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The Lord of the Rings: The Rings of Power (2022)
So far... so good.
To be honest, I hadn't had much interest in watching this when I first heard about it. I'm a aficionado of the books, Jackson's films and even Ralph Bakshi's animated version and I'm a fan of fantasy in general. This to me sounded like it was going to be a cynical cash-in on an established series. Why go back to Middle-Earth when there are so many other books out there ripe for adaptation?
Not only that, but it was going to be based on The Silmarillion and the appendixes of The Lord of The Rings. There's a reason those are not written in the same way as the main bodies of text (that is to say, they are written more like old historical accounts, without character building or other more tactile nuance) and that is because they are not "story" but "backstory".
However, upon watching these first two episodes I found myself gripped. True, it is a little shaky, when compared to the films, but the special effects, pacing, characters and acting have so far been solid. I for one am intrigued as to where the series will go.
The Ghosts of Borley Rectory (2021)
An Amateurish Mess.
The story of Borely Rectory is one of the most fascinating in British paranormal history. Whether you believe in the supernatural or not, the legends and folklore, as well as the story about the real investigation are intriguing.
However, what we have here is really sub-par.
I called it "amateurish", but I've seen better amateur ghost stories on YouTube.
The editing and pacing are all over the place, the special effects are basic (think one step up from those face-filters you can get on your phone) It's badly shot, badly framed and tries to pull every horror film cliche in the book- ineffective jump scares, constant fake-outs, cheap gore.
Not worth it even as a curiosity.
Alien³ (1992)
Not to be watched in succession with Aliens
On its own merits, Alien 3 is a fairly good film, albeit unrelentingly grim. However, when watched following Aliens I feel it crosses the line into being mean-spirited.
Not only are Newt and Hicks quickly dispatched off-screen during the opening credits, it undoes Ripley's journey in the proceeding film.
The Ridiculous 6 (2015)
Plodding
This isn't the worst movie ever, there are a few chuckles, the scenery is nice and it's well shot, but it's dull and plodding.
Dinosaur Chronicles (2004)
Not even "ironically" fun.
Some films you can enjoy ironically, even though they're bad. Even such legendarily bad films as 'Troll 2' and 'Birdemic' have a certain appeal.
Imagine if your ten year old nephew made a dinosaur movie- He and his friends got a video camera and ran around with dinosaur puppets and models and rubber masks. But these are not kids, these are grown men.
Don't Watch This: CTRL+ALT+DEL (2018)
Reminiscent of the 90's
This seemed like a callback to how 90's TV writers viewed the then new tech of VR, with every old cliche (such as "If you die in Virtual Reality, you die in real life") thrown in.
The Misty Green Sky (2016)
Padded
Looking past the cheap CGI, There is about twenty minutes of actually rather good story in here, but a lot of sub-plots that go nowhere. scenes that just go on and vignettes that don't really serve the story (including a bit of gratuitous fan-service), all padding out the run-time.
Were this a 15 to 25 minute short, it may have been worth watching, but even with state-off-the-art production values, I think I still would be bored with all the extraneous stuff.
The Punisher (2017)
Welcome back, Frank.
I had reservations when I heard that they were going to do a series of The Punisher. In my opinion, he can be a pretty one-note character:- Find the bad guys, kill them in a variety of gruesome ways, and repeat. Not only that, but I find he works best when he guest-stars in another characters comic or TV show, either to have is askew morality and brutal methods go against those of heroes like Spider-man, Captain America or, as was the case with the Netflix series in which this incarnation of Frank Castle debuted, Daredevil. Otherwise, just for the effect of "OMG, The Punisher's turned up! It's just got real!" Not only that, but after recent events, how well would I warm to a series that could potentially glorify gun violence.
However, I was pleasantly surprised by Netflix's The Punisher. This incarnation gave us a version of the character that was nuanced, without feeling the character had been (too) diluted.
The story also deals with the political questions that may be raised by such a character and doesn't shy away from the issue, but at the same time doesn't offer simple moral solutions or preaching.
