ajp2012 Reviews

The Last of Us (2023– )

Way overrated. Absolutely nothing special.

[6/10 · 4 February 2023]

The amount of reviews here saying "it's the best thing I've ever seen" is absolutely hilarious and after the pilot episode everyone decided it was worthy of a 10/10 rating, which it is definately not. Don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with it as such, other than Ellie being probably one of the most irritating child characters ive seen, but there is nothing at all about the first 3 episodes that particularly stands out. Everything I've seen so far is just average and generic for this type of plot. We've seen it all before, which I have nothing against, but it is no where near as good as people are making out.

I don't even understand what the point of episode 3 was. A full episode about a gay couple who had almost nothing to do with the main story itself, other than the fact they had a weapon stash. It was a completely unnecessary episode in my opinion.

Apart from that I don't really have any complaints, but certainly nothing worthy of praising either. 6/10.

Queen of the South: El Final (2021) Season 5, Episode 10

Fantastic Series Finale

[10/10 · 12 March 2022]

I didn't even know season 5 was coming until I saw the new episodes advertised on Netflix. So off course I had no option but to binge all 10 episodes over a couple of days. Over all it has been a great series but I'm assuming there will be no season 6. Afew people have criticised the finale as being predictable and in all honesty, it was, but that was completely OK by me. After all, most of us enjoy a happy ending. :)

The Adam Project (2022)

Don't listen to the wannabe critics.

[8/10 · 12 March 2022]

Great fun sci-fi family movie. If you are a normal human being like myself then I'm sure you and your kids will love this.

Unfortunately the user reviews are riddled with self proclaimed wannabe critics whose only intentions are to slate this movie by pointing out everything that the average person really doesnt care in the slightest about. I'm convinced most never even watched the entire movie either.

Gold (I) (2022)

What did I just watch?

[3/10 · 25 January 2022]

In a nutshell, unknown man #1, in an unknown country, at an unknown time, working for an unknown company, heading to an unknown location, for an unknown reason, is picked up by unknown man #2 , then break down in an unknown barron/desert/outback land. Man #1 finds a gold nugget which is bigger than first appears, tries to move it, can't, deliberates with man #2. Man #2 goes on a 4 day journey to pick up an excavator, meanwhile man #1 "protects" the gold, fights off wild dogs, a crazy woman, kills the crazy woman, buries the crazy woman, digs up the crazy woman, moves the crazy woman, burns the crazy woman, buries the crazy woman, survives a sandstorm, gets impaled with a stick, meets crazy woman #2 (crazy woman #1's sister), gets rid of crazy woman #2, gets eaten by dogs. Man #2 returns, waits till man #1 is dead, tries to take gold for himself, gets killed by an arrow from unknown person. (crazy woman #2 most likely) The End.

THAT IS LITERALLY IT!

This is by far, the most boring film I have ever watched in my entire life. It was painful to endure, and I only watched it until the end because the outcome of the gold was what kept me somewhat interested. I suspect Zac Efron was only cast in order to hook people in, and no doubt cost 75% of the budget. But in reality they could have cast any B or C list Actor, or indeed a completely unknown person, and still would have given the film the exact same boring result. Its really not a good film in my opinion. Highly non - recommended. 3/10.

Norbit (2007)

Not Great But Still Pretty Funny

[7/10 · 22 December 2021]

There's nothing more satisfying than reading reviews from the Snowflake and PC society, getting all offended on behalf of other people, who feel the need to conform to these so called modern social standards, where no one is allowed to laugh, joke, poke fun or stero type any race, religion, sexuality etc etc etc. Whereas Family Guy which is 100 x more offensive, racist, crude retains a respectable high score of 8.1/10.

Is it really racist that Eddie Murphy impersonated a Chinese man for the sake of a movie part? Yet Cary Ewles just impersonated a Scottish character in a recent Christmas film, putting on the most godawful Scottish accent you have ever heard. Groundskeeper Willie from the Simpsons is literally the stereo type of a Scottish man but as a Scot myself was I offended by either portrayal? Absolutely not, because there is literally nothing to be offended by, and I certainly don't "choose" to be offended just because the rest of society is telling me I should.

Norbit is by no way as bad as the score indicates. I've read people say, vulgar, crude, disgusting, racist, gross, unpleasant etc etc which is a load of b*****ks. The type of humour might not be to everyone's liking which applies to any type of comedy, but it certainly doesn't make it a bad film. As Ricky Gervais once said, "just because you are offended, doesn't mean you are right".

