the war starts to affect her. The pranks are generally mild but juvenile, but Rebecca agrees to Gary's offer of a truce. The cease fire quickly ends when Gary pulls another prank. Beyond the pranks, the gang at Cheers become paranoid about every stranger that comes into the bar, including someone who claims to be Red Sox power hitter Wade Boggs, who says he was sent by Gary to sign autographs. He looks like Wade Boggs, sounds like Wade Boggs, but does that make him Wade Boggs? The resulting end of this war is in the words of the wise "pretty weeny".
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonShelley LongNicholas ColasantoCoach wants to ask out an attractive younger woman, but he doesn't have the guts. Sam sets his sights on her too, but he keeps getting shot down--badly.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonShelley LongRhea PerlmanDiane finds the perfect house for her and Sam to buy. An elderly couple, Bert and Lillian Miller, currently live there and have for forty years. After hearing the Miller's stories of life in that house, Diane no longer thinks that it is the perfect house for her since it is Bert and Lillian's emotionally. Based on a statement by the Millers that they will miss the Christmases the most, Frasier suggests that Sam and Diane give the Millers one last Christmas in the house to rid Diane and Sam of any guilt. Sam thinks it's a screwy idea, but it's just what Diane needs. Despite it being the heat of summer, Diane decides not to wait until December and to have Christmas come in the summer this year, at least for the Millers and their extended family. The summer Christmas party has an unintended effect both for the Millers and for Diane, but Sam decides he needs to take control of the situation which isn't totally under control until he sees dogs playing black jack.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonShelley LongRhea PerlmanThe guys at the bar feel sorry for Carla because nobody has responded to her newspaper singles ad. So they start sending her romantic responses from a fictional airline pilot.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonShelley LongNicholas ColasantoSam agrees to be Carla's date for her ex-husband Nick's wedding. And Sam's appearance makes Nick jealous, and causes him to ask Carla to take him back.
- DirectorTim BerryStarsTed DansonShelley LongRhea PerlmanAfter Woody's Uncle Fergie has a mugging filled trip to Boston. Woody's father thinks that Boston is too dangerous a place for his son. And he wants him to return back home to Indiana. The gang at the bar thinks that introducing Woody's friends through the making of a home movie, would settle Woody's father's concerns. The first attempt has Diane as writer, director and cinematographer. Her "cast" rebels at the unnatural, for them dialog in Diane's script. They fire her, and she then separates herself from the project. The final product of the second attempt has Woody shown individually with each of his friends. Each, against their own natural settings: Sam in his office. Carla at a backyard BBQ, with her rambunctious kids. Cliff on his postal route. Norm at the Hungry Heifer, and Frasier at his psychiatry practice's office. After watching it. They each agrees that they all come off as boobs. Except for Diane. She sees this version as the start of something great. To her, all it needs are a few Chamber's touches. Will Diane's Jean-Luc Godard inspired version, which she sent to Woody's parents, do the trick?
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanCheers is in competition with Gary's Olde Towne Tavern once again, this time it's the annual Bloody Mary contest open to all bars in the Greater Boston area. Cheers won the competition the first two years, but Gary's, ever since it opened, has won the last four. Rebecca has at least managed to get the organizers to hold the contest at Cheers this year. Sam in particular is in Bloody Mary mode, even getting Norm to stop drinking beer and start sampling Bloody Mary's. Sam believes his secret ingredient - if he can get a hold of it - will win them the contest. Regardless, Rebecca plans on stealing some of Gary's Bloody Mary mix to have it analyzed, which they all agree - more publicly than they imagined - is the best Bloody Mary they've ever tasted. Knowing that they can't beat Gary by the quality of the Bloody Mary, the Cheers group decide other methods are in order to win. Collectively and individually, they hatch plans for Gary not to win. Will any of these plans work or will they stumble all over themselves in the process? A consequence of the scheming could be the end of a friendship between one of the Cheers regulars and everyone else at the bar.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonShelley LongRhea PerlmanDiane thinks that Frasier is masking romantic feelings for his colleague, Dr. Lilith Sternin, so she launches a plan to fan the flames of love. Meanwhile, Norm and Cliff reluctantly join Woody for a fishing trip.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanEvan Drake wants to speak to Rebecca about something important. She thinks it is finally to tell her that he loves her. In her mind, all the signs are there: since his divorce, he has had many of his business meals at Melville's so that he can be close to her, and he is currently in her office using her phone with his mouth inches away from where her own mouth is so often. He however tells her that he has accepted a job to take over the corporation's Japanese division and is off to Japan for good that evening. She is devastated. Sam feels that she needs to tell Drake how she feels before he takes off, or else she'll be in romantic limbo for the rest of her life. Sam even plans a party for Drake to give her such an opportunity. Opportunity after opportunity fails that evening for Rebecca to tell him what she wants, but as she finagles her way to drive him to the airport... What Rebecca does end up saying places a kibosh on Sam's own plans with Rebecca.
