The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet (TV Series)

The Initiation (1954)

Ricky Nelson: Ricky Nelson

Quotes 

• [Harriet is concerned about the upcoming initiation for David's club] 

  Ricky Nelson : You're in a club, aren't ya Mom? That women's club?

  Harriet Nelson : Well, if you mean the Ladies' Auxiliary, yes, but I'm afraid our initiation isn't quite so drastic.

  Ricky Nelson : Whaddaya have to do?

  Harriet Nelson : Drink a cup of tea.

  Ricky Nelson : Gee, don't they even put any mustard in it?

• Ozzie Nelson : What's going on here?

  David Nelson : Our club is having our initiations, and Stan here is one of the pledges assigned to me. Stan, this is my father.

  Ozzie Nelson : [Stan bows twice to Ozzie]  Oh, hello there, Stan.

  David Nelson : He's not allowed to talk, except to say...

  Stan Taylor : His honorable royal master, David Nelson.

  Harriet Nelson : [Harriet comes into the room]  Lunch is ready, boys.

  David Nelson : Uh, Mom, this is Stan.

  Harriet Nelson : Oh, hello, Stan.

  [Stan bows three times to Harriet] 

  David Nelson : He can't talk. He's being initiated into our club tonight.

  Harriet Nelson : Oh, that's too bad. Whose idea was that?

  David Nelson : Oh, it's the regular procedure. See, if the pledges can't talk, then they can't complain about anything. Pretty smart, huh?

  Ricky Nelson : Sounds pretty dumb to me.

  David Nelson : Nobody asked you. Besides, he can say something.

  Ricky Nelson : Hey, that's right. I almost forgot. Tell me, Stanley, who's the dumbest guy in town?

  Stan Taylor : His honorable royal master, David Nelson.

  David Nelson : Hey, wait a minute. You're only supposed to do the things I tell ya.

  Ricky Nelson : I like this way better.

  David Nelson : Well, anyway, your time's about up, Stan. You can go home and eat now if you want.

  [Stan bows to David] 

  David Nelson : You can talk, too.

  Stan Taylor : Honest?... Well, do you have any liniment? My back's killing me.

  David Nelson : Why don't you wait for the initiation? You may have a spot where you'll need it more.

  Stan Taylor : Maybe you're right. Well, so long, Dave, and thanks a lot.

  Harriet Nelson : Wouldn't you like to stay and have lunch with us, Stan?

  Stan Taylor : No thanks, Mrs Nelson. I've gotta be hurrying home and get ready for the initiation. My mother's gonna sew a pie plate in the seat of my pants.