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Reviews
Star Trek (2009)
Just Watch It
This was the easiest 9 out of 10 I've ever given. Star Trek is the Star Trek movie we've been waiting for, despite it's negation of almost all previous Trek (not a spoiler, by the way). Part of the reason I don't give it a 10 is because of that weird negation which leaves us with Enterprise as the only Trek relevant to this new series (I hope we get some sequels out of this!). The new timeline leaves us with the same characters who are somehow different. Everything is familiar but different enough that we don't know what to expect. So this movie feels very much like a reboot as well as a continuation, and a sequel as well as a prequel in a way only Star Trek can. You will feel uneasy about this a few times in the movie, when you realize that there is no reset button, and no way to cheat death. The Kobiashi Maru figures into the story, and you'll see why when you watch. By the way, without spoiling too much, Spock, Vulcan or not, copes with loss remarkably well.
Venturing into the unknown, coping with loss, and a fair amount of logic vs. humanity make this a more mature movie than perhaps the producers want you to think it is (the commercials seem to advertise it as purely an action flick). But watching it reminded me of the best parts of Star Trek II and VI, my favorite Trek films. In fact, as much action as there is here, it never seems to drag too long or seem incomprehensible as it does in most action movies. The focus is on the story and the characters.
And the characterizations are solid, if a bit different from what we expect. Sulu doesn't have his cocky optimism and machismo despite being respectably kick-ass. Cho seems to be channeling his masochist character from House rather than the reborn Harold from the end of Harold and Kumar. Uhura, still the most compassionate character, is withdrawn and a bit cold compared to Nichelle's warm and playful Uhura who sings and shakes her booty when off duty. Bones is spot-on, and Zachary Quinto, who already seems to have the name of a Vulcan, is also superb. Chris Pine has clearly done his homework here and channels Kirk far better than Jim Carrey ever did on In Living Color. There is one scene towards the very end of the movie, as he walks onto the bridge where Pine seems to have copied cell-for-cell a signature Shatner mannerism. I'll have to watch it again to be more specific.
One last note. Not terribly pertinent but something I have to get out. The Vulcan school where we see young Spock seemed just a bit too robotic and alien for a Vulcan institution. This is a culture of logic, yes, but also a culture of jeweled breastplates and Hebrew hand signals. Eh.
Dancer in the Dark (2000)
A Musical that Can't be Saved by Music
American high school students laugh at the films of Hitler's speeches. They are told how his charisma allowed him to enchant the German people and lead them to war with the world, but they don't understand it because he doesn't appear charismatic to them. Indeed, if/when fascism comes to America, the charismatic leader will not act like Hitler, he will act American and conform to American ideas of what America should be. As someone who has known more than a few Germans, and has traveled and studied in Germany, I still do not understand the appeal of the mono-testicled Austrian. And although there are things I know about German history, politics, culture, etc. I still will not claim to fundamentally understand the German people. Lars von Trier has never been to America, but still condescends to possess the damning insights which may not heal us, but are surely intended to make us feel ashamed for simply being American, not for any cultural, historical, or political insight. Dancer in the Dark, a New Zealand film made by a Dane and starring an Icelander bares less resemblance to America than 300 does to ancient Greece.
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze (1991)
Teasing us with its own potential
This is a movie I enjoyed immensely as a kid. When I was 8 years old, the Ninja Turtles were just about coolest thing you could imagine. This was a time when the crime rate was continuing a decade-long rise and authority figures were adopting rap music to get their messages across in a poorly-executed attempt to trick kids into thinking their were cool. Filthy urban landscapes were part of the national conscience and the Ninja Turtles were a prime example of that. There were reptiles (and a rat) who had been mutated by spilled toxic waste and live in the sewers. These are not the superheroes of the Golden Age.
This dank and gritty-as-hell atmosphere made the first Turtles movie seem unique and, in retrospect, ahead of its time. It was based on a comic book and a children's cartoon but made an effort to be serious and and as realistic as possible (save for the reptilian aspects of the heroes.) The heroes' van is a rickety piece of crap with no specialized gadgetry, Shredder has almost no infrastructure to speak of, and The Foot are mere humans, recruited urban teenagers looking to make themselves feel like men.
