jpdhadfield Reviews

Another Stakeout (1993)

another farce

[1/10 · 8 May 2021]

I loved 'stake out', ive watched it so often i know the script, so when i saw 'another stakeout' on telly ,i thought great, but couldnt remember the script at all,of course i only watched it once back in the day, becasue its a mess.

Its like the actors were asked' what would you like in the film?'' and so we got this mess, i had no idea what was going on, i thought the neighbours were mafia dons,i didnt know why the loud obnoxious odonell woman was there and why were they in such a fancy place? A farce in the worst way.

I wouldnt recomend anybody to this film. Id give it 0 stars if i could.

The Drowning (2021)

dreadful , truly dreadful script. an insult to the viewers inteligence

[1/10 · 4 February 2021]

SPOILER ALERT

i watched the entire series, hoping it would redeem itself, and make some sense. But no ,it just got madder, enormous chasms of plot holes, unbeleivable things happened. For example all staff in any school are checked, all qualifications, , CRB, and then it takes weeks untilthe job starts. nobody can walk into any school. Before that she parked her car outside the school. no, that never happens, for good reason. Also she was a gardner who had thousands in the company bank acount!, also what was the side story of the illegal immigrant employee and the comic book villains. And the end was the worst bit, are we supposed to beleive the boy would drown without making a splash when his uncle was just standng there,

channel five must think its viewers are brain dead.i wouldnt recommend this program to anybody, its rubbish.

The Gentlemen (2019)

a good british gangster film

[7/10 · 22 May 2020]

I liked this film, its not as good as 'snatch' but close,i just felt it dragged a bit,i ofund myself day dreaming, then woke up and came back, not a good sign for a film, i can watch 'snatch ' over and pver, but i wont watch this again, it reminded meof 'layer cake' some very funny bits, and shocking action. SPOILER ALERT!!!!. there is no way he could grow skunk under ground and make a profit, the electric bill would be enormous, also his staff all seemed happy, they would all have to be enslaved immigrants, was micky a real gangster? not really. a few other plot holes, hence 6 /10

Yesterday (III) (2019)

very good fun film about love and music

[10/10 · 9 February 2020]

I loved this film,i was toldit wasnt so good by mates,but they are wrong its great, id happily watch it again many times, its full of music, funny stories, the fact that nobody knows who the beatles are ,is good for alot of laughs, and the almost love story, had me in tears many times. its also quite unique,in i havent seen a film with this idea before, so i was intrigued as to what would happen and wasnt able to guess befor eit happend,so lots of surprises. what more can i say, if you like fun and love and music, then this is th eiflm for you.

Zombieland: Double Tap (2019)

dreadful rubbish nothing like first film

[1/10 · 20 October 2019]

I was so looking forward to seeing this film, i was dissapointed in first scene, it was just tired joke after tired joke,i kept thinking.''oh it must get better'' but it just got worse, i wont put any spoilers, as the entire film is a spoiler, There is no plot no reason for the film at all,the same two people laughed out loud at the lame teenage jokes, whilst rest of cinema was silent, and we all left quickly at end. dont go and see this pile of excrement. i d give it zero stars if that was possible, how it can have so many good reviews i will never know,,

Green Room (2015)

punk rockers fight skinheads in this blood bath

[8/10 · 4 July 2018]

I read lots of bad reviews about this film, before i saw it, so didn't have high hopes, but i really enjoyed it. I was wanting to know how they were going to escape, and enjoyed the action some of the gore was too much and i had to look away, basic premise ,punks fight skinheads in building. in order to escape them.lots of gore, fights ,shooting, just what you want,some punk songs. if your expecting the expendables budget you will be dissappointed, but if you like a horror/action film, you'll enjoy it

The Escort (1999)

an interesting story about a man who becomes an escort by chance and the consequences

[10/10 · 10 March 2018]

I loved this film, i saw it years ago by chance on telly, then again on dvd now, i still like it a lot, its unpredictable, shows a world most people don't know about.It funny in places,there is drama,its filmed form a french perspective , based in london. This gives it something extra, and despite the trailer its not about sex or escorts, its about people and relationships, life and the mess we can create in it. so if you want to see lots of wild sex, this film isnt for you, but if you like drama , then it might do

Howl (I) (2015)

british werewolves attack passengers on a train

[8/10 · 25 February 2018]

