Corinthian Reviews

Night Terrors (1993)

Contains the most hilarious scene in movie history.

[1/10 · 7 March 2000]

This is one of those movies you see in the video store that you just HAVE to get because it just looks so horribly bad. And indeed, we couldn't take most of it. There was a lot of fast-forwarding going on.

But then we came across a scene where Robert Englund seduces the female protagonist (her name somehow slips my mind at this time). CRIPES. I've never watched a single scene from a film so many times (I'm estimating forty or so). And I've never laughed so hard in my life. You see, Englund has this thing for showing off his loins. I last saw the film a couple months ago, but I can't stop laughing as I type. Anyway, the scene is a montage of shots-- Englund ripping off the lingerie of the girl, Englund riding a horse naked, and some mysterious woman fellating a snake's head. This is absolute genius. You've got to see it for yourself.

American Pie (1999)

Blatant attempt at shock-humour, a la South Park

[5/10 · 2 January 2000]

A lot of low-brow, shock/toilet humour, is all it is. Little kids will obviously love it. I thought it was more or less decent, until my friends recently forced me to watch the "Unrated" version on video. I didn't notice too much difference, except that it was much more apparent how lame it was this time around. All my friends were laughing at the jokes, so I guess it works for some. The only memorable moments: The slick Shermanator, and the brilliant booty dances (whenever they think their friends are on their way to getting booty). And of course, if eye candy is what you're looking for, there's Shannon Elizabeth and Tara Reid.

The Talented Mr. Ripley (1999)

Not for everyone.

[7/10 · 2 January 2000]

I found The Talented Mr. Ripley to be a fairly decent movie. A strong cast, excellently directed, gorgeous settings, and a suspenseful plot, with Jude Law delivering both the strongest performance and the most intriguing character.

But be forewarned: as with too many films of today, though, the film is marketed as something it is not. The film is darker, heavier, and slower than it appears to be. The regular movie-goer may not enjoy it much if they're accustomed to thoughtless swill like Titanic. And some won't appreciate the homo-erotic undertones, apparently since, well into the movie, they become overtones. What starts off as subtle allusions become over-the-top, so much so that the audience expects the characters to start shouting "I'm gay!" any moment.

The Talented Mr. Ripley is long and can be slow for some, but watch it, just for the jazz scenes, for the fantastic soundtrack, and watch it for Jude Law's scene-stealing performance.

Fight Club (1999)

Would've worked better as a 4-minute music video.

[5/10 · 24 December 1999]

**minor spoilers**

Sure, the film is visually spectacular, as all Fincher pieces are. The picture is slick, you've got a couple 21st century icons in Norton and Pitt, a palatable attempt at nihilistic pseudo-social commentary, and the occasional moment of brilliance (ie, "Slide!"). Oh yes, and the gratuitous violence.

I enjoyed the first act. All the elements were there; Pitt is excellent, and Norton is steady. Bonham-Carter gives her least annoying performance ever. The film is fast-paced, and has its share of innovation. The messages that it alludes to are more-or-less subtle. So far, so good.

Then comes Project Mayhem. Something about soldiers or what-not. Anarchy disguised as a cause. An excuse for the audience to enjoy more blatant violence on the screen. The movie completely loses its direction the moment Fight Club tries to be more than it is-- both the organization in question, and the film itself. From here on in, we have to endure Pitt's character's constant, irrelevant, and usually flawed, babble. Example: the convenience store "hold-up", and chemical burn scenes. And don't forget the deeply insightful line, "Self-improvement is masturbation".

The message of anti-consumerism was already established early on in the film by Norton's character; it was unnecessary for Pitt to ram it down our throats for the rest of the movie. The radical post-capitalism, year-zero philosophy is also nothing new. Anyone socially and politically aware in the 70's and 80's are familiar with the Cambodian Khmyr-Rouge vision. This is pretty much irrelevant, though, since Fincher is catering to the teenage North American male. I suspect that most of the rave reviews for The Fight Club are from this demographic. Who else would buy into the forlorn suburban working-class white male rage bit so easily? Yes, folks. Your angst will disappear by kicking the hell out of each other.

To cap off this deeply flawed movie is another Keyser Soze ending. As unconvincing as its like in Sixth Sense, it seemed more like an effort to get people back in the theatres a second time than a well-thought, intrinsic element of the plot.

The Fight Club might have succeeded if it dealt away with its temptation to say something important, and stuck to a collage of pretty shots of men wailing at each other, talking penguins, and Norton covered in human fat. Four minutes would've sufficed.

The Straight Story (1999)

Human triumph story at its finest.

[10/10 · 23 December 1999]

This truly is one of the most honest, emotional movies of today. As Alvin Straight makes the trek to find his brother, he exudes good will and this is reciprocated by those around him. The screenplay and acting was mostly impeccable. It was in general so good,in fact, that I would forget I was watching a movie until, occasionally, a not-so-perfect line would disrupt the flow for a brief moment. In any other movie, such a line would go unnoticed.

Farnsworth, playing the 72 year-old, gave the performance of the year, here. On the other hand, I'm sure Sissy Spacek could've given an equally effective performance without being so irritating.

All in all, one of the best character-driven films I've ever seen, along with Stand By Me and Show Me Love. If you're one who grew up with attention deficit disorder, and can't concentrate on a movie unless it's an endless array of gratuitous sex and violence, then no, you might not like this movie. But if you've ever been enthralled by the stories your grandfather tells you in front of a fire, then this is for you.

Dogma (1999)

Dogma-- It's no Dogme. (Insert groans here)

[8/10 · 13 November 1999]

I was raised Catholic, and I have to say, To hell with the whiners. Get over it. With that out of the way...

