Alien Vs. Zombies (2017)

Alex Knapp: Joe

Quotes 

• Parker : So, you're like an alien or something?

  Joe : Alien is a derogatory way of saying it. Imagine someone from your south being called a redneck or one of your African-Americans being called a...

  Parker : Okay, I get it, sorry, then what are you?

  Joe : I am an extraterrestrial life form, a very confused extraterrestrial life form.

• Parker : Why do you look human?

  Joe : Why do you look Sednian?

  Parker : Fair enough. You have great hair.

  Joe : I know, but are you still sick like the last earthling?

  Parker : I'm not sick and neither was that guy, he's dead.

  Joe : Dead? Impossible.

  Parker : Possible.

  Joe : My books say differently, that the dead don't come back to life and they don't eat each other.

  Parker : My books say you should be a little green man with a giant head and bug eyes.

  Joe : You are a very offensive, little earthling.

• Joe : Owiplock was right, earth girls are easy. You think she's ready for intercourse?

• Joe : Surely, those computers must be a more expedient way to access information.

  Librarian : No computers, no internet, you said you wanted to learn. The youth of this country think they know everything about everything because of Wikipedia, it's so wrong, wrong, wrong.