I found this film by chance, and was very pleased, asi like werewolves and i like trains. spoiler alert. this film is simple, but effective, follows the myth of the were wolf, loosely, but to good effect, its as good as dog soldiers ,which also like, has many different characters who react in different ways, not always predictable. well filmed, didnt feel cheap and the acting is good for a horror film,i plan to buy the dvd, to keep it in my collection

Blade Runner 2049 (2017)

very long boring plotless mumbled film

[2/10 · 19 February 2018]

I was looking forward to this sequel as i had liked first blade runner film,, so i excused the slow start and mumbled speech, but it never improved, got worse,i had no idea what was going on, or why things happened, it felt like an art house film from the 1970's, how it gets high marks ill never know, its got none of the excitement felt in the first film, much too much CGI, which is obvious. i wouldn't recommend this borefest to anybody

The Pacific: Melbourne (2010) Season 1, Episode 3

unrealistic portrayal of Greek Australian women in 1941

[2/10 · 26 November 2017]

i love the series, very good, but this episode got on my nerves, as it was so unrealistic of women in 1941 in Australia. SPOILER ALERT!!!They didn't sleep around at all,and lackeys girl is Greek also,their is no way she would sneak into his room in her own house, no way, she would have no idea what to do, certainly wouldn't have stripped in front of him, I've never had that happen to me now, let alone then, they may have had a relationship and may have slept together eventually, but not in that way.reputation was everything in those days.and there was no birth control so she would get pregnant for sure, her family would disown her, it wouldn't be accepted now in a Greek family let alone then .

The State (2017– )

interesting drama about British citizens joining ISIS

[8/10 · 25 August 2017]

Many of the negative reviews of this film, complain it wasn't graphic enough,it was on channel four, public broadcast television, not cable or in the cinema, so their are strict rules on what can or cannot be shown, I think they did a good job, of showing exactly how awful ISIS really are, And how living in that society would be impossible for sane people. the four protagonists were naive in joining, which is shown with one of them bringing a pink wheeled suitcase in stead of a black backpack.I think it was well paced,.dealt with each character equally, i never felt sorry for any of them, but i could see the predicament they were in. There was quite a lot of inferred violence which was enough, there was no need for slasher style violence, a la game of thrones,as other reviewers seemed to want,this film may go along way to deterring other fools from joining. There really haven't been enough programs or films about this subject, hopefully more will follow this

Dunkirk (2017)

A Mish-mash of a film, disappointing

[4/10 · 30 July 2017]

This film was filmed amazingly, but that's where my praise end. SPOILER ALERT> From the first scene it showed no character depth whatsoever, we had no idea who they were, nothing, they all get killed,by running down an open street, one gets away, our so called main character,he forgets his comrades instantly and moves on, the whole film is like this. None of the soldiers smoked, not one, nobody swore, no banter nothing, they were like robots. The highlights, the spitfire pilots the small boat crew, they saved the film for me.

On that day 300,000 troops were on the beach, where were they, a few hundred didn't give the right atmosphere, they could have used CGI i wouldn't have minded,it didn't feel epic, and it is an epic story many of the other review on here, seem to either be written by people involved in the making of the film or just people writing about the actual Dunkirk story. but this website is for film reviews, not history reviews.

If you didn't know the story, and went to see this film, you would be non the wiser at the end. So now there will be thousands of teenagers with a very strange view of Dunkirk and the British military.

I'd like to know where were the sergeants barking orders, corporals where were they, no just sullen silent privates, It was filmed very well, especially the spitfire dog fights , and tom hardy was great as usual, as were the other pilots, If you want to see a good film about Dunkirk ,watch the 1950's film,

The Numbers Station (2013)

well paced thriller

[8/10 · 30 June 2017]

i liked this film, it was about something id never heard of before,which is always good,and to have a large part of it based in Britain was nice, my reason for giving it 8 and not 10, is SPOILER ALERT: plot holes, such as in Britain if you arrive at a hospital with gun shot wounds carrying a gun and crash into cars, the police are called, and would hang around until you woke up,as its a rare event,and they would have confiscated his gun. SPOILER ALERT. also if there is a giant explosion any where, either the police or military police would attend, pretty quickly, or fire fighters,or just local people.as Britain really isn't big enough to have middle of no where places. but besides that, i liked it,

