MSHughes-1 Reviews

The Prisoner (2009)

You Mean There Was A Director?

[4/10 · 4 May 2010]

I loved the original, and I was prepared to give this 're-imagining' a chance. It wasn't as bad as I thought it might be, but it needed a much firmer hand on the wheel, and at least two more rewrites. It just goes to show that you can't even re - imagine if you don't have any imagination to start with. This version tries to be rather more, well, metaphysical than the original, but again, a lot of that just comes out like that pseudo-philosophical gibberish that got spouted from any available orifice - whether or not intended for communication - in the second Matrix movie. Not awful but definitely not great. Like Ian McKellen.

Sleuth (2007)

The Emperor is starkers - no sleuth required

[2/10 · 12 July 2009]

At the name of Pinter, every knee shall bow - especially after his Nobel Literature Prize acceptance speech which did little more than regurgitate canned, by-the-numbers, sixth-form anti-Americanism. But this is even worse; not only is it a tour-de-force of talentlessness, a superb example of how to get away with coasting on your decades-old reputation, but it also represents the butchery of a superb piece. The original Sleuth was a masterpiece of its kind. Yes, it was a theatrical confection, and it is easy to see how it's central plot device would work better on the stage than the screen, but it still worked terrifically well. This is a Michael Caine vanity piece, but let's face it, Caine is no Olivier. Not only can he not fill Larry's shoes, he couldn't even fill his bathroom slippers. The appropriately-named Caine is, after all, a distinctly average actor, whose only real recommendation, like so many British actors, is their longevity in the business. He was a good Harry Palmer, excellent in Get Carter, but that's yer lot, mate! Give this a very wide berth and stick to the superb original. This is more of a half-pinter.

Hijack (1998)

Under Par : Dismal Territory (tagline: My career's off the rails!)

[4/10 · 5 July 2009]

On the other hand, why not just watch Under Siege 2 again and save yourself a job? There seemed a time - long, long ago, I know - when Jeff Fahey seemed to be going somewhere. It seemed as if he might be going to the same kind of place, say, Billy Zane was going. Unfortunately, they misjudged their stop and got off at Palookaville, where they have been resident ever since, hardly troubling the rest of us with their 'adventures'. And then, after so long - this! Does anyone else see the irony of a 'vehicle' for JF being... a hijacked train? This is even worse than the Pinter-penned drivel that was the remake of 'Sleuth'. Why take something good and regurgitate it as this kind of pap? Well, actors got to eat too - even if it is crow.

Wanted (2008)

Laughable but fun. Sort of. Hmm.. is 'fun' too strong?

[5/10 · 31 October 2008]

This is a movie that falls firmly into the category of '(Quite (Not Very)) Entertaining Garbage'. It might have had something going for it if we hadn't seen The Matrix ... all those years ago. But what the hell, put your mind on 'coast' and sit back for a (kinda) fun hour-and-a-half you'll never get back. For me the inclusion of the name 'Angelina Jolie' in a cast list is a near-guarantee of poor quality. On the other hand, 'Morgan Freeman' usually has the opposite effect. Maybe Morgan is saving up for his divorce or somebody's been stepping on his chlorpromazine, but either way his presence is something of a mystery. I can understand how films like this get made I just don't know why. Maybe it's because we're alone in an endless, silent, eternal emptiness - an emptiness we try to fill any way we can... oh now I think someone's been stepping on m y chlorpromazine

Space Marines (1996)

Eek!

[1/10 · 18 September 2008]

I don' know what movie you guys were watching, or alternately how to characterize the parallel branch of the Great Tree on which this trash comes out looking entertaining. You l i k e d the guy channeling a third-rate panto artiste doing his Captain Hook? If a ticking crocodile had emerged from subspace and taken a bite out of him - hey, let's be fair - out of everyone involved in this tax-scam fiasco - t h a t might have been entertaining. A little bit of Aliens (rendered in high-impact chipboard), a little bit of every maverick-takes-on-stiffnecked-brasshat -but-they-end-up-pals movie, a bunch of no-hope has-beens (rendered in high-impact chipboard). Hey, what's not to like - once the Lithium's kicked in