I Don't know what to think about this one, first off the acting is kinda split, there are some okay actors and others are bad, but I would not call it good acting. I actually thought the directing was "good" and the script wasn't bad either, so there are some pluses! But one thing I didn't like at all was the ending I thought it was way to much like a scobby doo ending instead of a horror movie ending. This movie didn't have wonderful character development either, I really didn't care about the characters. There are some funny parts, so that helps out the movie. It is a bit gory also, nothing shockingly gory but it has its gory moments! So on a final note I'm going to give this movie a 5.5/10 MAYBE a 6 but probably a 5.5/10
24 Reviews
I'm a greens keeper and...................
gkar72312 October 2003
I FINALLY got to see this movie. I was looking forward to it but was thoroughly disappointed. The plot, if any was there, was lame and tired at best. The acting was below sub-par (for the corpse). The directing was too choppy with jagged scene shifts and the lighting and audio need help. I would not recommend this double-bogey movie to anyone.
Rocker
xposipx13 March 2017
When someone starts using the business end of a pair of hedge clippers on the more snobbish patrons of a posh country club, rumors fly the slice-n'-dice handiwork is the signature of The Greenskeeper, a serial killer long thought dead from an explosion years ago. Allen, whose mother owns the country club, begins having nightmare visions where he is haunted by The Greenskeeper. Allen begins to suspect he may have a connection to The Greenskeeper he never dared imagine. Meanwhile, the beautiful jet setters of the club decide to sneak in after hours for some skinny-dipping, partying, and sex-on-the-green. Unfortunately for the teens, The Greenskeeper decides to crash the party, and armed with golf equipment and landscaping tools, begins picking off Izods one by one. Joining forces with his new love interest Elena, Allen races to the club to try to save his friends. He and Elena must play a deadly game of cat and mouse to survive, because when you have a tee time with The Greenskeeper, it's par for the corpse!
Gore should be the main attraction in a low budget slasher film. Of course, it isn't. There was way too much focus on a lame plot than the potentially cool killings. They did manage to have a slit throat, a couple be-headings, an anal insertion golf cleaner, and a hedger through the stomach. The gore was pretty dry and incredibly lazily done. With every potential murder weapon on a golf course they could have done a lot better.
The acting actually wasn't too bad to begin with. It was supposed to be super cheesy, but went overboard towards the end with the lazy/awful lines. Some of the comedy was actually pretty funny and delivered how it was meant to be delivered. Allelon Ruggiero really wasn't too bad as the loser guy. The yuppies were all played obnoxiously well and made me laugh a few times. This truthfully wasn't the bad part of the movie.
It had the b-movie feel, but there really weren't too many mistakes. There were a few bad shots here and there, but nothing that ruined the movie. The lighting and audio was always properly done(sort of.) The fake lightning was completely terrible and happened every time the killer was on the courses. That was totally idiotic. The other bad technical aspect was the music...They felt it was necessary to constantly have cheesy mystery or pop music playing throughout the movie. It really didn't have to be this bad!
Final Thoughts: This totally could have been a really fun movie with the exact same cast and crew members and script even. Cheesy music, bad (and dry)gore, lame effects, and too much plot did this movie in. I really wanted to enjoy it, but it just didn't deliver the goods. Too bad the horror movie they were watching on TV (the milkman) looked more like the movie this should have been.
Gore should be the main attraction in a low budget slasher film. Of course, it isn't. There was way too much focus on a lame plot than the potentially cool killings. They did manage to have a slit throat, a couple be-headings, an anal insertion golf cleaner, and a hedger through the stomach. The gore was pretty dry and incredibly lazily done. With every potential murder weapon on a golf course they could have done a lot better.
The acting actually wasn't too bad to begin with. It was supposed to be super cheesy, but went overboard towards the end with the lazy/awful lines. Some of the comedy was actually pretty funny and delivered how it was meant to be delivered. Allelon Ruggiero really wasn't too bad as the loser guy. The yuppies were all played obnoxiously well and made me laugh a few times. This truthfully wasn't the bad part of the movie.
It had the b-movie feel, but there really weren't too many mistakes. There were a few bad shots here and there, but nothing that ruined the movie. The lighting and audio was always properly done(sort of.) The fake lightning was completely terrible and happened every time the killer was on the courses. That was totally idiotic. The other bad technical aspect was the music...They felt it was necessary to constantly have cheesy mystery or pop music playing throughout the movie. It really didn't have to be this bad!
Final Thoughts: This totally could have been a really fun movie with the exact same cast and crew members and script even. Cheesy music, bad (and dry)gore, lame effects, and too much plot did this movie in. I really wanted to enjoy it, but it just didn't deliver the goods. Too bad the horror movie they were watching on TV (the milkman) looked more like the movie this should have been.
