Chris_Cy Reviews

The Human Centipede (First Sequence) (2009)

It's just a bad movie.

[3/10 · 16 May 2024]

This movie is worth 3/10 to me not because is disgusting or anything like that. It's a movie and everything can be done.

This is 3/10 because you have everything in there to be a poor movie.

Very bad acting. Most probably the asian guy swearing is the best acting in this movie. All the rest of the cast deliver nothing. Alongside with the very bad writing and the usual stupid decisions so they can take the story where they would like too. Typical for low budget and poor scenario. Instead for thinking something smarter to write, it's better to just write the stupidest decisions for the characters so the story can move on.

If you read the 2 line plot summary or watch the trailer, you have watched the movie.

As an idea for the disgusting horror/thriller/splatter movie, I have no problem watching it with better story and better acting.

M3GAN (2022)

Story by James Wan. Let's hope for an unrated version.

[7/10 · 11 February 2023]

Whatever James Wan touches turns to gold. Original story by Akela Cooper and James Wan. Screenplay by Akela Cooper.

As stated by the writer, the original story was much more gorier with a much higher body count.

This is something that drove me a bit off. The PG-13 rating. This movie could have been a much better Rated R movie. I would prefer a much more violent AI doll with more body count on the "agenda".

However, for a PG-13 movie, it doesn't let down.

An AI doll was created so a young girl can have a friend. Many more details are shown in the trailer.

As we know the doll turns bad somehow and from there there is much to explore and see.

This is considered a low budget movie but it is also proof that big budget does not make a great movie.

This is a box office success and it deserves that. I understand that they wanted to attract more audience with this rating so I am hoping for an unrated version and waiting for the sequel that is already announced.

Must Watch!

Bullet Train (2022)

Being honest, wasn't expecting that.

[7/10 · 11 February 2023]

This movie is flying around 7/10 - 8/10. It's a 7.5/10 more precisely.

It needed some bits and pieces to make it even better.

It's fast paced and 2 hours flew by just like that. I didn't know really what to expect but i wasn't expecting it to be that good. All the time you are on the edge with a new surprise, new mystery, new faces etc.

Full of action. A lot of action.

Deaths, crashes, injuries, shooting, blood, funny jokes you name it. This movie has everything needed to pass the time watching something without the need to think about a lot. Everything is right there in front of you.

The cast is a very good selection and everyone is amazing at the their role. Brad Pitt's role is funny and on the spot. There are many other respectable actors in this movie.

Samaritan (I) (2022)

Good Stallone movie. A solid 6/10-6.5/10

[6/10 · 11 February 2023]

This is an enjoyable Stallone movie. It could have been better in many ways but it is not bad and definitely not a waste of time.

There are a couple of plot holes, goofs and writing mistakes that could make this a solid 7/10. Do not expect to watch a DC or Marvel (cough cough) superhero movie. Compared to what they released recently those two and especially the latest from marvel (tv shows and movies) this is much better.

The acting of the kid could have been more smart and more natural. It felt that certain dialogues were forced and came out a bit unnatural. Also like in all superhero movies, some stupid decisions reduced my rating. Usually the stupid decisions happen to reach a certain outcome. With a bit of a better writing, this could have been avoided.

In general, I enjoyed this movie. The cast good and Stallone was Stallone despite his age.

A solid character with potential of a great better story next time if decide to go for a sequel.

Guillermo del Toro's Cabinet of Curiosities (2022)

First 5 episodes. So far so good.

[8/10 · 27 October 2022]

Like everyone else, I was expecting this forever. I do not get the reviewers that gave the show 1 star or said that is rubbish just after watching 1 episode.

I can understand up to a point that the first episode was not as good as expected for a first episode but it was not bad. Not perfect but not bad.

Until now I considered the 4th episode worst of all but it's a matter of taste. We will get into that very shortly.

E01 As mentioned, not the best choice of a 1st episode of a new series. Especially with all the hype it had until release day. However, I did watch it and enjoyed it. Nice story. Ended a bit fast and short but I can understand that this is not unlimited budget series.

E02 Definitely the worst for me. Worst in a good horror way. I have rat/mouse phobia. I cannot stand rats at all. Even a small mouse makes me crazy. When you watch you will imagine the horror felt with the "Graveyard Rats" as the title says.

Great story, great acting and great cinematography. CGI and practical effects were very good. The best episode after "The Autopsy"

E03 "The Autopsy" is the best episode for me until now. Very nice story reminding you of a recent movie. Will not spoil anything at all. Must watch.

E04 Might be a good different story but not for me. Cannot say I enjoyed it 100%. Was interesting up to a point. After a point, it lost me a bit. Ending was not great either. Could spend less time wasting time and more time elaborating more and making the story more interesting.

