wroclawkontakt Reviews

Constellation (2024)

Constellation? More like Constipation.

[1/10 · 22 February 2024]

Jesus H Christ what a t*rd this one is, this has to be one of the worst space shows I've seen.

As far as artistic choices and directing goes - nothing makes sense here, it is completely directionless and filled with meaningless scenes, played by characters I did not care about in the slightest.

There is little to no introduction to what is happening in the beginning, and it spirals downwards from there with your usual run of the mill "something went wrong but we don't know what", "hallucinations in space", "russian equipment not working properly", "horror-esque semi scare shots" etc.

The only reason I decided to give it a try was because the moment I looked it up here on this site, it was rated at 8.1. As I've reached the 3rd available episode at the time of launch (so basically 3hrs later), in the moment of writing this review, the rating is at 7.2. I doubt it will end up above 6.

Huston, change the program.

Monarch: Legacy of Monsters (2023– )

Legacy of Boredom

[5/10 · 15 December 2023]

Would you like to watch a show full of unlikable charachters, their trials and tribulations, simple dramas, memories from their past affecting their present, where none of that is important in the grand scheme of the main thread?

No?

How about all of that on a backdrop of some sci-fi?

Still no?

What if we make it slow, nothing will make sense, and barely anything will be explained?

Well then come on in, take a seat and make some popcorn. You'll need it as snacks will be your main entertainment here :)

Apple already made once a show of similar quality, where there was an invasion happening, and it was as energetic and interesting as this show, where the whole show was also focused on personal dramas rather than monsters and aliens, despite similarly misleading name.

I guess 6 stars for that invasion show must have been a smashing success in Apples eyes, because they basically copy pasted that same formula to this show. I already know it is terrible, but it is fun watching as rating slowly drops from 8 at start, closer and closer to 5 where it belongs.

A Murder at the End of the World (2023)

If this show died, it wouldn't be the end of the world.

[4/10 · 5 December 2023]

Darby Hart (MC) is not a genius, and of all things she could be they decided to make her a hacker. She is not a hacker, more like a script kiddie, and oftentimes I have a hard time buying that she is even smart, let alone a genius.

Granted, it's not at the very bottom, on par with some of ncis/csi/etc two-people-sharing-one-keyboard-hacking, but it is bad, kind of like "we have hacking at home" hacking.

Normally I would just let it slide, if it wasn't the case where a lot of progress in the show happens because of that. And as far as her intelligence goes, she does not seem to even care not to leave a trace, when she does her half baked investigation.

To top it all of, Murder at the End of the World is full of slow paced meaningless scenes, that were probably added to make you feel the atmosphere or get attached to characters, but I'm afraid the show failed at both.

Icing on this tesco value cake, is the fact that this show was made by the same person who made The OA, so there is a fat chance that it will go nowhere and get dropped without anything being resolved and/or explained.

This is a wild goose chase, something you watch on a plane where there is nothing else left to do and you have already seen all of the available Sandler movies ;) Don't get attached, and don't get your hopes up. Background show, 4 stars at best.

Yellowjackets (2021– )

Devide rating in half, and watch it prepared to be dissapointed.

[4/10 · 4 December 2023]

Show is unfortunately below average despite having good actors and good music.

Main problem I see with it, is that the show itsef doesn't know exactly what it wants to be.

At first it seems it's going to be a horror, then drama, then teen-drama, to reveal at the very end that it was a grotesque-teen-cringe-dark-comedy. And none of it works.

It's hard to describe my disappointment in detail without revealing parts of the show, so the only thing I can say is that it is beyond me why at the time of writing this review, it has above 7 rating. Beware that if you want to watch a 7 stars show, this one might not be it. I for one, won't be watching 3rd season when/if it comes out.

From (2022– )

From top to bottom.

[6/10 · 6 June 2023]

Show started with rather disturbing first few moments, that made me immediately think of cheap horrors that rely on CGI, gore, and nothing more, but I was pleasantly surprised with rather interesting premise, good cast, and all around well made show. At the beginning that is.

Without giving absolutely anything away, I can say that this is one of those shows that starts strong and slowly disolves itself into a soap opera.

First season ended without a strong note, and slowly but surely with each new episode in second season, I watch more and more completely meningless scenes with social interactions between characters (that consist of mostly made up nonsense, forced problems, and people constantly not believing what is happening), where the main plot basically stands still and nothing is being explained.

At start I'd rate it at 8. By the end of first season it was 7 for me. Now mid second season I rate it, at best, 6/10.

Suspicion (2022)

Please don't watch the last episode. Don't do it to yourself.