What a masterpiece!
ewalker724 March 2003
The Greenskeeper is an emotionally shattering experience that will undeniably open your eyes to what cinema can TRULY be. It isn't so much the character's usage of booze or crack, but rather, the emotion that the Greenskeeper conveys that truly sets him apart from your standard slasher villain. The subtle, nuanced performance by John Rocker will captivate the viewer and draw you into the mind of a disturbed, misunderstood soul. When the film is finally released to the general public, do not be surprised if you hear Oscar buzz soon building, not only for Rocker, but for the rest of the exceptional cast as well. In particular, the character of Otis Washington is played marvelously by Thomas Merdis, although it fails to match his prior performance in My Cousin Vinny as The Man in Town Square, which I am positive everyone remembers. All in all this film can only be described as brilliant, although if I were to TRULY and ACCURATELY sing it's praises, I would be sitting here typing all night... Don't miss this mindblowing combination of sex, drugs, and Rocker.
Dull and tiresome, with minimal value to be found
I_Ailurophile30 December 2023
Golf is one of the worst of all possible sports, pointlessly wasteful of natural resources and harmful to the environment; country clubs, as a playground for the rich and powerful, deserve to be abolished outright. Slashers are one of the worst of all possible movie genres, not exactly being known for cleverness. For that matter the early 2000s weren't exactly a great time for cinema, as computer-generated imagery of the era was just advanced enough that everyone and their cousin wanted to make use of it, but not nearly good enough to have aged well thereafter; conceptions of music too often involved very tiresome, sterile pop and radio-friendly rock; and humor was defined by a lot of 'American pie'-like raunchiness and 'Dude, where's my car?' stoner bits, both of which are rather dull and have very limited appeal. Now put all these elements together into one supposed "horror-comedy,' and we have 2002's 'The greenskeeper.' I didn't have high expectations when I sat to watch, but for better and for worse I'll sit for almost anything. The opening scene seems kind of promising, and the film quickly gives us a large roster of awful, obnoxious, privileged white characters that we'll be glad to see sent off to the sand trap of eternity - but otherwise, in all earnestness, this swiftly grows tiresome.
Given that the whole bent here is far less than serious, I suppose it's only fair to wonder if it's not on purpose that everything is so over the top and kitschy, and so pointedly betrays the falseness of the presentation. Are filmmakers Kevin Greene, Adam Johnson, Tripp Norton, and Alex Wier making fun of all these tropes and ideas, or using them for lack of any other creativity, substance, or means? It's a fair question, I think, as our attention is caught in the wrong way by the dialogue, characters, scene writing, and narrative; the attempted humor, the tawdrily boorish and obnoxious sensibilities about sexuality and anatomy; the direction, too much of the acting, the rather bare-faced production values, and cinematography and editing that are only ever unremarkable or outrageous with no middle ground; plain art direction, overbearing music, and aspects of homophobia, racism, and classism. Then again, maybe it's not even a question that really matters, for whether all this is employed in jest or as a sincere expression of film-making, it's just not any fun. In one fashion or another some small moments come off better than others, but I definitely didn't laugh once in eighty-two minutes. I've seen the bottom of the barrel, and this isn't it, but there simply isn't any actual entertainment to be had here.
I guess the practical effects are well done, including blood and gore. The costume design, hair, and makeup are nice, such as they are. The root story in and of itself is decent, if truly nothing special. Despite the worst efforts of all involved, Melissa Ponzio turns in a performance that is fairly admirable. But is there anything else here that's baseline commendable? Is there anything about this that is meaningfully enjoyable? I don't think there is. If you're desperate for slasher fare, juvenile humor circa 2000, nudity, or "horror-comedy," then I guess you'll find what you're looking for. Yet what possible other reason would anyone have to watch this, especially since we could be watching literally anything else instead? What's really terrible is that the only reason I found this in the first place was because the 2018 'Ducktales' episode "The missing links of Moorshire!" was so outstanding that I found myself wondering about other horror or fantasy involving golf; finding this, in turn, feels like the classic notion of a genie granting a wish, but with awful, ironic consequences. There are much worse things one could watch, sure, but for as bland and pretty much outright boring as 'The greenskeeper' is, the distinction doesn't count for much. Check it out if you like, but I don't know why you would.
Given that the whole bent here is far less than serious, I suppose it's only fair to wonder if it's not on purpose that everything is so over the top and kitschy, and so pointedly betrays the falseness of the presentation. Are filmmakers Kevin Greene, Adam Johnson, Tripp Norton, and Alex Wier making fun of all these tropes and ideas, or using them for lack of any other creativity, substance, or means? It's a fair question, I think, as our attention is caught in the wrong way by the dialogue, characters, scene writing, and narrative; the attempted humor, the tawdrily boorish and obnoxious sensibilities about sexuality and anatomy; the direction, too much of the acting, the rather bare-faced production values, and cinematography and editing that are only ever unremarkable or outrageous with no middle ground; plain art direction, overbearing music, and aspects of homophobia, racism, and classism. Then again, maybe it's not even a question that really matters, for whether all this is employed in jest or as a sincere expression of film-making, it's just not any fun. In one fashion or another some small moments come off better than others, but I definitely didn't laugh once in eighty-two minutes. I've seen the bottom of the barrel, and this isn't it, but there simply isn't any actual entertainment to be had here.
