jdengraver Reviews

Beetlejuice Beetlejuice (2024)

Not sure what the negativity is about

[8/10 · 15 September 2024]

I've said this before, I'll say it again. You just can't please people. You make a sequel that tries to be different, people complain. You make a sequel that tries to follow the original source material, people will still complain.

I liked this. It was faithful to its predecessor. It didn't attempt to subvert what made the original so enjoyable, it played to its strengths and gives the audience what they came to see.

If I am going to complain about anything? I think it went on a bit too long and took a while to get to the point.

Plot-wise (I know it's difficult) I would've liked to have seen Alec Baldwin & Gina Davis return, but that might be asking too much. But that doesn't make this any less enjoyable.

The rest of the original cast and the introduction of Ortega was an excellent choice.

In a world of shameless cash-grab sequels, this one isn't one of them.

Terminator Zero (2024– )

An interesting and unique take

[7/10 · 10 September 2024]

Considering just how poor the more recent installments of the Terminator franchise have been (the last two were absolute dumpster fires) I have to give this series credit for taking a new angle while trying to pay homage to the original James Cameron masterpieces.

Having read the novelizations of both T1 & T2, there is no real room for this plot to function at all. The whole time travel device is a dark science; foreign even to Skynet itself. When it deployed the T800 to 1984 & the T1000 to 1994, it had absolutely no idea if it would be successful, as it was destroyed moments before Tech Com got inside & took it offline.

So humans in the future developing TDE as a strategic weapon is completely implausible.

But if you're not an "elite" fan, this needn't bother you. It's fiction after all.

Sticking to the positives, its set pieces are thrilling and mostly keep in the spirit of the original two films; the pursuit, the horror element & the gun play (especially from T1). I especially liked the new version of the LAPD massacre.

It also attempts to discuss the moral and ethical dilemmas that come with creating weaponised AI and also touches on the "bootstrap" paradox which was the over reaching plot arc of both films.

This instalment won't be for everyone which is understandable.

But it's a damn sight better than the bilge Hollywood has recently served up.

To all the die hard fans of JCs originals; I say give it a chance and keep an open mind.

Unfrosted (2024)

Nostalgic, funny and silly without being crass

[8/10 · 12 May 2024]

This is just a goofy, light hearted film about corporate espionage and capitalism. It doesn't go over the top with any sort of underlying message or theme. And it's worth a look just for cast alone. My personal favourite was Bill Burr playing JFK. I was in hysterics seeing him with a full head of hair doing his ridiculous accent.

Even the comedians I don't particularly like were good value for this one.

If you're after something not too serious, not too tawdry but still endearing and enjoyable, give it a watch. Younger audiences may struggle with the nostalgic references dating back to the 60s but that means they haven't studied history!

Subverting The Cold War eras threat of "Mutually Assured Destruction" and replacing it with "Who will be the next world super power of breakfast cereal?"

Abstractly hilarious.

I see low scoring reviews on most films and often agree. But not this time. At time of posting, the overall score is just over 5. I honestly believe it deserves much higher.

Monkey Man (2024)

Brilliant directing debut... But an R18 rating IMO

[8/10 · 7 April 2024]

This is a great film, but not for the faint hearted. It is EXTREMELY violent & very confronting. The protagonists motivation makes John Wicks plight look like a college road trip. The fight choreography is top notch along with the acting. The pacing is steady and measured, but when things heat up, they quickly boil over. Visually, it's fantastic; it highlights India's beautiful village life as well as its brutal and filthy street life. It's a gritty film of contrasts, violence, spirituality & revenge.

Would NOT recommend as a first date option or seeing it with your grandma. Even if you're a parent who doesn't mind taking the kids to see violent movies, this one might be a stretch.

The Super Mario Bros. Movie (2023)

Loved It!

[9/10 · 18 November 2023]

I'm going to show my age by saying I'm old enough to remember playing the original Mario Bros on the NES & Mario Kart on the SNES.

I had a blast watching this! It is so much nostalgic fun for us Gen X/Millenials AND a visual feast for any who have kids. It does everything you'd expect a Mario Bros film to do. It doesn't try to be pretentious or edgy. It doesn't water itself down in order to encompass a "broader" audience.

It's plays to its strengths, which is what fans want; A movie that is an enhanced gaming experience all over - level design, musical arrangement, action set pieces.

Don't listen to the haters. You'll never please everbody.

My version of a Super Mario Bros movie was the obscure one with Bob Hoskins. A very odd take on the universe in which the game is set.

Had this modern version been released in the early 90s, we would've lost our minds at how perfect it is.

