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Reviews
The Hateful Eight (2015)
A game of Mafia but with a great cast!
Why are people complaining about the movie being slow and/or being in one place? Quentin Tarantino fans would know that all his movies are "slow" and this isn't the first time he makes a movie which takes place in one spot (Reservoir Dogs).
Not only is the setting perfect, the characters are so well thought out and backed with a strong dialogue/story that they leave you constantly confused as to who the imposter is. Also, for anyone complaining about the characters being unlikable, that is the whole point! There is no one person to root for as they are all cynical liars from which the audience is left to guess.
This is a movie for true fans of the mystery genre. I can't seem to understand why people gave it so much hate as I personally enjoyed every second of it and wished it was longer just to keep myself guessing the plot twist.
Bone Tomahawk (2015)
Boring Tomahawk
Forget the borefest and plot holes... am I the only person who was irritated by the incompetent directing? The shots/edits/sequences/sound effects were terrible and felt unnatural (far below average). The movie did not flow smoothly, and the horrendous dialogue by our one-dimensional characters did not help either.
Despite all that, I still kept watching and had hope in the troglodytes and gore. But after 2 hours of nothing, I was further disappointed by the lame cave-dwellers as they did not strike me as terrifying nor brutal - they were stupid and slow.
I do not understand how this movie got such high ratings (most likely because of the cast), and why many are complaining about it being gruesome and excessively violent. With the exception of one scene which only men would sympathize with, every other death was normal. We didn't even get to see them properly eat anyone.
Joker (2019)
How DC movies should be
Forget about the critics! They always bash DC for being too 'dark' and, in this case, for promoting violence and mental illness.
Enough with the lame joke-infested Marvel type of movies targeted towards kids. The world needs to appreciate the more serious movies that tend to focus on crucial cinematic elements (in particular, plot and character development).
This film is no where close to boring as it really shows you the Joker's transition whilst emitting a disturbing vibe that will leave you cringing simply from Joaqin's phenomenal acting.
Ad Astra (2019)
Extremely Disappointing
A movie that tries to convince you it is more than what it actually is - a borefest attempting to create a sophisticated plot through vague and nonsensical narration that is supposedly backed by a deeper meaning.
I can't even remember the last time I fell asleep this many times during a movie.
Ready or Not (2019)
Trash
Not gonna lie, the concept seemed interesting and original with potential. However, execution was terrible. It starts off well with proper horror vibes that kept me on the edge of my seat right until the first 'accidental' death of one of the maids. It was at this point that I knew it was going downhill. By the time they got to the third maid's death, I was ready to leave.
The excessive comic relief scenes were completely unnecessary and made me cringe. I still don't get how/why movies try to incorporate comedy in horror films because they're two conflicting genres that defeat each other's purpose. What's worse is that the characters were extremely unfunny and the deaths were ridiculous, therefore taking away the fright factor (if it existed).
But the worst part has got to be the ending. So they were right all along and as a result, they all died in a comical way? Ha ha? We barely got to see any kills in the movie. Why kill all these characters in one stupid scene instead of using them to make a good horror film with several separate deaths.
Overall, the movie was absolute garbage. Seemed like a mix of Get Out and the Cabin in the Woods but A LOT worse. All the high ratings are probably from teenagers or people with low IQs that find comedic horror films 'entertaining'.
American Psycho (2000)
A movie that gets better every time you watch it.
There aren't enough words to describe this masterpiece.
11/10
Black Mirror: Metalhead (2017)
Absolute Garbage
For an episode that is only 40 mins long, it sure felt like one of the longest Black Mirror episodes. With no background (except for that short and vague dialogue we occasionally get), we are left to figure out the story behind this tedious episode ourselves which seems like a lame excuse for the writers to let the viewers do their work for them.
So why were these "dogs" created? Assuming they are some military weapons that went rogue, how difficult is it for mankind to take on these toasters? Seems like two bullets with a shotgun would do the job. Also, these things can literally do everything from hunting to driving cars, but can't climb trees?
Putting aside the plot holes and the stupid decision-making of our characters, the ending is by far the worst part. Are we supposed to feel empathetic towards these other characters that we know so little about? Really? Three people died over a teddy bear. I hope that kid is happy now.
Anyone who liked this episode probably liked it for the sake of the whole series.
Once Upon a Time in... Hollywood (2019)
Ignore the bad reviews
Whilst this movie isn't the typical Tarantino-styled movie that you would expect, it is nothing less than a masterpiece. Anyone complaining about the movie being 'too slow' or 'boring' is either a hater of Tarantino, or simply has the IQ of a 12-year-old.
A real movie enthusiast would appreciate how such a simple story with the perfect setting can be turned into a a fiesta of entertaining events. Thanks to the fantastic script and the phenomenal acting (coming from loveable characters), I personally enjoyed the movie and savored every second of it.
Crawl (2019)
Extremely Unrealistic
I know it's a movie, but part of what makes a thriller/horror movie good and scary is its believability. It's hard to take things seriously when you know both main characters have plot armor considering the amount of bites and fatal wounds each got but still managed to survive under such circumstances.
The worst thing about the movie is that they had to Americanize it with the dog, which of course, cannot be remotely hurt for the sake of the movie's success; otherwise they'd have to pull a John Wick and make a sequel entirely about seeking revenge for their dog. The guy literally lost his arm for a dog which ended up untouched as opposed to the protagonists.
Overall, it was a decent movie that is worth watching if you like being kept on the edge of your seat. It also had some pretty gruesome deaths which made it entertaining.
The Lion King (2019)
Stop supporting these unnecessary remakes!
People should really stop praising all these remakes, live-action reboots, and sequels/prequels.
We haven't had a proper original movie in so long and it's pathetic how fans are being exploited for their money. While I understand the nostalgia aspect, nothing will ever make you feel the same way the classics did and there's no denying that.
Maybe it's time to leave the past behind and stop funding these pointless movies so we can actually get fresh ones to build new memories from.
You're Next (2011)
Positive reviews are probably from friends and family
This is not your typical b-class slasher film - it's far worse. Everything you can expect from a low-budget movie that is filmed in a basement by a group of teenagers is found here.
The movie is comprised of an abundance of clichés, unbearable filming (using a handheld camera), a terrible script, horrible acting, obnoxious characters, unnecessary scenes, and completely irrational/unrealistic reactions.
But I guess all that is expected considering the writer's embarrassing filmography. What makes it worse is the fact that he couldn't decide on how to conclude the movie and so goes with the typical low-class horror movie ending where it ends with an unoriginal death scene that leaves the story somewhat open (with credits rolling straight after).
You're Next really set a new level of low to the horror/thriller genre. To top it all, its astonishing positive reviews simply reaffirm that thrillers must lack intelligence to succeed.
P.S. I still don't understand why the movie was given its title as it had no relevance to the story.
Game of Thrones: The Iron Throne (2019)
Pathetic
I'm just here to join the crowd of angry fans leaving bad reviews.
Avengers: Endgame (2019)
Terrible excuse for a movie
The fact that this movie still has a 9.2 rating really says a lot about the fans. They must either be 10, or have extremely low movie standards.
Also, the unnecessary and overwhelming immature jokes gave me cancer.