I guess the practical effects are well done, including blood and gore. The costume design, hair, and makeup are nice, such as they are. The root story in and of itself is decent, if truly nothing special. Despite the worst efforts of all involved, Melissa Ponzio turns in a performance that is fairly admirable. But is there anything else here that's baseline commendable? Is there anything about this that is meaningfully enjoyable? I don't think there is. If you're desperate for slasher fare, juvenile humor circa 2000, nudity, or "horror-comedy," then I guess you'll find what you're looking for. Yet what possible other reason would anyone have to watch this, especially since we could be watching literally anything else instead? What's really terrible is that the only reason I found this in the first place was because the 2018 'Ducktales' episode "The missing links of Moorshire!" was so outstanding that I found myself wondering about other horror or fantasy involving golf; finding this, in turn, feels like the classic notion of a genie granting a wish, but with awful, ironic consequences. There are much worse things one could watch, sure, but for as bland and pretty much outright boring as 'The greenskeeper' is, the distinction doesn't count for much. Check it out if you like, but I don't know why you would.
Beware cut version
john-souray28 February 2007
IMDb lists this as 90 minutes, but the version I saw on a British DVD (in a boxed set of individually unsellable horror films) barely got to 77 minutes. Was it cut? Since the boxed set had an 18 rating anyway (strictest in the UK apart from porn films) it's hard to know what the motivation for cutting it could be. Like censors anywhere, those in the UK can be a bit crotchety, but policies are pretty liberal nowadays and it's hard to believe that they could have found thirteen minutes' worth of cuts that needed to be made.
Well, cut or not, what was this like? The last few minutes and especially a silly and gruesome joke about a lawn sprinkler just start to hint at a comic inventiveness that is miserably lacking from the rest of the film. Other than that, the reviews of the various people here who "hated it" look pretty accurate to me, and they were probably seeing a longer film. British viewers, check out the box. If it says 77 minutes, I certainly can't recommend this.
Well, cut or not, what was this like? The last few minutes and especially a silly and gruesome joke about a lawn sprinkler just start to hint at a comic inventiveness that is miserably lacking from the rest of the film. Other than that, the reviews of the various people here who "hated it" look pretty accurate to me, and they were probably seeing a longer film. British viewers, check out the box. If it says 77 minutes, I certainly can't recommend this.
Comedy? Horror? Thriller?
SirEnrique14 July 2006
I don't know if I should laugh or cry when I think about this movie. I don't know if it's supposed to be a comedy or a horror movie. If it's a horror movie - it's as bad as it gets. If it's a comedy - it's as bad as it gets.
This is the kind of movie you don't want to spend your money on, but you want to watch it with you friends so you can laugh and/or make comments on how bad everything is. If you like to do that, here's a movie for you. If you're looking for a funny horror movie, keep on searching.
The story? A killer dressed as a greenskeeper murder a couple of "teenagers" with different golf tools. That's it. And it isn't funny, scary or thrilling.
This is the kind of movie you don't want to spend your money on, but you want to watch it with you friends so you can laugh and/or make comments on how bad everything is. If you like to do that, here's a movie for you. If you're looking for a funny horror movie, keep on searching.
The story? A killer dressed as a greenskeeper murder a couple of "teenagers" with different golf tools. That's it. And it isn't funny, scary or thrilling.
"Marco Polo, Bitches!"
cj23025425 October 2012
Picked this sucker up in the bargain bin at probably the last remaining video store in TX. When I saw score by "Kip Winger", how could I resist?! Overall, I would say it's a satisfying viewing experience if you are in the right frame of mind. It's slow at first with some padded out dialogue. But, once it gets rolling with some grisly deaths, it's quite creative and oddly funny. There's also a nice thick layer of cheese on it which helps some of the bad acting go down. And some great/weird quotes such as "Marco Polo bitches!", and "damn Stu, you got the crack wet". Major pacing problems won't make this required viewing for casual horror fans. But those that like weird, genre jumping b-movies with some creative deaths, will be happy enough.
So stupid it's worth a rental
pumaye19 September 2003
After Dentist, Ice-Cream Man, plumber, repairman and so on, at last even a greenskeeper get the spotlight as slasher killer number 600 and so in this so bad and so stupid is fun variation on the slasher theme. It is worth a rental to get a few laughs for the really bad jokes and the bad special effects that are inside.
Not bad at all
kevin-184013 January 2009
"The Greenskeeper" is one of those movies that gets better with repeat viewings (and lots of beer). It doesn't take itself too seriously and has a nice bit of humor and gore. While a tad slow at first the movie really takes off in the 2nd and 3rd act when the Greenskeeper starts his spree. I could see Hollywood re-making a movie like this with more money and some star wattage. The setting (Country Club) was clever and the methods by which the overprivileged characters were killed were inventive. The cover box was deceptive as it was too straight up horror looking when the movie really plays more like a horror/comedy. Imagine if a poorman's "Clerks" met "The Burning". Not a great movie by any standard but definitely worth a rental or low price purchase.
SPRINKLER SCENE = FUNNY!
brainspoon14 December 2003
What saves this film is that the tone is just right, funny and laidback and tongue in cheek. No cure for cancer, just a groovy goodtime.
The actors are all comfortable in front of the camera, especially the lead actor, who just strolls through his scenes with a been there done that attitude that is a refreshing change from the furrowed brow method that passes for acting these days.
