loganjhanselman Reviews

Army of the Dead (2021)

Helluva lot of fun!

[9/10 · 22 May 2021]

This movie blew me away! The opening credits sequence was incredible, the action was great, the special effects looked even better, it was very well shot, and there was some good acting in there as well.

In addition to all this, there were also a bunch of great payoffs storywise, which I won't get into. It The movie definitely delivered on the violence and the action as well as visuals, and you should definitely give it a watch.

Borat (2006)

I didn't think it was possible to laugh as hard and loudly as I did during this move

[10/10 · 9 October 2020]

Okay so basically, Borat. Where do I start? I knew what to expect from the movie, but at the same time I didn't expect it at all, if that makes sense. Is its sense of humor super offensive? Absolutely. Is it still funny as all hell? Absolutely. Could this movie get made today? Not in a million years, but anywho...

Lemme tell you, I haven't laughed that hard before, nor have I been that shocked before. I laughed so hard that everything hurt. I might've busted a rib, who knows. For example, when Borat and Azamat were fighting naked and running around and stuff, I had a full on asthma attack I was laughing so hard. Same goes for the opening scene alone, along with pretty much the whole movie. Then we have the whole Pamela Anderson situation. For those who've seen the movie, you know exactly what I'm talking about.

Now let's dig a little deeper. Everything was unscripted. And I mean, everything. I gotta hand it to Sacha Baron Cohen. Guy's got balls of pure steel. And the genius of the movie as a whole is not only how it's all unscripted and real, but also in the details and little hidden jokes throughout, like the censors restricting the film for kids under the age of 3, and also this character Cohen created. I've never seen anything like it and hopefully I never will again because Cohen is the only one who could ever pull it off.

Maybe the best thing about the whole movie besides its sense of humor, Cohen himself, and the details, it's definitely how there's never a dull moment in the film and how purely unpredictable it was. Everything was unexpected (ahem, kidnapping Pamela Anderson, ahem), and that's what strengthened the overall impact of the movie.

So, overall, a solid 10/10, and is easily the funniest movie I think I'll ever see in my lifetime.

Castle Rock: Clean (2019) Season 2, Episode 10

WHAT!?

[10/10 · 11 December 2019]

Just a quick spoiler warning before you read any further, if you watched the finale, you shouldn't have to worry about that.

So, where to start. The ending was such an improvement over last season. Every loose ends was wrapped up beautifully, it was awesome to see The Kid/Angel once again, and that ending completely blew me out of the water.

So, Joy was apparently a figment of Annie's imagination (either that or Annie killed her in the river and was a figment of her imagination), and that left my jaw on the floor along with Annie's last line "I'm his number one fan." That delivery and that ending was absolutely chilling and leaves so many things open to interpretation.

With that said, it was awesome seeing Lizzy Caplan complete her transformation into Annie Wilkes, and honestly, this season was awesome and the show itself has given us some of the greatest episodes in television. Props to everyone that worked on it.

Aladdin (2019)

I appreciated the effort, but it didn't work

[3/10 · 28 May 2019]

I walked into Aladdin knowing that nothing could top the original. That being said, I was hoping that it would be decent, and it really wasn't, and that made me sad because I'm a huge fan of Guy Ritchie films. I'm just gonna list all of the pros and cons of the film.

PROS: The cast and costuming was great, the Genie had a lot of enthusiasm in his performance, Aladdin and Jasmine had great voices, and I especially loved the darker side of Jafar.

CONS: Some of the musical numbers were very lackluster. The numbers such as "One Jump Ahead", "Friend Like Me", "Prince Ali", and "A Whole New World" were supposed to have a sense of energy and excitement, but I was bored throughout them all. I didn't like how they remixed "A Whole New World" to be this generic pop ballad. I also felt that the addition of the song "Speechless" was totally unnecessary. The Genie could've been better cast, but I like how he didn't try too hard to copy Robin Williams. I said before that I liked Jafar's darker nature, but he could've been even darker and more menacing had he been better cast. Some of the camera work was lame and there was nothing special about it. I also didn't sense any chemistry between Aladdin and Jasmine. Also, I wish I could've seen more of Guy Ritchie's distinctive style of filmmaking instead of a generic blockbuster because I really like his films. I was also missing some of the elements from the original such as a smartmouth Iago, Jasmine being trapped in the hourglass, and shapeshifting Jafar just to cap it all off.

