paultjiam Reviews

Haze (2005)

Saw vs Cube

[10/10 · 6 June 2006]

This Japanese low budget horror movie is a true piece of postmodern eclectic movie-making. Instead of using Japanese movies as a source of inspiration (Like: the Ring, Grudge, Kill Bill), this movie consists of American horror movies. The movie starts with a scene of a wounded man who found himself in a very small place (ref. Cube). Soon this man finds out he's trapped in a maze and 'may be' used as a victim in a game of rich freaks (ref. Saw, My little eye). After this short introduction, the pain begins. If you have ever seen American History X (and you probably have), then the scene with the black man biting in the pavement, while Edward Norton kicks him to death, will still be in your memories. You can expect something like this, only ten times worse. Eventually he meets a woman and with her, he tries to find his way out. It won't take much of your time, since the duration of this movie is only 50 minutes, so you should watch it. If it is only for the homage (did the director ever seen that movie?) to American History X. A nice short horror masterpiece.

Your Heart in My Head (2005)

pretty sick

[7/10 · 5 February 2006]

When people think of German cinema, they think of Lola Rennt, Das experiment, the Edukators, etc. Intens movies with heavy music, fast montage and young actors. Dein Herz in meinem Hirn is totally different. Only two actors are in this movie: two male adults who, besides their own role as depressive males with sick ideas also play the mother of one of the lead character, the ex-wife and a female friend of the mother. The movie is shot in TV-documentary-style. That makes the whole movie looks quite realistic. The story is based on a real event, which was widely spread in the European media two years ago. A man asked another man to kill and eat him. And that's what also happened in this movie. Some scenes are disgusting, but the first part of the movie shows the audience two pity full men. Two men who are desperately lonely and longing for attention and compassion. They don't have a job, a wife or friends. The ultimate cry for attention and to give their life a meaning is to be eaten by the other. So that the two are always together and are brave enough to face the world. If you are a non-vegetarian and not in a depressed mood, you should watch this movie. It is interesting, not entertaining. I've warned you.

The Protector (2005)

the perfect version of Ong Bak

[10/10 · 24 January 2006]

After seeing Ong Bak, Tom Yum Goong doesn't look like a sequel, but like an ultimate version of the instant classic Ong Bak. If Tony Jaa lived in the 70s, Bruce Lee wouldn't exist at all. I didn't get the story of this movie, because I saw it in Thai. I even recommend everyone to see this movie without subtitles, because the (probably) poor story would have a negative effect on your judgment, just like Ong Bak. There is only one thing why every action-lover should watch this though: the fight-scenes. Without invisible ropes (matrix/crouching tiger) or fake fights (rocky, or every American action movie), Tony Jaa beats everyone up. He breaks about 50 arms and legs in one action scene, with the terrible sounds of cracking bones, this scene really thrills. But the best and visually most beautiful fight scene is against the Capoeira-man. Two martial-arts styles fight against each other in a room filled with fire and water. Totally amazing. Order this movie from ebay, it is really worth your money, I guarantee. If you liked Ong Bak, then Tom Yum Goong is more than twice as good. Tony Jaa makes the impossible possible. See it!

Son of the Mask (2005)

I almost committed suicide after watching this movie

[1/10 · 24 August 2005]

This is a story of an unfortunately guy who sat in an airplane on his way to Bangkok when he was suddenly forced to do the worst thing in his whole life: to watch Son of the Mask. It was on a huge screen in front of me, and because I wasn't tired, I had to watch it. I hated the Mask, so I didn't expect anything. But then it began.. the horror.. the worst 90 minutes in my entire life went by so g0ddamn slowly. I felt pain all over my body by every minute I watched. I tried to look a away, but I couldn't. I felt like Alex de Large watching Hitler movies with Beethoven music in A Clockwork Orange. I was conditioned by this movie. At that time I really hoped the airplane had to make an emergency landing or what so ever. But here I am. Still alive, and I feel guilty for myself that I have seen this , I will take these bad memories into my grave. Thanks to China Airlines. Well, after this, should I say something about the plot, the acting, the camera-work? The director, Lance Guterman should be banned for life, this movie must be destroyed immediately. And that's why I give it a 10. Because it must not get the cult status. It should be banned out of the "worst 100 IMDb list". If you read this, please help, give it a 10!

De dominee (2004)

One of the worst Dutch action movies

[1/10 · 16 August 2005]

After some quite OK Dutch action flicks, like Lek and Van God Los, Gerrard Verhage wants to make a movie about the life of a Dutch mobster. Well, mobster is a big word for Klaas Bruinsma. He isn't a real international big guy like George Jung (Blow) or Pablo Escobar. He is just an Amsterdam lowlife who made some money by selling soft-drugs. Things are often blown up in the Netherlands, and this movie is just an other example. But even then, the movie could be very nice if the story was okay told. Now there are major jumps in time: one day KLaas is just an ordinary drug-boy, the next shot he seems to be a big player in the drug-scene. Nobody knows how's that possible (except for those who read the book). The acting is really bad, the non-Dutch movie-watchers get to see one of the worst actresses in the Netherlands: Chantal Janzen. When you think she finally gets naked, then you are watching a stand in model. So: bad acting + bad montage + crap story = De Dominee.

Please don't watch it, even if other people say it's good, because it isn't. I've warned you.

3-Iron (2004)

the beauty of silence

[10/10 · 4 May 2005]

By far the best romantic movie of the year 2004. I guess everything is perfect in this movie. Every detail, every scene is done with perfect acting and camera-work. Even the music touched me, because of the many silent moments, the music and the natural sounds have more effect. The story is simple but superb, a young man breaks in empty houses to live there for a short while. He cleans their laundry, eats their food and sleeps in their bed. One day he finds a girl in a house which was supposed to be empty. She accompanies him while her (bad) husband seeks revenge. Unfortunate events happen, but without being too sentimental. The ending of this movie is heartbreaking. Do watch this movie with your most beloved one(s). This is Asian romantic at its best.

Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas (1998)

Probably the best movie of the 90's

[10/10 · 2 May 2005]

There are some movies you can only watch with your friends and lots of beer and pod. Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas is such a movie. But it is more than that. Even when you are not drunk or stoned you will love this unforgettable road trip Johnny Depp and Benicio del Toro are making through Las Vegas. Terry Gilliam (he deserves a statue in Hollywood for this film) made the most bizarre movie-scenes I have ever seen: the hotel-room aftermath, the circus-bar, the elevevatorscene. Nothing beats Fear and Loathing. Johnny Depp and Benicio del Toro play the best roles of their life's, the played it so well that at the end, you want to become them.. Call some friends, get some beer, smoke some pod and watch Fear and loathing, you won't regret, I promise!

Troy (2004)

Troy: Greek history for stupids

[1/10 · 24 April 2005]

Well, the title says it all. I can write it down quite easy. If you have any Greek historical background, you think this movie sucks. Because it is on big fat lie they are telling you. If you haven't got any Greek historical background, you think this movie sucks anyway. Because the way Wolfgang Petersen (Das Boot) makes this Hollywood-crap is unbelievable. The audience have seen enough mass-fights last decade. It is just simply not overwhelming anymore. And let that aspect just be the only one that's 'good' in this movie. The acting sucks badly. Orlando Bloom is totally annoying, Brad Pitt is a good-looking Hollywood-guy, but hell no, use him for a good purpose, not for Achilles. The audience (you) can't take Achilles seriously if he is Brad Pitt?! Always use more anonymous actors for this kind of movies (like Peter Jackson did with LOTR). I would advice anybody to see this movie, so you can see how Hollywood rapes our European history. And for God's sake, it's your own history too, America.