Mojave Diamonds (2023) User Reviews

I wish my brother Roy was here.

[nogodnomasters · 2/10 · 6 June 2023]

Teaser opening with guys shooting at each other going down a desert highway, Good guys crash off the road. We flash back to two days earlier. Roy Mason (Donald Cerrone) drives a rig and does some MMA fighting while his other two brothers are more settled down. All three served together in the Army in what I could tell was a sniper motor pool. Roy gets suckered punched in a fight and loses. Julian (Quinton 'Rampage' Jackson) who runs everything has Roy make a run for him or else Joe's family gets it. Joe and Roy don't get along. He has to run raw uncut diamonds from Vegas to Baja. I don't know what's in Baja, or why they are doing this since they dug up the diamonds on their own property. And why conceal them in boxes when a small vehicle and a brief case would do. Maybe take Jennifer Anistan along to pose as a family so I don't get bored watching women punch each other in the head. The plot was ill conceived. Acting was Ice Tea horrible.

Guide: F-word. Sex. No nudity. Go watch Wick IV again and see if they changed the ending.

Wow, this is so laughably bad from every aspect.

[Top_Dawg_Critic · 3/10 · 2 June 2023]

I can't think of any film I've seen that's had worse editing than this mess. Some scenes cut in and out so randomly you'd think the film was spliced and joined blindfolded. You then have producer, editor, writer and director Asif Akbar that couldn't get even any other part of this film right. The directing is so laughable in some scenes, I actually feel bad for Cerrone; when he's driving the transport, it's clearly and so obvious he's not, and it's a green screen outside of the make-shift cab.

But even worse, when Cerrone is driving the red SUV, his hands are constantly rocking the steering wheel back and forth so fast and so much, you won't be able to hold back your laughs. Then the SUV randomly loses control and Akbar has the drivers bail from a moving vehicle that simply just rolls to a stop on it's own, no cliff, ditch, water or any other reason to have them bail out of the SUV, except when it goes over a small sand bump, which sounds and looks like a Hot Wheels toy car. We couldn't stop replaying that scene and laughing so hard.

Even funnier, Akbar clearly got his rough-diamond look playing Minecraft, because un-mined diamonds are not found in such colorful glass-looking rocks like they showed in the film. Guess he forgot to Google what rough diamonds look like.

Then we get this nonsense convoluted, cliched and predictable writing with logic-defying moments, such as burying an entire military base arsenal inventory under a horse stall, or trusting 50M worth of diamonds to be delivered by only one person and his brother, without having your own crew and/or added security following them for protection. There's just so many more plot holes in the writing you will get a workout with the cringing and eyerolls.

Don't get me started on the cheesy dialogue, long dragged out and mostly unnecessary scenes, terrible sound, loud and overbearing score, shaky-hand camera shots, and so on and so on. Akbar couldn't even direct his cast properly, as the only person that was somewhat convincing in their character was Rampage Jackson, because everyone else came across like this was their first acting job, even Cerrone.

This is one of the worst films I've ever seen, and it's so bad, it's actually entertainingly funny and should be listed as a comedy. I'd skip this one for sure, unless you're drinking and blazing with a group of friends and want to laugh non stop.

Saved by Cerrone, but only just.

[paulclaassen · 4/10 · 7 June 2023]

The film's poster attracted me to watching it. However, this misleading poster can be deemed false advertising. There's no truck being pursued by the cops. In fact, there's no truck being pursued by anyone and there are no chase sequences, as I had thought.

Martial arts superstar Donald 'Cowboy' Cerrone stars as Roy Mason, who has a history of being in trouble. When he owes mafia mob Julian (Quinton Jackson) a favour after losing a substantial amount on a fight, Julian offers Roy a chance to redeem himself (and pay his debt) by transporting $50 million worth of rare diamonds from Vegas to Baja. Julian also trusts him for the job because he is a professional and skilled truck driver.

Roy then asks his brother Danny (Chris Maher) to join him on the trip. And this was the moment I had high hopes for the movie. I anticipated a trucking movie in the vein of 'Smokey and the Bandit' or 'Convoy'. However - and there might be spoilers here - the truck is simply stolen whilst parked at a gas station. When Roy and Danny finally get to the truck again - left at the side of the road - they find the diamonds gone. And this was the last of the truck...

The antagonists are mob boss Julian, and Paulie (Weston Cage), who works for him. The film becomes a bit confusing when Paulie disclose towards the end that the land where the diamonds were found belonged to his family. If this was indeed the case, then how did Julian become the boss and how does he actually fit in the picture? Both these antagonists are very weak characters, and both equally badly acted by the respective actors. The dialogue was also very standard and I never viewed them as true villains.

When Roy and Danny's older brother Joe's family is kidnapped by Julian, the film becomes a rescue mission. This final act is so clichéd and sensational, and the final confrontation with Paulie was so badly done. In general, the film was not a bad effort and is watchable, but could have been so much better.

I thought Cerrone did a great job as Roy (he looks and sounds so much like Tom Hardy!), but the rest of the actors were not that great. On another positive note, the cinematography was good. The film also features some really good photography, but also bad photography at times. The editing was also inconsistent; good at times, and very bad at times. For me, the film was saved only by Cerrone.

Stay away from this STINKER at all cost.

[psxexperten · 1/10 · 29 October 2023]

I was feeling generous, so I'm giving a single star rating.

Buckle up, my fellow action movie fans, because I've just stumbled upon a film that left me in a state of speechlessness - and not in a good way, mind you. Now, I'm not one to write reviews, but this cinematic atrocity has pushed me to do so.

