The boys get snowed in at the hospital while waiting to learn the identity of Cartman's father. Meanwhile, the townspeople resort to cannibalism when they get snowed in.
Mr. Barbrady goes back to school after it is discovered that he is illiterate. As he learns to read, a criminal is on the loose molesting all the chickens in South Park.
Mr. Mackey is fired from school after losing a marijuana sample in class and winds up becoming a druggie, and Kyle tries to keep his brother Ike from having his bris after he finds out what will take place during the ceremony.
The people of South Park attempt to raise awareness of the school nurse's disability. Meanwhile, the boys travel to China to compete in a dodge ball championship.
The kids get revenge on Jimbo and Ned after they fail their report on Vietnam. However, their practical joke sparks a fierce ratings war between "Jesus and Pals" and Jimbo and Ned's hunting program.
Hollywood big-shots try to turn South Park into another Sundance. However, they wreak havoc on the town's eco-system, which could cause Mr. Hankey to die.
All of South Park's cows become mesmerized by the town's new Wooden Cow Memorial. Meanwhile, the kids' plan to win a Terence and Philip doll from a carney at the Cow Days festival becomes complicated and dangerous.
Stan thinks his new pet fish is evil after it kills two people in his bedroom. Also, the parallel-universe version of Cartman shows up in South Park, and everyone likes him more than the real Cartman.
Stan, Kyle and Kenny go to Nebraska to spend Christmas with Eric's family. Meanwhile, Charlie Manson escapes from prison with Eric's uncle, and the boys help teach him the true meaning of Christmas.
A school assignment pairs the boys up with Tweek, a neurotic boy who claims that gnomes are stealing his underwear. Meanwhile, Tweek's father fights against a corporation that is stealing his business.