- DirectorAndy AckermanJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanA panel discussion with the cast of Cheers after their 200th show hosted by John McLaughlin.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonShelley LongNicholas ColasantoOne of Diane's old college friends comes to the bar. She is vulnerable and looking for a man to give her an afternoon of unbridled passion, and Sam predictably jumps at the opportunity.
- DirectorAndy AckermanStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanCliff idolizes Weather Channel anchor, Dorothy Boysick, who, annoying to most but endearing to Cliff, has a lisp. Cliff writes her a fan letter, and gets an unexpected reply. Meanwhile, co-owner of the bar, Rebecca, wants to open a tearoom in the pool room. Sam thinks it's a dumb idea, but allows Rebecca to open it on a trial basis, letting her keep it if she clears $500 on her first night. Sam thinks this goal impossible for Rebecca. Things are going very slowly on her trial day, and Rebecca doesn't help her own cause when she chastises Frasier and Lilith, her first and only customers, when they solely order her loss leader, orange pekoe tea. However, things take an up turn for Rebecca when she hijacks and starts selling Woody's chili, which everyone in the bar loves. As it seems like Rebecca's converted chili room is a success, Sam feels like he needs to take drastic measures to sabotage Rebecca. Sam ultimately shows Rebecca how he feels about her as co-manager/co-owner, but he shows more about how he feels about his 'vette.
- DirectorAndy AckermanStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanThe Cranes have received some devastating news: their one-year old son, Frederick, is intellectually average, the manifestation of which is that he has yet to utter his first word. Lilith thinks that it's because they as parents don't spend enough time with him. Lilith decides that she will be a stay at home Mom. When Lilith uncovers her domestic inabilities, Frasier takes over. But Frasier's idea of care-taking his son is to take him to Cheers and hang out with the guys, of which Lilith is unaware. Lilith is depressed that she sees Frasier as a better parent than her, that is until she finds that he has spent the day with Frederick at the bar. Nonetheless, Frederick's stay at Cheers has an unexpected but in Lilith's mind successful outcome. Meanwhile, Rebecca receives a dirty love letter from Robin, which is making her pine for some physical contact with him. Unfortunately for her, he is not allowed conjugal visits. Carla thinks Rebecca should make her next visit with Robin a conjugal one anyway, Rebecca thinking the usually deserted prison garden the perfect place. Will Robin go along with the idea, which, if caught, means his upcoming parole is in jeopardy? Frederick also speaks his first word.
