Dead in Tombstone (2013 Video)
4/10
All this and epilepsy too.
29 November 2013
Danny Trejo is an acquired taste. Since being given cult status by the likes of Quentin Tarantino and Robert Rodriguez, fearless Danny has now earned headliner status in movies built around him. Good for Danny, he's paid his dues. That being said, even the iconic presence of Mr. Trejo can't save this direct-to-DVD supernatural western. Trejo has maybe five states of being and facial expression in his acting repertoire. but only two are utilized by the director of this spooky oater. Danny looks grim. Danny looks grimmer. That's all folks. Still he tries, but he's just not cut out for leading man status.

A paper thin plot drags its story out for around 100 minutes here, filling the spaces between the actual story with repetitive gunfights, slow motion death, general mayhem, and an occasional visit to Hell, where the real-life horror show called Mickey Rourke pretends to be Satan (the character is referred to as "The Blacksmith" in the credits). Danny has been betrayed by his homies, the Blackwater Gang. His half brother Red (played by a nearly unrecognizable Anthony Michael Hall) murders him and Danny ends up in Hell. Tortured by Mickey Rourke (in a sleepwalking tour-de-force of acting as Satan), Danny strikes a bargain to win his soul back. Mickey wakes up long enough to accept this bargain using the worst dubbed-in voice for Rourke imaginable. Danny returns to life, and sets out to kill his homies in revenge. End of plot.

This could have been really interesting in the hands of a better director. Unfortunately, no one told the actual director Roel Reiné that he wasn't making a music video. This entire movie is shot in 2-6 second scenes, underlit and too dark to penetrate, too many flashy jumpcuts, etc. If you don't come out of a viewing of this without acquiring epilepsy, lucky you. The end resolution is poorly thought out. Still, the Romanian locations and costumes are worth a look here and earn the first two stars I give. Danny T. gets the other two for really giving his all...I think. Maybe Mickey Monster Rourke slipped Danny one or two of the sleeping pills he must have been gulping down during filming. An interesting/headache inducing flick for those with short attention spans.
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