The_Virtual_Tongue Reviews

The Horror of Dolores Roach (2023)

Binged Watched Episodes in So Far...

[5/10 · 8 July 2023]

If you've lived long enough you've seen this black comedy of sorts trope of people who are murdered and then 'disposed of' by being served up as food. The earliest of this sort that I can think of at this momement, being about a pint in worth of booze sipping on a july friday night out of sheer boredom, is the hilarious 1982's "Eating Raoul".

IOW, protagonists painted into a corner for whatever reasons, who are not necessarily evil, are forced to kill, and somehow have the circumstances available to rid the evidence (bodies) as food to be consumed.

Honestly I was going to trash this thing just a few minutes as as garbage, but something grabbed me, I know not what, so I kept going. So yeah I've seen this formula all before, but it did have just enough of a new take to keeo me interested... at least 5 outta 8 so far. Maybe it'll totally disappoint. Maybe it''ll finish satisfyingly in case no second season happens. ( I hope so... wish everything now was just a miniseries. Have no interest in long drawn out series ) anymore what can otherwise be done in a two hour movie or one eason mini series.

The Taking of Pelham One Two Three (1974)

Remembering late 60's/70's NYC of my youth

[5/10 · 21 December 2022]

Just watched this movie again probably since it first hit theaters. Main reason I did rewatch was to see the scene at Union Square Park. I remember watching them film that scene being I attended Stuyvesant HS and was hitting the subway there to go home. Also nostalgic was having the 200 Park Ave South building shown in the background, where little would I know, I'd be working in that building some 12 years later as a photographers assistant.

To the film.... yeah, it's dated... comically unrealistic characters and situations...gritty grimey look about it... as most NYC cops and robbers films of that era did. However, as long as you take that all in stride, it's an amusing fun film for what it's worth. Matthau's character does throw out some funny quips along the way.

One thing I was laughing at, was how when Garber (Matthau) would get some instructions from Mr Blue (Shaw), Garber then tells some lowly patrolman somewhere, probably the one stuck in the tunnel, to relay those instructions to everyone else. Yeah, I'll be sure to let the police chief, the sargeant hanging out at 28th street, and mayor know whats happening. Playing the game of telephone during a hostage crisis, lol.

So imo, for the general viewer give the movie a 4 or 5. If you grew up in 70's NYC, add a star or two.

Una Great Movie (2022)

Ugh

[3/10 · 25 November 2022]

I'm sorry. I'll give three stars for effort at least. As usual, the stupidlly high ratings are probably from production and lackeys. Of course if you're just the regular movie goer looking for something to watch, ymmv.. What follows is just my opinion.

I get indie filmmakers pour their hearts and souls into these things. Unlike a songwriter or painter who can produce art on their own for virtually zero expense after even the most minimal layout for gear and materials , making films requires huge amounts of cash, equipment and the reliance on many many others to make it happen. Yet after all that time, money and effort, chances are you've produced a stinker.

I was going to bail five minutes into this.... because that's all I've ever needed to size up film..... but gave it a chance though finally had to quit after about a half hour.

Problem with 98% indie produtions is that they reek of indie production. Big part of it is the awful, stiff, amteurish acting. Then there's that stinko script and directing. Even when photography itself is mechanically competent, the entire feel is off compared to the standard big name studio production. That's this that kind of movie.. Any discussion about the story itself is kind of pointless.

The Old Man (2022– )

He's Got Skills

[6/10 · 17 June 2022]

This based on the first two episodes so far. It was decent enough being carried by the acting, direction, photography. Where it's falling down for me is the same old alphabet agency spook tied up with some long time ago implausible alphabet agency foreign conflict rigmarole that now wants him dead but in the meantime this near mid 70's geezer manages to bed his newly acquainted 30 year his junior landlady who wanted to throw him out because no dogs allowed but after a scene where we catch a glimpse of her holding a FINAL NOTICE bill, you know she's desperate for money and him and his dogs are gonna be able to stay tropes, lol.

Flatbush Misdemeanors (2021–2022)

NYC Vibe

[9/10 · 17 June 2022]

Writing this as season 2 ep1 just came out. Really like this show. Similar to High Maintenance in that it blends what could be NYC real life people and situations. Only difference is HM will go towards the surrealistic at times. The humor in Flatbush comes from the absurdities of real life that when happening in the moment to people wouldn't necessarily seem funny, but looking on as viewers, are very comical. Then there's the characters.... Kareem (Dan's stepfather) and Dr Flowers (Dan's online therapist) are absolutely hilarious characters.

The Midwich Cuckoos (2022)

Mediocre waste of your time

[5/10 · 3 June 2022]

Just finished watching the whole shebang. Have no idea whether this was a one off series or expected to have more seasons. Gawd I hope not. Luckily this ended satisfyingly enough although a door is left open should another season gets greenlit. If so, won't bother watching.