- DirectorAndy AckermanStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanSam is continuing his battle with upstairs neighbor and the landlord of his pool room and washrooms, John Allen Hill. Sam feels like he needs to do something really to bug Hill. Just then, Sam meets Hills' daughter, Valerie. Sam is not exactly the type of man she usually goes out with, nor is she Sam's type, but he asks her out solely to get under Hill's skin. Having dinner at Melville's, Sam starts to make the moves on Valerie in plain view of Hill. Hill initially feigns disinterest, but ultimately breaks down in tears, telling Sam that he'll give Sam anything if Sam stops seeing Valerie. From this statement, Sam gets his pool room and washrooms rent free, and he gets his parking space back. Immediately, Sam drops Valerie, right in the middle of dinner. Valerie takes Sam rebuke graciously. But immediately after that, Sam decides he wants Valerie back if only because he can't have her, and Valerie still seems interested in Sam, but obviously they will have to keep their relationship a secret from Hill. How will the triangle between Hill, Valerie and Sam resolve itself? Meanwhile, Carla believes the foosball table that Woody finds in the storage closet is possessed. After Frasier gets his hand stuck in it, Carla brings in the person she believes best equipped to handle Frasier's problem.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonShelley LongNicholas ColasantoSam has to find a woman named Jacqueline Bisset and marry her so that he can win a bet he made when he was off the wagon and keep the bar.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanSam is reevaluating his life in light of the fact that Rebecca has chosen Robin Colcord as the love of her life, with whom, by the way, she has not yet slept. Rebecca plans on changing their sexual relationship status when Robin returns from his current business trip to Switzerland, but is nervous about doing the deed after such a long abstinence. The guys at the bar convince Sam that what he should do is get his life back by buying another bar. He finds a place, and gives his notice to Rebecca. However, the new site of "Sam's Place" is not all that it's cracked up to be. It's a dump in need of major renovations, and is located in the worst neighborhood in Boston, though underneath the maggot-infested boardings are nice touches such as a lead-pane stained-glass window, hardwood floor and marble bar top. Sam decides to move forward on the plans. An unlikely source makes him look at his plans in a different light, and to go after what he really wants. However, this person may have ulterior motives.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanFrasier is not having a good day. First his latest paper is attacked by a noted colleague, then second he comes down with an uncontrollable case of the hiccups. But his troubles are nothing compared to Rebecca's. Evan Drake, her boss and unrequited love, comes by the bar at a time when she is a physical mess from changing a tire. That and the fact that she has turned down every date from men in the company has led Mr. Drake to suspect that she is a lesbian, which Rebecca is horrified to learn. Mr. Drake invites Rebecca and whomever she chooses to be her date - perhaps a woman? - to a black-tie function. Since Rebecca has not had a date in the two years she's been lusting after Mr. Drake, she doesn't have a man upon who she call to bring. Sam volunteers, and based on circumstances, Rebecca takes him up on his offer. At the party, she, in her mind, needs to convince Mr. Drake that she is not only a heterosexual but that she is attracted to him. Her bold but unexpected actions evoke a slightly different reaction from Mr. Drake. Sam tries to smooth the resulting waters, while helping himself in the process.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanCarla's eyesight is getting bad and she secretly gets a pair of reading glasses. The guys at the bar start with all the standard "four eyes" jokes, until Carla vows to make their life miserable unless they stop. Cliff continues with the jokes, saying that it's worth whatever revenge Carla has in store. Or is it? Rebecca is still wanting to buy the bar back from Sam, who mocks her in her attempt. She has $25,000 cash that she received from her father to do so, but Sam adamantly refuses to sell. Rebecca has an ally in John Allen Hill, who will sell Rebecca the bar's back rooms (including the washrooms), which again he owns, for the $25,000. Sam realizes that Rebecca having this control could ruin him, so he tries to outbid her for the property. Hill implies that any little favors by either Sam or Rebecca could sway him in their direction. Sam and Rebecca both will do almost anything for the property, and Hill relishes in the attention he gets from both. Both Sam and Rebecca can do menial tasks for Hill, but only Rebecca has the sexual power over Hill. But will Rebecca sell her body for the bar's back rooms and does Sam have anything to match Rebecca's body in the bidding war?
