rfgraham Reviews

Cirque du Freak: The Vampire's Assistant (2009)

They have a nerve calling themselves Vampires

[1/10 · 2 November 2009]

1 Vampires have FANGS! 2 Vampires Don't AGE! 3 Vampires HEAL!

What is a vampire without fangs? Every Vampire from Nosferatu to Barnabas to Angel to Count Chocula has had fangs. Even Count Von Count on Sesame Street has fangs!!! It is their trademark, even if they aren't going to bite someone in the neck, they need to have FANGS!

If John C Reilly was 20 years old when he was turned, then immortality has not done him any favors. He's the oldest looking 20 year old I've ever seen! He's only 200, I'd hate to see him when he's 500!!!

If Vampires have "Super spit" as they call it in the movie, then How can Murlaugh give Crepsley more scars. Shouldn't they heal?

The only weapons this vampire has is, super speed (Flitting???) and a very poisonous spider.

What is with Salma Hayek, has her career sunk so low that she is reduced to putting whiskers on her otherwise beautiful face?

Wilem Defoe, He is so far above this movie, He must have lost a bet with the director and ended up appearing in this monstrosity of a film.

This was boring and pointless. If it is to be a kid's movie, I can't imagine what age group it is aiming for. If it is for adults, then it should SUCK but it doesn't. It's just plain awful!

If you like Vampires then, PLEASE DO NOT WASTE YOUR TIME.

Taken (I) (2008)

I am still shaking!

[10/10 · 1 January 2009]

This film is 94 minutes. 85 minutes runs at 150MPH and does not stop! The best action in a long time. Most movies slow down in the middle and give you some sloppy mood music while the characters reflect or whatever. This film Moves and keeps moving. You will find yourself making fists, blood racing, ducking each punch, and screaming. In the end, your heart will be pounding and you will wish this adrenaline rush didn't have to stop.

You start off feeling sorry for this retired x-spy/hit man/G-I. You think Liam Neeson looks like anything but a tough guy. He will surprise you. My only problem with this film…. I can't believe his daughter would ever leave his side again. After watching this film, I would stay with Liam Neeson forever! Truly the best action film I have seen in a long time!!!

The Prince of Hearts (1997 TV Movie)

Lighthearted, excellent performance by Green- but writing is flawed

[9/10 · 28 January 2006]

What can I say about Robson Green? Talented /Handsome /Charismatic /Dreamy? He is the best in what ever he does. Very talented performances by him and Rupert Penry-Jones The few flaws in this lighthearted film are not theirs. Tara Fitzgerald who was cast to play an American. First, her accent is as far from American. I would like to know, when the writers ever heard and American say, "brilliant" ? It may be common English slang but absolutely unheard of in American speech. Fitzgerald is cast as a girl from a "common" American home life. Very unbelievable in a nasal sounding accent. Listening to her was painful, made only bearable by the thrill of watching a master like Robson Green in yet another talented performance.