lacalguy Reviews

Blackout (IV) (2008)

boring

[2/10 · 26 January 2017]

I agree with another reviewer who said that the characters are flat and the characters are not engaging to the viewer. The screenplay is terrible. Don't waste your time with this film.

Films that take place in a short amount of time and confined location are interesting to me so the idea of people trapped in an elevator with a serial killer sounded attractive but this film could not keep my attention.

There are a lot better films available for your viewing time. See "Dinner Rush". One night in a restaurant and an interesting set of characters.

Submarine (2010)

Wanted to walk out

[1/10 · 20 June 2011]

Dear Mr. Aoyade: The hero in your film tells a victim of bullying that it will make her stronger. I can tell you for a fact Mr. Aoyade that bullying does not make you stronger. It destroys a person. It destroyed my life.

Your "hero" also says that during the two week romance with Jordana they picked on the weak. Oh, you must be a wonderful person to advocate for the harassment of those who can not stand up for themselves.

Tell us Mr. Aoyade, do you kick dogs? Do you advocate racial hatred? Do you beat your lovers? Do you smack children? These would seem to be characteristics that you find amusing based on the action of your "heroes".

Also, the movie wasn't funny.

If I hadn't arranged for a group to go see the film and felt a responsibility, a word whose meaning I'm sure is unfamiliar to you Mr. Aoyade, I would have walked out of the film in the first five minutes.

lacalguy

What Just Happened (2008)

It sucks

[1/10 · 21 August 2010]

While watching this movie I asked myself two questions, can Robert DeNiro do comedy and who directed this? I was surprised and shocked that Bary Levinson was the director. He must be doing drugs like his alter-ego in the film.

The real problem with the film is the script.To put it simply, the script sucks. Example: DeNiro calls his ex-wife and she gets upset. They almost slept together in the morning and now she gets all upset because he calls her. Why? John Turturro, who I have never liked, plays a ridiculous character, totally unbelievable as a Hollywood agent. Catherine Keener gives a bland performance. No way is she believable as the head of a movie studio.

This film looks like it was directed by someone just out of film school and who got all F's, which is what I give this film, an F.

Public Enemies (2009)

I'd pass

[3/10 · 7 July 2009]

"Public Enemies" is what I would call "a typtical Hollywood film." Typical in that it glorifies the criminal and makes the cops out to be mean and vicious.

Like Mann's "Heat", we supposed to feel sympathy for the criminal because he can't be with the women he loves Kilmer/Judd and Depp/Cotillard,, who by the way, in my humble opinion is average lucking and nothing to write home about look wise. Well, let me tell you, here's a good way to assure that you spend the rest of your life with the person you love, "don't commit a crime." After seeing this film, a friend of mine said that Dillinger is "only" credited with filling four four people. Well, I think the friends, relatives, and children of those "four" people wouldn't think Dillinger a saint. And what about the other people that Dillinger may not have killed but were killed by others during one of his "fold-ups"? Today, Dillinger would be just as responsible as the person who pulled the trigger. However, according to Mann, we're supposed to feel empathy for a a criminal who kills, robs, shoots, and, well, is not the kind of guy you bring home to granny for dinner. Let's stop glorying the criminal and stop villianize the cops and maybe, just maybe, the world would be a better place.

On the technical side, TOO many close-ups, Bale is flat and could have been portrayed by any level of actor, in some case better, and Depp and the other actors are good.

Want to restore sanity to the world? Stop making the bad guys good and good guys bad and revert to the truth. Dillinger would kill you at the drop of hat if you got in his way, the police will risk their life's to save you. FYI, Michael.

Taken (I) (2008)

Absolutely terrible

[1/10 · 27 June 2009]

I don't know what movie the other commentors who gave this film a favorable rating were watching, but it wasn't the one I saw. The opening dialogue between Neeson and the shop store owner made me want to puke. The storyline that Neeson's ex-wife married a rich, rich man is so old and worn out it wouldn't clean the puke that came out of my mouth watching this garbage.

