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Argylle (2024)
Director got Bored
The first 2/3rds of this movie were solid - a 7.0, perhaps 7.5. But after that, it's almost like the director got bored, or drunk, or maybe they ran out of money. The dance in smoke while killing bad guys was just ... dumb. The ice skating in oil (on concrete), also ... dumb. Adding in 3,412 plot twists just because you can ... dumb. I know people will say it was supposed to be silly, and that's fine. But the first part of the movie had a certain style of silliness to it - it was mocking spy movies. The dances and ice skating was something a 8 year old would think of.
And it was long. Way too long. It's the first movie in a long time I thought of leaving because it was so bad. I was going to see either this or The Beekeeper. I made the wrong choice.
All Creatures Great & Small: On a Wing and a Prayer (2023)
Hallmark would be proud
I don't usually write reviews, but felt compelled. With each passing season, this show has become more of a soap opera than it's original style (about animals). This episode personified that. It was way over the top, including the cheesy music. It has now strayed too far from the original series (which was about being a vet) for my liking.
Now technically it does include a story about a bird, but that's minor. As soon as the officer rejected James' request to go home to see Helen, we all knew what was going to happen - and there was no surprise there. I think the nail in the coffin was when Helen gave away her cat.
Top Gun: Maverick (2022)
Cheesy
I guess i have an unpopular opinion. If you just watch the last 90 minutes and the final fight scene, it's a solid 9. All the other stuff is painfully cheesy. Way too many close-ups of Tom Cruise and him smiling at everyone. It was painfully predictable. No surprise, but it had a superficial romance angle. I hope they didn't pay a lot for the script!
Catastrophe: Episode #4.6 (2019)
Disappointing
# spoiler alert #. I love this show. My wife and I enjoyed most of the episodes, but I thought the last one wasn't very good. I didn't like how Rob went off on Sharon and then the next day, she apologises. It's just wrong on so many levels. And then the very ending. I know it's fiction, but I can't believe any husband doing what he did. I don't buy all the metaphor for their marriage stuff. I thought it was the wrong way to end the show.
Undercover Kids (2004)
The acting was painful
I'm not going to comment on how 'ugly' the kids were, that has nothing to do with the quality of the production. The plot was painful - where the genius knew a major recording star, and they were best friends ... that was just a bizarre plot twist. The writing was really bad ... some of the dialogue was something that you'd write back in high school. But the worst part of all was the acting. The same group that wrote the script back in high school acted as though they were back in high school. I can't think of a single person who looked as though they were a professional actor. Having said that, my nine year old kids enjoyed it.
Minikillers (1969)
Only if you're a Diana Rigg fan ...
I just saw this movie online. It was ... interesting, to say the least. I'm sure that my review here is longer than the lines in the script of the movie. If you're a Diana Rigg fan, then by all means, watch and enjoy - she's as beautiful as ever. If you're a fan of a good plot or mystery, then Dora the Explorer has this movie beat. It's a movie that probably has a cult status among Rigg fans - it's odd, strange and hard to truly describe. You will walk away from the movie with a, "What was that?" in your head. I can only assume that Ms. Rigg was given a free vacation to film it, and I can only imagine how little money she was given.
The Being Frank Show (2010)
Painful ... so painful.
I was up late one night, I think it may have even been Christmas Eve after I returned from visiting family. I stumbled onto this show, and I could not believe how painful it was to watch - it was like a proverbial train wreck -- terrible, brutal, yet I couldn't look away. It was an episode with Mike Bullard. Frank (the host who I had never heard of), looked unprepared, his jokes were flat, and the audience (all 10 of them) looks like the only reason they were there were for free beer. I encourage you to watch for the sheer experience of watching - certainly not because it's quality.
And to top it of, he had one guest who was a proficient musician (name I cannot recall). Frank complimented him on his new CD (which he had in his hand), and then the guest corrected him - it wasn't his CD - it was done by students at a local university who he mentored/directed, etc.
Love $ Greed (1991)
All the bad acting of a porn movie, without the porn
Spending more than five minutes to write this review, will do the value of my time a great injustice. The idea is that an Uncle dies and in the will states that a couple must have a baby within a year and a day of his dying... and they get the $23 million his estate is worth. Here comes the funny part -- that couple has since split up and dating other people.
That's the premise of the movie. The acting is nothing short of dreadful in this movie, and I think the budget only allowed for two cameras and one microphone. Rent this movie only if you're having a, "What's the worst movie you ever saw" party ...