3/10
Ham-fisted and pointless
30 May 2017
If your Alien movie features the classic alien for all of fifteen or so minutes, you have a problem. But when the preceding movie seems entirely devoted to mashing Prometheus into the Alien universe, it's a disaster.

The problem is not that they try to mash the two together. It's just that it's done in such an unbelievably sloppy way, full of pointless exposition. I could hardly figure out who the characters were, yet somehow it was deemed important that I know who hooked up with who. Ridley Scott's recent tendency for over-stuffed character development is in full force here.

This movie shouldn't be called Alien. It should be called David, as it is mostly about the creepy robots that the early films in particular used to great effect. None of it really adds up, not in the tradition of any of the previous movies, nor as a standalone experience.

Would it have been so hard to just create a new Alien horror? Even the new game is scarier and better than this. And at least Prometheus, for all its stupidity, made a little sense.

Alien Convenant is just a bunch of nonsense. Wait to watch it at home instead.
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