mikecallander Reviews

Star Wars: Episode II - Attack of the Clones (2002)

The best movie this year 10/10

[15 May 2002]

All of the things lacking in Star Wars episode 1 were picked up in this great prequel. Truly the best movie in the past full year since Exit Wounds. A brilliant cast, completely digital Yoda, and Hayden Christenson as anikan(which is way better than that Jake lloyd charcter) were awesome! Ewa n McGreggor is also electrifying(just like stephen segul in Exit Wounds)I dont get why ebert gave this 2/4 stars though,its such a great movie,which is easily comparable to Escape from L.A. This is (in my opinion) the best Star Wars movie yet. The old ones had the worst actors like Mark hamill,he's so bad! They should have had Arnold Schwartzaneggar play his part,as for Carrie fischer,Elizabeth taylor could have done a much beter job. But this was a great movie,go see it,you will not regret it as you did with a beauitiful mind

The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring (2001)

Truely the best movie of 2001 (10 out of 10)

[10/10 · 14 February 2002]

When I saw this movie with my friends, I knew it would be the best movie I have seen in theatres since Saving Private Ryan. The little details everywhere adapted to the book(which I have read many times)well. All the characters were developed magnificently and the props were incredible. I myself watched this film 3 times in theatres and I'm still not board with it. I suggest if you have not seen this film,go see it. You will not regret it(like you did with Exit Wounds). But there is only one movie you should not see,you guessed it, Exit Wounds! This was truely the worst movie since 15 Minutes. Stephen Segul is terrible(as usual). Back on to topic. Lord of The Rings was excellent, see it. And if you have, see it again. Thats all folks!

Rollerball (2002)

A pathetic attempt. * out of 10. Almost as bad as Exit Wounds

[1/10 · 13 February 2002]

When I saw this movie,I knew it would be horrible. I was right. That guy from Fast and The Furious is one of the worst (behind Stephen Segul of course)in the entire world. I'm sticking with Ebert this time,but what i dont get is he gave Escape From L.A. ***1/2 out of for. I watched it and commented on it not long ago (read it,it is quite funny)and it was almost as bad as this. This movie (with the exception of Exit Wounds)is the worst movie out right now. If you are in to these kind of movies(which are terrible)see it,if you want to be throwing up at such a script as bad as this. My advice to you is do not see it,it will give you that same queezy feeling that Exit Wounds did. Yes, it is just that bad. Thats all folks!

Exit Wounds (2001)

I know I have already commented,but it was just that bad.

[1/10 · 12 February 2002]

Hey it is me again. As you may already know,I have already commented on in my opinion,the worst movie since Escape Fom L.A.. If you have seen this film(which I advise you dont)you will know my need to make fun of Exit Wounds. Stephen Segul(along with Kurt Russel) has got to be the worst actor in American history. His chickish pony tail is the fruitiest thing since Shaq in Kazaam. And DMX,come on,he is the worst actor/rapper sice Marky Mark and The Funkey Bunch. The only advice I myself can give you is:do not see this movie. And if you do,dont forget the barf bag. Yes, it is just that bad.

P.S. Escape from L.A. is terrible!

Escape from L.A. (1996)

When will Kurt Russel stop acting?

[1/10 · 6 February 2002]

I would have to say that Escape from L.A. is one of the worst movies

I have ever seen. Why did they have that fruit Kurt Russel in it? He is

nearly as bad an actor as Shaquille O'neal. And Really,the plot has nothing to do with the title. He is more like going in than escaping. Oh,and i can not remember a script as horrible as this. On the first movie,he goes in to save the president after he crash landed his airplane in New York, A city that is entirely a prison. Then, on the sequel,he goes in to L.A. (which is also a prison)to save the president's daughter. I could have wrote one myself better than this. Instead of the tagline being"snake is back",it should have been"Snake is back,and a lot of people look p***ed". Or,"Snake is back,and nobody cares".Thats all folks!

Faerie Tale Theatre: Rip Van Winkle (1987) Season 6, Episode 1

doesn't live up to the tale...totally

[1/10 · 2 February 2002]

I watched this show with my son one night. I rented it thinking it would match up to what the original story is. My son had to be put to bed early because he was either frightened of a scene or just plain bored. If your looking for a good Faerie Tale theatre episode, see the frog prince or aladdin. Rip van Winkle was obviously never at the peek of the series success. But I did think it was, "okay." It doesn't deserve much else.

Exit Wounds (2001)

A pathetic attempt.*(out of 10)

[1/10 · 1 February 2002]

Could have been a little better if they did not have that fruit Stephen Seagul.It was also stupid how they said they were in Detroit but really in Calgary.I would have to say this film,(along with "Romeo Must Die")is DMX's worst film.He is as bad an actor as rapper.