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jim26bass
I know the scientific names of beings animalculous.
I'm very well acquainted with matters mathematical,
I understand equations both simple and quadratical,
about binomial theorem - I am teeming with a lot of news...
With many cheerful facts about the square of the hypotenuse!
Reviews
Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban (2004)
Cuarón was just showing off...
Alfonso Cuarón claims that the film didn't need to be 3-4hrs long; well I have to admit he may be correct; the only problem is he forgot to explain what the hell was going on?
He said that a novel-to-screen adaptation is the Directors viewpoint on how to best tell the story. Well that's fine, but you still need to actually tell the story. Don't you? Not one person, who saw the film, without reading the books, understood what was going on half the time, and the few sub-plots he left in weren't explained in any way, shape or form that could be understood but an outside observer! So doesn't that contradict his whole Directors Viewpoint theory?
Cuarón was just showing off his excellent film making skills (No I'm not being sarcastic!) and decided to say F*#K YOU to all the Big Name Hollywood Directors by making a Art-House style Blockbuster, which would have been great, if he had bothered to pay attention to the actual story, instead of just concentrating on all the stupid things he chose to shoot instead!
Don't get me wrong they were amazing, but so much time consuming crap was put into the film, that could have been spent on, you know, Harry Potter instead of showing off to the world that he's an excellent director... WE KNOW YOU ARE MATE! YOU WOULDN'T HAVE BEEN HIRED FOR THE JOB IF YOU WERN'T...
He made some excellent & much needed changes to the films, and we all must be grateful for that, but by trying to make a more intelligent film, (Which he did) he robbed us of many wonderful aspect of the Harry Potter world! Things we were all looking forward to being brought to life on the big screen...
And as if that wasn't bad enough, he convinced Mike Newell to make GOF (Which is the same size as books 1, 2 & 3, combined) into a 2 1/2 hour movie!?!
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE don't let him near another Harry Potter film ever again!
Dracula 3000 (2004)
Word's can't describe...
OK with Coolio in it I should have known better! But Noooooooo.
Within 3 mins you've encountered 5 bites from other movies & and TV shows...
8 mins Casper Van Dien should have learnt by now!
10 mins you're feeling sorry for Tom 'Tiny' Lister Jr. that he has been reduced to doing movies like this.
15 mins Erika Eleniak Shows up looking like Zena.
20 mins you're ready to shoot you're self...
How these movies receive funding is beyond me! And yes I watched the whole thing. The Ending is priceless!!! Just stay away!
Series 7: The Contenders (2001)
Rip-Off
I turned this off about 50 minutes into it! Whoever the moron was who decided to steal the idea of Koushun Takami's book(Battle Royal), & make it into a pathetic reality TV show scenario, deserves to be shot!
It has done the Film Industry a good turn though. Now Directors like William Malone(Fear Dot Com) can say "well at least it's better than Series 7" This piece of crap & Dracula 3000 tie for first place in the worst 100 movies ever made!
Be warned this is not a 'So bad it's Good'Flick!
This is a disgrace to Film Makers everywhere!
Never see this movie!
Under the Radar (2004)
Excellent but unoriginal...
It's a shame when Film Makers have to rip off other movies. Especially when the idea for their's is good enough, yes it's always going to be done, but most can pull it off without making it obvious... This film was great, I thoroughly enjoyed it, but with the Tarentino like soundtrack, to go with the pulp fiction style development of the plot, it just pi#%ed me off! If they had just re-scored the tracks it would have made all the difference. They also had a bit of bad luck with using the same amnesia problem that Drew Barrymore suffered from in '50 First Dates'. As that was released only months before, but it was just another factor grating at the unoriginality for the films overall structure. Other than that it was very entertaining & I do recommend you check it out. There are many great moments and I'm proud to admit it's an Australian made film.
Without a doubt a positive step forward for the Australian Film Industry.