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ElCinefago
Reviews
Bones and All (2022)
Interview with the Cannibal
Other reviews will try to tell you about how this film is about cannibals. It isn't, it is another entry in the ever-changing vampire sub-genre of horror films.
The movie revolts around the idea of solitude in a world that seems to the protagonist as cruel, horrifying and scary as she outwardly seem to be. This film is a pure road movie where you will meet some unusual characters.
The Cannibals share more few traits with Rice's bloodsuckers and, interestingly, with the immortals in Highlander (1982) too than with aborigine Cannibals from a lost tribe in the Amazon.
I hope you don't read any synopsis or reviews If you're going to watch this film. I feel it'd ruin the experience of watching it for you.
Enjoy this film and open your mind on this journey. It'll be so worth it!
The Completely Made-Up Adventures of Dick Turpin (2024)
Fun Fantasy-Adventure series with a touch of Boosh
As a fantasy fan (in my forties) I have naturally become very cautious when it comes to fantasy adaptations (2 good out of 100 usually).
I also should say that if you're a fan of The Mighty Boosh you're going to enjoy this show very much. It has the charm, the wittiness and the charisma of that series and a few of its actors too. Fielding does Arian a great job at playing his character (basically Vince Noir but in a sort of D&D setting) and everyone really does a great job at making it all quite cohesive.
This show will make you grin and laugh many times. The production level is excellent, the photography beautifully done and the acting is just spot on.
Open your mind a bit and don't compare it to the old series, it has NOTHING to do with it, and that is good.
Just allow your inner child a bit of fun and you'll love this series.
Watchmen (2009)
Great graphic adaptation, poor narrative.
Graphically Snyder's watchmen is brilliant, from faithful costumes (not only the supes) to atrezzo and even camera work to reflect the panels found in the original comic (yes, comic, not graphic novel).
The use of the photography is almost perfect, the imitation of the composition and light is just a carbon copy of the original comic.
However, it seems to be missing a lot of the small details that help the characters truly tell you what they feel or think. It's like any other Snyder film, it makes a coffee but it has the ability to only show you the froth and not the content.
His characters are faded and weak impersonations of what you will find in the pages of the comic-book. I urge anybody to read it.
This film is entertaining and that's about it, the more I watch it the more I feel it misunderstood the comic. It manages to revert Watchmen to what I was trying not to be a simple action Superhero film.
Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania (2023)
Ant-Man (but lost in Space really)
Unpretentious fun addition to the MCU catalogue which set ups the next great saga which is still yet to come.
It is understandable that some people felt let down, but not every film with a big bad needs or can be infinity war. This film it's just a fun setup for things to come.
Creatively and graphically the film is a mixture of the works of Moebius, Star Wars and Lost in Space, and yet it feels like it's own thing. Kang it's played gracefully and powerfully by Majors who lends his imposing physique to the character.
This film it's just a fun adventure with great writing that knows doesn't need to be a world changing event (not yet) but that needs to convey the dire consequences of its resolution.
Go to the cinema to have fun and meet Kang, it'll all be okay.
Also, the being with holes was hilarious.
O Apóstolo (2012)
An animated horror fantasy in Spain
The atmosphere of this film will take you to the magic lands of Galicia and will show you the tales and folklore of the northernmost region of Spain.
Brilliantly animated it seeks to transport you to a classic horror tale as if a hammer film production would appear before your eyes. It truly captures the folklore and classic horror tales that have existed in Spain for centuries.
The story follows a thief who's looking for a little town where he means to steal a few jewels to find a better life. However he'll find himself in various horrible situations.
It's not a big budget film, don't think they had as much money as Disney does, and yet is tremendously romantic and beautiful.
Give it a go, it's quite unique!
Veneciafrenia (2021)
Don't believe the haters
Thoroughly enjoyable, fun and very dark film.
The film follows a bunch of young tourists from spain as they venture in the magic and mysterious streets of Venice.
The film will have you laughing quite a few times but also it'll have you rooting for the main characters, who will become very human and close to your heart.
The photography and production design is superb as well as its original soundtrack.
Cosimo Fusco, the main antagonist plays two different characters and it's just delicious.
This is a great film that seems half role play game and half slasher. Contains elements of classic Italian and Spanish horror films.
Date to watch it, I promise it won't bore you at all.
The Northman (2022)
Don't believe the naysayers, it's a masterpiece
It's a very long film, it can feel a little slow at times. But don't be discouraged, this is a fantasy film that will take you to the heart of Scandinavian mythology. Violence beautifully crafted.
It just happens that some people only want hyper active films. Allow yourself to take a journey in time abs myth.
You'll love it.
Army of the Dead (2021)
Great idea, boring execution, welcome to Snyderverse
Fifteen minutes in and I am already on my phone texting, 30 min later and I am finishing an illustration.