Next, Neeson's daughter gets a pony from her step-father? Yeah, it's horse not a pony, but all I could think of watching this dribble is that a 17 year-old is excited about getting a pony. At 17, she's into boys and cars, not ponies. Also, the daughter wants to be a singer, so what happens? Neeson's buddies that night talk him into body guarding a rock singer and someone tries to kidnap the singer, which Neeson prevents. How convenient.

Everyone is rich in this film, except poor Liam. Neeson's wife's new husband, his daughter's girlfriend and her relatives. If you're going to kidnap someone for sex slavery, don't kidnap the rich, kidnap the poor. The rich have resources to hire people to come after you.

Neeson's a good actor, but sometimes he fails to deliver lines with the proper emphasis. "It was a trailer, not a building." Delivered totally flat.

Further, he shows up at the hideout impersonating a French detective and speaking in his Americanized accent. Uh, are we supposed to believe the bad guys actually thought he was French? The most interesting character in the film was the translator and he was only on screen for a few minutes.

Luc Besson has always been a disappointment to me and once again he shows me why. OK, the actions scenes are pretty good, but not worth the time watching this film if you like good cinema.

Every Little Step (2008)

Great. I loved it.

[8/10 · 18 April 2009]

I saw "A Chorus Line" on Broadway in the early 80's and didn't like the play. The movie, with Michael Douglas, is terrible. However, being a Cinophile, I was interested in seeing a film about the trials and tribulations of performers auditioning for a part.

The film had a good balance of the history of the play, the past performers and performances, and the new hopefuls. It was interesting to see that the audition process, with callbacks, went on for months. From the start, you can see the long odds against a performer being chosen. Three thousand people competing for thirty opportunities.

I laughed, cried, cheered, and felt the heartache of those who pursued their dreams. Happily, I would see the film again.

This Film Is Not Yet Rated (2006)

What a disappointment

[1/10 · 28 January 2009]

I heard about this documentary and being a film buff was anxious to see it. What a disappointment. It is downright awful. A documentary is supposed to be balanced. This film does not show the side of the MPAA. During the documentary the private detectives hired to find out who are the MPAA raters, start to speak about how they met and about being lesbians. What does the sexuality of the detectives have to due with the methods of the MPAA? The investigation of the detectives rises to the point of invasion of privacy.

Wayne Kramer, the director of "The Cooler" makes a lot of comments about how the MPAA functions, comments in the negative context. He seems to state that the MPAA is too conservative when it comes to sexual content of films and how his film received difficulty in obtaining an other than NC-17 rating because of pubic hair being displayed in the film. One problem with this, "The Cooler" is a terrible movie. It is predictable to the point of being painful. The whole group with whom I saw "The Cooler" left the viewing moaning in sadness at having wasted two hours of our lives. Mr. Kramer would be wiser to spend his time learning how to make a decent movie and not being concerned with the procedures of the MPAA.

I found it interesting that most of the filmmakers that appear in the documentary are gay/lesbian. What's with that? Except for Kimberly Peirce, most to the directors, including John Waters, haven't made a decent movie. OK, Waters made "Cry-Baby" but he also made "Cecil B. Demented". 'Nough said.

The people who made and appear in this project would have better spent their time going back to film school and learning how to make a quality film rather than throwing stones at the MPAA.

"The Cooler" and "This Film is Not Yet Rated" time spent watching dribble. Time I will never get back. Don't fall into the same trap.

You Don't Mess with the Zohan (2008)

What you would expect

[6/10 · 8 June 2008]

This film is exactly what I would expect; funny, and way, way, way over the top. That's OK because it is exactly what I expected it to be. I've never been an Adam Sandler fan nor detractor.

Here's my one criticism. This film is supposed to be a reconciliation between the Jews and Palestinians; ie, we're all the same, we're all looking to be who we want to be, love who we want, and have peace between you and me. However, every major character is played by a Jew. From John Turturro, who I have never liked, to Emmanuelle Chriqui, and Rob Schneider. Why not let the Palestinians be played by Palestinians? If that had occurred, then it would truly have been a we are the same film. Rather than, I'll say we are the same but I'll have all the people who belong to the same church as I play all the parts. Does the work hypo-critic appear in the film?