The screenplay is funny and lean, bad dialogue is not a detriment here.
The SFX are of the pump blood from under the weapon variety, but some are very creative and funny. Their unrealistic quality adds to the film's charm.
All the bad points of this film work for it in the long run. The inane conclusion to the inane plot fits because the filmmakers knew that they were making a spoof.
The film did seem very static and some scenes meandered to pad the film out, but this is common in a low budget movie.
The trailer is misleading however. John Rocker fans will be disappointed when they find that he is only in the movie for five minutes. The filmmakers acknowledge this in the screenplay; it is part of the joke so I can call no foul on it.
Overall, a fine horror spoof of the slasher films I grew up with, with a refreshing choice for lead actor, interesting kills, and a laid back feel that makes it easy to like.
The actors are all comfortable in front of the camera, especially the lead actor, who just strolls through his scenes with a been there done that attitude that is a refreshing change from the furrowed brow method that passes for acting these days.
The screenplay is funny and lean, bad dialogue is not a detriment here.
The SFX are of the pump blood from under the weapon variety, but some are very creative and funny. Their unrealistic quality adds to the film's charm.
All the bad points of this film work for it in the long run. The inane conclusion to the inane plot fits because the filmmakers knew that they were making a spoof.
The film did seem very static and some scenes meandered to pad the film out, but this is common in a low budget movie.
The trailer is misleading however. John Rocker fans will be disappointed when they find that he is only in the movie for five minutes. The filmmakers acknowledge this in the screenplay; it is part of the joke so I can call no foul on it.
Overall, a fine horror spoof of the slasher films I grew up with, with a refreshing choice for lead actor, interesting kills, and a laid back feel that makes it easy to like.
The New MVP of Horror-Comedy
Sergeant D28 June 2002
The world of low budget horror movies is infamous for turning out movies that are supposed to be funny and scary, yet in actuality just turn out to be disappointing. The Greenskeeper shatters this mold. The movie delivers a great deal of that good old slasher carnage, yet actually holds a plot and makes you laugh all the way through. The Greenskeeper's Murderous tactics all involve golf course tools. You may not have ever suspected a golf course to be a dangerous place, but this movie will surely make you laugh and think of promiscuous teens getting killed whenever you step onto a golf course from now on. It's par for the corpse!
Very surprised at how much I liked it.
poolandrews9 January 2006
Warning: Spoilers
The Greenskeepr tells the tale of the 'Summerisle Country Club' golf course & it's assistant greenskeeper Allen Anderson (Allelon Ruggiero). It's the day of his 25th birthday & lately Allen has been suffering from horrible nightmares, his step-dad John (Bruce Taylor) treats him like an idiot, his mum (Alfea Thomas) is an alcoholic, his girlfriend Mary Katherine (Allison Kulp) treats him like dirt, he has a crush on a Spanish waitress Elena Rodriguez (Melissa Ponzio), everyone makes fun of him & his only mate is Oatis Washington (Thomas Merdis) the head greenskeeper. Oh & he is a failed screenwriter too. That night his girlfriend Mary Katherine & a bunch of her friends, Mary Beth (Stephanie Bingham), Mary Jane (Christi Taylor), Chas (Steve Rickman), Champ (Jamie Renell), Chet (Michael Short) & Stu (Patrick Donovan) decide to hold a party & convince Allen to open the club up after hours. However as they party, take drugs, have sex & fool around a psychotic killer dressed in a greenskeeper outfit starts to kill them off one by one...
Directed by Kevin Greene who has a cameo in the film as Chip plus he co-wrote & produced it, Adam Johnson who also has a cameo in the film, & Tripp Norton who also produced I was amazed at how much I actually enjoyed The Greenskeeper. The script by Greene & Alex Weir who, like everyone else it seems, has a small cameo somewhere, is at it's most basic a horror comedy. It definitely doesn't take itself too seriously but does take itself seriously enough to be credible. Horror comedy is a very difficult thing to pull off successfully as getting the balance right probably isn't an easy thing but The Greenskeeper has a really nice balance between to the two in my opinion, it's not too jokey to become stupid & still serves up the sex, nudity & gore. There are a few nice amusing moments here, the self referential dialogue is present & is quite clever. The character's were far less annoying then they should be, I don't know why but I liked them. The Greenskeeper is maybe a little slow to get going but once it does it never lets up with one gory murder after another. I also was impressed with the ending which at least tries one or two nice twists, how effective they are will depend on how many of these things you've seen although I seen loads of slashers & I still thought the killers identity & motives were cool. Think Scream (1996) on a golf course! Also think The Burning (1981) the slasher The Greenskeeper resembles the most, an accident that leaves someone horribly burned, the burned person supposedly out for revenge, the garden shears as a weapon including slitting someone's throat with them.
Director's Greene, Johnson & Norton do a good job but I must admit I'm surprised it took three people to direct. There are some good scenes, some creepy scenes & some funny scenes. There are also some really cool gore scenes, a slit throat, a burned man, a clothes hook stuck through someones throat, a couple having sex have a huge hole punched into them with the things you make holes on the golf course with, someone gets nails shot into their face, a decapitation & my favourite bit when someone has a lawn sprinkler stuck into their stomach & their blood squirts out of the sprinkler all over the place. There are also pleasing amounts of sex, nudity & a girl sitting on a toilet.