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonShelley LongNicholas ColasantoCarla tries to stand up to Nick when he demands custody of their first-born son, which means not giving in to his surprisingly irresistible charm.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanThe on-going battle between Jeanne-Marie and Rebecca for Robin's affections continues. Robin apparently bought Jeanne-Marie a house on the Left Bank. Because of that, Rebecca thinks Robin is going to dump her. Instead, he asks her to move in with him. She readily accepts, thinking he's going to dump Jeanne-Marie. While Robin is away on a business trip, Rebecca, with Sam, Norm and Woody's help, starts moving in to Robin's apartment. They discover a confidential Lillian Corporation document coming through Robin's fax machine, the document which was obtained using Rebecca's secret computer password. Norm concludes that Robin is going to attempt a hostile takeover of the Lillian Corporation, information for which he obtained using Rebecca's access to the company without her knowledge. Despite still being in love with Robin, Rebecca hums and haws about what to do. If Rebecca doesn't turn Robin in, Sam, Norm or Woody could. But the four may have some problems if Robin finds out that they have his top secret information.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonShelley LongNicholas ColasantoDiane warns Sam not to go out with a friend she met at the mental hospital because she has obsessive issues with men. But Sam doesn't heed the warning, and puts himself in a situation that he's afraid to get out of.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanFrasier is nervous about a speech he has to make at a seminar. Carla suggests a device she uses: picture everyone naked, but wearing black socks. She says that you just can't help but laugh at the picture. It works. As Frasier practices it with people in general, he gets more and more and more relaxed. Perhaps he gets a little too relaxed as he forgets something important. Meanwhile, Rebecca is asked by yet another Vice-President at the company to do a menial task. Mr. Sheridan needs someone to house-sit and look after his dog Buster while he's away on a trip. As usual, Rebecca agrees, although this time she does so reluctantly in part because looking after such a large house by herself spooks her out a bit. Sam sees this as the perfect opportunity to get her into bed by visiting her at the house and playing on her insecurities. However as Sam enters the house, Buster finds an open door to leave. So Rebecca, Sam and the rest of the gang at the bar are placed on Buster search detail. Thrown into the mix are an attack dog named Satan, who looks like Buster and who Woody finds as a replacement "just in case", and the fact that Mr. Sheridan is on his way home a day early.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanSam turned Robin in to the Lillian Board of Directors, and as such, Robin has been indicted for insider trading. Rebecca is standing by Robin, although she, deep in her heart, knows that Robin, in her own words, is going to fry. But at least she has the solace in knowing that Sam, her friend, was not the one who turned Robin in. When she finds out that it was Sam - she finds out when the Lillian Corporation sells the bar back to Sam for $1 (actually 85¢) - Rebecca is livid. She decides to leave Cheers forever and forget it ever existed, and to head off to wherever Robin is. Further acts by the Lillian Corporation, Sam and Robin affect Rebecca's decision concerning her future, until...
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanWoody and Kelly argue once again about the difference in their monetary status. Kelly wants to live in a house purchased by her father. Woody, not wanting any Gaines money, wants them to live in his old apartment as that's all he can afford. They compromise, which shows them that one side might be more correct in their outlook than the other. Meanwhile, Rebecca's father, Navy Captain Franklin E. Howe, comes to Boston for a visit. A tough-as-nails man and father, he demands that Rebecca, who has screwed up her life in Boston, move back to San Diego into her old room in their home. Apparently, he has controlled her her entire life, including providing her with an allowance. He expects that Rebecca will put up a fight and demand to live her life in Boston as she sees fit. Captain Howe has an ulterior motive for his visit to Boston; if Rebecca knew this true motive, it might change the entire nature of their disagreement.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonShelley LongRhea PerlmanDiane rejects Cliff's request to be his date for the postman's ball, so he asks Carla, who will go with him--for a price. But what will he do when Diane reconsiders and decides to go with him?
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanThe Gaines family has recruited Sam and crew to provide liquor and bartending services at the wedding, and as we'd expect, everything goes wrong. Woody is randy for Kelly, while the rest of the gang learns Mr. Gaines would gladly have Woody killed if he learned Woody and Kelly had premarital relations; Kelly tears her dress, and it's seamstress Cliff to the rescue; and the minister has a heart attack and dies in the kitchen, leading the gang to try and keep the dead body hidden in the dumbwaiter and to recruit a last-minute replacement, a completely wasted member of the Gaines family who we learn, after the gang sobers him up, that he hates weddings, leading them to re-inebriate him. And outside the kitchen in the courtyard, the family Dobermans attack everyone who tries to walk past.
