In a baby-boomer galaxy long ago far far away...
Tom Cruise: I have done everything in my career. I am the best! However, I always regretted not being Luke Skywalker. I want to be Luke Skywalker!!!
Scientology yes men: Your highness, you are the best! You should have been Luke Skywalker! We have an idea! We can make it happen. We have just the script for you!
Tom Cruise: I'm listening.
Scientology Yes Men: We will make a new Epic Star Wars movie using the 'Top Gun' universe. You will be like Luke Skywalker who comes in and saves the day, and you will also kind of be the dysfunctional Darth Vader father figure at the same time. Boomers everywhere will love it! It will be better than Star Wars ever was!
Tom Cruise: I'm listening. This better be good.
Scientology yes men: Here is the script. We are way ahead of you.
Tom Cruise: *Reads Top: Gun Maverick*. Great Great great! I am still a sexy young stud. Check. I beat the Zoomer kids, because I am the BEST. Check. I get to be a Yoda trainer smart guy. Check. I beat the bad guys and save the day with my own "Death Star* scene, because I am the BEST. Check. I make peace with a son-figure just like Darth Vader. Check. I get the girl. Check. I do it MY way. Check. Let's do it!
... the rest is history! Boomers everywhere flocked to see this re-telling of their favorite Star Wars movie!
Tom Cruise: I have done everything in my career. I am the best! However, I always regretted not being Luke Skywalker. I want to be Luke Skywalker!!!
Scientology yes men: Your highness, you are the best! You should have been Luke Skywalker! We have an idea! We can make it happen. We have just the script for you!
Tom Cruise: I'm listening.
Scientology Yes Men: We will make a new Epic Star Wars movie using the 'Top Gun' universe. You will be like Luke Skywalker who comes in and saves the day, and you will also kind of be the dysfunctional Darth Vader father figure at the same time. Boomers everywhere will love it! It will be better than Star Wars ever was!
Tom Cruise: I'm listening. This better be good.
Scientology yes men: Here is the script. We are way ahead of you.
Tom Cruise: *Reads Top: Gun Maverick*. Great Great great! I am still a sexy young stud. Check. I beat the Zoomer kids, because I am the BEST. Check. I get to be a Yoda trainer smart guy. Check. I beat the bad guys and save the day with my own "Death Star* scene, because I am the BEST. Check. I make peace with a son-figure just like Darth Vader. Check. I get the girl. Check. I do it MY way. Check. Let's do it!
... the rest is history! Boomers everywhere flocked to see this re-telling of their favorite Star Wars movie!
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