only30secondstomars Reviews

Green Street Hooligans (2005)

good, but not life changing

[4/10 · 2 October 2005]

I thought this movie was rather entertaining. But I thought it was kind of contrived and played out. You could basically see every plot twist or big occurrence coming from far away, so the entire movie was just you waiting for it to happen.

Not to mention it had some really bad "meaningful" lines. Such as "I was going to learn something they could never teach me in Harvard," and other lines that were supposed to obviously be inspiring or moving, but were kind of cliché. And a lot of what he said about fighting was pretty much covered in Fight Club and every other movie about fighting ever.

But I thought the fight scenes were well done. And yeah, overall it was a good movie, just not mind blowing.

Twin Falls Idaho (1999)

a laugh a minute

[3/10 · 10 May 2005]

I was surprised to find out everyone who's seen this movie thought it was amazing. Because the dialog was BEYOND bad, not to mention the acting sub par.

First, NO conjoined twins have ever looked that good in real life. Second, the dialog was blatantly bad, including one of my favorite lines at a Halloween party, "This is the only day of the year they're normal."

Everything that could stereotypical in your mind go for a couple of conjoined twins, goes wrong in the span of this movie. People taking pictures while they sit in the park, them being approached and the attempt made to make them into freak show superstars.

And at the end, when he was living with the other freaks in the like run down abandoned circus? Come on. There's a STRAY ELEPHANT. I couldn't even tell my friend that ending without laughing.

Not to mention the editing was awful and jumpy from shot to shot. A lot of time scenes lacked cohesiveness.

Jurassic Park III (2001)

Dino-awesome.

[10/10 · 29 November 2004]

From the movie starting out with the awesomely clever "Dino - Soar" company, this movie was just set up for success.

Apparently the American public did not realize this.

I feel that the public overlooks the subtleties that make this movie amazing. For example: when Dr Grant falls asleep, and wakes up in the helicopter, everyone is gone, but he turns to his left, and there is a raptor that in Billy's voice says ".... ALAN?"

Pure genius.

And when the tracker is about to be run over by the aeroplane, but is snatched up by, the admittingly silly looking spinosaur. That was one intense moment.

I also have to give them props for totally admitting that the husband and wife were annoying, with asides and quirky commentary between Billy and Alan mocking them, saying how they don't want to be left alone.

This movie is an A+ in my book.

Napoleon Dynamite (2004)

This movie rocked hard.

[10/10 · 23 September 2004]

Typical nerd? Yes. But not "movie typical" where they're really cool in the end. Napoleon is a liar, has a huge ego, thinks he's an awesome drawer, wears shirts with palomino horse shirts and is overall just a jerk.

Thats what makes this awesome. Yeah, in the end he wins people over. But he's still playing teatherball alone. And thats exactly how it would happen in real life. The nerd wins over the entire school for a moment, but still, he's not cool, and no one talks to him.

Spun (2002)

a delightful romp in the world of methampehtimines

[8 April 2003]

At first, the quick cuts and high tension of this movie made me think it wasn't going to work out,but one gets used to it, and it calms down as the movie moves on.

I describe it as a light weight Requiem for A Dream, you don't get really attached to the characters, and there is a black humor streak throughout the entire movie. The charecters are not deep, but intriguing all the same. Jason Schwartzman definetly takes on the roll of Ross with surprising gumption. The Cook and Spider Mike are great characters that add alot to the movie. I rather enjoy the Cook's speech in the porno shop. Frisbee and the cops were great. Even the fact that half these actors are well known did not bother me.

The soundtrack goes well with the movie, with some music by Billy Corgan, (who also makes a cameo as the doctor) and Phantom Planet, Schwartzman's band.

This is a great movie despite bad reviews.