Re-imagining classics for present times doesn't bother me and neither does diverse casting. All I care about is that a show is very well made.

Show was adequately engaging for the first four episodes but then I really started getting irritated by the idiocy displayed by some of the main characters and other assorted nonsensical plot behavior. The kind of thing where you want to be slapping some sense into characters.

But where it really went into high gear stupid was the last have of the final episode. I can see where some will think this show was really good but for me was jut so so.

Junji Itô: Korekushon (2018– )

Really Enjoyed This. Creepy & Bizarre.

[9/10 · 21 July 2021]

Don't read comics or manga. I do watch most shows/films that comes along (if gotten good reviews) that happen to be based on them however. Therefore, I generally know nothing about their 'canons' or 'universes' nor do I care whether those things are adhered to as uber fans seem to want. I simply watch and enjoy the shows strictly on their own merit.

I'm always on the lookout for any good horror anthologies be they live action or anime, so when this came along I grabbed it and binged.

While I hate dubbing of live action films, preferring subtitles, I don't mind it at all in anime. That said, I really enjoyed this series. I found much of it thoroughly strange, bizarre and horrifying. My cup of tea.

Particularly notable was the face of the episode about the model and film students. Absolutely horrific visage. One scene that grossed me out and was hard to watch was the one about oil. When the brother squeezed his face over his sister into just two eyeballs and zits, with streams of oil (pus?) raining down on her, it was very hard to watch.

Big thumbs up.

Hellier (2019)

Synchrohfercrikesakewhatdideyejustwatch??

[2/10 · 2 January 2020]

Go outside to some empty lot. Pick up a stone and give it a throw then go over to where it landed. OMG, look, there's some other rocks around here as well! Synchronicity!! That's the show..... well that along with some rather funny bits involving spirit boxes, tarot cards, tin cups, conjuring ceremonies. Best bit was the 'bleep, bloop, blorp' musical segment in a cave. Unfortunately they neglected to tell us, the audience, that they all had watch 'close encounters of the third kind' at the cabin the night before.

Good points about it is that it is filmed very nicely which made watching all 10 episodes easy on the eyes and brain. If you watch this not expecting anything to happen (it doesn't of course) but rather as sorta you being a silent fifth person tagging along with them and just enjoying listening to their storytellings, it'll suck you in.

I'm a believer and experienced events and have my own synchronicity things going on for decades already. There's no new ground being opened here but just next generations discovering this stuff for themselves and diving in. Thing is, these people have been led to believe they're on some special journey....being put on some ritualistic 'initiation' path. However, they're not. They're in a very line long of those sucked into the proverbial rabbit hole where there's no ending resolution or secrets to be revealed. More like how you have you cat keep chasing after a string actually, lol.

Beatriz at Dinner (2017)

Simplistic Tripe That Would Insult A 9 Year Old

[1/10 · 23 May 2018]

I agree with some of the other reviewers that found this awful. However, I will add that reviewers that use a movie to take a swipe at whatever their opposing political views are, are as idiotic as this movie was. If you want to see a good offbeat film about a ticking time bomb of a dinner guest waiting to go off, maybe try "Krisha". Back to "Beatrice". Paper thin stereotypes of wealthy people who got wealthy by raping and pillaging the land and a very superficial 'new age' type personality (Hayek) who apparently, despite her age of aquarius loving nature, does not apparently know how to comport herself as an invited dinner guest. Even if some of those guests don't necessarily hold the same world view as herself. I mean, No one would act the way she does...unless they were totally psychotic! She didn't come off as a drinking type or pot smoker type. So was that used as some sort of really cheap excuse for her acting how she did? Who wrote this crap??, lol Personally, no matter how much the host begged, I wouldn't accept the invitation to dine at a dinner party...especially business related. Just way too awkward and uncomfortable. However if it was just a normal family dinner, that'd be ok. In short, her whole behavior was absurd. Especially the end. So stupid, lol. The only thing I did get from this movie is how tiny Hayek appears to be.

Let Me In (I) (2010)

Decent enough on its own but pales to the original

[5/10 · 20 March 2011]

I watched the original movie last year and this remake last night. I'll keep this short. If "Let The Right One In" was a classic piece of literature, "Let Me In" is the cliffs notes version.

The film making in of itself is decent enough and enjoyable. The atmosphere is sufficiently haunting and creepy.

However, if you were to compare it to the original, "Let Me In" is a mere shadow...a shell. Characters, motivations and subplots have been striped bare so what you have is very lazy and inept screen writing propped up by a facade of good atmospherics.

This is an original movie vs remake comparison only as I understand that even the original movie is a striped down version of the book! (but isn't that always the case?)

I wholeheartedly recommend anyone interested to seek out and watch the original.

Can't wait to get my hands on the book.