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Bleach: Burîchu (2018)
Insult to the original
Bleach anime and manga were epic though it fell hard over the years and then got cancelled. Have to say that i was very excited that live action was being made and couldn't wait to watch it, now i regret watching it. Characters are nothing like the original, story and concept changed as well which makes this live action feel like it is a rip off of the original.. This was truly an insult to the original anime series and manga, as a fan of Bleach series this was very hard to watch and wouldn't recommend any bleach fan to watch.
The VVitch: A New-England Folktale (2015)
Not worth watching
heard allot about the movie and saw the 7-star rating on IMDb, but yet again IMDb rating are just as reliable as an old condom. What is wrong with people who have rated so highly for this movie? I mean come one people should have higher standard. This movie was not scary at all, instead it was just gruesome and pathetic.
First scene starts off with a family banished from a town then poor banished family settles on a open land surrounded by creepy trees. First the youngest baby disappears, kidnapped by the old naked witch just to turned into baby paste (YES BABY WAS GRINDED DOWN IN A MORTAR WITH A LARGE PASTEL, DISGUSTING!!!) then she puts on the baby paste all over herself. Next well scenes of day to day life of the banished family with scenes of incest little brother who is horny for his older sister (YES LITTLE BRO KEEPS PEEKING DOWN HIS SISTERS SHIRT!!!! WTF!!!!!). After they have given up on search for the baby, the incest little bro didn't give up and ended up going with his sister into the woods to look for the baby only to have himself lost in the woods. The sister finds her way back home meanwhile the little bro finds the witches lair or den or nest whatever you want to call it. Witch changed herself into a steaming hot chick, little bro getting all turned on gets seduced by the witch (predictable much?). anyway father goes looking for the boy but does find him however during some night the sister finds the little bro naked around the farms fence. Of course the boy is all crazy and dying coz he is cursed, after that the entire family (didn't mentioned the youngest twin bro and sis coz they are just annoying) accuse the older sister of being a witch. Well of course she isn't a witch but after few weird ass scenes of little bro suffocating and spitting blood he dies. Father then goes all crazy and boxes all the kids into a sheep pen because he thinks they are cursed and witches. Well middle of the night for some odd reason the witch (naked showing her old old old disgusting ass) comes into the little shed and I guess eating the sheep that was in it with the kids screaming in fear. The Father wakes up in the morning to find that entire shed and livestock destroyed and dead except the older sister, then started screaming and going crazy only to be impaled by the sheep's horns, ergo dies just like that. Mother who was in bad shape losing the youngest baby and then the oldest son and getting her boobs pecked by a crow (which was a disgusting scene btw) tries to kill the only surviving daughter because she also thinks that she is a witch. The daughter in order to save herself kills the mother (SELF DEFENSE!!!!!), after crying and moaning, poor girl all devastated cries herself to sleep in her house. When she wakes up, having nothing left calls on the devil, after a little chat and making her take her clothes off, gives her a book and guides her to a witch orgy in the middle of the forest (what's with the nakedness?) then all the witches including herself started to float and that's the end of the movie.
So that's about it, the whole movie is written in one paragraph so don't bother wasting your time watching it. You are better off watching the conjuring which is far better movie and very entertaining.
The 5th Wave (2016)
Badly written and directed - Not worth watching
This movie could have been so much better and it just completely got flushed down the drain. Again as always IMDb rating cannot be relied on.
To start this movie does have slightly interesting CGI scenes that is the only reason I rated this movie 2 stars, otherwise it would have been 1 (as there is not 0 star option). Story of the movie is lacks creativity, depth, originality and it just keeps on going and going just for the sake of movie concept and ends in a disappointing finish lacking any imagination what so ever. In this day an age where some TV series have amazing story, there is no room for having such badly directed and written movie. As for acting, I have seen some of the main actors in other movie and they did well, for example Chloë Grace Moretz did pretty well in kick ass, so doesn't make sense that her acting didn't have any emotion or character to it. It just felt hollow and lame, so I would blame the director for directing such a crap movie.