I am surprised, again, that The Greenskeepr only had a budget of about $80,000 as this is an extremely well made & competent film throughout. This is the sort of thing all low budget filmmakers should aspire too, no fancy CGI special effects that look awful & decent professional cinematography where the camera remains steady so you can actually see what going on. The acting was OK & there are some hot babes in this as well, which doesn't hurt.
I'm pretty sure most people will dismiss The Greenskeeper as just another low budget slasher film & I suppose that's what it is, but I saw just a little bit more in it. I have good feelings towards this film & while I can't recommend it over classics like Scream or Friday the 13th (1980) if you like your slashers tongue-in-cheek I strongly urge you check this one out. Remember, It's Par for the Corpse...
Directed by Kevin Greene who has a cameo in the film as Chip plus he co-wrote & produced it, Adam Johnson who also has a cameo in the film, & Tripp Norton who also produced I was amazed at how much I actually enjoyed The Greenskeeper. The script by Greene & Alex Weir who, like everyone else it seems, has a small cameo somewhere, is at it's most basic a horror comedy. It definitely doesn't take itself too seriously but does take itself seriously enough to be credible. Horror comedy is a very difficult thing to pull off successfully as getting the balance right probably isn't an easy thing but The Greenskeeper has a really nice balance between to the two in my opinion, it's not too jokey to become stupid & still serves up the sex, nudity & gore. There are a few nice amusing moments here, the self referential dialogue is present & is quite clever. The character's were far less annoying then they should be, I don't know why but I liked them. The Greenskeeper is maybe a little slow to get going but once it does it never lets up with one gory murder after another. I also was impressed with the ending which at least tries one or two nice twists, how effective they are will depend on how many of these things you've seen although I seen loads of slashers & I still thought the killers identity & motives were cool. Think Scream (1996) on a golf course! Also think The Burning (1981) the slasher The Greenskeeper resembles the most, an accident that leaves someone horribly burned, the burned person supposedly out for revenge, the garden shears as a weapon including slitting someone's throat with them.
Director's Greene, Johnson & Norton do a good job but I must admit I'm surprised it took three people to direct. There are some good scenes, some creepy scenes & some funny scenes. There are also some really cool gore scenes, a slit throat, a burned man, a clothes hook stuck through someones throat, a couple having sex have a huge hole punched into them with the things you make holes on the golf course with, someone gets nails shot into their face, a decapitation & my favourite bit when someone has a lawn sprinkler stuck into their stomach & their blood squirts out of the sprinkler all over the place. There are also pleasing amounts of sex, nudity & a girl sitting on a toilet.
I am surprised, again, that The Greenskeepr only had a budget of about $80,000 as this is an extremely well made & competent film throughout. This is the sort of thing all low budget filmmakers should aspire too, no fancy CGI special effects that look awful & decent professional cinematography where the camera remains steady so you can actually see what going on. The acting was OK & there are some hot babes in this as well, which doesn't hurt.
I'm pretty sure most people will dismiss The Greenskeeper as just another low budget slasher film & I suppose that's what it is, but I saw just a little bit more in it. I have good feelings towards this film & while I can't recommend it over classics like Scream or Friday the 13th (1980) if you like your slashers tongue-in-cheek I strongly urge you check this one out. Remember, It's Par for the Corpse...
Greatest movie ever - I think so.
jesusforsale28 December 2006
This movie is brilliant, it's the best movie ever made. The actors are crap and retarded. They should make a sequel as soon as possible. It's definitely worth buying or at least rent it. You won't be disappointed! If you like this film I would recommend the great film 'Så some i Himmelen' starring the award winning actor Mikael Nyqvist. The beginning of the movie is really captivating with great performances from the actors. Should Zidane had been in it it would have been an even better film, I would have liked to have seen him in the role of the killer. I would also have liked to have seen Elijah Wood in this film as he is the greatest actor ever...unfortunately he was busy making films about some hobbit.
I loved it!
I loved it!
So Silly/Stupid It's Funny! (Possible Spoilers)
mwendel25 January 2004
Warning: Spoilers
In some strange way I see this as Caddyshack, Friday the 13th, Scary Movie, Half-Baked all mixed in a cauldron with the Kentucky Fried Movie stirring up the mix. You have over-the-top privileged teens, a scheming old man, the old mentor type character, a reclusive accident survivor, and the pothead lead character all intertwined in this ridiculous parody of old-school horror and humor. The bleeding is comical and over the top (very much like what you'd see in Monty Python) which makes the killings satirical. There are some good old-fashioned female screams that you were so used to seeing in the old school horror movies. You can see a lot of influences in this film. If you liked Scary Movie you'll probably find yourself laughing at this one too.
Good, not great
tim-173-68588630 September 2011
I just ordered this movie from Amazon. I'm going against the grain and ranking it higher than most. Considering it was shot on an estimated $80k budget, I thought it was very good. The acting was a little weak and the story somewhat lacking, which is expected at this budget, however, it was incredibly entertaining. I would have liked to see more of the Greenskeeper (John Rocker). I rated it 9/10 because I would have liked to see more Rocker!