That all being said, I wish I could've enjoyed it more. I personally think that Guy Ritchie should stay away from the blockbuster genre (unless it's a Sherlock Holmes movie), and he should stick to independent films such as "Snatch" and "Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels". In conclusion, I didn't like Aladdin, and I wish I could've enjoyed it more.

Get Out (I) (2017)

One of the smartest and bone-chilling movies I have ever seen

[10/10 · 4 March 2019]

My brother and I recently watched Get Out, and we absolutely loved it. I would highly recommend for horror movie fans.

It may require a second viewing to pick up the crazy smart foreshadowing that's present within the film. The whole concept of it was pretty terrifying, and that's always a great thing for a horror movie.

I won't say anything else because you should go ahead and watch Get Out, but be wary of the last 20 minutes.

Last thing: Kudos to Jordan Peele for making such an awesome departure from sketch comedy to horror.

American Pie (1999)

The funniest movie ever made. Period.

[10/10 · 13 February 2019]

And yes, American Pie was the movie that made me think so.

Let's start with the basics. The plot: American Pie is about four high school boys who make a pact to lose their virginity by prom night. As predicted, not everything goes as planned. My rating: 10/10.

American Pie perfectly blends buddy comedy and extreme gross-out humor. It's one of those movies that is easy to predict when something bad will happen, but that's what made me laugh so hard. For example, the contaminated beer scene, the opening scene in which a boy is caught watching porn, the internet scene, and the bathroom scene, to name a few.

Also, the cast was absolutely stellar. It had names such as Jason Biggs, Eugene Levy, Seann William Scott, and Jennifer Coolidge.

Lastly, I don't think I've ever laughed that hard, and that's saying something.

Watchmen (2009)

The most faithful comic book adaptation I have ever seen.

[10/10 · 9 January 2019]

Before watching this film, I read the 12-chapter graphic novel "Watchmen". I loved it and decided to watch the Ultimate Cut of the film.

This cut included absolutely EVERYTHING from the novel, including the "Tales of The Black Freighter" story.

Let's start from the very start of the film. The Comedian's death was perfectly filmed, and it followed with an even better opening credits sequence.

Then, we have the introduction of perhaps the greatest comic book character of all time: Rorschach. Next, we are introduced to Dan Dreiberg/Nite-Owl and Silk Spectre. Then, we have the most tragic character, Dr. Manhattan. Finally, we are introduced to Adrian Veidt, the main villain.

I won't drop any spoilers, but from there, each scene is adapted from the graphic novel shot-for-shot. That's how faithful it is to the source material. All I have to say is Kudos to Zack Snyder for adapting a masterful graphic novel into an even bigger masterpiece of a movie.

Bird Box (2018)

Overhyped and not scary

[1/10 · 9 January 2019]

I just finished Bird Box and was left disappointed.

When I first heard about it, there was plenty of hype surrounding it, and I'm a fan of horror movies myself, so of course my expectations were pretty high.

So, of course, I watched it, and I was left disappointed and I had a few questions as well, which I'll get to in a moment.

First, let's start with the cast. Such an A-list cast could've done better. First, you have Sandra Bullock who got her start in the 90s. Then, you have others like The Predator's Trevante Rhodes, Con Air's John Malkovich, Bohemian Rhapsody's Tom Hollander, and Rosa Salazar who's starring in the upcoming Alita: Battle Angel. Honestly, such an A-list cast could've been much better.

Then, there's the premise. Although it seems somewhat similar to that of A Quiet Place or The Happening, it was a perfectly good premise that was wasted for a film like this.

Next, we have the dialogue. Most of it was predictable or out-of-place. Plus, the profanity just felt thrown in there in order to avoid a PG-13 rating.

Finally, the "creatures". I was expecting a big creature reveal at the end, but the creatures were never shown. Before I go on, I understand why they weren't shown because the filmmakers wanted to add a sense of mystery, and they also looked ridiculous. But, I'd rather have a ridiculous creature than no creature at all.

