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5/10
Surprisingly meh.
20 October 2009
Warning: Spoilers
I rented Rosemary's Baby after having heard for many years what a perfect horror film it was. I thoroughly enjoy psychological thrillers and horror films like the Exorcist, Alien, Prince of Darkness, and the entire Hitchcock oeuvre, so I thought Rosemary's Baby was right up my alley.

Sadly I was mistaken. Most of the movie I ended up yelling at Mia Farrow's character to DO something (Rosemary really is a spineless, mindless idiot), when I wasn't groaning over the rather hammy performances of the other actors. Perhaps I'm too young to understand the "helpless woman" type of character, but instead of being in fear for Rosemary, I was simply annoyed by her.

The "rape scene" was the "highlight" of the movie, in that it had some genuinely creepy sequences (again, her husband's appearance and dialogue seemed out of place, but that was a minor part of the sequence). The rest of the movie, while trying to seem normal and everyday, just seemed obvious and annoyingly overacted. Even if you didn't figure out that the neighbors were up to something in the first few minutes, I would think you'd still be annoyed by them.

The supposed twist ending isn't really a twist at all, at least to me. It did provide some surprising laughs, as I don't think I've ever laughed that hard at a "Hail Satan!" Again, its supposed to be creepy that supposedly normal people are saying this, but it just comes off as campy.

All together, I really can't understand why this is still considered one of the great horror movies of all time. In 1968 Rosemary's helplessness might have led to psychological scares. In 2009 it just leads to frustration.
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9/10
Spectacular - but you need to pay attention.
28 January 2002
Believe not all you read. Kung Pow is a great comedy in the vein of Airplane! However, I will add that this movie is not for everyone. This movie is best suited to a person who can pay attention and has seen enough movies to appreciate all the spoofs contained herein. (Paying attention is particularly important, as there are several reviews of this movie that talk about scenes that were not IN the movie - several of the supposedly horrifying jokes never took place). Many jokes are shown vaguely in the background or are so small they are easy to miss (watch for a name tag). Shakespeare it isn't, but if you enjoyed Airplane!, Hot Shots!, the Pink Panther movies. . . well, give Kung Pow a try.
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Star Crystal (1986)
1/10
Worst Movie Ever (almost)
10 January 2001
Warning: Spoilers
Contains minor spoiler content. . . (but hey, for this movie, who cares?)

If there is anyone in the world who truly liked this film, get them to a shrink quick, because this film is truly one of the worst ones ever. Between the horrible acting, the terrible script (guess what the African American character likes? Yup, that's right. . . fried chicken!), the computer made out of corrugated cardboard (you can see the corrugations along the edges, and yes, it bends) the mostly SEDENTARY alien (except of course for his tentacle), and the ending that makes Barberella look like high art, this movie reaches new lows.

The only redeeming quality? If ever there was a movie that deserved to receive the MST3K treatment, it's this one. It is a great movie to rent if you feel like popping something in the VCR, turning the volume all the way down, and providing your own dialogue (although some of the characters lines are so laughable they have to be heard to be believed.)

BIGGER SPOILER -- and yes, at the end, the Alien finds Jesus and there's a music montage of humans and aliens cavorting. Or something.

Ed Wood would be proud.
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