As an added bonus, there is PLENTY of room for a successful sequel as we were not yet introduced to Wario.

Silo (2023– )

On episode 7 and I can't stay awake

[5/10 · 24 July 2023]

I must be missing something. I was intrigued by the first two episodes. Then they started killing characters left, right & centre. There are so many loose ends and flashbacks it makes it hard to follow. Not to mention the endless dialogue! I had actually forgotten the plot of the original characters who had gone out to "clean".

When there was an opportunity to kill the latest protagonist (She was literally hanging off a rail, ready to plunge hundreds of metres to her death), the would-be murderer somehow botches it.

I consider myself fairly patient, but this is really just dragging on now.

I had more fun watching the murder mystery of "Wednesday" instead.

The Banshees of Inisherin (2022)

Dementia on film

[5/10 · 21 January 2023]

The cast get full marks for acting their parts. The cinematography is top notch.

The plot is where this movie goes completley sideways. Another reviewer said one must be in a certain mindset to watch this film and I have to agree.

It's bleak, melancholy and at times, deeply disturbing. Scenes of self mutilation, pyromania and even child abuse are prevalent in the film.

What is the source of all these horrible things?

One grown man decides he longer wants to be best friends with another grown man. And just like a 14 year old girl, he cuts him off without any warning or provocation.

That's it. That is literally the plot.

I left this film feeling depressed, confused and irritated. Do not watch if you're in the mood for something uplifting. You won't find it here.

The Batman (2022)

Dark, Brooding, Boring at times.

[6/10 · 19 December 2022]

Good cinematography and soundtrack. But this movie is way too long. The Riddlers constant, garbled wailing got really old really fast.

A few other silly things that were overlooked in this film;

*Who TF stands right next to a bomb when they can see it counting down to an iminent explosion? There's being tough. And then there's being stupid. Batman literally watches a bomb explode that is strapped to a man's neck inches away from him. Not so much as a blister on his face, didn't lose an eye, no burns. Nothing.

*Before he awakens after the explosion, surrounded by scores of GPD officers, not one of them attempted to unmask him! People, the city has been complaining about a masked vigilante undermining the police force and when they finally have him in their territory, comatose, no one attempts to confirm his identity?

*Penguin uses a very nice, very new Maserati as a getaway veichle which is also used as a battering ram and subsequently PIT maneuvered by Batman, causing it to flip violently.

Not a single airbag is deployed. Did I mention how nice and new this car was?

*During his wingsuit escape from GPD, why would Batman deploy his parachute at the exact same moment he attempts to fly under a bridge? How dumb are the directors here?

That aside, the rest of the movie is stupid, dark fun. But it hasn't earned the hype it's getting here.

Shave 30 or 40 minutes of staredowns and it becomes easier to digest.

Into the Wild (2007)

A rare gem that stays with you.

[10/10 · 25 October 2022]

Cinematography, acting, the soundtrack. It's incredible! Firstly, congratulations must go to Sean Penn, I usually detest films that jump back and forth chronologically. But he chooses his moments well.

Would I call Christopher McCandless a hero?

No. For me a hero is someone that puts themselves in danger to protect their loved ones or the weaker from harm; Neighbours who rush into burning houses to rescue babies etc.

However, if his portrayal is an accurate representation of the man himself, then he is intriguing, fascinating and extremely bold. (Some might say to the point of stupidity).

His reasons for leaving are understandable. But how he left took balls of steel. Most youths would search for alternatives within the society Chris was trying to escape from.

He just donates his life savings and then vanishes with barley a trace. This leaves his family (especially his innocent sister) devastated.

I certainly don't judge him for what he did.

From there on, the world is his and what a beautiful world it is! The scenery and the loveable characters he meets along the way, just glorious.

But it's not all a Jamboree. He is also tested with acts of violence and brutal lessons that come with mere survival.

There are so many lessons to take from watching this movie, regardless of whether or not you empathise with his plight;

Love your family. Love your children.

Bring your A game when in mother nature's shear presence. She is beautiful but owes you no kindness at all.

And finally;

Happiness is only real when shared.

Face/Off (1997)

Silly fun

[7/10 · 18 October 2022]

If you're younger and are watching this in the 2020's then I can see why you may deride this film. I was a teenager when it came out and during the 80s/90s, we were fed whatever stories were conjured up. We had no way of challenging it's premise. No way of cross-referencing it's plausibility. A movie with Cage and Travolta came out, we paid money to go see it, we discussed if we liked/disliked it. That's it.