E05 That's a very interesting story combing some known stories, myth and lore. Still not my best episode but I really enjoyed it. Good casting, good acting, a known face from another netflix series and overall enjoyable. Some interesting and mysterious characters.

Might update with the rest of the episodes.

Overall the series is definitely worth watching. Especially if you have a netflix subscription, you are fan of Del Toro and fan of horror/gore you cannot miss this.

Jeepers Creepers: Reborn (2022)

If you are a fan of Jeepers Creepers please dont!

[1/10 · 16 October 2022]

You cannot unwatch what you watch and probably cannot be deleted from your mind if you are fan of the original films. I thought Jeepers Creepers 3 was the worst but they managed to do worse than that.

Make up, practical effects, special effects, CGI: 0.5/10 Poor writing, bad acting, effects that bring pain to your eyes, bad redesign of the Creeper. It's all there.

While watching I asked my self: "This is how some movies are when they are shot with an iPhone?" Finishing the movie I can safely say that it was shot on a Nokia 3310. Let's hope that this is the last we see of this franchise because nobody is taking it serious anymore.

I cannot believe someone will pay to watch this atrocity at the cinemas. Watch at your own risk.

The Cursed (2021)

Time spent well - Solid 7

[7/10 · 3 July 2022]

If there was a 7.5/10 might have been more appropriate rating.

Overall the movie is very well done. It's not your perfect horror movie that is made every 10-20 years but it's your well made, story-horror movie that comes out every 3-5 years or even more.

Good acting, good story, well executed, not the best CGI but still solid. Sometimes big budget movies from huge studios come out with this level of CGI or worse and you are thinking..."How is this possible?".

It doesn't have the typical cheap jump scares. It builds up on a story that is 90% original and different of what we have seen. This is the beauty of this movie. Good character development.

It starts a bit slow but this is not a problem at all. It helps building up your emotions. Especially if you are someone like me that before watching the movie, I didn't watch the trailer and didn't read any reviews or ratings.

Really enjoyed it overall and is missing very little to be an 8. I would like to keep this review spoiler free though.

Things Heard & Seen (2021)

Is this a horror movie? No! Thriller? So-So

[5/10 · 12 November 2021]

I started watching this movie and I wasn't really expecting to get scared or watch a good horror movie. To keep the review simple, I would prefer to cut down unnecessary stuff here and there and make a better ending. The ending was about 1 minute long, without a meaning and very rushed. There are very good moments in this film and for me the one and a half hour passed smooth. The last half an hour was like a filler and didn't even cover the ending properly.

The actors were great and Amanda is lovely as always. From me the 5/10 is because of Amanda. Could have been lower.

It was an enjoyable 6-7/10 until the end that killed the film.

Winners & Losers (2011–2016)

Mediocre TV show but popular in Bonies House

[5/10 · 31 May 2021]

Does not really have any good elements to become a proper tv series that you can binge watch. However it has good comedy elements and is watchable when you have time to kill. This is very popular and everybody like it in Bonies house after i leave.

WandaVision (2021)

Review up to episode 6

[9/10 · 13 February 2021]

For those to rush and burn the show from episode 1 or 2 just stop watching. A new series needs time to evolve and you need time to understand what the show runners want to show you. Many say the first 3 episodes are bad because it's a 50s sitcom etc. Without those episodes the show cannot go deeply to where it needs to go. It's Wanda's world and she can do whatever she wants with it. Or it's not her world 100%. We don't know and that's the beauty of it. Was I impressed with the first episodes? Totally YES! Because it's Marvel (I am a DC fan in comics) and they know how to do it. I believed the show had a lot more to tell and keep us interested. This is what's happening right now. Every next episode i better than the previous one. Every next ending it hooks you up more than the previous. If you are reading this, stop reading reviews until you watch the whole thing. Trust the show and stick with it. Marvel offered us something totally new in Marvel terms and maybe shows in general. However it is not missing any cinematic experience, special effects or storyline. If I didn't start watching the show and knew a little bit better, i would have waited for all the episodes to be released and watch them all like one movie. In my opinion, this show is one usual high quality Marvel movie, cut in pieces with some modifications to work as a tv show. 9/10 is a fair rating for this considering the genre, experimentation for new things and overall quality.

Abducted in Plain Sight (2017)

The Reviewers forget that this happened on the 70s

[7/10 · 16 January 2021]

I do not like rating documentaries. It's not a fantasy film to rate how good it was made but i have to review this one, rate it and answer to the other users.

