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mr-jpallen
Reviews
Jeepers Creepers (2001)
So bad
I just hate horror films where the main characters have to make repeatedly nonsensical decisions for the plot to work. Nothing makes any sense like the demon guy suddenly appearing on the roof of a cop car out of nowhere. It could have been written by a 5 year old. Absolute waste of time for a film. The only redeeming feature was that it was well directed and the music score was good. I only watched it because I realised the main character was the inspiration behind Scary Terry from Rick and Morty. If you are looking for a scary horror movie to watch then do not bother with this. I'll never get that time back.
Star Trek: Picard: Farewell (2022)
Utter Borefest
The writers should be ashamed. This entire series was horrendous. Okay the first couple of episodes were okay but then it just slowed down to a glacial pace. There was never any real danger or suspense. Q could just click his fingers and make everything better again. Quite literally the worst ever series of star trek. Also where the hell did that kiss from with Geri Ryan? No build up. Just went for it.
The Power of the Dog (2021)
Any slower and it would be going backwards
Almost nothing happened. I love westerns but this was so dull. I saw the critic's reviews and was thinking something amazing must happen in this last hour... Nope.
Star Trek: Voyager: Before and After (1997)
One of the best episodes
I love the year of hell and this prequel sets it up brilliantly. The pacing is excellent and the mechanic of her jumping through time just as she's getting closer to solving the puzzle of her time travel keeps you on the edge of your seat. Love the concept and it's a great episode for a character that largely took a back seat in season 3.
Star Trek: Voyager: False Profits (1996)
The worst ever episode
The voyager crew are desperate to get back home and we've seen the lengths the crew have gone to, to get back. Sometimes stealing technology to do so. Yet suddenly there is a wormhole that will take them back to the Delta quadrant in a few hours. But there are a couple of ferengi causing problems on the nearby planet. Instead of just beaming them aboard and going through the wormhole they do a whole song and dance about how to make the ferengi leave and keep the local population happy. It's completely nonsensical and none of the characters seem in the least bit concerned they may not make it back through the wormhole in time before it collapses if they continue to play around on the planet. Obviously we are only in season 3 so they need to somehow not get back through the wormhole which is exactly what happens when the ferengi miraculously escape by overpowering a single guard and then accidentally destabilise the wormhole. Oh and of course we can't have the ferengi in the show anymore so they conveniently get pulled through. How this absolute joke of an episode made it onto screen is beyond me. The writers/producers should be embarrassed.
Rick and Morty: Amortycan Grickfitti (2021)
Is it going the way of The Simpsons?
I honestly can't understand what they are thinking with the last two episodes. The storylines have been poor, with barely funny jokes that are little more than toilet humour gags. They need to go through the best episodes and let the writers of those do the Rick and Morty scripts for the next 70 episodes.
Moonraker (1979)
What a terrible bond film.
I'm a big fan of the franchise but this was awful.
The chase scene in venice could have come straight out of carry on film. They played then rewound a pigeon glancing to one side to give the effect of a double take. Waiters were pouring beer over guests and bad guys had the intelligence of five year old children.
Cannot believe they didn't include the opening few chapters from the book where bond comes up against drax at the card tables. Saying that apart from the character names the film bares no similarities with the book whatsoever, it is utterly different.
Looking at other user reviews I seem to be in the minority, people seem to think this was a good bond film. I doubt these people will be inclined to read the book but to get an idea of how good this film could have been i would greatly encourage it.
Perhaps one day they will remake this film keeping much closer to the novel. lets hope so.