Review of Settlers

Settlers (2021)
1/10
Nothing Martian about this dismal dog of a film
22 March 2022
"Settlers" is about settlers, not surprisingly. This is a frontier story that is a lot like other frontier stories, except it takes place on Mars. Except THIS Mars is warm, has a thick, breathable atmosphere, Earth-strength gravity, liquid water, an Earth-distance horizon, an Earth-distance sun, and hills where you can clearly see sedimentary rocks on a planet that hasn't had oceans for at least a couple of billion years. In other words, there's absolutely nothing to distinguish this movie from any other film about settling a lawless and brutal frontier except that it's supposed to take place on Mars, and there's nothing about the setting or the action in this movie that looks like Mars except that the characters say it's Mars.

There are films that call for the willing suspension of disbelief, which is fine; and then there are movies - like this one - that require that disbelief be not just suspended, but put on permanent leave. Are we supposed to believe that Mars has been terraformed? Even if the technology existed to achieve that, it would take about a million years to complete (a conservative estimate). I'll wager that the likelihood that humans will still be around in a million years is mighty slim.

The actors are mostly attractive, especially the stunningly beautiful Sofia Boutella. But no amount of acting skill can rescue this preposterous nonsense.
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