Zorro (TV Series)

Death Stacks the Deck (1958)

Guy Williams: Don Diego de la Vega, Zorro

Photos 

Quotes 

• Zorro : [Garcia sneaks up on Zorro. Annoyed, Zorro aims a gun at Garcia's stomach]  "I am not sure what impression this little bullet will make of that huge stomach of yours, Sargeant... but I'm willing to find out!

• Don Alejandro de la Vega : He is made of good stuff, but he has never had to face responsibilities. It might help him too, Diego, if you could set him an example. And take a greater part in the affairs of the pueblo, and serve the community.

  Don Diego de la Vega : A famous poet, Father, once said that they also serve who only stand and wait.

  Don Alejandro de la Vega : I sent my only son away to military school, expecting they would send me back a fighter. I got a poet!

• Sgt. Demetrio Lopez Garcia : And Clara, later when you finish work, then will you sit with me for a while?

  Barmaid : I will not sit with you now! I will not sit with you when I am finished ! Not tomorrow or the day after! For the last time, I will not sit with you at all!

  Sgt. Demetrio Lopez Garcia : I will finish what I was saying later.

  Barmaid : You have finished before you have started!

  Don Diego de la Vega : Well, you're making progress, Sargeant. I remember when she would not even speak with you!

• Zorro : [Sgt. Garcia aims a wine bottle at Zorro]  And you, Sargeant! Stay away from wine!

  [Zorro shoots the bottle. Garcia chases Zorro. Zorro knocks him unconscious with a wine jug] 

  Zorro : I warned you, Sargeant, to stay away from wine!

• Don Diego de la Vega : Well, I do not think that you would refuse me sergent!

  Garcia : No, Don Diego! Someone recently warned me to stay away from wine! But, Brandy is not wine, is it?

• Carlos Urista : You can use the money, but what can an outlaw do with the Rancho Santio? Perhaps you and I can make a deal.

  Zorro : I would be glad to make a deal with you, señor. If in two hours you are within 5 miles of the Pueblo de Los Angeles, I'll kill you!

• Don Diego de la Vega : Well sergeant, perhaps the mistake in your thinking is, you only think of yourself as a sergeant! You must think of yourself as the commandante. A man is what he thinks!

  Sgt. Demetrio Lopez Garcia : That is philosophy, Don Diego? I am what I think. I think I am the commandante!

  [singing] 

  Sgt. Demetrio Lopez Garcia : I'm commandante of the pueblo. I am, because I think so. Every inch a handsome soldier, trim of hip and broad of shoulder.

  Cpl. Reyes : How do you know?

  Sgt. Demetrio Lopez Garcia : Because I think so!

  Cpl. Reyes : Ho ho, because he thinks so.

  Sgt. Demetrio Lopez Garcia : I am the man who'll capture Zorro. I am, because I think so. Though the Fox is very wily, I'll pursue him oh so slyly.

  Barmaid : How do you know?

  Sgt. Demetrio Lopez Garcia : Because I think so!

  Barmaid : Ho ho, because he thinks so.

  Sgt. Demetrio Lopez Garcia : Now in battle I have won so many battles that my chest can't hold another single one I fear.

  Barmaid : The only kind of medal that you'll ever get will be for terrific feat in running to the rear!

  Sgt. Demetrio Lopez Garcia : I am the man the ladies love so. I am, because I think so. Senoritas can't resist me, they're my slaves once they have kissed me.

  Don Diego de la Vega : Now is that so, because he thinks so?

  Barmaid : No no, not 'till he shrinks so!

  [mimes García slimming down] 

  Sgt. Demetrio Lopez Garcia : No no, I cannot shrink so!