Train to Busan (2016)

frantic. fast moving zombie film, with twists and style

[10/10 · 7 May 2017]

i loved this film, fast moving zombies, lots of biting, scary, had me shouting at the screen, ''run run run'', The train situation was great, as they are trapped, claustrophobic, and yet escape is possible,. All the actors did great job,some with comic aplomb. The little girl is an amazing actress. do admit in some places it slowed down, when you would think it would keep racing, with sentimental and melodramatic moments, i guessed these were Korean film culture.but they still added to the anxiety. This film takes zombie films forward,. further then zombie land did, it makes walking dead look amateur. i would recommend this film to anybody except maiden aunts and sissies

A Cure for Wellness (2016)

a self indulgent mess

[3/10 · 26 February 2017]

i was looking forward to seeing this film, as the trailer and premise sounded good, and Celia Imrie is in it. It started good, but half way through it dragged for along time, with parts of it where i nearly fell asleep (something i rarely do in cinemas).I was confused often, which can be good, but not in this film,i really had no idea what was going on, and i didn't like any of the main characters. The end was a furious mishmash , almost like an entirely different film, with a Draculesque theme. If you like art films,directionless films,or lengthy periods of actors staring off into space, then this is the film for you. But if you want a story,with characters you can connect with don't watch this, i wanted to like it, but i couldn't, everybody in the cinema left as soon as it ended.

Gods of Egypt (2016)

great film, one fo the best I've seen in the genre this year

[8 January 2017]

i got this film for Christmas, just got around to watching it, i loved it, great fun, and educational, i learned a lot about Egyptian gods, and enjoyed the rollicking ride of a story,it reminded me of Jason and the Argonauts, or the titans, a sort of epic film, which used used CGI for its intended purpose to show scenery which would be impossible to produce . i enjoyed it so much i looked up Horus et al in my encyclopedia ( a book thing with lots of information in it). if you like action films, based on mythology, love stories, and comedy, well you'll like this. Is it accurate who knows, as from what i could acertain from the encyclopedia there are many myths using the same gods, from different eras of Egyptian mythology.But id recommend this movie

Super 8 (2011)

a really good fun film

[9/10 · 6 August 2016]

i hadn't heard of this film and saw it on cable, from the off i liked it,films with kids in them as the main character always get my attention when i was young and still do. i read some bad reviews of this film, so was a little wary, but i son realized they must be trolls,as this film keeps you watching,even before anything really happens, the kids are great actors. This film isn't realistic as it involves aliens etc..once you understand that then you can enjoy it,its very Steven Spielberg, which i like,lots of effects a unusual story, monsters, laughs, a bit of sorrow. as its based in 1979 they use music from them, and jokes about stuff like Walkmans etc..all in all i liked it, it has a few swear words in it, so maybe not for little ones. i liked it and luckily i taped it so i can watch it again tomorrow.

Die Hard 2 (1990)

utter pony

[1/10 · 16 April 2016]

just watched die-hard what a load of pony, god stunts, acting not bad, some comedy, plot ridiculous, handled ridiculously. SPOILER ALERT 1, they would have diverted all the planes to other airports 2. the airport police would have taken a shoot out very seriously. 3.the so called special forces would have had berets in exactly the same style, 4, the baddies would have hired the church, not squatted in it ( anything could have gone wrong). 5, the airport could have used generators on wheel to power up the lights, 6.where did the baddies think they would fly to, where, ? 7. there would have been hundreds of fbi. army soldiers there, not 20. 8.why didn they just make it a hijack,now that would have been suspenseful, but no they make this hash, i watched it all the way to the end, thinking it might improve, but no, earlier in the film, bruce willis phones his wife on a plane via a pay phone!!!, but when radio contact is lost with plane, it never occurs to anybody to phone them.!!! i hate long reviews on IMDb of more than one paragraph, but i cant stop i hated this film the fist time i saw it in 80's and i hate it even more now. i know its an action film, but really, there was no need for the crap plot, it was just lazy, one star is me being generaous

London Has Fallen (2016)

i rip roaring fight of a film

[10/10 · 19 March 2016]

i loved this film, i knew what it was going to be like all guns and baddies, i knew it was in London so expected big stunts and bombs going off, which is what we got and i knew it was an American film aimed at Americans, so i knew it involve them being great and everybody else being useless, and that's how it was.