Rumor is, there's a sequel coming. I would be anxious to see a follow up. I do wonder what John Rocker is up to these days. He looks just as mean carrying a chainsaw as he did charging out of the bullpen.
Rumor is, there's a sequel coming. I would be anxious to see a follow up. I do wonder what John Rocker is up to these days. He looks just as mean carrying a chainsaw as he did charging out of the bullpen.
No Classic, But Does Provide Some Goofy Gory Entertainment
ObscureCinema1019 June 2012
It seems like everywhere you turn there's some horror movie that's trying to be a throwback to the golden age of eighties slashers. However, none that I've come across have perfectly captured the magic that can be found within a VHS of something like BLOOD RAGE or ROCKTOBER BLOOD. Some have come close (CLUB DREAD), and others have failed miserably. So which category does THE GREENSKEEPER fall under?
Allen is the assistant greens keeper at a lush country club, which his mother and stepfather/ex-uncle own. Some snobby young adults convince him to let them in after the place is closed for a little party. However, someone wearing a greens keeper's outfit begins picking them off in various creative and gruesome ways. Is it Allen, who's had enough with the snobs that tease him? Is it Otis, the head greens keeper who's a little loopy? Or is it Allen's father, back from the dead?
The only thing that saved THE SLEEPER from being complete bottom of the barrel trash was the kills, which really brought be back to the methods of murder in classic late twentieth-century slashers. The same almost applies for THE GREENSKEEPER. Most of the kills are reserved for the last half-hour or so, and they are SUPERB. They're gory, funny, and creative, with each utilizing the golf-theme to a tee (pun not intended). Nails are put in one of those automatic tennis ball shooters, tees are forced through someone's forehead, some gets beaten to death with a nine-iron (I think), and you know those golf ball washers? A DIFFERENT kind of balls is put in it. Ouch.
However, some of the characters in THE GREENSKEEPER are likable, including Allen, Otis, and even Allen's stoner friend. You get a sense that these are real people and they come across as very likable. The snobs that get in, however, you want to see die immediately. This is where it fails as an eighties throwback. Typically in eighties movies, we follow the group for most of the time. Here, most of the time is spent on Allen, and him getting most of the attention causes the movie to drag a tad.
However, I loved the killer's disguise, the ridiculous reveal of the killer (as well as his death), the motive, etc. There are some intentionally funny moments during the first hour or so, but as a whole, it felt very blah before the kills began. It was a bit of a chore to sit through, but the brilliant deaths made up for it.
Overall, I liked it. It's nothing special, but it's a decently fun watch if you want to get your slasher kicks. It's far from a perfect slasher, but it's really not that bad as far as entertainment goes.
Don't go in expecting a new classic, but you could certainly do worse.
Allen is the assistant greens keeper at a lush country club, which his mother and stepfather/ex-uncle own. Some snobby young adults convince him to let them in after the place is closed for a little party. However, someone wearing a greens keeper's outfit begins picking them off in various creative and gruesome ways. Is it Allen, who's had enough with the snobs that tease him? Is it Otis, the head greens keeper who's a little loopy? Or is it Allen's father, back from the dead?
The only thing that saved THE SLEEPER from being complete bottom of the barrel trash was the kills, which really brought be back to the methods of murder in classic late twentieth-century slashers. The same almost applies for THE GREENSKEEPER. Most of the kills are reserved for the last half-hour or so, and they are SUPERB. They're gory, funny, and creative, with each utilizing the golf-theme to a tee (pun not intended). Nails are put in one of those automatic tennis ball shooters, tees are forced through someone's forehead, some gets beaten to death with a nine-iron (I think), and you know those golf ball washers? A DIFFERENT kind of balls is put in it. Ouch.
However, some of the characters in THE GREENSKEEPER are likable, including Allen, Otis, and even Allen's stoner friend. You get a sense that these are real people and they come across as very likable. The snobs that get in, however, you want to see die immediately. This is where it fails as an eighties throwback. Typically in eighties movies, we follow the group for most of the time. Here, most of the time is spent on Allen, and him getting most of the attention causes the movie to drag a tad.
However, I loved the killer's disguise, the ridiculous reveal of the killer (as well as his death), the motive, etc. There are some intentionally funny moments during the first hour or so, but as a whole, it felt very blah before the kills began. It was a bit of a chore to sit through, but the brilliant deaths made up for it.
Overall, I liked it. It's nothing special, but it's a decently fun watch if you want to get your slasher kicks. It's far from a perfect slasher, but it's really not that bad as far as entertainment goes.
Don't go in expecting a new classic, but you could certainly do worse.
