Most films have protagonists between the ages of 25 and 45. In childhood and adolescence, one identifies with them as grownups. As the years pass, the view becomes as contemporaries. I've only gotten as far as late middle age, but at this point, while I can be lulled into a sort of suspension of disbelief and view characters 15 years my junior at eye level, more and more, I identify with their parents. This is abetted as the boomer generation ages, and many people now long in the tooth formed their adult identities during and after the values shift of the 1960's.
That said, when you look at the Wagners' relationship from the vantage point of a certain age, one can understand why two people bonded by parenthood and hard experience through the years might persist in a union where romantic love is a distant memory. Familiarity, trust, recollection of how much worse other potential mates were during one's dating years, and fear of going it alone make their presence felt. In your 50's or your 70's, one wonders "Who would want me now?"
For most of us, this is as happy an ending as we're going to get, like it or not. There comes a time when one is too tired, too sick, and/or too set in one's ways to start over yet again. Successfully rearing a child has its rewards, and as libido wanes, sometimes that's enough. One's acrimonious relationship with one's mate can be a shelter without alternative.
This film takes an unflinching look at these realities...what is, as opposed as to what "should be," to borrow a distinction often made by Lenny Bruce. Acceptance is the last of the seven stages of grief. Or to quote an old Country/Western song title, "It's not love...but it's not bad."
That said, when you look at the Wagners' relationship from the vantage point of a certain age, one can understand why two people bonded by parenthood and hard experience through the years might persist in a union where romantic love is a distant memory. Familiarity, trust, recollection of how much worse other potential mates were during one's dating years, and fear of going it alone make their presence felt. In your 50's or your 70's, one wonders "Who would want me now?"
For most of us, this is as happy an ending as we're going to get, like it or not. There comes a time when one is too tired, too sick, and/or too set in one's ways to start over yet again. Successfully rearing a child has its rewards, and as libido wanes, sometimes that's enough. One's acrimonious relationship with one's mate can be a shelter without alternative.
This film takes an unflinching look at these realities...what is, as opposed as to what "should be," to borrow a distinction often made by Lenny Bruce. Acceptance is the last of the seven stages of grief. Or to quote an old Country/Western song title, "It's not love...but it's not bad."