The second movie, released less than two years later, shows some serious degradation. The turtles are even less coherent than before (they seemed to have exhibited significantly more character development and distinction in the cartoon series). Early in the movie, Splinter warns that the outside world will never accept the turtles, and so they must never become a part of it. This promises some serious future introspection, as the mutated characters will perhaps search for some meaning in their own origins. One of the turtles expresses disappointment in discovering that his origins were a mistake, depressed that his life has no purpose, perhaps an allegory for the human desire for existential meaning in a godless universe. But it is never really addressed again. At the end of the movie a newspaper reads something about "Ninja Rap Invented". See, the turtles found themselves fighting the bad guys in a night club where Vanilla Ice happens to be performing, and one improvisation leads to another. . . The nearest I can figure is the turtles discovered their purpose in life is to dance to Vanilla Ice. They certainly seem happy enough in the next movie.
I could go on about how the dialog often makes no sense, how the token female is underused, basically a maid here, and how the seemingly compelling villains are wasted (Shredder believably comes back for this but is given almost no character development and an over-sized helmet) and the confused action sequences (a speaker that works like a canon) but ultimately this is a kids' movie, and with no firearms (they would have rendered several plot points meaningless) it is good at being that.
The Final Frontier Revisited (2004)
But Not Quite Bad Enough to be Good
I think any reasonably social Star Trek fan (something more common now with the internet) knows a few other fans who don't quite get it. Sure, they've seen every episode at least twice, own every version of every movie as well as a few too many "technical manuals", but they would be hard-pressed to write a story of their own; not just for lack of writing talent, but for lack of any understanding of what Star Trek is about. This movie doesn't "get it" at all, and is worse than the worst of Enterprise. It at once abandons any semblance of a "Star Trek" story or message as well as any message or concept of its own. If the 300 pound man with Vulcan ears isn't enough to tell you the creators are on the wrong track, the ending will slap you in the face worse than any cinematic prank ever pulled by David Lynch. Not that this movie is as creative as David Lynch, but it will give you a similar sense of betrayal and wasted time.
Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles (2008)
I am going to recommend it anyway
This show exhibits many of the weaknesses of contemporary drama and action series, and rides heavily on the conceptual strength and popularity of the Terminator films. I laugh out loud during almost every episode, either due to unintentionally comedic writing or acting, and every episode I have watched alone. Summer Glau is cute but not threatening at all. Thomas Dekker exhibits all the signs of being a producer's boy toy. But I am going to recommend this series anyway.
I am not particularly a fan of science fiction series, I hardly watch any TV shows at all, and I hate almost every action film; however I was drawn into this series from the very start. By ignoring the third film, this series leaves us guessing what will happen next as more and more irreversible events unfold. The second season has shown some rather gratifying character developments in James Ellison and John Connor, even though it seems to be temporarily ignoring Cameron's past developments. For once I am actually interested in watching Dekker's Connor develop, I want him to have some sample of a normal life. Note to the producers though: don't skimp on Cameron. Intelligently written robots are television gold (Data and the Doctor from Star Trek for example). Also, it's great to see a fat pregnant woman on TV showing off her stomach. I wonder what pivotal character she's going to give birth to later in the season.
The Tempest (1979)
Sadly Unenjoyable and Barely Worth Watching at Best
Derek Jarman has shown us time and time again that dialog is not his strong suit. He is a painter, and paint he does. His films are almost always visually splendid, but about as exciting to watch as paint that is already dry. Watch his movies in fast forward, the really fast setting that you can only get on DVD. In The Tempest, Jarman does very little with the script or the characters, using them as simply a lattice to hang a very long and well-constructed cinematographic frame. He even goes so far as to contradict Shakespeare's original script to achieve these excrucriatingly slow and lifeless scenes. There is none of the romance, magic, trickery, or urgency the script calls for, little spontaneity, and the character of Caliban in particular is reduced to a quivering and insane idiot of sorts, similar to Gaveston in Jarman's Edward II. It is too bad that this is just about the only film version of The Tempest available.
The Nutcracker (1993)
Disappointing
I have seen many, many productions of The Nutcracker. Now perhaps I viewed this movie from the tainted point of view of a theatrical director, but I was disappointed. I'm sure people in the specific business of ballet choreography find this production impressive but from a purely theatrical perspective I found everything from design to choreography to be lackluster and unbefitting of a "motion picture". None of the traditionally "weird" and impressive costumes looked like what they were supposed to be (i.e. the candies didn't look like candies, the rats didn't look like rats but rather like chocolate kisses,) the acting was weak, perhaps toned down too much for the screen, and the choreography just didn't do anything for me. This makes the entire show very satisfactory (at best), as if it were intended to not set itself apart from any other production. But remember, again, this is from the artistic perspective of a theatrical director, not a dancer or a choreographer, but a straight male theatrical director.