- 1982–199330mTV-PG7.3 (408)TV EpisodeDirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanThere is a new postal uniform which Cliff refuses to wear despite never having seen it. Twitchell, the bar's postal delivery man, threatens to report Cliff unless he complies. Twitchell does report Cliff by bringing in postal inspector Henderson, who will suspend Cliff unless he complies. Once Cliff sees the flashy, sequin-trimmed uniform, Cliff changes his mind and wears the new uniform proudly. However, there's something about the uniform that Cliff doesn't know. Meanwhile, Woody's naive cousin, Russell, comes to Boston for a visit. Once they hear him, Sam and Rebecca hire Russell to sing and play the piano at the bar for tips. Russell is somewhat obsessive once he gets his mind set on something, and his newest fixation is Rebecca. When she confronts him about his supposed crush, he says he doesn't have one. In reality he has an all consuming love, as expressed by the semi-nude mural of Rebecca he's painted on his motel room wall. Rebecca has to figure out how to let him down gently, or so she thinks.
- DirectorJohn RatzenbergerStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanCliff goes into the mail order shoe business. At only $19.99 a pop, all the guys in the bar decide to get a pair. When the shoes arrive, the guys are all amazed at how comfortable and good looking the shoes are, but... Meanwhile, Rebecca thinks that she finally has her ticket out of the bar. Daniel T. Collier, the Chairman of the Board of the corporation - which by the way is called Lillian - asks her to organize a cocktail party at his house. Against Rebecca's better judgment, she agrees to hire Sam and Woody to tend bar at the party. The party is going well until Woody empties some garbage into what he thinks is a garbage can, but is really a priceless antique vase. What's worse is that Rebecca accidentally breaks the vase while she's emptying it out. Admissions to Mr. Collier aka Pinky as to who did what to the vase has an unexpected short to medium term result, despite Woody and Sam's best efforts to be the martyrs.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanThe gang thinks that since it's St. Patrick's Day - one of the busiest bar days of the year - Gary of Gary's Olde Towne Tavern is about ready to strike on Cheers despite Rebecca and Gary having previously drawn an agreement to stop the pranks against each other. But Tecumseh, the Indian statue standing at the entrance of the bar, is missing, and the gang think that it's Gary who stole it. After Sam, Norm and Cliff close down Gary's bar with padlocks, toxic warning signs and police tape, they find out that Rebecca sent Tecumseh out solely to be varnished. Thus, the gang await the wrath of Gary. When the fire marshal arrives for the bar's six month inspection, the gang thinks he is Gary's revenge, which he isn't. Their collective nerves are so frayed waiting for Gary to hit, that Cliff suggests they, as an act of peace and good faith to Gary, sabotage themselves before Gary can. They finally learn what Gary's St. Patrick's Day plan is, which they believe is the worse thing he's ever done to them. Another outcome of the plan is that everyone in the bar ends up targeting one of their own.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanIt's the annual St. Patrick's Day battle of sales between Cheers and Gary's Olde Towne Tavern. Not only does Cheers lose the battle of the hi-jinx with an unsuspecting Woody taking the brunt of the battle, Cheers also loses the sales bet. Sam has finally had as much as he can take not only with the loss once again to Gary's but performing the most humiliating task he and the guys have had to endure due to the loss. Sam threatens Gary and decides to pull out one of the biggest guns he knows: Harry the Hat. Sam asks Harry to devise and execute the ultimate plan to beat Gary. Harry refuses. Despite Carla's assertion to take matters into her own hands, Sam finally gives up permanently to Gary. When Sam goes over to Gary's to wave the final white flag, he witnesses in horror what he believes is Carla's master plan. But what he witnesses is part of a deal Gary made with Rutherford Cunningham, who Sam knows better by another name.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonShelley LongNicholas ColasantoA man in the bar becomes sick of Cliff's obnoxious know-it-all behavior and challenges him to a fight. Will Cliff shut up, accept the challenge, or run away?