Norbit has some has some very very funny parts which makes it a worthwhile watch, even if the plot is lacking. It is definitely not a "brilliant" film by any means but is certainly deserving of a 6-7/10 score.

Titanic (2012)

Pleasantly Surprised

[7/10 · 27 November 2021]

Most people are going to look at this film in one of two ways. The first type are going to criticise everything about it, such as the obviously fake accents, the cheesiness, the predictability, the un-originality, the script, the acting, and anything else they can use to tear it to shreds. The second type such as myself, who have the ability to overlook such apparent flaws, will take it for what it is, and actually get the enjoyment out of it that was intended. In all honesty I didn't really notice many of the above other than the accents, but as a Scottish guy myself, I found it more entertaining rather than insulting. I'm merely just going by what other people have written in other reviews.

As for the film itself, I thought it was actually very good indeed. I enjoyed it more than "A boy called Christmas" which I watched yesterday and could not get into at all. This in my opinion was much better and more enjoyable. It uses more or less the same formula as any romantic writing hence why I said predictable, but that really doesn't bother me, as it seems to work. It is clearly at the low-to-mid range of the budget spectrum, meaning there's no A list cast (except Drew Barrymores cameo role), or no fancy cgi, but a film like this needs nothing like that. In some weird way it reminded me of a cross between Monarch of the Glen and The Holiday. There was some very beautiful scenery through out the whole film and the convincing snow coupled with the christmas decorations really set the atmosphere for the festive period. Over all, I thoroughly enjoyed it and would certainly recommend it.

Red Notice (2021)

Below Average Sorry

[4/10 · 15 November 2021]

Like many other people, I am a huge fan of Ryan Reynolds, and almost anything he touches is usually really good. As for the Rock, I can take or leave him in all honesty.

This is probably the first time I have struggled to watch anything from RR.

It was like a cross between White Collar, National Treasure, Indiana Jones & James Bond with the attempted humour of Deadpool (but just not upto par). Then to top that off, the far fetched-ness of the Fast and Furious franchise, with at least 10 different twists and turns through out the whole movie. For me personally it was a complete mess, and didn't gel together at all like it should have.

The humour alone just felt too forced and try hard, and just became irritating rather than entertaining or even funny after a while. That coupled with the fact that RR and DJ argued like little children through out the whole movie, just made it less than enjoyable. And Ed Sheeran at the end???? It was just bizarre.

I'm sorry to say, but they could have done way better, especially with the script. Didn't work for me. Very average imo.

Far Cry 6 (2021 Video Game)

Exceeded My Expectations

[9/10 · 11 October 2021]

Far Cry 5 was my introduction to the series when it became one of the free monthly downloads last year. I wasn't overly keen on the story but loved the open world setting and the gameplay itself. That is what got me excited for the latest release, and I have looked forward to it all year.

Well I can say that it certainly is not a disappointment. Firstly, the scenery is absolutely beautiful, and has been intricately detailed, so even when you are in the back of beyond, there is always something to see or do, or a cave to explore, or wildlife to hunt, or do as I do, which is just to explore and observe the breathtaking views. Although the map is huge, every area has some kind of landmark, whether it be part of the story, or just there to explore, and does not have that empty dead space of huge maps, such as the Just Cause franchise. There has clearly been alot of effort put into the design and layout.

Secondly, there are loads of weapons to choose, all individually upgradable by collecting scrap items, scattered around the map, as well as unlocking unique weapons in hidden chests. Although the upgrades don't seem as in depth as other specific first person shooting games, there is still plenty to keep the majority of players happy, not to mention the ridiculous and crazy guns you wouldn't see in any other game anyways.

The vehicle choice is adequate with the usual planes, helicopters, boats, cars, trucks in previous games, but I feel they easily could have added alot more choice for a game of this size. It was nice to see the mini hovercraft, and strangely enough, horses too.

As for the story, it is very long. I'm around 30 hours in and I couldn't even tell you if I'm half way through or not. But I love it so far. There are numerous characters you cross paths with, some likeable, some not so much, but they are all part of the exciting journey. There are some very nice and unique missions throughout the whole game and what I personally enjoy the most, are the ones where you have to think strategically. You cannot go in all guns blazing in every mission because you will literally die every 2 minutes. As the story progresses and enemy soldiers become harder to kill, you are almost forced to take a stealthy approach. Some players may not like that, but I really do, and I'm sure others will too. Having the ability to play co op with a friend will make a huge difference in how you handle missions, as well as being generally more fun. I have only played solo so far but had great times with friends in FC5.

