kechupydeath Reviews

The Genius Club (2006)

Being a genius takes very little these days

[1/10 · 9 October 2008]

This whole movie was made to make people aware of the world's problems. I can admire that, but there's one catch. Every theory in this movie is wrong. The so called "geniuses" have no knowledge about even the basic of science or no understanding of how the world works. It cannot enlighten you to, as it's supposed to do, it can only through you deeper into the dark with ignorant debates on religion, medicine, economy and politics.

The only spark of genius this movie had was implementing 2nd grade riddles into the story. The answers are banal yet the geniuses take their time to answer and not all of them even can. By this movie's standards of "genius", 3 quarters of the planet's population should be deemed masterminds of knowledge and everything else.

As a standalone movie with a horribly stupid script it's pretty good. If you like bad acting, bad cinematography, bad editing, bad plots, bad light effects, bad characters, pathetic flashbacks and cozy dumb endings then this movie's for you.

Mutant Chronicles (2008)

Unique oldschool action

[10/10 · 13 July 2008]

In the future the world will be governed by 4 factions, the year is 2707 and war for resources is a constant element of life. But by restarting an ancient soldier factory the nations unleash a new threat and now their heroes must unite to fight the common foe of humanity.

This sounds very reminiscent of old video games stories. The clear path that the heroes must take, the obvious foe, heroism, uncanny clergy men, all these things bring me back to a time when saving the world was my daily routine. To put it more simple, this whole movie feels like a very lengthy video game cutscene. It may at a glance seem corny but it's so masterfully done that it makes you wait for the loading screen to appear and send you into action. It's as if they made a movie out of a game that didn't come out yet, or they just cut out all the playable parts of a game to make a full length movie, either way it still has a unique effect.

As a standalone movie it's fantastic. Most of of the movie is filmed behind a blue/green screen. But don't expect stunning realistic CGI or things like that, in fact the special effects look lazy but it's clearly done intentionally because it gives this surreal effect to the whole movie. The setting looks like a steampunk version of the WW2 era coated with steam-powered spaceships, yes, steam-powered spaceships. Frankly it brings me back to games like BloodRayne or Castle Wolfenstein, it having the full cast of political parties: democrats, communists, and fascists/Nazis.

In conclusion this movie's a gem. One of the best and most original I've seen in quite a while. You know it's good cause it keeps you at the edge of your seat even though the ending is clear from the very beginning.

Wanted (2008)

Wanted something better

[7/10 · 30 June 2008]

I had a lot of expectations for this one. The visuals seemed stunning, the action heart-throbbing and the cast remarkable. And those thing were there but I just couldn't shake the feeling of this movie being nothing more than a paycheck.

All the memorable dialog, scenes and concepts seemed all TOO familiar. The bullet cam was taken from the video game Max Payne, the keyboard to the face scene from an internet show called PurePwnage, the last line was also taken from a famous Bob Ross parody, the train cart scene was reminiscent of an old children's show based on a popular toy, and I could go on...

I can look away and call them a coincidence but the last straw was the story. It was preposterously bad! Nothing made any sense, it seemed like they just pulled it out of a hat to house the action. All the characters the protagonist has to fight have no depth to them, this guy can do this, this guy can do that and in the end the hero has to fight the guys that can do this or that. Pathetic...

As I exited the theater trying to keep my mind off the senseless favorable criticism that was going on behind me, I heard someone say "If I was 13 and saw this movie, it would've been the best movie ever". And that's what it is, a children's movie that tried to captivate the adult mind through pointless sex scenes and drama.

Joshua (2006)

What horror movies are supposed to be like

[8/10 · 23 July 2006]

I would like to start by saying that this is a very original movie. Usually when I watch a horror flick I sit back and relax admiring the heroine. But this is nothing like the "horror" movies that we all know. It keeps you on the edge right until the very end. The main characteristic would be the plot twists, the story's kept a secret the whole time. The camera movement and the music add to the psychotic feeling of, quite frankly, all the scenes. It's not the sort of movie you would want watching a second time. There are a lot of disturbing scenes and about all the characters are demented, this leading to a very upsetting outtake on reality. So go see it if you want to watch something original but keep in mind that it's, hopefully, just a movie.

