sechriwa Reviews

Germanikus (2004)

No No No.

[1/10 · 22 March 2004]

This is another horrible excuse for a "movie". If you saw the trailer, don't expect more - the only 3 jokes in the movie were contained in the trailer. Trying to catch the audience with heavy Bavarian dialect, this film about a lucky German who is sold as a slave in Rome is an awful rip-off of "Der Schuh des Manitu", another German comedy which features a lot of dialect. Whereas "Der Schuh des Manitu" is a funny parody of Western films and has some really decent scenes, the script of "Germanikus" is stupid, boring and lacks everything a comedy must have: jokes. Probably little children could enjoy this movie. The actors are mediocre at least, sometimes awful. The producers maybe thought they could make a lot of money with a movie that's a bit like "Der Schuh des Manitu". Germanikus is a waste of time and money. Avoid this mess at all costs.

We (2003)

Feeling aimless

[10/10 · 27 February 2004]

This movie is not really the German version of 'L'Auberge Espagnole' - 'Wir' is much darker and shows the other side of life after school. Whereas 'L'Auberge Espagnole' is a lovely comedy, 'Wir' is a drama. The characters are as interesting as in L'Auberge and definetely more complex. This is a movie about feeling aimless, somehow lost and very unsure what to do in the future. The soundtrack is excellent (2Raumwohnung...) and the acting is very good. There is no real plot, there are lots of different stories and sub-narratives which form a more or less chaotic and realistic image of Berlin's students and their problems with finding a meaning of life.

Autobahnraser (2004)

Probably the worst movie ever

[1/10 · 16 February 2004]

I am ashamed to be German - with this movie, it's official. This wannabe-rip-off "Fast and Furious" movie about fast cars and the German high ways ("Autobahnen") is horrible, awful, disastrous, boring and ridiculous. The characters seem to come directly from TV soap operas, there is absolutely no merely intelligent dialogue and the director seems to be replaced by a computer - the scenes were cut arbitrarily, acting is miserable and the plot is foreseeable and just plain stupid. I'm sure (and sad) that this film will find its audience in Germany (like Fast and Furious found its audience in the US - but Fast and Furious nevertheless had some style): the uneducated "lads" who firmly believe that their car is the artificial extension of their dick. Horrible movie, avoid at all costs.

Garage Days (2002)

Lovely and amusing movie

[10/10 · 2 February 2004]

Lovely characters, nice dialogues and plot which is not cliché-like at all! Don't take this movie seriously, it's all just fun! Oh, and the dance at the ending credits is the dance from the "lucky number nine" music video by The Moldy Peaches!! Just lovely, lovely, lovely!

Taxi 3 (2003)

Two good jokes

[5/10 · 3 November 2003]

Taxi 3 is a movie for 12-year old kids who like cars. They will enjoy this movie from beginning to end. But I only enjoyed two jokes: the smoking scene in the car and the drugstore owner's daughter. But the rest...average.

Bungalow (2002)

Hard to describe

[10/10 · 29 September 2003]

Bungalow definetely is one of the best German films I've ever seen, maybe even the best. But it is also a love-or-hate movie. I loved it for personal reasons and if you can't identify with one of the characters, you'll probably ask yourself what the director intended to show the audience or you'll simply find 'Bungalow' boring. For me, it wasn't. It felt like a longer version of Marcus Weiler's short 'Always crashing in the same car', a German version of Larry Clark's study of aimlessness and loneliless in 'Ken Park' or even a German version of Richard Kelly's masterpiece 'Donnie Darko' reduced to that feeling of being somehow lost, without a direction to follow that seems right.

The acting is brilliant and the (non-)dialogues are brilliant. If you are German and born in the 80s, maybe you'll love this movie. I was impressed. 10 out of 10.

Seabiscuit (2003)

Worst movie ever blablabla

[1/10 · 22 September 2003]

I just saw Seabiscuit at a preview show in Germany. At the end of the movie, people were clapping. But - patriots beware - it was highly ironical. You cannot image how my friends and I burst out in laughter during various stages. Really, this is a movie that it so bad that you cannot do anything else than laugh. Did the filmmakers take this movie seriously? I couldn't.

