hripka-2 Reviews

The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything: A VeggieTales Movie (2008)

Similar to past VeggieTales - yet different

[5/10 · 12 January 2008]

Positives: An above average kid movie, with enough adult references to keep the parents interested. Not as hyperactive a movie like other modern movies aimed at children, a plus. A decent moral message.

Negatives: For those expecting a biblical message, as with other VeggieTale productions, you will be disappointed. There are analogies to biblical themes, but nothing explicit. The idea of the "helpseeker" floating golden ball, a major element in the movie, which is a magical device that helps and guides the main characters throughout, had a sci-fi, mystical aspect to it. The very idea of a "helpseeker" was against the very character of what I had come to expect from past VeggieTales productions.

As a kids movie, I would give it a 7. But for those expecting a VeggieTales biblical message, look elsewhere. My disappointment over the moderation of their message reduces my rating.

Kingdom of Heaven (2005)

Crusaders just didn't talk this way.

[4/10 · 15 May 2005]

Plus: Very well done technically, amazing CG battle scenes, excellent shots of the fortress Kerak and of Jerusalem. Saladin, played by actor Ghassan Massoud was excellent, the best actor of the entire movie; Jeremy Irons was also very good, Liam Neeson next, and Orlando Bloom is very far down the list.

Minus: A very secular movie, and VERY P.C. movie. I find it very hard to believe that people spoke/believed this way in 1184, when this movie takes place. (I know, I know, I was not there.) These are Crusaders, trying to defend Jerusalem from being won a SECOND time by the advancing Muslim armies. But the script/dialog is very anti-Christian in how the Christian side explains their motives. When you have Crusaders not knowing the difference between the Christian religion and the Muslim religion, then why in the world are they even there?? They are fighting for Jerusalem, which, quoting Saladin, is both 'nothing' and 'everything', yet they seem like it is just another fortress. This happens throughout the movie, and you start seeing a very strong anti-Christian bias by the filmmakers. The only people with any faith in their faith are the Muslims, so I suppose Muslim filmgoers will like it. All the Christians come off as very weak characters. King Baldwin, played by Edward Norton, is a possible exception. He is a noble character, but his disease is so horrific he is more to be pitied. The Christian priests are the worst, acting like scum: robbing from the dead, showing no compassion, and are fearful, surrendering hypocrites. The other Christian characters seem ranging from neutral to extremely cynical (more from the year 2005 than 1184), hard-bitten, secular and worldly. Only Balian shows any semblance of faith, and even he is shown to be very doubtful. His rallying speech to the defenders of Jerusalem was unlike anything a Crusader was likely to have said. Completely unbelievable!! This movie is no Gladiator. Gladiator, and even Troy, are both much more entertaining 'historical' films, with characters that you would root for. I rate this 4/10 (10 high), mainly for visuals.

Joe Versus the Volcano (1990)

One Man Faces His Fears

[10/10 · 26 October 1999]

An under-rated film, but one of my personal favorites. JVTV has a great collection of actors playing memorable roles. The chief (Abe Vigoda) is hilarious! But Marshall (Ossie Davis) is someone I would like to meet someday. The film has a rich, varied look from the industrial grime of the opening to the depressing advertising office, to the lush romantic dinner, to the upscale shopping in New York City, to the overview of LA at night, to the storm, to the MOON, and finally to the colorful volcanic island of Waponi-Woo. The best part of the movie, and the part that too many people miss is the insight that most people go through their life just going through the motions. They are not truly "aware." Joe, living a depressing life, gets a chance to live life to the fullest. All he needs is courage! Cowardly Lions from "The Wizard of OZ" take note! By facing his fears, he is able to overcome them. Most of the things holding us back are truly between our own two ears. What is your "Volcano"? Are you able to "jump in"?? Joe faces his fears, and is a better person for it. There are many symbols in this movie, which unfortunately, some people don't get right away. Are you losing your sole? What "lightning bolt" in your life is warning you of danger? What people do you deal with? Dede/grungy, Angelica/waspish, or Patricia/delectable? All three are played perfectly by Meg Ryan. (Some people complain about that one actress is needed to play all three. But they are all different sides of people's personalities. Using one actress carries this symbolism.) Great scenery, great songs and great dialog! I own a copy, and try to watch it at least once a year. It makes me laugh, and also make me wonder what volcanoes lurk in my life.