1/10
Batman for people who don't want to watch batman
9 February 2024
Have you ever seen or read anything batman related and thought that he is too smart? Too observant? Too capable? Then this is the movie for you. What this movie does is takes batman and removes every single thing that makes the character.

Firstly he is the dumbest version of batman ever created, even when things are spoon fed to him he is still left scratching his head.

Secondly, he is so bad at any and all forms of combat that it would be more accuracte to call him a punching bag than an opponent, there are characters who I won't name to avoid spoilers, but characters who do not even have hand to hand combat as part of their abilities who embarass this batman.

Third he has no guard whatsoever, the majority of the screentime is spent with him being outplayed, outsmarted and outright manipulated by every D-lister gotham has to offer.

Finally, in addition to not having batmans intelligence, or detective skills or combat abilities or rigid defense or contingencies ontop of contingencies, this batman also has no morals. When he finally manages to read the spelling in front of his face and figures out babies first mystery how does he react? He listens to the culprit monologue, openly admitting to a whole host of crimes and then with no explanation whatsoever batman walks away leaving the person to get off with a multitude of crimes with zero repurcussions.

Personally I am not a fan of batman, his whole "i refuse to do any actions that will actually lower the crime rate because of a nonsensical slippery slope cop out I cling to" is long past boring so I am all for different iterations of the character, but I have no idea who this batman is supposed to cater to. Personally I have never watched or read anything DC related and though to myself " you know what would make this better? If the protagonist was a knuckle dragging, morally devoid simpleton who stands for nothing, accomplishes nothing, gets slapped around and then the story is brought to a flat unceremonious end"
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