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Reviews
Constantine (2005)
Ignore the overly-sensitive critics...
Chances are they are die-hard fans of the Hellblazer comics/graphic novels. Chances are you've never even heard of Hellblazer. Even less likely is the chance that you've ever even seen one and/or are familiar with the story and its main character, John Constantine.
This is an entertaining movie. It's a very cool story done very well -- regardless of what Hellblazer fans say. I don't care if the movie is true to the comic and I don't care if Keanu Reeves plays the role of Constantine accurately -- and neither should you.
Reeves isn't Russell Crowe or Geoffrey Rush. He doesn't have to be -- especially in a movie like this. Much like his work as Neo, he does enough with John Constantine to give the average movie-goer an enjoyable experience. This movie was a pleasant surprise and much better than I thought it would be -- considering the many critics. 8/10
Cinderella Man (2005)
Ignore the critics.
Those who criticize Cinderella Man are the same who criticize Finding Neverland. They have the same, tired argument: Cinderella Man doesn't represent the truth; Finding Neverland doesn't represent the truth! What these people don't quite seem to grasp is that neither of these movies (make that NO movie) owes us the complete truth. Cinderella Man isn't a documentary. If Braddock needs to be made out as a bigger hero than he really was -- and if Baer needs to be made out as a bigger villain than he really was -- then so be it.
I didn't go to the theater to watch a 3 hour history lesson -- I went to be entertained. I went to be inspired. I went to be moved. I went to laugh. Cinderella Man succeeds in all these areas and more.
Although the fight scenes were the best I have ever seen, this isn't a boxing movie -- my wife loved it just as much as I did. This is a story of love, determination and will-power. This movie is an all-too-rare thing: a reason to go to the theater. 10/10!
Assault on Precinct 13 (2005)
Terrible. Awful. Pungent. Brutal. Horrid.
Take your pick. All accurately describe this waste of a film. I'll never get these 2 hours of my life back. No movie should ever make you feel that way. This one does.
It tries SO HARD to be cool, hip, trendy. In reality it's none of these. It's tired. It's old. It's unintentionally funny. It's moronic in every sense. It's dumbed-down to the lowest possible common denominator of the human species.
Can't come up with a witty line? Throw in a few profanities to liven up the script. Can't come up with a scene that will hold an audience's attention for more than 30 seconds? Shoot another person in the head or jab another person in the face with a pointy object -- and I'm a person who uses the "F word" on a daily basis and I like some good violence in a movie. But not in this one.
Laurence Fishburne shows his versatility again -- this time by playing a quiet, subtle guy who you aren't quite sure about and who likes to use looks instead of words to make his point. Oh...wait. I kept waiting for him to look at Ethan Hawke and say: "Stop trying to hit me and HIT ME!"
And can anyone tell me what the point of Drea de Matteo's character "Iris Ferry" is? I can't, you can't, and neither can the director.
Don't waste your money on this garbage. If I could give it 0/10 I would.
The Hi-Lo Country (1998)
A very under-appreciated movie...
How does an entertaining film like this get overlooked and undervalued? Woody Harrelson was born to play "Big Boy" and Billy Crudup does a fine job playing his sidekick. Patricia Arquette gets a little annoying about halfway through the film, but we've learned to expect that from her so that shouldn't come as a surprise.
The friction created throughout this film keeps the interest level up and makes for a lot of fun, especially when things really start heating up; Harrelson becomes more and more volatile while Crudup becomes more and more worried about Big Boy's safety, all the while dealing with the animosity and jealousy he feels towards his best friend.
It all adds up to a story that keeps you guessing as to how it will finalize. The ending won't surprise anyone, but it still feels right, even if it isn't exactly what we may have wanted. Good movies do that instead of giving us what we want, they give us a better and more fitting ending.
Sure, 'The Hi-Lo Country' isn't the best western ever made, but it certainly isn't the worst. It's definitely one of the more entertaining.
Finding Neverland (2004)
Beyond brilliant, this movie is inspiring.
There was a time when I had lost all hope and faith in Hollywood's ability and willingness to create film as art as opposed to film as pure revenue creators. This movie has reformed me.
The way I view films relies almost singularly on one set of criteria: where are the flaws, how many are there, and can they be forgiven/overlooked? Finding Neverland destroyed my method beyond all repair. It was a bit like inserting a metal rod into a wood chipper.
Where are the flaws? What flaws? How many are there? There are none to be found. Can they be forgiven? The only thing this movie owes us is that it didn't go on for another 30 minutes.
So enveloped in this story was I that I could have spent the night in the theater hanging on to every word of a 12 hour movie. I did not want this movie to end because it was too perfect. It's like being a millionaire for only 2 glorious hours only to be forced back into our sad, wretched lives.
You owe it to your children (I would suggest ages 8+ because some scenes are just too powerful for young minds) to take them to see this movie. Heck, you owe it to yourselves. I defy you to endure the entirety of this movie with dry eyes. I defy you to walk out of the theater without a knot in your stomach or a lump in your throat. Lastly, I defy you to watch this movie and not conclude that Johnny Depp is the greatest actor of this generation. Beyond brilliant, this movie is inspiring. 10/10