So as far as 90s action movies go, it's an absolute cracker. Is it ridiculous? Of course it is. Back then if we wanted realism, we'd seek out documantries.

Visually, the movie is sort of a stop-gap measure where real special effects were present but being phased out and CGI was in its crude infancy.

It must be difficult for the younger generation to appreciate this film because they have boundless access to information and other exciting things that we did not.

If you're one of them, try to imagine watching it knowing there is no social media. No hand held Oracle's of information in our pockets etc.

The Adventures of Milo and Otis (1986)

9/10 when I was a kid. 1/10 now I'm an adult

[1/10 · 12 October 2022]

If you're an adult and you like this movie, you're either an idiot, a sadist or both.

Children get a pass for loving this movie because they do not yet understand the difference between simulated cruelty and actual cruelty.

If this film was animated, it would be fine because the distressing scenarios that are portrayed would be just simulations. Our imaginations can be captured, but not at the expense of living creatures.

However, this was filmed in 1986. No CGI existed and the footage used is real world. That means an actual cat was placed in a box and hurtled down a waterfall. An actual pug was drowned in a stream during a physical confrontation with a bear.

This is just a few of the horrible things that numerous animals went through during filming.

The plot is fine for children, the scenery is beautiful. Even the narration is good for a laugh. But they're the only positives.

Animal welfare was concept completely alien to everyone involved in making this film. Look, I despise cancel culture and I typically scoff at reboots that pander to percieved cultural sensibilities.

But animal cruelty is never funny. No matter what era it occurred in.

So this movie is a perfect candidate for an overhaul, Use CGI or whatever. Just don't use real animals for scenes where danger is imminent.

Thor: Love and Thunder (2022)

"Thor! I'm perishing!"

[5/10 · 28 September 2022]

It's not bad. But it's not exactly great either. Overweight Russel Crowe playing Zeus with a very questionable Greek accent? It was meant to be funny and I did chuckle, but I did so for the wrong reason;

The same way you politely laugh at someones bad punchline to absorb awkwardness.

Christian Bales performance was pretty solid. He did his best to plug holes in what was, metaphorically, a sinking ship. Another review claimed that Thor had been relegated to a bumbling idiot. But if you study ancient Norse mythology, thats who Thor was; a big, strong, drunken doofus.

I can see why this movie frustrated fans of the franchise. It appears to be in somewhat of a nose dive and I think that Deadpool and Wolverine are the prime candidates to get it back on track.

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (2015–2019)

Literally dated someone that did this.

[3/10 · 31 July 2022]

This sort of sociopathic behaviour is not to be laughed at. As a man who has literally been followed by a woman just like this, my feelings ranged from irritating to just down right terrifying.

There's no way you'd laugh at this song and dance rubbish about someones inability to move on with life if it were an obsessed man stalking a woman across the country. It'd be framed as a drama/thriller where the male protagonist is deeply disturbed and would require immediate incarceration in prison or mental health facility.

Oh, but because the obsessed is a pretty woman, she gets to sing and dance her way across the country and its viewed as "whimsical" and "charming".

It's not. Mental illness is not a joke. Nor is stalking people, regardless of gender.

It diminishes the plight of those who suffer from mental illness as well as those who become victims as a result.

Resident Evil (2022)

A slap in the face to OG fans.

[1/10 · 19 July 2022]

These sporadic high ratings will tell you it stays true to elements of the game. Yet they can't reference basic elements of said game. If you want to make a RE series, then just make one! The material is all there and so many angles to approach from.

How about Wesker, Birkin and the subsequent outbreak? You could have an episode with Sherry hiding in the sewers/RPD.

How about Chief Irons interactions with Birkin collaborating in the cover up and subsequent betrayal of the STARS members?

You could get at least a few episodes portraying how Wesker infiltrates the STARS and shadows them around the Spencer mansion, testing their combat capabilities against his monstrosities.

But no, they go off on a wild tangent, pick a very fine plot thread and augment it in an attempt to call it RE.

Call it something else and it wouldn't be so bad. But Resident Evil, it is not.

A "Jill Sandwich" is more Resident Evil than this.

Top Gun: Maverick (2022)

Good fun. But it's just Star Wars IV

[7/10 · 8 June 2022]

I suppose this movie did what it was supposed to do. It did get ludicrous towards the end though. Overall it was good fun, if not extremely derivative.

I won't give too much away. But watch the movie with these parallels in mind;

Tom Cruise = Obi Wan Kenobi

Val Kilmer = Yoda

Rooster = Luke Skywalker

Russian Base (they don't come out and say it, but it's clearly Russian) = Death Star.