Nifty slasher send-up
Woodyanders13 March 2013
Warning: Spoilers
A mysterious killer dressed up as a greenskeeper bumps off the stuck-up snobs at a posh country club with various golf tools. Directors Kevin Greene, Adam Johnson, and Tripp Norton, working from a blithely inane script by Greene and Alex Weir, relate the entertainingly silly story at a steady pace, maintain an affable tongue-in-cheek tone throughout, and poke affectionate fun at assorted slice'n'dice movie clichés (for example, certain characters clearly mark themselves for doom by smoking pot, snorting coke, and doing the deed). Moreover, it's acted with enthusiasm by a game no-name cast: Alledon Ruggiero makes for a likable hero as lovable loser assistant greenskeeper Allen Anderson, Thomas Merdis is likewise engaging as the easygoing Otis Washington, Ron Lester brings a laid-back charm to his role as amiable stoner Styles, and Melissa Ponzio radiates tremendous appeal as the sweet Elena Rodriguez. The inventively gory murder set pieces deliver the grisly goods. Matthew MacCarthy's sunny cinematography gives the picture an attractive bright look and offers several strikingly creepy images of the psycho greenskeeper stalking his victims. King Winger's funky-bumping score hits the right-on groovy spot. As a yummy extra plus, buxom blonde Playboy model Christi Taylor bares her beautifully bountiful breasts. An enjoyable little flick.
You will laugh, groan and gag
Pebbles-G3 August 2003
Release date is September 9, 2003.
1) If you enjoyed movies like "Don't go in the House," or "Don't go in the Basement," then you must like low budget horror films that are so campy they are funny. The Greenskeeper is one of those movies.
2) If you laughed during Final Destination 2 because people were killed off in a funny manner then you'll also laugh at the way adults (not teens) are killed off in The Greenskeeper.
3) If seeing a couple killed while they are having sex bothers you than this is not the movie for you. Although the way he kills them is so gross and so funny that you will be laughing and gaging at the same time.
The point of this movie is not to scare you but to make you laugh.
You laugh not because of any witty banter but because the banter is so bad that you groan.
You laugh because the budget for special effects was so low that the killings looked really fake but that's the beauty of seeing these types of films. In fact at the end of the movie when one of the special effects gets a little carried away the actors broke character and started laughing but the producers kept this shot anyway. The producers understood they were not making some great piece of art to scare you off of a golf course.
If you are a John Rocker fan and plan on buying this movie because he's in it let me warn you ahead of time you'll only get to see John's face for maybe a total of 2 minutes during the film. About half of his screen time is spent in make-up like a serious burn victim (The rest of the time he looks very cute). When the killer goes on his rampage he's in a beekeepers bonnet so you can't see his face. The producers said they had asked John (not his character) to help out by throwing tennis balls off camera onto the tennis court when the tennis ball machine broke down.
I do plan on buying this movie because I love horror movies that can make me laugh and gag at the same time.
1) If you enjoyed movies like "Don't go in the House," or "Don't go in the Basement," then you must like low budget horror films that are so campy they are funny. The Greenskeeper is one of those movies.
2) If you laughed during Final Destination 2 because people were killed off in a funny manner then you'll also laugh at the way adults (not teens) are killed off in The Greenskeeper.
3) If seeing a couple killed while they are having sex bothers you than this is not the movie for you. Although the way he kills them is so gross and so funny that you will be laughing and gaging at the same time.
The point of this movie is not to scare you but to make you laugh.
You laugh not because of any witty banter but because the banter is so bad that you groan.
You laugh because the budget for special effects was so low that the killings looked really fake but that's the beauty of seeing these types of films. In fact at the end of the movie when one of the special effects gets a little carried away the actors broke character and started laughing but the producers kept this shot anyway. The producers understood they were not making some great piece of art to scare you off of a golf course.
If you are a John Rocker fan and plan on buying this movie because he's in it let me warn you ahead of time you'll only get to see John's face for maybe a total of 2 minutes during the film. About half of his screen time is spent in make-up like a serious burn victim (The rest of the time he looks very cute). When the killer goes on his rampage he's in a beekeepers bonnet so you can't see his face. The producers said they had asked John (not his character) to help out by throwing tennis balls off camera onto the tennis court when the tennis ball machine broke down.
I do plan on buying this movie because I love horror movies that can make me laugh and gag at the same time.
Golf club slasher.
HumanoidOfFlesh17 January 2012
"The Greenskeeper" takes place in Summerisle Country Club.The assistant greenskeeper Alan hates his job,but the place is owned by his mother and greedy stepfather,so he must work.The evening party at clubhouse turns into bloodshed when the burnt up former greenskeeper a la Cropsy from "The Burning" begins to stalk and kill Alan's sexually active friends...Very tongue-in-cheek slasher comedy with few pretty gory death scenes.The dialogue is wacky as hell and there is a bit of always welcomed female nudity.Sleazy and trashy "The Milkman" fake footage has to be seen to be believed.Overall,"The Greenskeeper" is a vastly enjoyable slasher movie with enough blood and madness to satisfy slasher sub-genre fanatics.7 ball washers out of 10.