Speaking of the ending, it was too ambiguous for my liking, and I wish it wasn't just hashed in there. A school for the blind? It's smart and all, but it just felt thrown in there.

Earlier, I said that I had questions about the film, so here they are:

-Where did Lucy and Felix go? -What was the deal with Gary? -Why did the eyes of those who saw the creatures change? -How many creatures were there? -Where did the creatures come from? -Are any of Gary's drawings of the creatures accurate? -Why did Malorie's kids have no names until the final scene? -Where did those Marauders come from? -Why was a great cast wasted in this film? -Can I have my 2 hours back?

Overall, not that great of a film.

Split (IX) (2016)

James McAvoy succeeds in giving the most unnerving performance of his career

[10/10 · 16 September 2018]

I recently found time to watch M. Night Shymalan's latest entry, "Split", and I was totally blown away. McAvoy truly made the film blend together with each personality, each one becoming increasingly unnerving.

The supporting actors also did a good job on the film. Anya-Taylor Joy and Bruce Willis did a good job as well.

And, with each M. Night Shymalan film, there is the twist ending. And it is... that the movie is actually a sequel to Unbreakable.

The Greatest Showman (2017)

Think again, critics. This film is the greatest! (pun intended)

[10/10 · 28 August 2018]

I just finished watching The Greatest Showman, and I loved it. I was somewhat skeptical about it at first because of critic reviews, but I watched it anyways, and enjoyed every minute of it.

The songs were catchy, and I truly thought this movie was a remarkable sight for the eye to behold.

Hugh Jackman truly led the film to success due to his captivating performance as P.T Barnum, and once you have that, all you need is a great script, great songs, and a truly stellar cast.

As I said before, I was skeptical about watching the movie at first, but I can say without a doubt that the critics need to lighten up. Go watch this movie already. If not, you're wasting your own time.

Star Wars: Episode VIII - The Last Jedi (2017)

Was it better than The Empire Strikes Back? No. But it could've been a lot worse.

[6/10 · 29 July 2018]

I went to see The Last Jedi with high hopes and excitement after waiting for 2 years. Was I disappointed? Yes. Were some scenes unnecessary? Yes. Were there plot holes and uninteresting characters? Yeah, but this movie could have been a lot worse. At least J.J. Abrams is going to direct Episode IX.

Mamma Mia! Here We Go Again (2018)

"You know you can yell cut at any time."- Passport Checker

[9/10 · 28 July 2018]

What can I say? Well, first off, SPOILERS AHEAD! Second off, I loved this.

Before I go on, one last spoiler warning, so beware.

Still here? Great. I loved this. I thought it was nice to see everyone again (except... Donna), and I thought the younger versions of Harry, Bill, Sam, Rosie, and especially Tanya were spot on. I enjoyed the new additions of Ruby Sheridan, Fernando Cienfuegos, and the Passport Checker (wait until the end of the credits to see the best of him). I thought the addition of Bill's twin was a surprise to say the least.

I thought the songs were great, and for the second to last number, "My Love, My Life", I almost cried, but tried my best not to do so until older Donna left the church. That really got me good. Like I said before, wait until the end of the credits for more of the passport guy.

Anyways, I thought the cast pulled off great performances, and Cher and Andy Garcia had a truly surprisingly good chemistry together. Amanda Seyfried, Pierce Brosnan, Colin Firth, Stellan Skarsgård, Christine Baranski, Julie Walters, and Dominic Cooper all reprised their roles, and brought back the same characters they portrayed 10 years ago, and seemed like they had a blast while doing so.

Justice League: The Flashpoint Paradox (2013 Video)

A superb adaptation of a beloved DC storyline.

[10/10 · 11 July 2018]

Flashpoint was a 2011 crossover comic revolving around Barry Allen/The Flash going back in time to prevent his mother's murder, unaware of the consequences that would be in store (SPOILERS AHEAD):

1.)Bruce would be murdered instead of his parents, Martha would suffer an emotional breakdown and would become the Joker, and Thomas Wayne would become Batman.