The Mangler (1995)

Not that boring as expected

[7/10 · 19 July 2006]

I'm a big Stephen King fan, and I've seen a great deal of movies based on his books. I'll make this short, fact is that there are other movies (based on SK's stories) that are worse than this one. I've read the story a while back and can't remember it to well but I do know that this movie has put a couple a new elements to it. Come to think of it, even the characters are a tad different (but I can't say it's 'bad' different, either). Long story short: if you're a SK fan go see it, it's at least enjoyable, if not... well, if not you'll probably think horrendous, I can't even picture myself watching it if I haven't read the story first (or if I weren't a SK fan).

2005 MTV Movie Awards (2005 TV Special)

worst MTVMA ever

[3/10 · 19 August 2005]

I'm sure everybody has seen at least an MTV Movie Awards, so you know what to expect from it: those funny parody movies, lots of celebrities, cool bands, etc. Frankly MTVMA has been in a downfall for over 3 years know so don't expect anything amazing out of this one. Sure it has some nice parts but if you add those so called "nice parts" you end up with about 20 minutes of a good show. This leaves a whole hour of senseless speeches and a very dubious presentation of a certain number of movies. Personally I'm outraged to see Lindsey Lohan win over Hilary Swank, "even a blind man could see" that Lindsey Lohan can't act and can't possibly out-act an Oscar winner. Don't even get me started on those award speeches, if people find those things funny these days then that means that I'm from planet Venus, literally. I mean, if those celebrities knew that they would be presenting or winning an award they could at least spend 10 minutes at home making a decent speech for those who have a +100 IQ. To conclude I want to say that this show was really bad except for those 20 minutes mentioned earlier which, quite frankly, make the hole show worth it. If you're a Lindsey Lohan fan say YES to the awards, if an Al Pacino (or any Oscar-winning actors) fan just say HELL NO! (unless you have a lot, and I mean A LOT of free time)

Out for Blood (2004 Video)

Ain't worth it...

[2/10 · 8 July 2005]

Okey, this movie is one of the worst movies ever. Why? I'll tell you why: bad acting, bad storyline, bad special effects, pathetic characters. This is the worst vampire story ever, I always thought that vampires were the most charismatic of all fictional creatures but this movie turns them into a pack of horny stupid teenagers, literally. If you want a good vampire story I suggest to you playing all of the Legacy of Kain series (best story written ever), I assure you that in no other story you'll find more complex characters than in this one. People should do a background search before they attempt to make a movie staring one of the most exploited concepts ever.

The Prophecy: Uprising (2005 Video)

most original storyline I've seen in years

[9/10 · 23 June 2005]

The action of the movie takes place in Romania (my country) and I can say that unlike other movies in which Romania is the base ground this one offers a very realistic view of the country. I was especially pleased to hear the excellent accent the actors have sometimes, which is a very hard thing to do, I've never seen an English man speak romanian like a real one. The characters in this movie are the most original ones I've seen in years. They're just like the characters in video games, you must think like that character to understand him and his actions. I give this movie a 9 because it's an original movie with an original storyline, although the movie could have been done a lot better. In our days it's very hard to come up with an original idea for a story, lots of movies have a common structure which make them box office hits (special effects, famous actors, nude scenes, etc) but at one point you get tired to watch the same thing over and over again. I hope that in the future will have more movies of this kind.

Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith (2005)

Objective Overview

[3/10 · 28 May 2005]

I'm not a SW fan but I really enjoined episodes IV, V and VI mostly because the idea of the movie was so original. Episodes I and II, if you ask me, were ones of the worst disappointments ever, the story was bad, the acting was bad, the only thing that made the movies worth it were the special effects. You'll probably think that I'm going to say that episode III was the best one yet, well.... think again. It wasn't. I started watching the movie with a big YAWN, if you think that a couple of ships and lasers make a movie these days you probably have no idea what good movies are all about. Sure the special effects were great but it would have been more exciting if I haven't seen similar scenes all before. You see, I play a lot of video games and believe me when I say that Lucas should have been more careful with the battle scenes. If you have an extended knowledge of storyline you'll know that the episode III story has a smell of "deja vu" from a mile away. The reason Anakin turns to the Dark Side is very obvious thus you end watching the movie only for the special effects. As if thing couldn't get any worse the acting is very poorly made... the only one who made an effort in bringing the movie to life is Ewan McGregor, which did a hell of a job in his role. I never realized how "wise" was Yoda until this movie, I mean he never says anything that would help the heroes, he only says things that anybody, and I mean anybody, already know about.