There is so much good to say about this game and I can't praise it enough. I would score it 10 but unfortunately it's not a perfect game for me. As good as I think it is, there are some things that prevent it from a perfect 10.

The radio stations for starters are diabolical. I think there's only 3 songs that I recognise and I do love listening to good music in games.

Vehicle choice as I said earlier. The white player blip/arrow on the radar is horrible, as it merges with other white icons making it a nightmare to see where you are. The game freezes intermittently for 10-15 seconds, launching your car in the air. (Could be an old gen issue). The enemy is very over powered, constantly hitting you before you can even see them. They run whilst fully locking on and shooting, randomly throw a grenade whilst shooting and you are getting hit left right and centre. It can be very frustrating, especially when you have an objective to carry out whilst fighting off endless enemies, reloading, healing, dying and restarting all over again. And the enemy spawns aren't the greatest. There is definitely room for improvement but over all I have been very impressed. I'm very excited to see how the story ends and then work through the side missions and treasure hunts. Last thing is, there are alot of haters out there putting this game down for no good reason, so if you want an honest opinion, go to a small online streamer. Those guys will tell you exactly what this game is like.

Free Guy (2021)

Gamers will love this.

[9/10 · 25 September 2021]

As you can see, there are some dismal "1/10" ratings from individuals who most likely have nothing to do with the gaming community, or just determined to slate this movie because it has similarities to The Trueman Show, The Matrix, Groundhog Day and Ready Player One.

I really pity those people who refused to see the entertainment value and instead focus on the irrelevant aspects that most people couldn't care less about.

For me personally as an "80s to present" gamer, and youtube streamer, I found this movie absolutely fantastic, capturing many elements of modern open world games and the gaming community itself. There are many things that modern gamers will find relatable, and for me personally was when they mentioned that they never knew a particular part of the city existed. I think we have all experienced someone say that at some point. I also really liked seeing a player "tea bagging" a dead victim which I only experienced myself recently whilst playing Battlefield 5.

As for the cast and script, Ryan Reynolds was absolutely the right person for the lead character, with some hints of Deadpool humour too. Just typical Ryan Reynolds humour in all honesty. The script was actually very good, in keeping with what the movie wanted to achieve. Blue shirt guy was always supposed to be a relatively simple and straight forward person, who showed elements of "noob" talk when he discovered new things. Again all relatable.

It is a great film, however the self proclaimed wannabe movie critics will be out in force to bring the score down. This is a 7-8/10 movie all day long so don't be fooled by those reviews. Most notable, rating a movie 1/10 then proceeding to state they turned it off after 15 minutes. ? Really?

Anyways Enjoy. :)

The Ice Road (2021)

Is Liam Neeson Desperate For Work?

[2/10 · 19 July 2021]

This movie had potential, a decent cast and a fairly original plot for a movie, although Ice Road Trucker fans may disagree. Those are literally the only positive comments I can make. The most obvious fails were the awful cgi, script and most unlikeable characters I have seen in a long time. There was clearly a tiny budget which showed throughout the whole movie. That's not always a bad thing, but in this case, resulted in a barely watchable shambles. For me personally the worst thing was the cgi trucks being completely different from the in-movie trucks, clearly indicating that whomever created this trash didn't really care, and it's actually kind of insulting to the viewers "assuming" we wouldn't notice. I just feel bad for Liam Neeson for accepting such a terrible role. There was once a time where you knew a movie was going to be great if he was lead actor, but seems like his career is going in the same direction as Bruce Willis and Nicholas Cage. Not really much more to say about the movie itself other than it is complete garbage. I only gave it 3 and not 2 stars, merely to give some credit to actors, for being handed a terrible script. There are clearly people upping the score as it was at 2.7/10 last week and has jumped to 5.5/10. It is truly horrendous movie not worth anyones time. Now I think about it 2/10 is all it deserves.

The Tomorrow War (2021)

Jurassic World with Aliens

[8/10 · 8 July 2021]

Firstly, discard any reviews rating this movie 5/10 or below, as they were written by wannabe critics, self appointed movie know-it-alls and those individuals who care about character development, originality or just like to pick holes in the plot.

I am just a normal, run of the mill guy who enjoys all genres of movies and rate them for what they are, and have no reason to leave undeserved negative comments or reviews.

This movie is fantastic in all aspects. Chris Pratt is the perfect lead character, very reminiscent of his role in Jurassic Park. The cgi was on point, the script is great, having those one liners and humorous moments we all love. The action sequences were exactly what you would expect from a $200 million budget, yet were not over the top or far fetched like some other recent action movies. (*cough* Fast and Furious *cough*)

The basic plot is that a war breaks out in the near future where aliens wipe out most of the human population. People from present day are recruited to travel to the future to fight in this war. Chris Pratt leads a small team tasked with recovering a research team but things soon change when they realise what they are up against and the movie basically develops from there.