- DirectorThomas LofaroStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanRebecca is planning a bachelor auction at the bar to raise money for Children's Hospital. Despite Rebecca's nonchalance toward his participation, Sam ends up being one of the bachelors, as is Woody (who she actually asked). Both Sam and Woody end up regretting it because of who purchases them. Meanwhile, Lilith and Frasier are in pre-wedding mode. Frasier suggests something that is totally off the radar for Lilith, namely a pre-nuptial agreement. Lilith is shocked and hurt by Frasier's request. This act by Frasier could jeopardize the wedding, as is a resulting $2,000 act by Lilith unless Sam can come up with a plan to get the two back together again.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanDave Richards is looking for a replacement television sportscaster to fill his position and thinks Sam would be the perfect person: he knows sports and he looks good. Although initially apprehensive about his abilities to do it, Sam agrees to fill in for the week. If he does well, this stint could lead to a whole new career in front of the camera. With Woody's help, Sam makes up a lie to Rebecca to get out of working at the bar for that time. Although Rebecca eventually finds out the real reason for Sam's absence, she allows him time off as she sees it as a win-win situation for her. If he fails, he's humiliated. If he succeeds, he's out of her life. Reading the actual sportscasts is one issue, but the sports commentaries, where he has to write his own material and come up with a point of view, is a whole different matter. Like his earlier lie to Rebecca, Sam needs Woody's help with regard to the result of his sportscasts.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonShelley LongRhea PerlmanThe guys at the bar feel guilty for constantly teasing Diane and not inviting her to their gatherings, so they try to make up by taking her to her favorite opera.
- 1982–199330mTV-PG7.4 (649)TV EpisodeDirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonShelley LongNicholas ColasantoAfter Sam throws out a careless "I love you," he and Diane decide to take some time off to evaluate their relationship.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanWithout authorization from Sam or Rebecca, Woody has placed a free-drink coupon in a coupon book. Rebecca and Sam hate the idea as it will only attract a gaggle of freeloaders; the coupons place a further strain between Sam and John Allen Hill, who tries to use them to his advantage. But the bar's troubles are nothing compared to Carla's: her mother, Mama Lozupone, has had "the death dream." She and Carla are currently on the outs since Carla hasn't stuck to the family tradition handed down for generations: every female names one of her sons her father's first name and her mother's maiden name. Carla has refused to do this because she would be naming her son "Benito Mussolini"--even if it would make her Mama happy before she dies. But she has a change of heart, wondering what if her kids didn't do something she wanted while she was on her deathbed. She asks all of her kids if anyone would be willing to change their name, and Gino steps forward. Will Gino's act make Mama happy before she dies? The result of Gino's act makes Sam take his own action, which brings the Lozupone family closer together.
- DirectorRick BerenStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanCliff is convinced that his new neighbor is Adolf Hitler. If not for Ma standing up for him, Cliff would be evicted from the building for harassment. But Cliff's still not convinced as to his neighbor's true identity. Meanwhile, Carla and John Allen Hill continue their love-hate relationship. However it has gone to a new level, to a love-hate-heart attack stage. Hill had a heart attack while they were making love. Seemingly indifferent to the heart attack since Hill is just a romp in the hay, Carla eventually breaks down in tears since "her boyfriend" had a heart attack. She suspects that the reason he did have a heart attack is she spurted out the words "I love you" to Hill. She doesn't know what to do since their relationship is built on hate. She finally goes to see him in the hospital, and based on events and the fact that Hill is out of commission for eight weeks, they decide to try and move their relationship to the next phase of true boyfriend-girlfriend. This eight weeks, or perhaps a shorter time period, will test if they are destined to be truly boyfriend-girlfriend.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonShelley LongNicholas ColasantoDiane follows through with getting her portrait painted behind Sam's back. But the artist predicts that if she shows it to Sam, she will never see him again.