The Big Bang Theory (TV Series)
The Boyfriend Complexity (2010)
Simon Helberg: Howard Wolowitz
Photos
Quotes
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Howard Wolowitz : Aah, this takes me back, Leonard obsessing about Penny. I mean, don't get me wrong, I love your new stuff, but once in awhile, it's nice to hear the hits.
Raj Koothrappali : Ooh, ooh, do "Our babies will be smart and beautiful". That one always makes me laugh.
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[Howard has invited Bernadette to join Raj, who is monitoring a telescope]
Bernadette Rostenkowski : So, where's the telescope?
Howard Wolowitz : It's in Hawaii, but Raj controls it from here. He's hoping to see Epsilon Eridani dim, which would be evidence of a planet orbiting it.
Bernadette Rostenkowski : So we just sit and stare at the screen, waiting for something to happen?
Howard Wolowitz : I did it with you, when we rented 'The Notebook'.
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[first lines]
Raj Koothrappali : You know who's got to be the bravest person in the Marvel universe? Whoever has to give She-Hulk her bikini wax.
Howard Wolowitz : Want to talk brave? How about Captain America's undocumented Mexican gardener?
Leonard Hofstadter : He's not braver than whoever uses the bathroom after the Thing.
Sheldon Cooper : As usual you're all wrong; the bravest person in the Marvel universe is the doctor who gives Wolverine his prostate exam.
Howard Wolowitz : How about the guy who gets a prostate exam from Wolverine?
Sheldon Cooper : Now you're just being silly. Wolverine never displayed the slightest interest in helping others prevent prostate cancer.
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[Raj and Howard are playing Intergalactic Battleship]
Howard Wolowitz : C-7.
Raj Koothrappali : Miss.
Howard Wolowitz : How could that be a miss? C-6 was a hit. C-8 was a hit. Part of your starship has to be on C-7.
Raj Koothrappali : Not if it has a hole in the middle.
Howard Wolowitz : What kind of space ship has a hole in the middle?
Raj Koothrappali : A... Romulan battle bagel?
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[last lines]
Leonard Hofstadter : D'you get to play with Raj's big telescope last night?
Howard Wolowitz : Wh... Where did that come from?
Raj Koothrappali : He never touched my telescope!
Howard Wolowitz : Way to go shutting up.
Raj Koothrappali : I did shut up. Now you shut up.
Howard Wolowitz : Fine.
Raj Koothrappali : Thank you.
[pause]
Raj Koothrappali : How come you didn't call me this morning?
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Raj Koothrappali : I can't be drinking! I'm about to make an important scientific discovery here!
Howard Wolowitz : What - ? Galileo did his best work while drinking wine.
Raj Koothrappali : How do you know that?
Howard Wolowitz : Well, he was Italian. It's a reasonable assumption.
Raj Koothrappali : Dude, can you even open your mouth without spewing a cultural stereotype?
Howard Wolowitz : Oh, I'm sorry, Galileo drank diet Sprite!
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Howard Wolowitz : Actually, Indian Monopoly is just like regular, except the money's in rupees, instead of hotels, you build call centers, and when you take a Chance card, you might die of dysentery.