Didn't expect much, but was surprised
Scarne35618 March 2015
Warning: Spoilers
The Greenskeeper is one of those films that you know will be bad before watching. Still, when nothing else is on, the film makes for entertainment to help pass a rainy day. The version I watched was included in a pack of 15 horror movies that I picked up from Wal-mart. IMDb lists the run time as 90 minutes, while the version I saw was only 82. Perhaps there is a European release that contains the extra 8 minutes? The movie was shot at 2 different country clubs in Georgia: Bridgemill Country Club (Canton, GA), and Whitewater Country Club (Fayetteville, GA). Whitewater definitely looks like an old Georgia plantation house from the Civil War era. All the exterior shots that establish the location as the fictional Summerisle Country Club in the movie use footage of Whitewater filmed during the day or at night. I imagine that most the outdoor scenes involving the pool, tennis courts, and golf course were shot at Bridgemill. I could be wrong though. I have worked as a waiter/banquet server at a country club for almost 3 years. Everything in the film makes fun of different classes, including rich vs poor, straight vs gay, and white vs minority, which is something I've seen personally. There are always stereotypes and impressions that you have about many different people when working in an industry like this, and the film does a good job of showing this, even if it does poke fun at all the drama you'd find at a country club. This includes: Latin American sisters working together to earn enough money to support their family back home, snobby yuppie members arguing over whether or not Bert and Ernie are gay, and the spoiled rich girl complaining "Daddy said I could only get the Beamer. I hate being poor," to which her friend remarks: "Yeah Beamers are so last century," just to name a few. I don't want to say that this film is so bad it's good, because it made more than a decent effort to actually have a good story (it's more than just a greenskeeper killing rich kids having sex at a country club). The special effects were impressive, featuring a sprinkler and a lot of fake blood, and the costumes and sets were very accurate for the setting. It wouldn't win any awards, and has probably never aired on television, but The Greenskeeper is without a doubt, a very watchable and entertaining movie. It's got a few suspenseful scenes, reminiscent of Wes Craven's 1984 classic Invitation to Hell, more than a few laugh out loud funny parts, similar to Caddyshack, and the plot borrowed heavily from the 1981 "summer camp slasher" flick The Burning.
Low budget fun
kyleallencole915 September 2020
Warning: Spoilers
This movie was a low budget film, but it was extremely fun.
Its one of those straight to video movies that probably wasn't well known.
This one was interesting and featured snobby young adults sneaking into a country club after hours for a party and wind up getting slashed to death by a masked killer.
The kills in this were extremely awesome and gut wrenching!! Especially for a small budget film.
They should of shown the character Mary Katherine get killed and not just show her body since she was the most despicable character in the film. Lots of skin shown in this one too.
The killer in the end though was pretty predictable and laughable and definitely one of the best deaths in the film involving the head of a sprinkler.
Lead actress Melissa Ponzio later goes on to play in the hit MTV show Teen Wolf.
Absolutely recommend this fun slasher flick!
WHERE'S THE ART?
nogodnomasters13 June 2019
Warning: Spoilers
Allen ( Allelon Ruggiero) is the under achiever assistant greenskeeper who wants to be a script writer. His step-father is the co-owner of the country club where he works. Allen also has a bodacious blond girlfriend (Allison Kulp) who has personality issues with a capital "B."
There is a legend about a former greenskeeper who was disfigured in a fire. He lives in a shack in the woods and vows revenge against everyone. A group of young adults plan an after hours party with Alan being able to sneak them in. I think you know the rest.
This film is a hybrid between a slasher film and a slasher spoof. In the middle of the film, they are watching another slasher film where they introduce a criticism of their own movie.
This movie includes a flamboyant police officer Cox (John Judy), chesty blonds, stereo type names Chas, Chip, Champ, and Chet, as well as class humor. "We pay them minimum wage, you would think they would try to earn it." The girls are named Mary Katherine, Mary Jane and Mary Beth...sort of like Heathers or Debbie for you "Oblong" fans.
Parental Guide: F-bomb, sex, nudity (Christi Taylor, Stephanie Bingham)
There is a legend about a former greenskeeper who was disfigured in a fire. He lives in a shack in the woods and vows revenge against everyone. A group of young adults plan an after hours party with Alan being able to sneak them in. I think you know the rest.
This film is a hybrid between a slasher film and a slasher spoof. In the middle of the film, they are watching another slasher film where they introduce a criticism of their own movie.
This movie includes a flamboyant police officer Cox (John Judy), chesty blonds, stereo type names Chas, Chip, Champ, and Chet, as well as class humor. "We pay them minimum wage, you would think they would try to earn it." The girls are named Mary Katherine, Mary Jane and Mary Beth...sort of like Heathers or Debbie for you "Oblong" fans.
Parental Guide: F-bomb, sex, nudity (Christi Taylor, Stephanie Bingham)
Not so bad if in the right frame of mind
schris74815 May 2012
Hmmmmm. This is a tough one. A friend gave me a copy of this movie and even he couldn't quite describe it. "Just watch it", he said. And so I did. And yes, it's tough to describe because it does suffer from a nasty case of schizophrenia. It see saws back and forth between serious slasher and spoof. And it does suffer from some serious padding of dialouge at the beginning. But, that being said, there was something about it that I couldn't stop watching. It's like they ran out of money and had to stretch it as much as possible. So, if you can make it through the slow start, there are some creative deaths, wacked out dialogue, and fun to be had. Definite rental or bargain bin purchase.
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