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonShelley LongRhea PerlmanSumner Sloan, Diane's ex-fiancé and old English professor, tells her that he submitted one of her old unfinished novels to an editor at a publishing house, the editor who sees promise in it and sees the possibility of it being published. Diane hasn't yet finished it, in fact she hasn't written anything since she started working at Cheers. Sam secretly overhears their conversation, and thinks that their impending wedding may be holding Diane back in her writing career, something she's always wanted. Sam and Diane discuss her writing career in relation to their marriage, they both feel that in the immediate future only one of the two will happen. Each has his/her own feeling of what should happen, each being so steadfast in their view to an extreme. Sam's perspective is based on a daydream he has about himself and Diane in old age together, she having forgone her writing career. When push comes to shove, one of the two makes a unilateral decision for the two of them, that person who has the full realization that the decision is forever. Meanwhile, the guys at the bar make a bet on whether the wedding will actually happen.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanBecause Gary's Olde Towne Tavern is advertising heavily, Sam and Rebecca decide to hire an ad company to write a jingle for the bar. As Rebecca has only $200 to spend on such, the ad company foists Sy Flembeck, their resident hack writer, onto the Cheers account. Sy is not very creative or original. All his jingles are placed to the tune of Old MacDonald Had a Farm, and spell out the establishment's name in place of "E-I-E-I-O", even if there are more or less than five letters. But Sy's approach to jingles may actually have the desired if unintended effect of good advertisement. Meanwhile, Maggie O'Keefe has come back to Boston and wants to see Cliff. Once Cliff sees Maggie, he faints: she's very pregnant, supposedly with his child. However, Cliff doesn't believe that he is the father because... Cliff decides to marry Maggie anyway. Before Maggie decides what to do about Cliff's proposal, she has some additional news for Cliff about their past relationship.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanSam and Rebecca each have a date to attend the same black tie event at the USS Constitution, and both are stood up. Sam suggests that they go together, but Rebecca would rather do anything else than go on a date with Sam. Sam goes alone and after the event brings back to the bar Admiral William J. Crowe Jr., Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff. The admiral has a good time at the bar, as does everyone there hearing his stories. After he leaves, Rebecca is in a panic when her $32,000 borrowed diamond earrings that she had left in a tumbler in a her office go missing. She thinks the admiral has stolen them as he was the only person alone in her office during the evening. These are treasonous words in the mind of patriotic American, Cliff. As she turns everything upside down in her office in search of the earrings, Rebecca says she will do anything to get the earrings back, and yes, that anything includes sleeping with Sam. Carla suggests to Sam that they recreate the scene of the supposed crime. In doing so, Sam and Rebecca come to a new understanding about their relationship, but an understanding that Rebecca would rather not divulge to Sam.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonShelley LongRhea PerlmanSam loans Diane $500 to buy a book autographed by Ernest Hemmingway. She later gives the book to Sam as collateral until she pays back the loan, but Sam accidentally destroys it.
- DirectorJames BurrowsStarsTed DansonShelley LongNicholas ColasantoSam loans out his good luck charm to a slumping Red Sox pitcher. The pitcher immediately goes on a winning streak, but Sam begins experiencing a series of accidents.
- DirectorAndy AckermanStarsTed DansonKirstie AlleyRhea PerlmanDue to declining business since he has decided not to work, Norm has to fire his secretary, the mild mannered Doris. He writes her a letter of reference, which in her warped mind she misconstrues as a love letter. She confesses her supposed mutual love for Norm. Despite subtle and not so subtle hints from Norm, Doris just won't leave him alone. Frasier tells Norm that she is suffering from lack of self-esteem and he needs to build up her confidence to get rid of her. But a confession by Doris as to why she wasn't attracted to him when she worked for him gives Norm the idea of how best to get her to stop loving him. Meanwhile, Woody and Rebecca bore the gang with their respective stories. Woody's is about the coldest day ever in Boston, knowledge of which ultimately comes in handy. Rebecca's is about the antique desk that Robin has given her as a gift. He has let her know that there is a ring associated with the desk, the 'where' he will divulge to her next he sees her in two weeks. She believes the word in front of 'ring' is 'engagement' and she does whatever she can to find it or a clue in the desk as to its whereabouts. Could the ring refer to something else?