The only one of legendarily untalented Leonard Kirtman's 1974 films I saw theatrically was his atypical CURSE OF THE HEADLESS HORSEMAN, a drive-in staple inept in every way.
Catching up recently on all his 1-day porn wonders from that year, starring my fave Leslie Murray and Andrea True, DANCE OF LOVE is truly terrible.
Slapdash would be high praise for Kirtman's work. The insulting carelessness applied to this improvised stinker has to be seen to be believed.
With the cheapest sets no money can buy, he presents a nonexistent night club where Leslie Murray dances and her roommate, club owner Andrea True, hangs out at a table flanked by silly wall posters suggesting exotic African scenes. True is a prostitute, very hard up for johns.
The third tiny set is what looks like a dressing room with a mattress and clothes rack -one of the crummiest porn settings I've ever seen. It is so yucky, even the ad libbing cast feels the need to comment on its shabbiness, knowing full well that no-retakes Lenny will leave whatever they say in the final print.
What annoyed me the most about DANCE OF LOVE is how Kirtman mistreats his talent. Murray starred in three other Kirtman pictures in 1974, notably BADGE '69'. Yet here he makes her look terrible, dancing around on the tiny stage looking like a concentration camp inmate in some benighted Roberto Benigni/Jerry Lewis WWII goes porn vehicle.
He even has her do a lame "humping a bottle" dance, like the infamous Joe D'Amato stripper hardcore sequence in EROTIC NIGHTS OF THE LIVING DEAD, but fortunately Leslie fakes it, strictly softcore.
At the same low level is the film's underage looking no-name actor paired with MILF Andrea True. This guy is, like Murray, emaciated and thoroughly unappealing as a porn performer. Unless you're trying to gross out the audience, with dwarf actors or at the other extreme repellent types like Ken Turner in FEMMES DE SADE, there's no excuse for this casting.
Main storyline has True getting a crush for the youngster, initiating him to sex. Murray humps a creepy customer (Don Allen) who likes "short, thin girls". Eric Edwards, with glasses and unimpressively playing a nerd, also goes to bed with True. Andrea is photographed unflatteringly throughout the film and apparently there was zero makeup budget, causing her to look more like Robin Byrd than the beauty she is in her best movies.
The sex scenes are mechanical, and Kirtman stretches by staging several phony money shots -not requiring the male talent to do anything as their female partners orally fake the ejaculation payoff. Covered in tattoos, the porn Jack Webb gives a smug, lousy performance, his only function to deliver anal sex with Andrea.
Topping it off, Leonard has the temerity to play familiar classic tracks by Jimi Hendrix (from "Electric Ladyland") and Jefferson Airplane -nonstop. Pirated music is meant to enhance the footage, but the porn merely desecrates these unauthorized samplings.
Catching up recently on all his 1-day porn wonders from that year, starring my fave Leslie Murray and Andrea True, DANCE OF LOVE is truly terrible.
Slapdash would be high praise for Kirtman's work. The insulting carelessness applied to this improvised stinker has to be seen to be believed.
With the cheapest sets no money can buy, he presents a nonexistent night club where Leslie Murray dances and her roommate, club owner Andrea True, hangs out at a table flanked by silly wall posters suggesting exotic African scenes. True is a prostitute, very hard up for johns.
The third tiny set is what looks like a dressing room with a mattress and clothes rack -one of the crummiest porn settings I've ever seen. It is so yucky, even the ad libbing cast feels the need to comment on its shabbiness, knowing full well that no-retakes Lenny will leave whatever they say in the final print.
What annoyed me the most about DANCE OF LOVE is how Kirtman mistreats his talent. Murray starred in three other Kirtman pictures in 1974, notably BADGE '69'. Yet here he makes her look terrible, dancing around on the tiny stage looking like a concentration camp inmate in some benighted Roberto Benigni/Jerry Lewis WWII goes porn vehicle.
He even has her do a lame "humping a bottle" dance, like the infamous Joe D'Amato stripper hardcore sequence in EROTIC NIGHTS OF THE LIVING DEAD, but fortunately Leslie fakes it, strictly softcore.
At the same low level is the film's underage looking no-name actor paired with MILF Andrea True. This guy is, like Murray, emaciated and thoroughly unappealing as a porn performer. Unless you're trying to gross out the audience, with dwarf actors or at the other extreme repellent types like Ken Turner in FEMMES DE SADE, there's no excuse for this casting.
Main storyline has True getting a crush for the youngster, initiating him to sex. Murray humps a creepy customer (Don Allen) who likes "short, thin girls". Eric Edwards, with glasses and unimpressively playing a nerd, also goes to bed with True. Andrea is photographed unflatteringly throughout the film and apparently there was zero makeup budget, causing her to look more like Robin Byrd than the beauty she is in her best movies.
The sex scenes are mechanical, and Kirtman stretches by staging several phony money shots -not requiring the male talent to do anything as their female partners orally fake the ejaculation payoff. Covered in tattoos, the porn Jack Webb gives a smug, lousy performance, his only function to deliver anal sex with Andrea.
Topping it off, Leonard has the temerity to play familiar classic tracks by Jimi Hendrix (from "Electric Ladyland") and Jefferson Airplane -nonstop. Pirated music is meant to enhance the footage, but the porn merely desecrates these unauthorized samplings.