If you like horses or jockeys, or if you are a true American patriot, this movie is for you. In almost every other case, avoid it at any costs.

The 9-11 references are obvious. I don't have a problem with that, but the dull dialogues are extremely clichéd. They even reminded me of 'Pearl Harbour', that other movie I loved so much. (warning: irony). It seems obvious that a Hollywood movie such as this doesn't want to provoke (it's about horses, you know). However, the references to the American dream and christianity (the coin scene at the end) are so damn ridiculous and foreseeable. In several scenes, Jeff Bridges even looks like king George W. Bush the great master himself. The movie tries so hard to have depth, and it fails miserably. The movie definitely is destined at Bush-followers, but in this context, the history scenes that show the effects of the Great Depression and which praise the New Deal are out of place. If Bush, Cheney & co had lived during the FDR presidency, they would have attacked the New Deal as 'socialist policies' without a doubt. The pseudo-intellectual references to British and American literature are a desperate try to put some credibility in a story that is, over all, BORING. And it is way too long. I wished at so many points of the film that just something happens: an UFO landing, Godzilla or something. JUST SOMETHING! After going out of the cinema, I have to admit that I had the urge to eat some horse sausage. This movie is a good example of the mindless mainstream stuff that is not for people who actually want to THINK about the society they live in but for those who want to feel good, especially for themselves. I understand that a lot of Americans need that feeling after 9-11. But in liberal and left-leaning parts of the US and in most foreign countries, this movie will make people laugh at the ignorant and naive Americans who still believe in the perfect stereotpyical American dream - or it will make people cry in disbelief. However, leaving 9-11 behind, this is a well-made movie - for horse lovers.

Bully (2001)

Soul decay

[7/10 · 5 March 2003]

Bully is a mere description of suburban American teenagers without a soul and without a mind. Sometimes it's just unbearable to watch, the camera work sometimes is confusing and some dialogues are dull. But maybe Clark intended to do it this way. But, maybe it's Clark's most realistic movie. Whereas the characters in 'Kids' actually were human beings, worrying about themselves, the characters in 'Bully' don't have the ability to think for themselves or to feel human emotions. They are on drugs, not only alcohol, sex and weed, but they're also addicted - or heavily tied to - American suburban life: malls, middle class cars, stupid jobs. They don't have any ability to think BEYOND that lifestyle, and neither does the film. Some scenes with their parents are extremely strong. It's a sad film because I didn't think that the decay of American teenagers has advanced so rapidly. Not all of them of course, but the lifestyle portrayed in 'Bully' actually IS typically US-American.

En danger de vie (1997 TV Movie)

Drug drama

[8/10 · 23 February 2003]

'En danger de vie' is a fine drug drama dealing with the drug addiction of Jean-Luc, the teenage son to a disappointed cello player and a suicidal mother. One day, Guillard, a teenager without any serious drug problems saves Jacqueline, Jean Luc's mother, from committing suicide. Guillard wants to help her and becomes Jean-Luc's friend as he's exploring his drug addiction and the horrible problems that come along with it. The movie is a fine display of youth drug addiction in French middle class families. It's not that clichéd, the characters are credible and it's...realistic.

Always Crashing in the Same Car (2001)

Provoking short film attacking rich parents

[9/10 · 22 January 2003]

The three friends Janine, Tom and Pete have an unsatisfied need for their parents to love and see them. They do whatever it takes to get any reaction, even if it's not a loving one. They are teenagers, children of wealthy German middle and upper-class parents. They have everything they want in terms of money but their parents - with their helpless egoism - refuse to give them attention. Their reaction is extreme. Janine lies to her mother that her father abused her sexually, Tom provokes his parents by dressing as a woman and demanding a gender transformation. They are desperate to break through the liveless passitivity of their environment. In my opinion, their parents' reaction to these faked incidents is even more extreme.

