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dean29
Reviews
Wendigo (2001)
Watch your grass grow instead
Roger Ebert should be banned from moving reviewing for giving this 2 1/2 stars. He said the only reason he didn't recommend it was because of the ending.
The movie is not creepy, spooky, scary, nor original. It is slow, boring, and the acting is subpar. The creature looks like a stuffed dear on wires once you finally get to it.
Sit outside in your front lawn and watch your grass grow for 1 1/2 hours. It will be a much more rewarding experience.
Webs (2003)
Like a two hour episode of Sliders
A group of characters are transported to a parallel dimension in which spiders rule the earth. They try to build a portal to get back to their world. Sound familiar yet? Honestly, this has the look and feel of Sliders and about the same budget. The only difference is the characters in Sliders were more interesting. I am not saying that this is horrible but it isn't good either. If you like Sliders then watch this clone on SciFi channel when nothing else is on.
Final Destination 2 (2003)
Extremely Violent but not scary
I barely remember the original Final Destination. The plot sounded creative that death was chasing people who had somehow managed to cheat it.
**WARNING MINOR SPOILERS** I will remember FDII more just because of the violence. This is one of the most extremely violent movies I have ever seen. The director obviously wants to go for the over the top semi-funny death scenes. We get to see people decapitated, sliced, stabbed, and blown up. The difference between this film and many of the same genre is the cameras never turn away. You see the violence and they are very good special effects. If you pay attention, you will know how the character is going to die. I think this was intentional by the director in order to try and build tension.
The movie deserves credit for it's creativity but there but besides a spectacular freeway wreck scene, there is nothing that stands out about this film other than excess gore. It is not scary, does not build tension, nor is it thought provoking. The creativity in the death scenes makes it just above average. This is probably a must see for horror fans but this will not bring new viewers to the horror genre.
Rating 6 out of 10.
Suspiria (1977)
This movie is not scary
Warning: If you have heard good reviews about this movie and never seen it then just stay away from it. I like well made movies and I like horror movies. This is neither. This movie would not have been scary in 1978. This movie is only scary for being so bad. If you want to see a movie from this time period then rent the original Exorcist and stay away from this.
The Bourne Identity (2002)
Nothing original at all
I heard some buzz that this was an above average flick. I will ignore the buzz from now on. This movie was interesting for about 30 minutes and then it just became boring. You have seen every scene in this movie. It is really by the number moving making with Europe as the backdrop instead of the U.S. The only problem is that this movie doesn't have anything interesting. Matt Damon plays Bourne as you might expect. Potente's character of Marie is ok but doesn't stand out. The government agents are the same as every movie of this type. The ending is weak and anti-climatic.
This movie gets 4 out of 10.
The Scorpion King (2002)
Exactly what you would expect and less
There is not too much I can say about this movie. If you have seen any of the Conan movies then you have seen a better movie. There is really not much action, great special effects, or interesting characters in this movie at all.
I will say that it is probably better than the Mummy Returns but a root canal is probably better than the Mummy Returns. There is just nothing that stands out. The fight scenes are very typical. There are no eye popping special effects which could be good but not in this movie.
My best advice is to wait until this comes out to video and makes it to the dollar rental rack and it is a rainy day. It might help you pass 90 minutes but don't expect much.
There is one kind of neat scene that involves giant fire ants so I am going to bump my ranking by a point in a half.
This one gets a 3 out of 10.
Changing Lanes (2002)
Decent but ending ruins movie
*SPOILERS* This movie had me fascinated through the first hour. It takes a look at human nature and the apathy that people have towards each other. The main characters are basically good people with bad flaws. They are victims of circumstances and their own bad judgements.
This movie was a good idea. However, throwing in unneeded racial overtones and then a silly "happy" ending seemed to unrealistic based on the characters previous actions. The movie still has some redeeming value if you can overlook the flaws.
This morality tale gets 7 out of 10.
Panic Room (2002)
Good character study
WARNING *SPOILERS*
Panic Room is better than one might expect. I had a hard time motivating myself to see a movie about a extremely wealthy woman who can afford a 3 story house in Manhattan which comes with the "panic room." However to my surprise, this movie was more about the three thieves who were to steal.
Jody Foster played the divorced character well but the real fun of this movie was the interactions among the three thieves who must get her and her son out of the panic room so they can get the money hidden in the room.
Two of the thieves turn out to be not that bad of guys (for thieves at least) while the third turns out to be a cruel sadistic killer. The three of them work on trying to get into the Panic Room while not trusting each other and not sure about the motives of the other two.
This turns out to be quite interesting and suspenseful at parts. The movie has good dialogue and comes off as being believable.
Panic Room does not try to be anything other than entertaining and suspenseful. It does not attempt to be a great movie but meets the goal it has set for itself.
Panic room earns a strong 8 out of 10
Frailty (2001)
Flick lacks scares
This movie has some interesting dialogue, some very good acting, and a controversial subject matter. It should be a good film. Sadly it is not. What does this movie lack? This movie lacks any chills, scares, or creepiness. This movie just kind of moves forward. You would think their would be some kind of suspense or scariness but there is none. The ending should not surprise anyone as you can see it coming. In fact, there are no plot turns that you don't see coming. The making of the movie was a good idea. The execution went awry. I know there was a scary movie in there somewhere.
Resident Evil (2002)
Terrible Movie
Words cannot describe how bad this movie is. The acting is subpar, the plot is by the numbers, and the movie moves slow. Do yourself a favor and rent "Dawn on the Dead" and skip this one. There is nothing new to the Zombies here. The zombies will do nothing more than make you yawn. On a scale of 1 to 10, this movie gets a 3.
Hellraiser: Inferno (2000)
Closer to Jacob's Ladder than other Hellraiser movies
This movie was a big surprise. I expected this direct to video release to be something awful especially after the dreadful Bloodline. To my surprise, this was a pretty good movie.
What does this have in common with the other Hellraiser movies? Nothing other than the puzzle box and a very short cameo by Pinhead. Is this a bad thing? NO! The problem is that Hellraiser has depended too much on Pinhead as the star of the series. This outing actually has Pinhead only as an antagonist who appears very briefly.
I don't want to give away too much for those of you trying to decide whether it is worth the rental fee. It is a morality tale and follows the investigation of a Denver police detective. The detective starts having trouble determining reality from dreams. He is being followed by demons very much in the same manner that Tim Robbin's character was being chased by demons in the classic Jacob's Ladder. The protagonist has made "his own private hell" and must be made to realize his own sins through the help of the demons.
This is no way as good as Jacob's Ladder but this is less of a slasher flick than previous Hellraiser movies and more of psychological thriller using a lot of surrealistic techniques to keep the viewer questioning reality.
My Rating 7 out of 10. Probably one of the best made for video horror films on the market although I imagine it will have limited appeal to hardcore Hellraiser fans.