[5/10 · 23 April 2022]

Gosh darn it, it started so well, with such an interesting story.

It turned into a cliche of drama action nonsense so fast. I lost my interest in it a few times but decided, against my better judgement, to play it in the background to see where the story goes.

Boy was that a mistake. Whatever that show gave me in entertainment value over the span of its episodes, it took away ten folds in anger, over the stupidity and nonsense of the "big reveal" in the last episode.

5 stars is generous.

Severance (2022– )

Worth your time.

[10/10 · 23 April 2022]

Hard to review it, and not spoil it at the same time. Severance is one of the best mystery shows that I've seen so far.

Apart from the obvious drama and sci fi show that will get you hooked in one episode, it is also a dialogue about our modern way of life, and about the way we divide our private time and work.

Great choice of actors, shot really well, really good script, everything that's in it is of substance. I wish I could use severance procedure, and watch it again in one fell swoop.

White Hot: The Rise & Fall of Abercrombie & Fitch (2022)

Hot Garbage is what this is.

[1/10 · 23 April 2022]

I love me some documentaries, but this is not a good one. I don't even think I would go as far as to call it a documentary to be honest. This film is a weird rant from a tornado of talking heads.

A gathering of random former employees, and some other people, give their opinions about A&F brand. And they all seem to have a problem with race. As if it was illegal, or even wrong, to have a business that is targeting an audience.

On the subject of random people and their race oriented opinions, funny thing is that Dr. Treva Lindsey mentioned at the very beginning that she used to walk by A&F shops and all she could see is that they were "so thin and white"...

..while at the same time, she admits that she herself would wear clothes from designers like FUBU, Mecca, and these urban wear designers, right as a string of exclusively black people are shown on screen, and guess what..

..not even a word about those shops targeting black people.

Didn't you notice Dr. Lindsey that those shops were black, or (to keep the analogy) black and not thin?

Awaken (I) (2018)

Random

[2/10 · 30 January 2022]

First of all music completely doesn't match the atmosphere an pace of the footage. You get grand and loud cinematic strings already in 4th minute of the material with absolutely no buildup and no context.

Mix of pretty but totally random scenes that amount to nothing. It basically is a vimeo/instagram slomo B-roll stiched together as one long movie.

Archive 81 (2022)

Meh

[6/10 · 30 January 2022]

I cannot get over how bad the lead male acting was. Dan has only two faces- neutral with a bit of a smile, an neutral with a bit of confusion in his eyes. That's it.

The story seemed interesting at first but slowly went downhill as it unraveled, with ending being 'meh' at best.

It wasn't terribly bad, I gave it thumbs up on netflix as it is above 5 in my opinion, but it certainly isn't 7.5 (where it sits at the moment), I'm not waiting for a season 2 is what I'm saying.

Invasion (2021–2024)

They did not manage to invade my curiosity.

[3/10 · 25 October 2021]

So far nothing happened for the first three episodes. They contain anything but the story of the actual invasion, just a collection of points of view from some rather unlikable characters, and their problems that I have no desire to learn about.

I watched the first two, and third I mostly fastforwarded (apple tv plus was so kind to involve a view during ff play, so I know the content of the third episode but wasted minimal time).

Had they named it "Regular people affairs with a sci-fi backdrop" it would have been a 6 star show, with "Invasion" it's 3 at best.

Dune World (2021)

Doodoo Doone

[1/10 · 9 September 2021]

It's dune allright, but them dunes aren't the sand ones, those are dookie piles.

I took one for the team so you don't have to. Avoid, unless it's a party screening and everyone is drunk, then show it to the guy who is already passed out.

Into the Night (II) (2020–2021)

Into the Bingewatch: Season2

[8/10 · 9 September 2021]

If the first season kept you on the edge of your seat, second one should be the same.

As with previous season, you have to turn the blind eye on some of the unnecessary drama, and clearly fabricated problems between characters, but after that the second season is good, and ends way faster that I would want it to.

Funny thing - I started it after work and didn't stop until the last episode, so in a way I was going into the night as well, maybe that is the secret reason for the series name.

The Green Knight (2021)

I wish I skipped this one.

[3/10 · 23 August 2021]

Maybe for someone who knew the tale of the green knight beforehand, this would be something close to a movie, but for me it was bonkers bad.

Don't get me wrong, actors were great, and so was the production, costumes, and all the visual aspects.

It's just the story that makes no sense.

Story is trivial on the surface, and meaningless underneath it. You have to bend over backwards to ascribe something deep to it, but to that extend you could do that with every movie, and then it's just you making stuff up.