Some fans may be unhappy that every episode isn't just Frank killing bad guys in inventive ways. I'm of the opinion that less is more and when the violence does come into play it's all the more effective because of it.
Thor: Ragnarok (2017)
Lots of Fun, but needs a little bit more soul.
I found this film highly enjoyable, the best of the three Thor films, a perfect mix of action, spectacle and humour. However, there are events in this film that should have had more of an emotional resonance, but are quickly forgotten to get onto the next gag or set-piece.
I think the best analogy would be the Guardians of The Galaxy movies- they managed to make me laugh, wow me and had me sobbing into my popcorn.
Once again, this IS a really good film. If is had a little emotional weight to it, it might have been a GREAT film.
Journey to the Center of the Earth (1988)
An in-cohesive, incoherent mess of a film.
From an early age I've loved films based on Jules Verne's "Journey To The Centre of Earth", Edgar Rice Burroughs' "At The Earth's Core", Arthur Conan Doyle's "The Lost World" and countless other tales of hidden realms populated by strange civilisations, weird creatures or dinosaurs, no matter how loosely they followed the original, how many liberties they took with it or how much they "borrowed" from each other. I'm also a fan of cheesy 80's fantasy, so generally I can be forgiving towards wobbly special effects, but even I must draw the line somewhere! My main problem with this isn't the terrible acting or the dodgy special effects (anyone waiting for stop-motion dinosaurs, please move along. There's some men-in-suit monsters, I'll get to those in a sec) but with they fact that this "story" has no structure to it whatsoever. Characters that start of being the main protagonists end up being side-lined or even just forgotten (I would imagine they couldn't afford the actors after filming started and they just walked off set), plot lines are set up then are not resolved and it literally ends with "And then someone just does something and makes everything OK- THE END!". Halfway through the film the characters have dream sequences, one of which shows the protagonists shooting up through a tunnel in a large stone bowl, reminiscent of the ending of the Disney film of the same name, another shows one of the heroes rescuing the others and a character that is yet to be introduced played by Emo Philips (who's name receives top billing) from large, shambling monsters. Later in the film Emo Philips does indeed turn up, albeit in a different costume and wig to that he had in the dream and you go "Aha! The characters were somehow predicting their own future!" but that isn't the case! Philips character is just another "wacky" minion who doesn't effect the story whatsoever!
If films were cars you'd have some that were finely crafted Rolls Royces, some that were sturdy, reliable functional trucks and others that may be cheap and badly made or old and rusted and falling apart. Journey To The Center of the Earth isn't even one of these, it's just some assorted junk that someone has assembled in the shape of a car. Seriously, this film should never had been released.
Rogue One (2016)
Damn near perfect.
I would find it difficult to discuss a problem I have with this film without spoiling a surprise. I'll try not to be too specific as to what happens, but please pay due attention to my SPOILER WARNING. I shall mark the paragraphs that may contain spoilers with an (SW)
(SW) A rather minor bug-bear I have with this is that I cannot get around the fact that one of the characters is a CGI construct. Now, we may have seen CGI characters before, such as Jar-Jar Binks in the prequels, Gollum in the Lord of the Rings, The Hulk in the Marvel movies and countless others, acting alongside real people, and have had "digital stuntmen" in which an actor has been augmented or even replaced by a computer graphics. However, characters like Jar-Jar, Gollum and the Hulk are not human, and digital stuntmen are usually on the screen for mere moments, lost in a blur of movement. Rogue One has a character that is portrayed by a CGI construct, modeled in the likeness of an actual human being, an actual person, acting opposite and interacting with real actors. It's very well done, but there's no way getting around the fact that this is a CGI construct and it took me out of it.
That point aside, this is an excellent film and worthy addition to the Star Wars world. Even though I enjoyed 'The Force Awakens' I had to concede with the criticism some had that it echoed the events of 'A New Hope' rather closely. Rogue One, although dovetails neatly into the existing films is very much it's own animal.