the_teapot Reviews

Aftermath (2016)

Untalented writing

[1/10 · 4 October 2016]

I am writing this after seeing the first episode of "Aftermath" because it is rare that I am this disappointed by a show's pilot.

I felt something was a little off from the start. This introductory "in medias res" episode was, I assume, imagined as an adrenaline rush that glues you to the screen. So unfortunately all the events that could have been delivered as curiosity-spiking mysteries over a slightly longer course of screen time, are nervously packed into quick sequences of prematurely revealing action. Ironically, a show called "Aftermath" seems least of all concerned with the "aftermath" of shocking events that its characters are experiencing. It seems too anxious to move on to the next "surprise", and this results in some rather bizarre and unlikely character behaviour.

I have no quarrel with the choice of supernatural events of the story. It's a sci-fi show, suspension of disbelief is required. But no amount of suspension of disbelief can fix poorly conceived lead characters. With so little substance to their personalities they are like hollow figures being tossed through a storm of special effects, all along unsure whether to look upset or heroic.

In my frankest opinion, the writers should go back to school and take a few dramaturgy classes because their storytelling skills leave much to be desired.

Rammbock: Berlin Undead (2010)

Realism in zombie films? Yes please.

[10/10 · 20 April 2014]

What I always appreciate in any film, but especially one in the zombie genre (because it is so rare), are believable characters. Characters whose actions are logical, even in bizarre situations. And I always appreciate a writer's ability to develop a dramatic plot without relying on characters' moronic decisions to stir trouble. This is seen too rarely in this genre.

For anyone wondering whether this is their kind of zombie film, I'll try to knock up a short summary with no spoilers. :) The plot of Rammbock takes you to the very start of the zombie virus outbreak, it begins while the world is still "normal". When it happens, it happens very suddenly. What follows is of course shock and confusion and the horror of not knowing what is going on, then the subsequent eeriness of witnessing the society dissipate through loss of public communication channels, following which the characters must come to terms with the weight of the situation, and shift their usual priorities and inhibitions to bare survival.

You are taken through this process with the protagonists, witnessing the first few days of the outbreak and the fragile survival of people trapped in a residential building in the middle of Berlin, surrounded by hordes of the violent infected.

Although the director decided not to reveal much about anyone's background and past, this doesn't stop you from empathising and gradually growing fond of them. At no point are any (uninfected) characters polarised or dehumanised, even the nameless ones.

This is the type of zombie film with no over-the-top violence and very little gore, the accent is on eeriness and tension, rather than action and special effects.

I would say that as far as the zombie apocalypse topic goes, this is one of the more realistic portrayals of how it would look for someone in Europe.

If you liked 28 Days Later or Rec, you will almost certainly like this one. If you're more of a Resident Evil type of person, maybe skip it.

Vegetarian Cannibal (2012)

Big disappointment

[1/10 · 31 December 2012]

A while ago someone launched a rumour in here the Croatian press that this film was going to be nominated for an Oscar for the best foreign picture. HA HA HA HA HA. Good one! Marketing genius, whoever made that one up.

Well, not only is it not being considered for an Oscar or any kind of prestigious award like that, it should actually be given a Razzie for one of the worst films ever. Luckily for Branko Schmidt, the piece is too obscure to actually get a Razzie. So that's one upside of living in Croatia, eh?

That and maybe the fact that Croatian cinematography isn't renowned for spewing out masterpieces in general, so maybe within the scope of that environment this film even compares as "okay". On a more global scale I don't think it deserves any attention.

In short I would describe it as a very sketchy, shallow piece whose story line lacks development and is poorly narrated through sporadic and thin dialogue between superficial, grotesque characters whose motivation is at best - unclear.

Many mediocre films suffer from lack of idea how to end a story, even if their beginning was promising. Cannibal Vegetarian lands "in medias res" with a chaotic speed-sequence that is supposed to reflect the frantic personality of the main character. Perhaps this style may appeal to younger generations. This form of narration continues throughout the film. Unfortunately the director seemed to be so preoccupied with painting the pathology of the main character's psyche that he forgot to develop any other character, or even give a flow and some direction to the actual story being told. Just when you think the plot is about to culminate, it ends abruptly as if the writer had just given up. You get dragged through 85 minutes of painful, forced interactions between all-bad-guys characters to be given no resolution and no message?

What an unfortunate collision of bad writing and unimaginative directing.

Dark Horse (2011)

This is one of the worst films I have ever seen.

[1/10 · 6 December 2012]

In short - it's a poor story, badly told, with poor dialogue and superficial characters. It has no real message and it doesn't go anywhere. Does that sound harsh? :)

Well, it has no plot, you know - introduction/rising action/culmination/resolution, the basic elements of storytelling? It kinda stops at rising action and then gets lost.

So the whole film is really just a bizarre flow of superficial exchange between inexplicably strange characters. When it begins to look like a story might be unfolding, it implodes on itself in some kind of failed attempt intrigue the viewer with a sudden switch to a dream-inside-a-dream narrative. The ambiguity of such an ending creates no intrigue. It merely underwhelms.

And I have to say I feel sorry for the actors. Christopher Walken and Mia Farrow? What a waste of talent. You know the film industry is in a state when actors of such volume take on such rubbish parts. Sure, Walken has done his share of Z-production films, but this is the first one I have ever seen that made me wonder why, apart from the obvious attraction of his name, did they think he of all people should play this measly part? Not that he did a bad job at it... just... why??? What kind of casting is that!?

All-American Murder (1991 Video)

Ouch, this is BAD.

[1/10 · 24 November 2007]

This is one of the most unconvincing, most terribly directed movies I've watched in a long time. It's so unprofessionally done, it's almost like a student movie. The story has some potential, I admit it's not the most predictable plot line, and some actors are quite good in their roles (Walken & Schlatter have some good chemistry), but scenes which are supposed to be scary are so badly done they come across as hilarious. Some scenes are so out of place and so unconvincing you find yourself thinking it's going to be a dream scene and the character will wake up, but no, it's for real. Then you just can't believe it. Background music is terrible. Character motivation is dubious. Many people's actions simply don't make any sense. It's basically C-production.

Bang Bang You're Dead (2002)

Good social message

[9/10 · 18 April 2007]

I like this film because it shows the "other side", and tries to go to the root of the problem of school violence, not just deal with its consequences. It's easy to see kids who commit violence in schools as monsters, but it doesn't help the matters much. This film gives a different perspective on those very individuals. The reasons why young people slip so badly into antisocial behavior go so much deeper than "oh he's just a bad apple" and this movie has made a good job at showing that. Not that those who have committed mass murders should be forgiven just because they were such martyrs, but perhaps preventively, the American educational system should think of a different approach towards misbehaving teenagers, and look more into removing the causes of their frustration, rather than just try to whip them into good behavior with punishment. Classical disciplinary measures like detention, suspension and expelling tend to only worsen their isolation, which only reinforces their hatred of life,(and not just their own!). I believe many tragedies could have been prevented if the society had done less frowning upon children who have a hard time fitting in, and I like the fact this film hints that if you give a young person so full of anger and frustration a bit of respect instead of contempt, it may significantly change the way they see life.