Coming back to story again, it didn't even have a point or a decent conclusion or a concept. Just the typical SIFI genre, aliens come to earth (alien ship kind of like the one from movie District 9), brings down destruction of human race by a first very cliché EMP, followed by flood and plague like the story of MOSES then alien vs human troops which btw is so stupid because why would such an advance race that can cause flood and multiply crows overnight want to kill remaining humans in such a painstakingly slow way and inefficient way?
TIPS for people who actually made the movie. Aliens who visit or can visit earth via space ship are expected to be very highly advance technologically and advanced in their evolutionary stage so why are they a parasitic alien who have to take over humans in order to move around. That doesn't sound like an advanced lifeform, even in the movie ALIEN the xenophobe didn't operate space ships even though they were smart but they only killed (which is more believable). A good movie is smart movie where the viewers believes your story, concept and how you portray it. This movie didn't even show how the aliens got inside the humans, how on earth did a high school girl become RAMBO all the sudden, why would such an advance alien race would want to use humans (childrens in this case) to kill remaining humans (its just stupid idea), hybrid alien who falls in love with a high school girl by just looking at her? Kinda insulting to us guy's coz we are not that desperate or pervs!
OK I can go on forever pointing out lame things in this movie so
I leave it to viewers imagination and to enjoy pointing out stupid things in the movie to enjoy it and kill time till the movie finishes.
Bølgen (2015)
Please DO NOT watch this movie
I cannot believe i actually watched this movie. it was absolutely horrible, i mean i cannot keep on stop saying how horrible it was. The concept and story of the movie was decent and they could have done so much more with it, but they have completely ruined it.
there are so many scenes that just are so stupid that it doesn't even make sense as a fiction, acting is horrible, i watched it dubbed in English so maybe thats why the movie was even worse. Having said that the wave effect is very good and huge applause to the team behind the whole wave effect because that is literally the only part of the entire movie which was good.
For some reason this movie has good rating and review on IMDb which i really don't understand. WHY and HOW can this movie be anything above 1 star. To explain how stupid this movie is, in one scene the entire city tsunami alarm goes off and hotel staff rushes to each room to wake up and evacuate their customers. Yet customers are asking stupid question, why we have to go? hey i left my clothes!, what is happening.etc... SERIOUSLY?? nobody takes a TSUNAMI warning as a joke and believe me coz i come from a country prone to tsunami.
Second stupid scene people are awake because of the tsunami warning alarm and jumping into their cars and leaving (to go to higher grounds) yet they are stuffing their cars with luggage... WHAT???? TSUNAMI is coming and they don't have the time or the luxury to be packing for a picnic or vacation. it is common sense LEAVE EVERYTHING AND RUN when a tsunami is coming. its just very unrealistic.
Third stupid scene people are rushing uphill in their vehicle but due to congestion "traffic" (which doesn't make sense in such a small town that has tsunami evacuation protocols) the protagonist abandons his car and urges others to abandon their own cars and run uphill instead, which is the correct thing to do in that situation. the protagonist comes up to another car and ushers them out of the car with a family in it (father, mother and little son) and why the they were still in the car were still in it is beyond me), the mother gets out and and comes around the car but gets pinned by the moron driving in the car in front of them. she gets her leg broken and cant move, yet the husband and son leaves her behind because the protagonist told them to while the protagonist stays and saves her butt from the situation. WHY WHY WHY would a husband leave his own wife in such a situation and leave it to some stranger to save his wife??????? OMG!!!!
Forth stupid thing, well for people who live in areas where flood or tsunami have devastated their area knows that its effect is very serious. aside from peoples houses, infrastructure, etc getting destroyed, people die as well so the early warning system is taken very seriously. people working at such centers who monitor situations that may cause such natural devastation (including tornado) takes all sensor reading very seriously. However in the movie TWO sensors go down and people working there act all chilled out and if it doesn't make any difference. After the protagonist convinced the team of the seriousness of the situation, they decided to investigate the sensors. COME ON this doesn't happen EVER!