Obviously beautifully shot, but as ever shallow story, hyper predictable plot, flat characters and boring as heck.
Every shot has been over-digitalised, even the smoke in cigars, the camera out of focus and the feeling that you're watching a car commercial don't help at all.
Once more Snyder demonstrates he knows how to direct a tv add but he doesn't understand cinema is a language. He visualices movies as if they were singles static shots and do not understand cinema needs much more than that.
Another proof of this is that he casts actors for their looks, but most times they fail to be able to portray their characters.
You can swap your brain for a watermelon while watching this movie, you won't find any difference.
Jupiter's Legacy (2021)
Great Superhero take about a broken family
It does feel a little Shakespearean, the only negative thing I have to say about this show is the make up and suits design is a little underwhelming. Acting is great, the casting is superb and the story is faithful to the comics for the most part.
If you expect an action pact superhero flick this is not for you. Let's all remember this is a family drama where people happen to have superpowers. However if you give it a little of your time it'll suck you in.
Enjoy!
The Mitchells vs the Machines (2021)
Perfect animated film for the whole family
Beautiful animation combining 3D and manual (still digital probably) painting techniques. Production design absolutely gorgeous and you can tell immediately it's from the studio of Spiderverse.
The script is brilliant and funny, it'll make you laugh quite a few times.
What are you waiting for, just watch it!
:)
Beowulf (2007)
Beautiful Neil Gaiman script not so good graphics
I do not understand to this day how this film is not considered one of the best fantasy films in the history of cinema.
Beowulf does not only take us on a trip to a fantastic adventure, but it takes time to speak of power and the cost men are willing to pay for it. This is not a simple shallow movie with monsters and fantasy clichés, it's instead a film written by Neil Gaiman, who is an expert in Norse mithology and the great themes which ancient mythos explore.
Alas, the graphics of the film are not the best, however it may be like a comic book that does not have the best artist, but that does have the best story to tell.
Do not take this film for granted and make sure to watch it in the dark, with good sound or headphones as you submerge yourself into the Middle Ages. When Britain was slowly leaving the Viking gods in exchange for the one Christian deity.
Enjoy your trip to greatness!
The Nun (2018)
Beautiful scenery and visual horrible story
As mentioned by the director this film based its visuals on the legendary hammer horror films from the 50s, 60s and 70s, and you can tell throughout the film. Unfortunately this is the only interesting and good thing about this film. The story is nonsensical, almost childish. The scares are based on clichés and are alien to the story. The characters aren't developed in any real way, there isn't any rhythm to the the film at all. There's never tension or anxiety to feel for the characters and worst of all, it is horribly boring and laughable.
It's such a shame because they could have build a new type of Freddie Krueger character, instead, they killed any opportunity for The Nun to have a good story.
Wish James Wan would have helmed this garbage ...
Akelarre (2020)
Beautiful, terribly sad infuriating and powerful.
You will be taken back to the 1600s in Spain. The acting is impecable, sublime and evoking. The photography is like that of an oil painting and the music is involving and delicious.
This is a film that will make you think throughout the movie, it's not a comfortable movie to watch, however I feel it's a movie many people need to watch.
Allow yourself to submerge in a journey to the Middle Ages where women where considered dangerous, mainly by religious leaders. It will remind you of many situations that we see still to this day in our societies.
This film is a masterpiece, for what it says, for what it hides and for what entails.
Grease 2 (1982)
Possibly the worst film I've ever watched
Plot that doesn't make sense, flat characters that don't develop at all. Characters jump from scene to scene without any sense whatsoever. The music is terribly bland and soulless. The only decent thing is the acting by Michele pfeifer. This movie should be in the list of terrorist organisations.
Lastly, the subtext of the film, in order to get your girl you don't need her approval, the permission that matters is that of the man that things he "owns" her.
If I ever go to hell the soundtrack to this movie will be playing on repeat mode.
Car Masters: Rust to Riches (2018)
Art, fun and camadery!
I am 38, I don't even have a driving license and I am so badly in love with this show. Maybe the reason as to why I don't drive is because cars don't look like the use to. This show is incredible, funny, artistic and it hooks you like heroine!
Cell (2016)
I really enjoyed this psychological horror
This is not 28 days later, there aren't any zombies. However, it builds atmosphere and the story it's interesting. I don't think it's a bad movie, it's worth a watch. I discovered it in 2017 thanks to a girlfriend and I really enjoyed it :)
Hellboy (2019)
Soulless adaptation that lacks atmosphere and personality.
I feel Neil Marshall's only proper cinematic accomplishment has been "Dog Soldiers". In this adaptation of hellboyve manages again to pull out a poorly written script mixed with less than ambitious imagery.
It's a shame they haven't realised yet Hellboy should be a Tales of the Crypt type of film. Different tales within a film. Del Toro's almost worked perfectly. This one it's not even worth the ticket price, however low it may be.