cyrus_aman Reviews

Terminator Salvation (2009)

Terminator Stagnation (kudos to Ken for the title)

[4/10 · 24 May 2009]

I really wanted to like this film. I truly did. I'm a big fan of the others (even the oft criticized T3), and was really looking forward to this one. I gave it some time (about 20 minutes) before the "ughs" came out. First of all, the writing was horrid. I felt that I was watching the equivalent of a decently made fan-film. Terminator Salvation though doesn't have the excuse of a super-low budget YouTube production. To the contrary, it has fantastic special effects and a Hollywood casting.

The first Terminator was, aesthetically, an influential film. Like Blade Runner, Terminator has shaped the look of Sci-Fi films following it. What's tragic about Terminator Salvation, is that it (whether the writers were conscious of it or not) stole so much from other movies: The quiet little girl was Newt from Aliens. The old lady with the long gray hair, Common's character, the Terminator machine "fish", and the SkyNet computer providing a sloppy explanation of the "meaning-of-everything" to Sam Worthington's character reminded me of items out of Matrix Reloaded.

There were other quirks too:

• The little girl was a completely expendable character in the script. She became an annoyance. She had zero impact on this film. Not to give away to much, but she does push a button at one point in the film. However, another character could have completed the task.

• Sam Worthington is Australian. However, I honestly didn't realize this until about halfway into the film when his American accent slips and he sounds very, very Australian for part of a scene. This was distracting, to say the least.

• The ending was completely ridiculous. However, at this point of the film it didn't matter for me, it was already a bomb.

To be fair, the few things I DID like:

• The mega-sized Terminator with the detachable Terminator motorcycles.

• The digital overlay of Arnold near the end of the film. Very impressive technical work. It was as if they brought the young Arnold of 1984 to the movie set in a time-machine.

• Sam Worthington (minus the accent slip) as an actor. He did really well. As did the actor who played the Kyle Reese character.

• The scene where Connor hot-wires the Terminator motorcycle. Cool scene.

In short, my advice to would-be watchers of the movie is to wait for the DVD/Blu-Ray release or just re-watch T1, T2 or T3.

Halloween (2007)

If you're curious to see it, wait for the DVD... better yet, wait for it on cable.

[1/10 · 2 September 2007]

I truly went to the theatre with high expectations for this one. I am a fan of the Halloween franchise, and a fan of Rob Zombie's films. I REALLY wanted to enjoy this film, however it was bad all the way through. Zombie's reinterpretation left me with the same feeling of disgust I had watching Tim Burton's Planet of the Apes: I left the theatre wanting to see the original. Mind you, I wasn't disappointed because I expected a frame-by-frame remake, I just was expecting the usual one may want from a good-to-great movie: character development, believable dialogue, and good storytelling. Zombie's film lacked all three.

Creepshow 3 (2006 Video)

I was truly horrified . . . with how bad it was.

[1/10 · 22 May 2007]

Stay away from this DVD as if it were the black sludge in Creepshow 2. I'm an avid fan of the first film, and I have a soft-spot in my heart for the second one (I watched these movies repetitively as a teen). The first two movies even prompted me to read the EC horror comics they were modeled after: Haunt of Fear, Tales From the Crypt, and The Vault of Horror.

The charms of 1 & 2 were their great stories and comic-book-style format (pages turning between stories, comic panels transforming to live-action, etc.). Creepshow III has NONE of these elements. WARNING: This is a Creepshow release by TITLE ONLY. The film truly resembled the quality one would expect form a YouTube indie film produced by a high school student: Horrid acting, a total of TWO shooting locations (a cluster of houses and an apartment building), and stories that either made no sense or went nowhere.

It was a real shame, as I looked forward to the release of this film. You've been warned!

The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe (2005)

Had me sold until the battle scene...

[7/10 · 11 December 2005]

I truly enjoyed Narnia for the first two hours of the movie. The casting of the children was perfect. The special effects, though spotty at times, were effective. I was drawn into the world of the book through the artistic medium of film. However, the illusion of belief was shattered during the final battle scene. In short, I thought I was looking at cut scenes from a new Xbox 360 game.

This would be fantastic if the scene was produced for a video game, but not for a big-budget holiday film. The polar bears dragging the ice queen's sleigh didn't look a far-cry (no pun intended) from the cgi Coca-Cola bears. Some scenes with the centaurs looked like a first-generation Xbox or PS2 title. Very young children will--most likely--not be distracted by these details. But everyone else, from teens to adults, will see it as a cheapening of the film.

Will I see it again? Most likely. Will I buy it on DVD? Probably not. I'm hoping that, if future films are produced in the series, the effects will be improved. The expectation of the average movie-goer has been raised dramatically (ala Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter, etc.). If future Narnia movies do not meet (or raise) the bar previous films have set, they will not stand the test of time, nor the patience of the audience.

The Grudge (2004)

Ignore any poor reviews. GREAT FILM & SCARY AS HELL.

[23 October 2004]

I saw this in a sold out theatre tonight, and the entire audience was in FRIGHTENED hysterics. I love a good scare, and it's hard to find in a horror movie. The pacing of the scare tactics in The Grude are a.) ORIGINAL and b.) RELENTLESS.

I nearly didn't see it due to a poor Ebert review and a very low-rating on rottentomatoes.com (43%). However, I was far beyond "pleasantly surprised."

I am impressed with how much fun I had being scared with the audience.

This movie will be successful due to good word-of-mouth (ala The Ring). For those who are self-proclaimed "purists," and feel only the original Japanese version can be the best, keep in mind that the director also directed the original.

Watch this movie in the theatre ASAP, or put it in your netflix.com rental cue!

Signs (2002)

Outstanding film about loss of faith and redemption...

[10/10 · 4 August 2002]

M Night Shyamalan has become one of my favorite movie makers (since he writes, directs AND produces them), since seeing "Signs". The film departs from the "surprise ending" technique seen in Sixth Sense and Unbreakable, and focuses on Mel Gibson's character's loss of faith in God.

The greatness of the promotion of this film has resided in not giving away virtually any of the plot details in the trailers and TV spots. I came to the film with the following preconceptions: 1.) it's a film about crop circles, and 2.) who/what is creating the crop circles. The crop circle phenomenon simply lays the foundation for a greater story of inner human conflict.

This is all I wish to say of the film. Having it unravel before me without having read the spoilers made it an incredible experience.

Watch this film! :)