I was disappointed in terms of it being a Smith movie, but I was prepared for a lot of it going in. I understood Smith's ambition to go beyond his Jersey Trilogy fanboy nametag. I tried to swallow the whole Alanis thing, though I would never understand it. I did my best to look past Hayek's terrible performance. She basically ruined every scene she was in. Looks like she'll never be able to succeed past her stereotypical Mexican vixen roles. Stick to Desperado, Salma. There are questionable casting choices, including wasting Jason Lee on a one-dimensional villain, but Chris Rock has won over my skepticism. He pulls in the laughs, and surprisingly kept the grating aspect of himself to a minimum. Rickman was amusing, though a little pasty-faced. Fiorentino, Damon and Affleck turn out appreciable performances, as to be expected.

On to Smith's directing: He really shouldn't. I'm a huge fan of his writing, but he should at least let someone else coordinate any sort of action sequence. The look of the film isn't adequate for a piece this ambitious.

You won't see the same wit,or the play on pop culture that was so prevalent in his Trilogy, but you'll see what has become of the vision he had before Clerks. He put a lot thought into this, though it definitely doesn't have the heart that I saw in Chasing Amy. But it's made an impact on me. It hasn't changed what I think, but perhaps, how I think. Beyond the tediously over-dramatic "God", and the dung-thing I still haven't figured out, I think I got the idea.

Star Trek V: The Final Frontier (1989)

Marsh melons?

[2/10 · 31 October 1999]

This movie was ridiculous, from the "Psybok's brainwashed army" to the "Journey to find God". It's not even considered to have truly taken place within the Star Trek timeline. My suggestion to you: if you've already rented it, just watch the first and last five minutes. The scenes with Spock, Bones, and Kirk camping are a gem.

Batman & Robin (1997)

Hilarious. I laughed my socks off.

[2/10 · 11 October 1999]

It's unbelievable how the Batman series has become progressively worse with each new release. The first one was great, the second was pretty good. Then "Goodbye Burton, hello Schumacher".

The result? A total and utter joke. Batman Forever was already a cartoony eyesore. It was unimaginable how a next movie could be even more insulting to the Batman universe. well, the certainly managed. Somehow. I wonder if the actors (Thurman, Schwarzenegger, whoever played Bane) realize that they looked like complete imbeciles? And let's not start on the dialogue.

Usually, in cases where other aspects of the film are lacking (in this case, everything), you'll find eye-candy in terms of crowd-pleasing action scenes, and fun fights. Unfortunately, Schumacher demonstrated that he had no idea what he was doing, and he couldn't even pull THAT off. I don't think the camera manages to keep up with what's going on. God knows I couldn't. They would've fared better with a giant penguin doing the camerawork.

But you know what? Overall, I recommend this to anyone. I couldn't stop laughing throughout. And I found myself looking forward to the next time Arnold opens his caveman mouth. I had a blast watching it. I'm sure you will too.

A Room for Romeo Brass (1999)

Delightful, yet disturbing.

[8/10 · 10 October 1999]

I saw this at the Toronto International Film Festival in September. Romeo Brass is a young teenage boy, and his best friend is Gavin, who has problems with his back and difficulty walking. When an eccentric man comes into their lives and befriends them, their lives begin to unravel.

Paddy Considine is excellent as Morell, a socially inept man who chooses to seek friendship with youths, probably because they match his intelligence and maturity. There are many light-hearted and often hilarious moments with the new threesome, especially when Morell becomes intent on pursuing Romeo's older sister. As the story unfolds, though, we begin to realize that the stakes are much higher than merely a few gags the boys are playing on Morell. It's part American Beauty, with two families that, when encountered with new circumstances, realize that they can't continue living in that fashion, and proceed to reinvent themselves, not knowing how they'll turn out. It's part Julien Donkey-Boy, with Morell drawing parallels with Ewen Bremner's character. Both, superficially, seem to be plain idiots that manage to consistently squeeze laughs out of the audience with low-brow humour. But soon we realize the social maladjustment runs much deeper, and the films become much more twisted than we ever expected. Writer/director Shane Meadows is to be commended for a late scene in the film so powerful he has the entire theatre gasping. In a de-sensitized era of film where all the blood, gore, guns and knives can't make an audience blink, this is quite a feat. Meadows relies on strong character and plot development for its effectiveness, as well as the philosophy that "less is more".

Watch it, and you'll know what I'm talking about. It's well worth it.

Julien Donkey-Boy (1999)

Mostly effective fragmentation; Herzog steals the scenes.

[7/10 · 10 October 1999]

Saw this one at the Toronto Film Fest as well. Some will love it, and I'm willing to bet a lot of people will hate it. The cast is stellar, but Werner Herzog, who plays the father, really shined, especially in the hilarious scenes where he "trains" his son into becoming a winning wrestler.

Often, when watching this film, you won't be sure how to react, or how you should react. But it is nonetheless provocative, and should be worth the hour and a half even if you end up hating it.

Korrine does fail, though, in the length of certain scenes. Some seemingly insignificant scenes are drawn out much too long, leaving the audience checking their watches, and taking away the emphasis from other scenes that where justifiably long.

Korrine also seems to take pleasure in incorporating the odd and freakish in his films, including a multi-cigarette eating man and an armless drummer (the latter which I had met in a motivational conference that was held when I attended high school).

Overall a commendable piece, though it's no Kids. And though I feel Dogme95 is more limiting and self-serving than anything, it sure beats $140 million to make Armageddon.