The only negative point about this film is that it's only a short film. The script and the idea behind it is amazing and the social background is very realistic indeed. So why only 16 minutes? This could have been an amazing indie feature film.

Iqbal (1998 TV Movie)

Good subject, average movie

[7/10 · 14 October 2002]

Iqbal is about an Asian boy who gets sold by his father to a small carpentry production company in which child labour is supported. His "master" is a cruel man, imposing a ridiculous behaviour catalogue with strict charges. The children, about 5-10 years of age, have to work all day and they´re not allowed to go to toilet while at work, let alone visit their parents. Iqbal soon realizes that this is a massive injustice, especially when a member of the (unindentified) country´s Communist and Anti-child labour party takes photographs of the children. Iqbal manages to escape a few times and gets sold to another master as a consequence. However, he improves his working skills and gets a reputation as a hard-working rebel.

The movie Iqbal is a well made movie with a very important subject: Child labour in Third World countries. The acting -especially the child actors- is amazing but the plot isn´t as strong. Sometimes the dialogue lines are too cliché-like and a kind of simple. The movie is loosely based on a true story, but I guess there are a lot of other Iqbals in the world right now, fighting for Human Rights. I recommend the book No Logo by Naomi Klein on the subject.

Important subject, well-made but not really amazing movie.

7 out of 10 points.

Open Your Eyes (1997)

Amazing

[10/10 · 16 February 2002]

Abre los ojos is a true masterpiece. I really wonder WHY Hollywood had to make a remake. Every part of the film is so unique and fits perfectly to the story that it is really not necessary to make a remake. If you have the choice: Abre los ojos or Vanilla Sky, go and watch Abre los ojos. The story: genuine. every 15 minutes there is an amazing confusing twist that your own ideas what the truth might be always break together and you have to imagine new ones...the dialogues are so breathtaking...just compare what Pelayo said at the party and what César later says... The music: I recognized Smoke City´s Flying Away (party scene) and Massive Attack´s Risingson (disco scene). These two songs in fact are hints to the story. Just look at the chorus of Risingson...brilliant! The score itself is great, too. The actors: Absolutely excellent. Really, you cannot top them with someone like Tom Cruise. Overall, this is an amazing European film. Go and see it.

Pearl Harbor (2001)

War = Entertainment???

[1/10 · 30 June 2001]

I just got out of Pearl Harbor and, after already reading negative critics, I have to say that it`s worse than I have expected. Maybe because I´m European and not that pro-American (do I have to be?), I´m looking in an not that naive way on American history. After reading the great (American!) book "Lies my teacher told me" by James W. Loewen I have an impression how poorly the Americans deal with their own history and with the history of other nations. Pearl Harbor is just another example because it leaves out important facts and simply does not tell the true story. This movie is not controversial - as in my opionion a war movie should be - it just confirms the view of the general American audience. I heard that director Michael Bay said in an interview that he tried to treat the Japanese fairly and to make the audience understand why they attacked. Well, how he showed the Japanese (threatening, emotionless except some scenes, but in general, they´re the BAD!) confirms once more the image that the standard American has - the Japs are evil! By the way - during the attack on Tokyo show at the end of the movie - the Americans killed about 10 times as much people than the Japanese killed at Pearl Harbor. These are just the relations - the film does not show the terror and fear the Japanese people felt. Pearl Harbor lets the audience feel that that attack was right and that the Americans had the right to kill! I think the only wise sentence of the movie is spoken out by the Japanese admiral who says "A brilliant man will find a way not to fight a war." - this is so right for both the Japanese and the Americans. After all, all the comedy and the jokes made the film seem so ridiculous. I just cannot imagine that in the horror of war, someone can behave in such a way. A war film cannot be entertaining. I recommend the book "Empire of the Sun" by James Graham Ballard, and the film based on the novel by Steven Spielberg. It shows how war in the Far East was for millions of Chinese, Japanese, English and American: it was a war without good or bad and without any heroes. It was merely a fight for survival.