2.) Kal-El would never meet the Kents, and would spend his life in a lab.

3.) The Atlanteans and the Amazons would be at war with each other, destroying the world along the way.

4.) The Flash wouldn't have his super-speed.

All of the details from the comic were adapted beautifully, the acting was done perfectly, and this is the best DC animated film since The Dark Knight Returns.

Interstellar (2014)

A truly incredible sight for the eye to behold. Well done, Nolan.

[10/10 · 10 July 2018]

Interstellar is a space epic that is a story about the strength of love. Christopher Nolan is famous for his cerebral stories and practical effect usage over CGI. Nolan is an expert when it comes to 3 things:

1.) Playing with our emotions.

2.) Casting his characters.

3.) Production values.

I also might add that I didn't mind the runtime at all. Hans Zimmer did an amazing score, and it will be ever so iconic in the future. And lastly, I cried my eyes out. Well done, Nolan.

Better Late Than Never (2016–2018)

This is the funniest show I have ever watched!

[10/10 · 7 July 2018]

I can't explain this show in words. Watch it for yourself.

Psych: The Break-Up (2014) Season 8, Episode 10

Come on, son!

[1/10 · 7 July 2018]

A very lackluster finale to an otherwise great television series.

Stranger Things: Chapter Seven: The Lost Sister (2017) Season 2, Episode 7

Felt like an out-of-place commercial break

[1/10 · 7 July 2018]

Don't get me wrong, I love this show, but this episode acted as more of a 40-55-minute commercial break, and absolutely nothing about it was interesting. This was out-of-place and boring.

Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice (2016)

The most misunderstood movie ever made

[10/10 · 7 July 2018]

There are no spoilers in this review, and I will be reviewing both theatrical and ultimate editions.

Theatrical: 7/10

There were some things missing from it, lots of unanswered questions throughout, such as Luthor in prison, why Clark said that name, etc.

Ultimate Edition: 10/10

All of my questions were answered, such as the prison scene and why Luthor was going berserk. This should've been in theaters.

Score: 37/10 Cast: 10/10 Tone: 10/10 Editing: 8/10 Ending: 10/10

Overall: 10.5/10

Avengers: Infinity War (2018)

The MCU's Dark Knight.

[10/10 · 7 July 2018]

I can't review this without spoiling it, so read at your own risk.

Still here? Okay. The first five minutes set the overall tone PERFECTLY. From Loki redeeming himself, and finally calling himself and Odinson, perfect. These 5 minutes are mostly predictable, but needed.

I was really caught off guard by Gamora's death, and I never saw that Red Skull cameo coming at all. The ending was absolutely emotional. It was unexpected and, honestly, really bleak. When Spider-Man died, I honestly haven't cried that much since I saw Interstellar.

Lastly, I have to applaud the cast and crew for keeping literally everything about the movie under wraps. Fake scripts were used, so nobody in the cast knew how the movie ended, not even RDJ. This movie is an absolute game changer, and I can't wait for Avengers 4.

Solo: A Star Wars Story (2018)

It was more of a generic sci-fi movie than a Star Wars movie

[7/10 · 7 July 2018]

WARNING: SPOILER ALERT FOR SOLO, but you're probably not missing out on much. Let's start from the production: Christopher Lord and Phil Miller were originally set to direct before being let go due to creative differences. Then, in came Oscar-winning director Ron Howard, who reshot 80% of the movie. Alden Ehrenreich was cast as the titular character, and he... was definitely the wrong choice. He was picked out of 2,500 other actors, and he blew it. He didn't look like Harrison Ford, nor did he have the mannerisms to be a proper Han Solo. Donald Glover was the only one who looked like the character he was supposed to play.

The tone was just too gritty, and I found myself saying "lighten up, will ya?". The surprise Darth Maul cameo definitely took me by surprise, but when I saw him, I was like "Hey, it's Red Skull", who appeared in Avengers: Infinity War one month prior. Finally, the ending was apparently supposed to set up sequels to this, and due to the "success" now I know they're probably not happening anytime soon, if at all.

All in all, Solo is definitely one to skip, so go see an actually original movie (good luck with that).