A Quiet Place Part II (2020)

It makes even less sense after part II

[1/10 · 30 June 2021]

1. If the creature can hear you from miles away when you speak, it could hear your breath and hartbeat from upclose. All those scenes with creatures slowly aproaching and the protagonist trying to stay quiet or hide are ridiculous then (for example the one in the basement in part I, or in the train in part II).

2. Lack of oxygen kills creatures in water, but somehow didn't kill them in space before they got here?

3. If creatures can't survive in water then all islands, boats, cruise ships, or even continents they did not land on, are safe. This is not a global cataclysm, but rather a local tragedy then. Rest of the world is fine and needs a bunch of their aircraft carriers to be parked on the coast of unfortunate land and slowly clean it using planes and aircrafts.

4. Creatures are so tough that it's hard to kill them with a regular gun, unless they hear a certain frequency, and then.. then what? Their biological outer shell toughness somehow gets turned off, and now a todler with a metal bar can kill them?

5. Or is it that it is easy to kill creatures once they have those sound flaps up? In which case that whole frequency thing wouldn't make a difference since they have those flaps up a lot. You just have to wait for a moment.

6. This series shouldn't be called "A Quiet Place", but rather "A Loud Place", since the creatures can't operate in loud enviroments.

It would be so much safer in a loud place. Think about it, in a quiet place your stomach growls - dead, you fart - dead, you sneeze - dead, you burp - dead, there is so many things that you cannot control.

It only took rain (fire sprinklers to be precise), for creatures not to be able to locate their pray. That would mean on land a loud place is the safest one. Like a waterfall from the first part.

7. If creatures run blindly in the direction of sound, it would be incredibly easy to make a trap like a dock with water or a cliff, to kill them all one by one with a remotely triggered loudspeaker pretending to be a prey.

Seriously, if they rely on sound so much, how hard is it to come up with an idea to use it against them? And you have islands and continents of people unaffected that could make those traps, and install them while a loud swarm of helicopters and jets is flying aropund as a distraction.

8. On a topic of speakers, even if the main family decided not to live by the waterfall, why couldn't they at least put some speakers in the distance and blast something on them in cases of emergency? They did have wires and electricity to power those chains of lightbulbs in part I, didn't they?

That's already 8 points, and I haven't even touched those ridiculous situations created by displayed characters, that could be another 8 points or more (encrypted message in a song? Really? What for? Because only "the good guys" can decode it and come to your island?).

I wanted to point it all out after the first part, but decided (against my better judgement) to hold it off untill after I see the second one, kind of hoping for some reediming scenario. That unfortunately did not happen. I have no idea why this got the ratings it did, I for one, cound not stay quiet any longer.

Infinite (2021)

Watch it in the background of something more important

[5/10 · 10 June 2021]

Incredibly cheesy, predictable, and overexplained.

Actors are good, visual effects are nice, I guess that is where the budget was spent, because script must have been written for free by an intern.

Stowaway (I) (2021)

A brief explanation for my low rating.

[1/10 · 24 April 2021]

Movie started. Good cast, nice atmosphere, shot nicely.

6 stars to begin with.

Up to 7 stars when the plot thickened with mysterious discovery.

Down to 6 stars when no one mentioned that the extra passenger was in a compartment with a lid screwed in from the outside.

Down to 5 stars when it turns out nothing is important about this extra dude, and no one botheres to explain anything.

Down to 4 stars when I'm made to believe that a 2 year space travel had no backup plan on board. No repairing machines, no redundancy for life support, nothing. What is this? RyanCosmos?

Down to 3 stars when upon facing solar radiation in 20 min, they decide to take one tank with them, risking their life. At this point extra passenger is out of the equation, but with algae gone they still need one O2 tank for crew of 3 instead of 2, so they are risking 2 lifes for one.

Down to 2 stars when they lose this tank in the most goofy and idiotic way possible.

Down to 1 star when the girl decides to sacrifice herself in a stupid heroic gesture, just because a monent ago she did not have a second to disconnect that one remaining leaking tank that was left.

Cosmos is full of stars, maybe they should fetch a few of them on a mission, instead of the oxygen tanks next time, because whatever was good in this motion picture, was wasted on my frustration with extreme stupidity that was presented.

All Is Lost (2013)

Urgency is lost

[5/10 · 2 April 2021]

No sense of urgency is what kilked this movie for me.

I can forgive some of those stupid decisions made by the sailor, or suspend my disbelief with regards to what should be on the boat in the first place, but if the main character moves and acts as if he was drunk or didn't care if he survives, then why should I care?

And it's not like there is anything else to do than analize his every move under the magnifying glass, when there is no dialogue.

Acting wasn't bad, and I liked how it was shot (though the choice of music was strange).