When MMA fighters or WWF wrestlers is involved in a movie it's doomed to be a disaster. The acting sucks, the filming sucks and the lines was definitely written by a 6th grader.

Let's talk plot, or should I say, the lack of it. This movie's storyline is so nonsensical that it doesn't deserve the dignified title of a plot. It's a baffling puzzle where every piece is missing, and trying to make sense of it will give you a headache.

To sum it up, "Do Not Waste Your Time" should have been the official tagline of this cinematic disaster.

Save yourself the agony and find something else to watch - anything else.

Bottom of the Bargain Bin at the Dollar Store

[stephbauer-00998 · 1/10 · 11 July 2023]

Another poorly directed movie by this director. Akbar-directed or produced movies are some of the most cringe seen on the planet -- it is very comedic to anyone who's seen them by now! I'm pretty sure soon enough the director of these god-awful films will be considered dead to these actors or rather famous athletes from the UFC shall I say.

Mohave Diamond is no different as a movie if you can even call it one [?] All he did is pull some high-caliber names together as he does and turn them into seemingly parody actors on a cheap set w/ a highly cliché--filled storyline. I'm quite sure he pumps out these generics films to generate some quick income & that's it! Doing it in a rush..

.. Asif never cares to put out a quality film.. the last thing on his mind I'm sure.

Chael Sonnen delivers the performance of a lifetime

[apotodyssey-01772 · 10/10 · 2 June 2023]

Just as he was the King in the UFC, undefeated and undisputed fighter Chael Sonnen makes his debut as a main character in Mojave Diamonds and shows the world what a perfect acting performance looks like. You would be hard pressed to find a better acting performance in 2023. Rampage Jackson brings his usual humor and charm even though he is playing the main villain of the movie. And Cowboy Cerrone brings his usual tough guy role to the movie. Overall, I think this film easily deserves best film at the oscars, and Chael deserves best actor. Whether it's 1 on 1, 2 on 1 or 5 on 1, the rest of the films at the oscars are going to need 911.

Throwback to the action movies of the 80's

[shagee7977 · 10/10 · 3 June 2023]

"Mojave Diamonds," directed by Asif Akbar, is a fast-paced action thriller that takes viewers on a gripping journey. The film centers around Roy Mason (Cerrone), a former MMA fighter who finds himself in trouble with the Vegas mob. After losing a high-stakes fight and costing mob boss Julian (Jackson) a significant amount of money, Roy's life takes a dangerous turn.

To repay his debt, Roy agrees to transport a $50 million shipment of diamonds to Mexico, accompanied by his G. I. brother Danny (Chris Maher). However, when a rival gang steals the diamonds and abducts their younger brother Joe's (Sonnen) family in retaliation, the three siblings must unite and infiltrate the mob compound to save their loved ones, regardless of the risks involved.

The film showcases Cerrone's portrayal of Roy, a down-and-out character who competes in illegal MMA fights and struggles with personal demons. His performance effectively captures the character's desperation and determination to set things right. The tension escalates as Julian's menacing presence looms over Roy's every move, further heightening the stakes.

The family dynamics between Roy, Danny, and Joe add an emotional layer to the storyline. The strained relationship between Roy and Joe, coupled with the threat to Joe's family, adds complexity and gives the audience a reason to invest in the characters' struggles.

Director Asif Akbar's vision shines through the well-executed action sequences and suspenseful moments. The cinematography by Jan-Michael Losada enhances the film's gritty atmosphere, immersing viewers in the dangerous world the characters inhabit. Richard John Baker's music effectively complements the film's pace, intensifying key moments.

"Mojave Diamonds" delivers an engaging storyline filled with high-stakes action and familial bonds. While the plot remains relatively straightforward, the film compensates with strong performances, impressive cinematography, and a captivating atmosphere. If you're a fan of adrenaline-pumping thrillers, this movie is worth checking out.

JT was amazing in his performance along with the cast

[terryeligio · 10/10 · 13 June 2023]

I was most excited by the amount of MMA fighters put into this film to. Mojave Diamonds," directed by Asif Akbar, really showed off his skills putting the cinematic scenes to the test! Having Rampage Jackson come out and deliver along with Weston provided a fast paced action-packed thriller. Seeing Big Bubba, JT, come out and do his thing in this film to handle business was exciting to me since I love his work. The director Asif Akbar really showcase the storytelling and how each scene was a symbolism of family ties and how much each scene mattered towards the understanding of the relationship played in each character. The cinematic scenes were filled with many action and it was exciting to see how everything would play out.

My focus was set on JT and how he opened up his role becoming the protagonist in the movie. I wasn't expecting him to come sooner than he did but within about 10 minutes in the movie, he lays the smack down on Roy and it really sets the tempo throughout the movie. I really love the way Weston fulfills his role in the making of the movie and how Rampage delivers his dialogues to really show everyone who was the boss in the movie.

This movie was full of action packed scenes and it really gave a throwback feel to the movie opening up some nostalgic scenes.

Wow, wow, wow

[magiciancolin · 10/10 · 21 January 2024]

What have I just witnessedxthis was a masterpiece. They have some big names in this film, the script was some of the best that I have seen in recent time. They took pride in what they were filming and it all played off. The acting deserves love as they really are professionals making a masterpiece. Mohave Diamonds is a film everyone deserves to watch and marinate their brains with. This should be seen on the big screen so you can see all the key details that are at play. The director has made another masterpiece and this one is better than all his other masterpiece films. The last thing is the amazing camera work that helped tell the story.