The parents are so naive. That's agreed. Calling them stupid in your reviews between 2017 and on it's not right. The events happened in the 70s. Totally different era and way of thinking. Imagine a world without internet, facebook, smartphones etc. Closed communities, deeply involved in church, recent to the moon landing and all space things going on etc. I do not support them in anyway for their decisions, especially after the first kidnap. But we don't really know how they were thinking back then. In 2020 you say "How could she believe in aliens and the mission!" Live in the 70s as a 12 year old girl, be manipulated by a professional manipulator and you will know.

The 7/10 rating is because it felt at times that there was something more to that. Like leaving out crucial details. Maybe details to avoid more shame or so. The mother was presented so naive and stupid but then she is writing and attending events, talks etc. What happened is terrible and there is no rating for a true tragedy but the way it was presented it was like some things were left out for some reason.

6 Underground (2019)

Good and enjoyable Netflix movie

[7/10 · 15 December 2019]

For a Netflix movie, this sits between 7-8/10. Not you typical action movie that we have seen hundreds of times. Good action scenes and too much fun. Might be losing a point on the bad editing and the little confusing script on the character development. In general the movie is good, Ryan Reynolds is Ryan Reynolds and the rest of the main cast are absolutely great. Worth watching with a full bag of popcorn and loud sound. Now let's hope for a sequel next year or so.

X-Men: Dark Phoenix (2019)

Not bad at all. Very unfair rating

[8/10 · 5 September 2019]

That was the number 573 on the watched list. Sophie Turner did a very good job. One the first scenes felt like Sansa but after that she was great. Not a typical X-Men movie and it has its own prequel story. The CGI and all the special effects were top. Very realistic and well presented. The music scores were great. In general, the movie deserves an 8/10 in this genre. 5.9 that it is right now, it's very unfair. There have been worse comic book movies with better ratings. Watchable and enjoyable.

Venom (2018)

Critics have no idea what they are talking about!

[8/10 · 6 October 2018]

Usually I do not bother writing reviews as most movies already have a lot and is not going to make any difference. For this movie though and for Tom Hardy i felt that is an obligation to write a review because of the critic's bad reviews.

Yes, this movie could have been better. Maybe "Rated R" better. The critics are caught by the fact that the movie felt boring in the beginning. This movie is not a sequel. It is the first movie about Venom. It is very normal to have a story telling before any action happens. They must first cover the following:

• How Venom came to earth
• Who is Eddie?
• How Eddie and Venom became one
• How the transition was until Venom appears?

I think you need some time to cover those and the movie was not boring at all while covering those points. It was funny in a good way and Tom Hardy was really great.

The action started it went on until the end of the film. Eddie was great; Venom was great and all the supporting characters. Yes, the story could have been a little bit better in some details and the CGI at some scenes could have been a lot better. I would have rated this at 7.5/10 but deserves an 8/10 on imdb for the bad/biased critics out there. This is definitely a movie to watch at the cinema.

The Nun (2018)

Good Conjuring Universe story but not really scary

[6/10 · 7 September 2018]

In general the movie is a very good conjuring envolving story. The jump scares are not too scary because of the lack of suspence. They did not manage to build up suspence and a climate in general before the jump scare. When you wait for it and you know it's coming, you will not really feel scared at all. The best scary moment it was shown in the trailer. If this scene was kept in secret for the movie, it would have change my opinion a little bit. It was the best scary scene to show it in the trailer. I am rating it 7/10 overall as a movie and 9/10 as a conjuring universe story. We learned a lot of details about the characters in this prequel which it was a very addition to the whole universe. Worth watching? Yes. Especially if you are a fan of the Conjuring universe. Worth watching at the cinema? So So...

Tau (2018)

This is very good for a "Netflix Original"

[7/10 · 28 August 2018]

The movie was very watchable and fun. Not one of the 500+ movies i've watched i really enjoyed it. Netflix is top on series but when it comes to movies...no comment. For a netflix movie, I enjoyed it. Decent movie to spend some time and try something different. Gary Oldman is a nice addition voicing TAU. Give it a chance but do not press "PLAY" expecting a blockbuster.

Only Lovers Left Alive (2013)

My first review and my second waste of time after "Rubber"

[3/10 · 30 October 2016]

3/10 is only because of the good actors and their good acting. This movie maybe is just not for my taste. However, the whole 2 hours I was watching it, I was trying to figure out the whole story, point and plot of the movie. Nothing major. Talking, sleeping, walking etc. Just what the plot summary says. A depressed musician reunites with his love and at some point they are disrupted by her younger sister. I could just have read the plot summary only because there is not much more to see. Two hours is a very long time for the specific plot. This could be done in less than an hour but I suppose it wouldn't be a movie then. Half way through and 3/4 of the film, I was thinking when something new and interested and when a big twist is coming. I am still waiting.