Bel-Air (2022– )

Fresh Prince, but not for prime-time

[8/10 · 16 May 2022]

Will Smith (the real one) is a total trainwreck and I feel his recent public outburst will have people scoring this show spitefully low.

However, it does harness the darker narratives that the original sitcom only scratched the surface with.

To those complaining that it lacks the warmth and humour of the original, I say this;

You've missed the point.

Right from the release of the first trailer, Bel-Air is portrayed as an excessively lavish paradise with a much darker vibe than the original. It never set out to be a comedy, rather a retelling of Wills (and by extension, his families) plight.

All the characters are there, even my favourite, Geoffrey. His role has been repurposed from being a wise-cracking Butler to the families live-in security detail. He's ever vigilant and watches over the children as if they were his own ;)

Hillarys role moves a little further away from the ditsy/bimbo character she used to be. She's still obsessed with fashion and vanity, but is soon challenged when her obsession with social media puts her in a rather compromising position.

Carlton is still daddy's boy. However, his character has been augmented in this show. He suffers from severe anxiety and addiction issues with the by-product being that he becomes thoroughly dislikeable. Where as in the 90s, he was still humorous, if not mildly annoying.

Will arriving in his home is an immediate threat to his need for validation as well as his social standing at school.

Ashley is the perennial sweet heart with a rebellious streak. In the comedy, she would look up to Will as an example of self-expression and individuality. Here, in 2022, she tends to be overlooked by the family due to the distractions surrounding them. As a result she's left to grapple with her own sexuality as she enters adulthood.

The characters are given so much more depth. The only way to accomplish this is to re-tool the genre from comedy to drama.

By doing this, they're also able to examine politics and power plays amongst the ultra wealthy and powerful of African American society.

If you switch this on expecting comedy, you will be disappointed. This show is not funny, nor is it intended to be.

However, if you're capable of re-imagining your beloved childhood sitcom in a more adult/drama-based format with better story telling, then step right up.

Metal Lords (2022)

Praise the loud!

[9/10 · 9 April 2022]

Being a rock/metal bassist myself, I must declare my innate bias in favour of this movie.

As a kid who grew up listening to 80s thrash metal, this move resonates very well with me. I loved the soundtrack and the cameos they pulled off for this movie.

This film is just like the genre of metal, itself;

You either get it. Or you don't.

Fans of the genre will enjoy it on at least some level.

Morbius (2022)

Meh

[4/10 · 6 April 2022]

Predictable, paper-thin plot with a virtually non-existent climax. Most likely building up to something bigger and better, but for now, it's just not that great. If you want a cool vampire movie from Marvel Studios, stick to Blade.

Two and a Half Men (2003–2015)

Wanted to hate it after they killed Charlie

[7/10 · 15 January 2022]

This show was a family favourite during Charlie's tenure. We watched it on free-to-air well before the invention of streaming services and laughed until we cried! So when they killed Charlie, I flatly refused to watch another episode.

Then streaming services were invented and more recently, lockdowns were too.

I had an opportunity to binge watch all the way through and give Walden a chance.

I have to hand it to the writers; with a little bit of suspension of disbelief, clever writing and subtle character development, they just managed to pull out of the nosedive that was Charlie Sheens disposal.

But only just.

Where Charlie was a boarish, wise-crackin', alcoholic, ladies man, Walden is a sweet natured, man-child who makes mistakes due to his ignorance (as opposed to Charlie's arrogance).

As a result, much of the friction between the two brothers that we all so came to love, practically disappears.

To ramify this, the writers have augmented the base characteristics of Alan. We all knew him to be a pathetic loser, but that was tempered by Charlie's "Winning" mentality.

To balance out Waldens good nature and kindness, Alan becomes even more detestable and even more unlikable;

(Repeatedley faking heart attacks, stealing quarters of Waldens dresser and basically looking for anything that will extend is already very free ride living in that house.)

It's not the formula we're used to, but the writers have done fairly well considering they lost their major draw card that was Charlie Sheen.

MacGruber (2021)

See the film to understand the series better.

[7/10 · 31 December 2021]

This, like it's predecessor, is deliberate stupidity of the highest order. Take it seriously at your own peril. You'll either get it or you won't.

There's nothing wrong with you if you don't.

There might be if you do! Haha.

It's over the top, stupid, cringey and hilarious all rolled into one. It stays fairly faithful to its original movie chemistry.

Personally, I marvel at how much of a hilariously colossal dick-head Macgruber is. It's like watching a train wreck in slow motion.