I would highly recommend it unless you are any of the above individuals I mentioned.

Definitely a well deserved 8/10 from me. :)

The Christmas Chronicles: Part Two (2020)

Terrible, Terrible, Terrible unless your 5 years old.

[3/10 · 26 November 2020]

So I watched the first Christmas Chronicles a few weeks ago and I actually really enjoyed it. It was a decent film with the original Santa Clause Movie (Tim Allen) vibes, so naturally I was looking forward to the sequel. How WRONG could I be. The only plus sides to this, is the fact Goldie Hawn plays a larger part than the first. So where do I even begin to describe this mess? Firstly I feel that they expanded the target audience to include 3 year olds and pre school children. This becomes a massive problem when things become ridiculously stupid within the movie and people with half a brain don't really see the entertainment value or logic. The acting is also debatable right from the start. The young boy, I don't feel was ready to start acting in a big film role and the girls was questionable too in some parts. Who ever decided on a sequel completely rushed the job, and who ever gave the script the OK should be sacked. The cgi was also 5/10 at best. The plot was nothing unseen before, but the execution was absolutely shocking. I literally don't want to spend any more time writing, as I've just wasted 2 hours already. They could have done SO MUCH BETTER. Major disappointment for me, I'm sorry to say.

Mafia: Definitive Edition (2020 Video Game)

Simply WOW

[10/10 · 25 September 2020]

Not the best graphics, not the best music....but for an almost 20 year old game - remake/ remaster.....OMFG they have 180% delivered. I mean I had the original in my younger days and I never really appreciated the story within the game at that time, but playing today for 8 hours solid, I realised that this is an absolute brilliant story/game. Everything is overly dramatic giving an almost movie like experience. I cannot criticise anything within the gameplay itself. This game goes way beyond my expectations and I'm so buzzed to play the Mafia 2 definitive edition after this! Absolutely well done for making the perfect remaster.

Into the Night (II) (2020–2021)

Wannabe Critics dont bother. For the other 99.9% of the population its GOOD

[9/10 · 3 May 2020]

Clearly there are two types of people giving these ratings. The ones who over analyise every single thing and want to point out every hole in the plot, or people like myself who just want to watch something entertaining. I came across this simply because Netflix emailed me a notification that it was added so thought I would give it ago. I binged all 6 episodes in one evening and to be honest I really enjoyed it for what it was. Was it believable? Hell no! But do I care? Not at all. It kept me gripped through every episode and I didnt get too caught up in how far fetched it was, the plot holes, the science or whether the story or the characters were believable or not. I really enjoyed it and whilst it may not win any Oscar's, I do hope there is going to be a Season 2.

Age of Ice (2014 Video)

Avoid Avoid Avoid

[1/10 · 30 January 2015]

Everything about this film is just SO BAD!! The special effects, acting, storyline, script, music and even the editing were terrible. If you can make it through the whole film, you will want those 85 minutes of your life back, I guarantee! I'm not one for slating films and think many are given bad reviews for the wrong reasons, but this one truly deserves to be in the top 10, worst films of all time. I must of said to myself "Really??", on at least 10 occasions during the film, due to the stupidly, unrealistic scenarios and scenes. The acting was horrendous by most of the cast, which was not helped by the equally horrendous script they were given. I really don't want to waste any more time repeating what others have already mentioned, and I am cautious that I am approaching 100 minutes of my life I wont get back. I would finally like to stress the fact that this particular film has been accurately given a score of 1.8/10 all though I still feel that is too generous. You really don't want to be.... I Told You So'd!!

Lifted (2010)

Excellent film. Understated!!

[9/10 · 4 June 2013]

I came across this film purely by accident but glad I did! Although its on the lower end of the budget scale compared to other big movies, it has a great story line and the cast act their parts flawlessly. I rated it 9/10, as it is one of the very few films ever that have made me shed a tear. The last half hour especially is very emotional and I agree that it is one of the best film endings I have seen. The combination of...a father fighting in Afghanistan, a mother who is rehabilitating from drug abuse and a young boy who wants to live his dream by singing, really makes an excellent storyline and great film to watch. Although its maybe not everyones cup of tea, I would highly recommend it. The free- styling is amazing and the boy singing is pretty awesome as well. If you like a good weep then get your hankies out!! 9/10 :)