Fifth stupid thing, when an avalanche occurred the protagonist tells the woman at the early warning center to sound the alarm, she looks reluctant, confused, afraid and takes her own sweet time to press the alarm. WHAT!!!!! HOW STUPID DO YOU HAVE TO BE! oh also such a horrible acting it just wasted the entire scenes effect.
OK i can keep on ranting on about how many stupid scenes there were in this movie so i will leave it at the top 5 i mentioned, but there are more. for example in one scene the protagonist drives up to the warning center with his kids in the car. He leaves his car parked and tell the kids he will be right back, but he leaves for hours to investigate the senors and the mountain. WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!!!!! its so fake! i mean come on!!!...
anyway please don't watch this movie and please stop rating horrible movies so high. This movie was an insult to people who were watching it. Oh and theaters should mention that the movie is dubbed.
The Cabin in the Woods (2011)
Stupid movie
For the life of me I have no idea why so many people liked this movie. This movie is just stupid, plain stupid, very stupid and even more stupid. Watched this movie because of decent rating on IMDb and was shocked!
Now to describe the movie, first part of movie is the typical Friday the 13 type where good looking teens or college students spend their holiday in secluded godforsaken lakeside location that does not seem hospitable what so ever or a place where anyone will go to spend their holidays.
Then death, gore and mayhem starts, right after some nudity to keep the audience interested
..
Second part of the movie (with a hint of it in the first part) seems like something from Condemned where people are watching those people kill each other, in this case the kids at the lake side location. Its also kind of like that crappy TV show Ascension. Meanwhile those kids are terrified and running away from all the pointless killing.
Third part of the movie (which is basically coming to an end) is combination of all the bad guys from Buffy the vampire slayer, Angel and some other horror flicks wreaking havoc on (yes you guessed it) the people who were watching the kids get killed. The movie is very predictable except for the reason they unleashed all that torment and misery on those kids which I guess was something new.
I have to admit I did like the idea of why they were getting those kids killed that is the concept but still it was such a stupid movie. Could have made it so much better so it is quite unfortunate that the movie was so stupid.
American Ultra (2015)
Entertaining movie
An entertaining movie with action and comedy about a stoner teen who turns out to be a CIA agent a product of experimental program. Teenager who is slow, stoned, weak willed and seemingly living a very mediocre life is somewhat can be related to normal life of an average teenager, which then completely changes as he is activated.
Story progresses well-paced which keeps you entertained throughout the movie though the whole movie seems pretty dark and depressing. Both Jesse Eisenberg and Kristen Stewart did a good job portraying their role which is a major factor in the movie being as entertaining as it is.
This is defiantly a movie to watch with bunch of friends for a laugh and entertainment. Though this is not a movie you would want to watch again or own a copy of but do watch it if you want to have some fun.
G-Saviour (1999)
Insult to Gundam Series
Big fan of Gundam series and couldn't believe they actually made such a horrible movie from such an epic Japanese animated title. Story is rubbish and the "Gundam" action and design were amateur at bests. This movie is an insult to all Gundam fans and I feel sorry for those whose first experience watching Gundam was this movie. Do not waste your time watching this movie and an advice to the makers of the movie, please watch the original series (out of many) and try to understand the concept of Gundam. If you want to remake Japanese classic animation series into a movie then please stick to power rangers which is FYI also horrible. Don't waste your time watching this movie even if someone offers it for free.
Shingeki no kyojin (2015)
Huge disappointment
Such a huge disappointment that was it upsetting. This movie completely ruins the plot, story, character and adds useless drama to an epic story by Hajime Isayama. Scenes of the Titan attacking the city were made up of actors in cheap spandex costumes rampaging thru a fake model city which looked like it was taken form old Ultraman or Godzilla Japanese TV series. Character's story from the original anime or manga did not even exist, instead they added lame and cheap drama which was very poorly executed and looked forcefully inserted. Some effects were pretty cool but this movie cannot be called a movie adaptation of Attack on Titan (Shingeki no Kyojin) because it doesn't follow any story from the original manga or anime aside from the titans and names. It looks like this movie was created to cash in on a successful anime and manga series. If you are a fan of the original anime or manga then be prepared to be disappointed.