Watch this with the same philosophy you'd watch NASCAR;

You really don't care who wins. You're more interested in seeing the results of someone else's abject stupidity.

I give it a 7 based on its faithfulness to its original.

But I understand why people score it way less.

Turning Point: 9/11 and the War on Terror (2021)

Bias through omission, yet again

[3/10 · 2 September 2021]

The images are driven into us every September; Those doomed airlines slamming into towers 1 & 2, over and over again. Then imagery of the alleged bearded mastermind is quickly paraded again infront of us to invoke a sense of rage and disgust at these foreigners that would do the world's greatest democracy harm.

But what about WTC tower 7? Does anyone know about that? It was a significantly smaller building that was also destroyed in the same wave of attacks. Yet, no plane struck it. How did it fall?

We still don't know as know talks about it.

The Pentagon was allegedly struck by a commercial aircraft, yet there is not a SINGLE IMAGE that can be produced of any type of wreckage. There's evidence of an explosion and the ensuing aftermath, sure.

But no surveillance footage available? Any landing gear in the wreck? Chairs? Engine components? Charred framework? Same question goes for the alleged plane that went down in a field in Pennsylvania. It's just a picture of a big hole with people in bio hazard suits standing around it.

This documentary drives home what did happen with extreme prejudice and runs for the hills when it comes to the things that didn't.

It also might want to take a good look at the Bush dynasties close links to American weapons contractors as well. Companies, some of which had profits skyrocket 1000% as result of the following "war on terror".

There's far more to this than the simple narrative of; "Brown men bombed us! Now go to war!"

Animal Kingdom (2016–2022)

Makes The Sons of Anarchy look like members of MENSA

[4/10 · 18 July 2021]

As silly as it was, one of the redeeming qualities of SOA was that you empathised with the characters and their complications. From early on, you already get an idea of who you like and dislike because each member is an individual. Based on those individual traits, you form your own inter-screen connection with that character.

Animal Kingdom attempts to emulate the brotherhood that was the underlying theme of Sons. But straight off the bat, all the brothers are overly hostile, testosterone fuelled, one dimensional frat boys with almost no redeeming qualities. I dislike all of them. Even though they're central to the plot, I'm already barracking for a stray bullet to cancel one (or more) of them out.

By stark comparison, I had tears in my eyes when Opie Winston from SOA sacrificed himself in prison to protect his brothers. DEVASTATED when the wise and jolly Bobby was brutally tortured then murdered infront of his president.

Another problem is that you can't be a sustainable criminal enterprise if all your crew are macho, chest beating man-babies with serious mommy issues.

You need aggression. But you also need insight, intellect and reason if you are going to be successful criminals.

SOA illustrated this well when their resident hot head would act on impulse and thus throw the club into further chaos.

In this show, they're ALL hot heads. And therefore, unsustainable.

Yeah, it's fiction. But please, credit the viewer with some intellect.

How to Become a Tyrant: Crush Your Rivals (2021) Season 1, Episode 2

Imbalanced. Factual, but bbiased through omission

[4/10 · 11 July 2021]

For all the bad stuff this guy did, which is true, (he was a maniac that met a fitting end) his rise to power in this documentary is over simplified. I'm not saying the sources are incorrect. I'm saying there were other factors at play. America's contribution to this psychopaths uprising is a glaring omission and a huge reason why they invaded the country twice.

Summarily; Saddam made a deal with the dark powers of the US government that would consolidate his power even further. The deal was struck, but he renegged. Uncle Sam is now pissed and needs to find a way to get their end back BUT without being exposed as a democracy that funds tyranny. Enter the false accusations of WMDs, spurious links to Al Qaeda and subsequent illegal invasion of Iraq, which technically, makes both Bush presidents war criminals.

You're welcome.

America: The Motion Picture (2021)

Take this seriously at your own peril

[7/10 · 5 July 2021]

It's satire, plan and simple. Whether or not you get the joke depends on your upbringing.

Is it "woke"? At times, yes. But it's executed with humour and doesn't take itself too seriously like most typical woke culture movements do.

Objectively, this film holds up a warped mirror to the paradox that is America and everything it stands for - good and bad.

If you're a "god fearin', flag wavin', bible readin' Murican". This movie may upset you. But that just means you have no sense of humour. This movie satirises and targets everyone. All are included.

And isn't that what its all about?

Collateral (2004)

Good cast. Good acting. Good story. Faulty plot.

[6/10 · 14 April 2021]

Not much else to say. My banner prettt much sums it up. It's an enjoyable film, but preposterously written. Employ a suspension of disbelief and you'll be fine.