It starts with the British prime minster dying, pity they didn't make it Tony Blair, but hey ho, then a massive funeral with loads of world leaders and terrorists who come to kill them all, which happens, and is very exciting, and from then on its full on action. with a simple plot save the president of America. simple and fun, i wasn't bored at all in this film.

if you love action and fantasy situations then you'll love it, if you like real life, then no, i give it 10 out of 10 , for sheer fun

Spectre (I) (2015)

dull , long, no direction ,mess

[1/10 · 28 February 2016]

i love james bond,I've seen all the films, and i can say this is the worst one, dull , meandering script, at times i had no idea what the plot was. lots of confusiion ,SPOILER ALERT: like aeroplanes appearing from no where,daniel craig didn't appear to act at all, just the same bemused face all the way through, im surprised he doesn't want to do any more.there are good stunts, car chases, fights, but lots of boredem, and often i was lost, the side story of oo dept being scrapped was just annoying, often extra would disappear completely, i wouldn't recommend this film to anybody. if james bond ahdnt been in it, id thinkit was a b movie made for TV

Sex Tape (2014)

a lewd take on married sex lives , and a sex tape

[10/10 · 18 February 2016]

Im glad i didn't heed the bad reviews on here, and still watched this film, its so funny, laugh out loud. I don't understand why people who don't like sex or comedy, go and watch a film called 'sex tape. Its fun from the first scene, and as the story unfurls, yes its lewd, and rude, sexy, and outlandishly funny,great cameos from Jack Black and Rob Lowe.who's character is hilarious. I found myself wondering what will happen next, as they surprised me over and over. But most of all if your married with kids, you'll know how your sex life is, but to see it played out on the screen makes it so funny. But if your embarrassed by sex or sexual language, then this film isn't for you, also its probably not for teenagers,as there is no actual sex in it. i love it and its going to be watched again, maybe many times over the years

Fury (2014)

good gritty war film

[10/10 · 13 February 2016]

if you want total reality in a war film, watch world at war, but if you want a romp, some action a bit of drama, this film is for you, I saw all the bad reviews on IMDb, after i had thoroughly enjoyed the film. I thought it was pretty authentic, very bad things happen in war, men are driven quite mad. I liked the whole thing how they had authentic uniforms, tanks, guns, It was suitably claustrophobic in the tank, realistic in that they were filthy, as there are no showers or pizza huts in the middle of war,and the second world war at the near end was vicious on all sides,prisoners were often summarily executed, some of the scenes in the war, really make me glad i wasn't there.i would recommend this film to anybody who likes old fashioned war films, where you just enjoy the ride.

Jericho (2016)

derivative drivel, a poor mans Catherine Cookson

[2/10 · 7 January 2016]

i was looking forward to 'jericho' as i'm interested in railways history and like dramas. well i should have known, the usual made up history ,parallel universe. ill number my complaints

1. not a single Irish man building the railway,

2, a black man in charge, in the 1880ish,

3 nobody even looks at the black man, a very rare thing in Britain in the 1880's .

4.unrealistic concerns for dead or injured workers

5. it felt just like a western cowboy film, just set in Yorkshire.

6pah

Gone Girl (2014)

a mystery/thriller

[6/10 · 1 January 2016]

i saw many bad reviews of this film, but i saw it on DVD, so wasn't expensive, i quite liked it, i bet it made a good book, it has plot holes, but what films don't, and the police may seem lazy in this, but isn't that normal, they aren't all CSI junkie. It has a lot of twists, which is what i like, and you're never sure whats going to happen, the end wasn't great, but maybe realistic. SPOILER ALERT: i think at the very end they should have shown the lowlifes on television, saying they had seen her in the motel.they were really the only loose ends, she hadn't fixed, as that bit could easily be wound up , but still worth seeing,if you catch it on television one afternoon

Lone Survivor (2013)

action packed afghan war yarn

[7/10 · 28 December 2015]

i watched this film alone,and enjoyed it, it starts a bit slow, with the usual watching soldiers mucking about on the camp, this i found boring, and i was glad i hadn't paid to watch it in the cinema, eventually the action starts, that's my only real qualm about the film. also i didn't understand what their mission was, but also didn't care, as the action is great, lots of shooting, getting shot, breaking bones, nasty injuries, the combat sequence was exciting, as always there are bits that don't see true, like surely the navy seals would speak some afghan? at least enough to greet people, or tell them to put their hands up etc..as shouting in English cant be very helpful. the stunts are amazing and look very painful, and id say almost no CGI was used,. if you like war films, action then you'll like this