Buffy the Vampire Slayer (TV Series)
Bad Eggs (1998)
Nicholas Brendon: Xander Harris
Photos
Quotes
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[regarding Xander's boiling of his egg 'child']
Rupert Giles : I suppose there is a sort of Machiavellian ingenuity to your transgression.
Xander Harris : I resent that... Or possibly thank you.
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Buffy Summers : [about the egg experiment] I can't do this. I can't take care of things. I killed my Giga Pet. Literally. I sat on it and it broke.
Willow Rosenberg : You'll do fine.
Xander Harris : Yeah, the thing that stresses me is, when do we tell them they're adopted?
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Willow Rosenberg : Did I really hit you?
Xander Harris : You knocked me out.
Cordelia Chase : Did I hit you?
Xander Harris : Yes. Everyone hit me.
Cordelia Chase : Good. Well, I don't mean good because I hit you, but, I didn't wanna be left out.
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Mr. Whitmore : S-E-X. Sex. The sex drive in the human animal is intense. How many of us have lost countless productive hours plagued by unwanted sexual thoughts and feelings?
Xander Harris : Yes! Mm-hmm.
Mr. Whitmore : That was a rhetorical question, Mr. Harris, not a poll.
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Xander Harris : Can I just say... *gyeurgh*!
Buffy Summers : I see your gyeurgh, and raise you a nargh.
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Rupert Giles : Well, but, uh, the good news is that they're, uh, not amongst the great thinkers of our time. I doubt if they're up to much, they're probably just drawn here by the, uh, Hellmouth's energy.
Xander Harris : 'Nuff said! I propose Buffy slays them. All in favour?
Willow Rosenberg : [she and Xander raises their hands] Aye!
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Xander Harris : You gotta take care of the egg. It's a baby. You gotta keep it safe and teach it Christian values.
Willow Rosenberg : My egg is Jewish.
Xander Harris : Then teach it that dreidel song.
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Xander Harris : Apparently, Buffy has decided the problem with the English language is all those pesky words.
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Buffy Summers : [skipped class] Did Mr. Whitmore notice I was tardy?
Xander Harris : I think the word you are looking for is "absent."
Willow Rosenberg : Tardy people show.